Calm Down

About Calm Down

The antidote to internet poisoning. Hosted by Ben Dreyfuss, Calm Down is a podcast about our internet politics nightmare...and how to fix it. www.calmdownben.com (https://www.calmdownben.com?utm_medium=podcast)

Publisher

Ben Dreyfuss

Category

news · society & culture

Language

en

Explicit

No

First episode

27 Apr 2022

Latest episode

23 Jan 2026

Latest episodes

7 episodes in the feed.

1. 

   23 Jan 2026

   Live with Josh, Megan & Ben

   Get full access to Calm Down at www.calmdownben.com/subscribe (https://www.calmdownben.com/subscribe?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_4)

2. 

   19 Dec 2025

   We did a Substack Live. Here is a recording of it.

   Get full access to Calm Down at www.calmdownben.com/subscribe (https://www.calmdownben.com/subscribe?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_4)

3. 

   3 Jul 2024

   Episode 1: The Flight 93 Convention (with Harry Dreyfuss)

   SummaryBen Dreyfuss and Harry Dreyfuss introduce their new podcast and discuss their unique dynamic. They talk about their different skills and personalities, with Ben being a journalist and Harry being a therapist. They also discuss their intelligence levels and humor. They then move on to discuss the recent presidential debate between Joe Biden and Donald Trump, with Ben criticizing Biden's performance. They explore the possibility of Biden stepping down and the potential candidates to replace him. In this conversation, Ben Dreyfuss discusses the dynamics of power within institutions and the reluctance of some individuals to let go of their power, even if it means protecting the institution itself. He also reflects on the contemptuous attitude towards Republicans who forgave Trump after the January 6th attack on the Capitol, and his own struggle with being a hypocrite. The conversation then shifts to a letter from a college student who is concerned about how their predominantly white neighbors will react to their black friend visiting. Ben criticizes the letter writer for assuming their neighbors are racist without any evidence and for dehumanizing their friend. He also critiques the condescending response from the advice columnist, arguing that it only perpetuates division and does not offer a constructive solution. The conversation concludes with a discussion on how to effectively respond to compliments and the importance of participating in social norms. Keywordspodcast, co-host, dynamic, skills, intelligence, humor, presidential debate, Joe Biden, Donald Trump, performance, stepping down, potential candidates, power dynamics, institutional power, protecting power, contempt towards Republicans, forgiveness, hypocrisy, racial bias, assumptions, dehumanization, condescension, responding to compliments, social norms Takeaways Ben Dreyfuss and Harry Dreyfuss have a unique dynamic and enjoy engaging conversations. Biden's performance in the presidential debate was criticized, raising concerns about his abilities. There is speculation about the possibility of Biden stepping down and potential candidates to replace him. The Democratic Party is facing internal divisions and criticism from its own members. People within institutions are often more concerned with protecting their own power than the power of the institution itself. Contempt towards Republicans who forgave Trump after the Capitol attack highlights the struggle to maintain consistency and avoid hypocrisy. Assuming racism without evidence and dehumanizing others based on assumptions perpetuates division and does not lead to constructive solutions. Effective responses to compliments involve acknowledging the compliment, expressing gratitude, and engaging in a positive conversation. Participating in social norms, such as exchanging compliments, helps create a positive and supportive environment. Titles Speculating on the Possibility of Biden Stepping Down Critiquing Biden's Performance in the Presidential Debate The Pitfalls of Condescension: Perpetuating Division Contempt and Hypocrisy: The Struggle to Maintain Consistency Sound Bites "Introducing a new podcast with Ben Dreyfuss and Harry Dreyfuss" "Biden's performance in the debate was a failure on a performance and substance level" "Speculating on the possibility of Biden stepping down" "The first law of institutional power is that people within an institution are more concerned with protecting their power within the institution than the power of the institution itself." "I don't want to be a hypocrite here." "There's a huge section of the country that we can never get to vote." Chapters 00:00Introducing a New Podcast 10:18Critiquing Biden's Debate Performance 25:20Internal Divisions within the Democratic Party 41:15The First Law of Institutional Power 43:09The Divide Between Engaged and Disengaged Voters 48:01Assumptions, Racism, and Dehumanization 51:43The Pitfalls of Condescension 01:02:42Ridiculous Advice from the Washington Post 01:10:44Responding to Compliments and Participating in Social Norms Get full access to Calm Down at www.calmdownben.com/subscribe (https://www.calmdownben.com/subscribe?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_4)

4. 

