Hosted by Courtney Santoro, this podcast goes deep into emotional processing, spirituality, why we are the way we are as social creatures, and how we can be much more compassionate to ourselves. Courtney is a highly sensitive person who works as a teacher and does astrology readings. You can find her @courtneycriesalot on Instagram and TikTok. You probably won't hear her cry much on the podcast, but suffice it to say she very much understands the value of grief and emotional release.
This week I realized that I avoid feeling a sense of longing, or when I feel it, I judge it. I long for more connection, belonging, adventure, meaningful work, a life that feels aligned. And unknowingly, I'd attached shame to longing. Like if I long for something, it must mean there's something wrong with me that I don't already have it.
In this episode, I talk about what Joe Hudson calls the "golden algorithm" - how the feelings we avoid often become the very experiences we keep inviting. I share how I noticed my sense of longing and what happened when I made space to connect with it and feel it. Spoiler alert: the actual feeling of the feeling is never as bad as the idea of feeling it. It actually just feels like a relief.
Joe Hudson podcast about the Golden Algorithm
30 Jun 2026
44. What kind of leader do I want to be to myself?
In this episode, I talk about how one of the main things coming up for me as I'm on summer break is: what kind of leader do I want to be to myself? I have wide open space right now, a lot more time on my hands than I'm used to. Do I want to constantly make to-do lists, manage, evaluate, and try to earn my own approval… or can I be intentional about connecting with myself and making enjoyment the main objective?
I talk about how how I've noticed the ways that I numb out, procrastinate, or feel disconnected from my creativity, and how those behaviors actually make a lot of sense when I realize I'm still kind of relating to myself from a place of evaluation and pressure.
I have so much more fun when I'm enjoying the way I do things. But I can't force myself to enjoy things. If I'm not naturally enjoying, there's usually some resistance or pressure that needs to release first. Some emotional experience to feel into and honor. Then, the levity naturally returns.
When you try to manage yourself and your experience, it breeds more tension. When you connect with and attune to yourself, who you are at your core feels supported and it's easier to just BE. To just be instead of feel yourself trying to perform or contort or become something else. Anyway, thank you for listening
22 Jun 2026
43. The Feeling I Didn't Realize I Was Avoiding
This week I had an experience that surprised me. I felt genuine joy from a great workout - one in which I sprinted as fast as I could, which I haven't done in years. And then I let myself fully feel the joy that came up - not analyze it, not brace for it to disappear, not immediately jump to what could go wrong next. Just felt the joy. I sat with it in my car and let it bubble up and radiate glitter and sparkles and a Lisa Frank aesthetic.
Somewhere along the way, I had unconsciously built a protective wall around feeling too happy because I was afraid of being disappointed, losing it, or getting crushed again. I've become much more practiced at welcoming grief, sadness, and fear - which has helped me soften tremendously. And now I'm ready to reconnect to the part of me who gets gleeful and giddy without judging herself. I've missed her. In this episode, I talk about reconnecting to that part of myself.
If I want to experience more of what I want in life, I can't resist joy anymore. I can't tense against feeling too much of it. Only feeling it for a minute and then saying "ok time to button back up because when the next bad thing happens, I'm gonna feel like a fool for feeling so joyful." If I want to be receptive to more of what I want in life, I gotta be receptive to feeling really good. Sparkly even.
References:
Joe Hudson YouTube Channel (https://www.youtube.com/@ArtofAccomplishment)
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