Let's explore faith and research-based pathways to change the emotional atmosphere in your marriage, change your life story, and get you to a baseline of peace and happiness no one can take away from you- even if it's not a joint effort.
bethechangeinyourmarriage.substack.com (https://bethechangeinyourmarriage.substack.com/s/be-the-change-in-your-marriage-podcast?utm_medium=podcast)
Reclining theatre seats, a tub of popcorn (which I usually dump a pack of peanut m&ms into- rapture!) and the Barbie movie with my home girls! (My mom, daughter and one friend 😁) Did you see it? I’d love to hear your take on it.
I was excessively diverted 🤓. There was incredible wit and artistry in the visual details as well as the acting. It moved me to tears from both giant belly laughs and genuine poignant emotion, which was a beautiful surprise. What I thought would be frothy and frivolous fiction turned out to be deeply moving. Other people can talk about the balance of power in the world. I want to talk about your own balancing act of loving yourself and your husband.
I know I questioned my role as I watched the movie and resonated with so many of the difficulties that we face as women and what a challenging job we have to, as was said in the movie, “tie ourselves in knots” for the people around us. So I questioned as I watched, “Are my teachings truly serving women? Am I showing up in a way that’s going to benefit them or am I just adding impossibly more to their already full plate? And here’s what finally came to me: There’s a false dichotomy presented in the movie. The idea that you are either living out your dreams and fulfilling your purpose- becoming President or winning the Nobel Prize, or you're dressed as a maid, and handing your man a brewski, as if those are two mutually exclusive options or pathways to choose from. But that notion is as fake as Barbie’s unattainable proportions.
25 Jun 2023
The Dumpster Fire Marriage Playbook: Getting What You Don't Want
Insights from an excerpt of THE 80/80 MARRIAGE by Nate Klemp PH.D. and Kaley Klemp
Every so often (with about the frequency that someone besides you replaces the toilet paper roll), a certain turn of phrase is able to shift the dusty cumbersome furniture in your well-entrenched mind parlor, revealing something your innermost being has always known which had but awaited the illumination of your recognition, much like the opulent treasures concealed within Tutankhamun's tomb had awaited centuries to be unveiled.
Such was the case when I read the following quote by Gay Hendricks: “In all times and in every way, we are getting exactly what we’re committed to getting.” Wait. Whaaaaaat?
(In conjunction with the brilliant commentary of Nate and Kaley Klemp in their excellent book, THE 80/80 MARRIAGE…)
There’s no way I’m committed to getting no understanding or warmth from my husband and no help around the house!
Perhaps not. But taking responsibility is the ONLY POSITION OF POWER. You’ll get the greatest results in love and life when you adopt the uncomfy view that you are responsible for the results you’ve gotten so far.
Look. I don’t believe that every rotten thing that has happened to you is your fault, or that you need to spend any time beating yourself up over your mistakes. Nor do I want you to assume responsibility to the effect that you feel paralyzed by the overwhelming size of it. What would be the point of that?
But what if you took a curious, loving yet detached look at the aspects of your life you’re disappointed about and said, “What if somehow I am committed to those undesirable results?”
Nate and Kaley Klemp, in THE 80/80 MARRIAGE, ask you to lead with that assumption, not because it’s true, but because the thought experiment will lead you to priceless and indispensable insights.
Reach and audience
Public platform figures. Ratings count people who left a rating, not total listeners.
Apple Podcasts (US)
5.0 / 5
5 ratings
Spotify
5.0 / 5
3 ratings
Contact Be the Change in Your Marriage
Guest appearances
Books guests
Based on episode analysis; this does not confirm that the show is currently accepting guests.
Host of Be the Change in Your Marriage?
Claim your podcast to manage its listing and keep your show details accurate.
Pod Engine is an independent podcast discovery and analytics service and is not affiliated with or endorsed by this podcast. Artwork and show content belong to their owners. Full legal notice.
Explore this show Podcast research with Pod Engine