   17 Apr 2023

   A Calm Down Audio Story: My First Murder

   Hello friends, This is a humorous story about something from my childhood. I could have published it as text but I wanted an excuse to play with Substack’s audio feature and to see if I was smart enough to add intro/outro music. I think I did it ok? Maybe not. They say the best way to learn is to do, so here you go. I do some accents in it lol. Best, Ben Update: if you would rather read this, here is the “script,” but warning: it is not grammatical! I wrote it for ears, not for eyes! I got me a sister. Her name is emily. I love her from here to there but this is a story about a thing she done once when we was young which was a very not nice thing to do. We gotta go back to the early 90s. I was six or seven and she was eight or nine. Don’t matter exactly how old we were; was was children. We moved to Idaho because our momma divorced our poppa and fell in love with this hick surgeon she done met when he took out my tonsils one christmas when we’s was visitin’ for the holidays. And we lived in this big white house that was big only cause it was tall. Aint a wide house, but a tall house. And it was on the bank of a river. Bigwood River they call it here. Lot of grass around the house, some of it long. One day my sister she done been playin’ out there in the long grass and she found herself a snake. A garter snake. Aint got poison, aint got teeth, or maybe it has teeth but they not sharp. This is not a scary snake for adults who know of snakes and their danger. She gets this snake and puts in a terrarium and brings it to her room on the top floor of this tall house. I lived underneath that room on the second floor and I was quite upset. You see I have what the doctors might call a fear of snakes. I had this fear since as far back as I remember. You see one day me and my daddy we was in our house in Los Angeles and we was watching a movie on the TV and there was a snake in it and he looked at me and I must have been three or four and he said, “ben, heres what you need to know about snakes. They look slow because they have no legs, but they’re fast! You see a snake, run!” And I listened to my daddy and I got me afraid of snakes. One time we was at the Mulholland Tennis Club, my sister and me, and we were in the playroom for another child’s birthday and as part of that birthday a animal trainer had come to show us the animals. And one of those animals was a massive 20 ft long snake that the trainer placed on everyone’s laps. I refused that. No snake going on my lap, but I was pressured by my peers to touch the touch the snake’s skin and I tell you as sure as I am standing here when I touched that snake, it turned its head and looked at me from across the room and stared with its dead eyes saying, “i hate you and I would eat you if no one else was around.” I got up and I ran. Many people might tell you if they was subpoenaed here today that I hallucinated that part but I stick by my story and it;’s a he said-snake said. There another movie I seen back in these old times in Los Angeles and it was called Black Beauty. In that movie this boy is on a ship and then the ship sinks and he wakes up alone on a beach and there is this cobra snake and it is about to kill this boy but then out of the blue comes Black Beauty, a beautiful horse the child had met on the ship when the horse was in bondage being brought to some farm somewhere; they had shared a moment, you see. Now black beauty she comes out of nowhere on this beach because she survived the wreck too and she stomps that cobra to death, cementing her eternal friendship with the boy. So me I thinking, I need a horse, but I aint old enough to own a horse because I just yay high but anyways, this is a background for the events of one summer day in a very tall house which rested on the abnk of a very small river which the locals in Sun Valley Idaho nevertheless call the Big Wood. She done brought in that snake from the long grass in a terrarium into her room, and I cried and bitched and begged for her to get rid of it. She said no. It was her snake. Her new pet. I wished and hoped for a horse to come and trample her and her vicious snake to death but the horse did not come and probably couldn’t have fit through the doorway of the house anyway as it was not a wide house. So I tried to go above her head and called my poppa and told him the story and he was sympathetic but removed, told me I had to talk to my mother, and my mother, well, she was at the time under the mind-controlling influence of this hick idiot surgeon who thought I needed some exposure therapy and should be forced to live with the snake. My options had been