If you've ever chosen a hotel based on the thread count, argued about espresso extraction at breakfast, or wondered why the airline calls it "business class" when the experience is strictly economy of effort — Batty on Air is for you.
Travel, aviation, fine dining and facts that turn out to be wrong. Told by someone who has been there, eaten that, and has opinions about both.
You probably should have found this sooner. 🦇
battyontour.com
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A nature documentary about a loyalty programme in decline.
Observe: the Miles & More, one of the largest specimens of its kind, attempting something rarely seen in the wild — the systematic alienation of everyone who loves it. Halved status validity. Surcharges for the first row of Business Class. An "International Surcharge" on flights that were already international. All announced as "enhancements."
Meanwhile, somewhere in Ireland, Mr O'Leary is taking notes. And the herd has quietly begun its migration.
19 Jul 2026
Null Island — The Most Visited Place on Earth Doesn't Exist
There's a point in the Atlantic where the equator meets the prime meridian. No land. No beach. Just one yellow weather buoy named Soul, floating alone in five kilometres of water.
According to the internet, millions of people are there right now.
Every broken photo location, every glitched fitness app, every mistyped address — they all end up at the same spot. Map makers invented an island there to catch the errors. Then they gave it a flag. Then it started showing up on real maps.
Batty on Air. Say hello to Soul.
18 Jul 2026
The Black Box — It Isn't Black. There Are Two. And One Is Listening.
Every commercial flight carries two of them. They're orange. They sit in the tail. One records everything the aircraft does — the other records everything anyone says in the cockpit. For the last two hours. Everything.
The man who invented them was supposed to be blowing up fuel tanks. Australia — the country of the inventor — adopted the technology last.
Somewhere right now, one is pinging alone at six kilometres depth. Once per second. For exactly thirty days.
Batty on Air. The one about the thing nobody thinks about until they have to.
21 Jun 2026
The Night That Was Divided — You Were Never Meant to Sleep Eight Hours Straight
You wake up at two in the morning. Wide awake. No reason. And your first thought is: something is wrong with me.
What if nothing is wrong with you?
In this episode, Batty digs into one of the most surprising stories in human history — how people slept for thousands of years before electric light changed everything. The historian who found over 2,000 references to a forgotten sleep pattern. The nine-year-old girl whose 1697 court testimony reveals a world we've completely lost. And why the "mattress company invented 8-hour sleep" story that's everywhere online is itself a myth.
The full article is at battyontour.com. Best read at two in the morning.
Batty on Air — travel, aviation, food, and the occasional fact that everyone believes and nobody has checked.
6 Jun 2026
Who Wrote "My Way"? (Not Sinatra. Not Who You Think.)
Everyone knows "My Way." It's Sinatra. An American classic. A song about a life lived on one's own terms.
It is also, in every meaningful sense, a French song about a failing relationship — rewritten by a Canadian on a transatlantic flight, recorded by a man from Hoboken, and performed most magnificently by an Italian from Modena who sounds like he's winning an argument with the universe.
Also: the composer died trying to fix a lightbulb. In his bathtub.
Music history is considerably more complicated than the karaoke screen suggests.
🦇 battyontour.com
6 Jun 2026
A Toast to Tasting Stars — The Man Who Invented Champagne Was Trying to Stop It
"Come quickly — I am tasting stars!"
It's the most romantic quote in the history of champagne. It was also written by a marketing department in 1821 — more than a century after Dom Pérignon died.
The real story: a brilliant winemaker who spent his career trying to stop bottles from exploding. Workers in iron masks. The English getting there first. And the world's most famous champagne brand named after a man who would have preferred still wine.
The wine is still excellent. The history is considerably more interesting.
🦇 battyontour.com
4 Jun 2026
The Pyjamas Changed Everything — Why Batty Now Flies EVA Air to Bangkok
At some point, you have to ask yourself: why am I still doing this the hard way?
EVA Air. Vienna to Bangkok. Boeing 787 Dreamliner. A flat bed that is actually flat. A pyjama set that arrives approximately four minutes after boarding. An early morning arrival so quiet that Bangkok's immigration resembles a library. And bags on the carousel in Vienna before you've finished reading the form.
This is the episode about switching. Not dramatically. Just sensibly.
🦇 battyontour.com
3 Jun 2026
Whose Croissant Is It Anyway? Austria, France, and the Ottoman Empire Walk Into a Bakery.
Everyone knows the croissant is French. It isn't.
In this episode: an Austrian pastry, a Viennese artillery officer with a bakery in Paris, Marie Antoinette (probably innocent), and the Ottoman army that tried to conquer Vienna in 1683 — and may have accidentally invented breakfast for the entire Western world.
The French perfected it. The Austrians invented it. The Ottomans inspired the shape. And everyone is calling it French.
History is complicated. The butter is not.
🦇 battyontour.com
2 Jun 2026
The Card That Promised Everything — A Horror Story in Four Acts
It arrived in a box. With a ribbon. The ribbon was unnecessary and entirely effective.
This is the story of Batty and the American Express Platinum Card — the seduction, the lounge access, the quiet discovery of foreign transaction fees on every purchase made outside Austria, and the slow, elegant removal of benefits while the annual fee moved enthusiastically in the other direction.
It ends with scissors. And a lesson about reading the small print before falling for the ribbon.
🦇 battyontour.com
1 Jun 2026
The Island That Waited — Koh Samui
Before Koh Samui had traffic jams, it had a dirt road called Chaweng and an airport that was, technically, a hut. With a manual scale. Batty was there.
This episode is about what happens when you find a place before the world does — and what it means when that place finds a hotel that knows your name, remembers your drink, and once opened its doors during a global pandemic on an empty island.
A travel story. A hotel story. And one moment of silence that says more than most things with words.
1 Jun 2026
Who Is Batty? (And Why Does She Have Opinions About Your Espresso?)
Meet Batty. Private pilot. Austria-based. Perpetually en route to somewhere better. And yes, she has opinions about your espresso — nineteen grams, ninety-three degrees, twenty-eight seconds — and she will explain why yours is wrong.
Episode one is the introduction: who Batty is, what this podcast covers, and a preview of what's coming. Airlines. Hotels. Fine dining. And a recurring segment where famous facts turn out to be completely false.
Next episode: a hotel on a Thai island that opened during a global pandemic. On a beach that had been returned, temporarily, to something almost no one has seen.
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