limited by these monsters. I began to have nightmares of the snake escaping from its cage, slithering down the stairs, pushing open the door to my room, somehow crawling into my bed and then going into my butthole. Butthole penetration aint something I was, at the tender age of 6 or 7, ready to think about—indeed, thirty years later I am still not ready to consider that—so I was quite frightened and touched by the presence of the snake. One day maybe a week or two into this my sister left the house to go play silly time with her friends, like women do, and I was mostly alone. I imagine there was an adult somewhere in the house but not near me. So I was lookin at the stairs up to her room and I thought “up there is my enemy, the snake.” I got weak in these knees and considered running down to the living room to cower in fear as I had done too many times before. But on this day, no. I would stand up for myself. There was no horse coming to my rescue. I would have to be my own Black Beauty. So I done gone down the stairs and out the door and into the long grass myself and grabbed the biggest rock I could find, trotted back up into the house and then further into her room. I beheld the slithering vile creature in his habitat, the terrarium. I girded myself and thought of Black Beauty and then bludgeoned the snake to death with the rock. It did not put up a fight. It had no chance. One strong smash of the rock spread what little brains it had all over the terrarium’s floor. I felt a surge relief as though I had unburdened myself of some great, well, burden. I’d taken agency in my own existence. I was my own savior. I dropped the blooded rock in the terrarium and breathed a sigh of relief as rewarding as the most relieving sighs of the ages. But then my soothed soul was taken unexpectedly by surprise. By what I did not at first know but soon it became apparent to me it was anxiety, that terrible devil lurking in all of us, second guessing our behavior. Was I about to get in trouble for this thing I had done? This murder? It was righteous I believed and continue to believe but would a judge see it that way? Or perhaps more importantly, would my mother? I knew what must be done. I picked up that terrarium and lugged it down the stairs and to the river, which they call the Big Wood, and emptied it out into the cleansing waters. The evil snake’s corpse and the evidence of both my guilt and my power floated away. I rinsed the glass box and brought it back up and put it back in her room. I then went back to my own room and played with my toys, as one does., like nothing wrong in the whole world, no a leaf askew, not a thread of grass broken. Then my sister she come back sometime later and she shouts “where is my snake?” All the adults they say they don’t know and eventually she come to me and says “what you do to my snake” and I says to her “what are you talking about? I don’t know. I haven’t been in your room because I’m too afraid to even go near your evil snake.” “Oh really?” “yeah really.” “Well it’s not there anymire.” “Maybe it broke out. I did warn you that could happen!” And she f*****g stared at me with her knowing female eyes. “Tell me.” And I looked back at her with my one male eye and my ungendered glass eye and said “i swear I have no idea.” I said the the same thing to my momma! And she turned a frowning face to my sister and said , “you said it wouldn’t escape! You better find it!” And she had to look high and low and as you have guessed she turned up no evidence of the snake. About ten years later I told her when we were teens, I said, “i killed the snake” and she said “i knew that” and I said “i knew you knew that but you couldn’t prove it” And one of her friends was sitting there and they said “you killed her pet snake? That’s awful! What’s wrong with you?!?” And before I could launch into the exact spiel, I have just subjected you to, my dear sister interrupted and said, “To be honest it was my fault. I never should have brought that snake into the house. I knew he hated it and I was just bullying him.” And I nodded and she nodded and we both said with our nods, “friends. Friends forever.” And when you think back on these events you see that it’s a coming of story for two people. One is my sister who came of age and admitted that it was a mean cruel thing to do to bring that snake into our house. And two it was coming of age for me because it was the day I became a man and realized I had to be my own black beauty. And guess what? I’d f****n’ do it again too! Get full access to Calm Down at www.calmdownben.com/subscribe (https://www.calmdownben.com/subscribe?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_4)

5. 

   18 May 2022

   The one conspiracy theory that maybe is true

   On this week’s episode of Good Faith Pod, I’m joined by Jonathan Katz, the author of “Gangsters of Capitalism: Smedley Butler, the Marines, and the Making and Breaking of America's Empire (https://www.amazon.com/dp/B092T8KT1N/ref=dp-kindle-redirect?_encoding=UTF8&btkr=1).” We talk about everything! We talk about conspiracy theories! We talk about Cuba! We talk about Teddy Roosevelelt! We talk about earthquakes! We talk about you! Yeah you read that right! We talked about you. Not you in some sort of pretend “listener” sense. We talked about you personally. You! The person reading this! We talked about how great you look and how good you are doing. You should listen. It’s about you. You should actually forward this to your friends and family because they’ll be proud about this talk about you. It’s all good stuff. We talk about you personally in detail. Buy Jonathan’s book (https://www.amazon.com/dp/B092T8KT1N/ref=dp-kindle-redirect?_encoding=UTF8&btkr=1)! Subscribe to his substack (https://theracket.news)! Subscribe to my podcast too (https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/good-faith/id1620973585)! Do you hate this? Do you hate me? Do you hate the weather? Do you like the weather? Do you like me? Do you like this? Tell me about it in the comments! Love and love, Ben Get full access to Calm Down at www.calmdownben.com/subscribe (https://www.calmdownben.com/subscribe?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_4)

6. 

   4 May 2022

   So...how is Joe Biden’s Presidency going? (featuring Josh Barro)

   Joe Biden has been president for almost 18 months. So, how is it going? On this very serious (https://www.joshbarro.com) episode of Good Faith, I chatted with Josh Barro about the state of Biden’s presidency—what’s gone right, what’s gone wrong, and whether or not it’s time for Democrats to panic. Listen please! And subscribe to my podcast (https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/good-faith/id1620973585) and leave nice reviews! And subscribe to Josh’s podcast (https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/very-serious-with-josh-barro/id1601727251) and leave nice reviews! Get full access to Calm Down at www.calmdownben.com/subscribe (https://www.calmdownben.com/subscribe?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_4)

7. 

   27 Apr 2022

   What Happens On The Internet Doesn't Stay There (featuring Emily Dreyfuss)

   Good news! You can now get my smart thoughts sent directly into your brain via your ears! For the majority of human history, people used the oral tradition to hand down knowledge from one generation to the next. All types of knowledge. Knowledge about the Trojan War but also knowledge about where the bathroom was located. People would have these rhythmic poems and they’d sing “don’t put your hand in fire, it will burn! you can’t breathe underwater, do not try! if you hear thunder in the sky, do not cry, sometimes that happens!” Then about 2,500 years ago people started to write things down more and the world changed. Reading, that was the new Jazz! No longer! As of today you might as well gauge your eyes out, because you do not need to read ever again. Say hello to the first episode of the Good Faith Podcast! A show about everything this substack is about, hosted by me, Ben Dreyfuss. It’s not replacing anything! There will still be all the usual fun text based posts here (I guess you shouldn’t have gauged your eyes out), but it does compliment them. If you are a paying subscriber to Good Faith, there will also be lots fo fun bonus content for you to enjoy. :) On this episode, I chatted with a total stranger off the street named Emily Dreyfuss. A Senior Fellow at Harvard’s Shorenstein Center, she’s an expert on misinformation, disinformation, and internet manipulation and the effects those things have on our political system. She has a book coming out in a few months called “Meme Wars,” which you should pre-order (https://www.amazon.com/Meme-Wars-Battles-Upending-Democracy/dp/1635578639). We talk about about everything from 9/11 to James Comey. Special thank you to Tommy Harron for producing this episode and Emily Dreyfuss for coming on! Listen, won’t you? And please subscribe on Apple Podcasts and leave very nice reviews (https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/good-faith/id1620973585?i=1000558918710) so that the Apple Machine recommends my podcast to strangers. Thank you!! Get full access to Calm Down at www.calmdownben.com/subscribe (https://www.calmdownben.com/subscribe?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_4)

Reach and audience

Public platform figures. Ratings count people who left a rating, not total listeners.

Apple Podcasts (US)

4.7 / 5

38 ratings

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Guest appearances

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Based on episode analysis; this does not confirm that the show is currently accepting guests.