Don't Tell Me To Get Over It

About Don't Tell Me To Get Over It

On July 8, 2018, my life changed forever. My 94-year-old father—a native of Poland and a survivor of a Nazi labor camp—died peacefully at my childhood home. Despite my denial, I knew it was coming. I was confident I was prepared. I was not. No one truly is. I’m Michelle Gil, aka the Grief Curator, and this is the Don't Tell Me to Get Over It show, where we hold space for grief and rediscover joy – together.

Publisher

Michelle A. Gil

Category

education · health & fitness · society & culture

Language

en

Explicit

No

First episode

28 Aug 2024

Latest episode

20 Sept 2026

Latest episodes

17 episodes in the feed.

1. 

   20 Sept 2026

   Crying in Subtitles

   Both my parents instilled in me a great love for stories. My mother read to me every night as a child and my father told stories from his childhood in Poland. I sometimes struggle to put my grief into words and moments where I don't even realize I'm grieving. Then I read or watch a character go through their grief and I'm able to name mine. This episode is all about how literature and fiction can help us process our grief and fear. Especially when most of our grief support has disappeared. ----------------- 📧 Questions, thoughts, or just want to talk? ask@thegriefcurator.com (mailto:ask@thegriefcurator.com) 💬 Find me on Substack, where I actually read comments https://thegriefcurator.substack.com/ 📅 New episodes every other week Next time: Grief in Translation: My friend Hiromi joined me for a conversation about how death and grief is portrayed in East Asian dramas. ------------- Music: Whispering Horizon by Victor Lundberg | Licensed via Epidemic Sound Note: Unauthorized scraping, AI training, or voice cloning of this audio is strictly prohibited. © 2026 The Grief Curator LLC

2. 

   30 Aug 2026

   Put On Your Grief Boots - It's a New Season

   I'm back and I'm exhausted! In the second half of 2025 I took time off to deal with my own grief. Then 2026 came in with a bang: a fall down the stairs, a broken leg, and losing a job I'd held for seventeen years. This episode is where I tell you why Season 2 might sound different. Less clinical, more up close. Less curated, more real. We talk about Dolly Parton and Tim Curry, about grief fatigue, about why there's no such thing as comparing one loss to another, and about the exact moment I decided I was done doing this the way everyone says you're supposed to. This season, we're putting our grief boots on. We're getting into the garden. And it's just going to be you and me — like it's 2005, and neither of us cares who's watching. 📧 Questions, thoughts, or just want to talk? ask@thegriefcurator.com (mailto:ask@thegriefcurator.com) 💬 Find me on Substack, where I actually read comments https://thegriefcurator.substack.com/ 📅 New episodes every other week Next time: Crying in Subtitles: Why we grieve for people who never existed. ------------- Music: Whispering Horizon by Victor Lundberg | Licensed via Epidemic Sound

3. 

   29 Aug 2026

   Season 2: Casseroles Not Included

   They told you big girls don't cry. They told you six months is long enough to feel sad. We say: crying is healthy, and no one gets to tell you how long to grieve. Season 2 of Don't Tell Me To Get Over It is here and this season, I'm talking about the grief that doesn't come with a casserole. Because some of the losses we carry never get a funeral. No one brings us flowers when we lose our job. No one checks in after our favorite character dies. It's just us and our unseen grief. This season is more raw, more unfiltered, and more real with guest conversations that include grief in Asian dramas, end-of-life planning, and what we love in mid-life, plus solo episodes where I show up exactly as I am: messy, honest, and vulnerable. Season 2 premieres August 30th — National Grief Awareness Day — wherever you listen to podcasts. 🎧 New episodes every other week 💬 Subscribe now so you don't miss Episode 1 Music: "Bygone Empire" by Christoffer Moe Ditlevsen, licensed via Epidemic Sound. Note: Unauthorized scraping, AI training, or voice cloning of this audio is strictly prohibited. © 2026 The Grief Curator LLC

4. 

   1 Oct 2025

   Pain, Van Gogh, & Suicide Loss

   In this first episode of Season Two, I begin with a conversation about suicide loss — one of the most stigmatized forms of grief. I'll explore common myths, the role of stigma and language, and why we now say “died by suicide” instead of “committed suicide.” In this episode, I talk about: Why language matters: the history behind “committed suicide” and the shift toward compassion. Myths and truths about suicide loss. The unbearable “if onlys” that survivors carry — and why they’re a form of self-blame. Anger as a natural part of grief: “How could you leave us?” The difference between suicide prevention and suicide loss support. The ripple effect: how one death impacts hundreds of lives. What Doctor Who and Van Gogh can teach us about love, illness, and letting go of guilt. Resources Mentioned: David Kessler – grief.com NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness) – nami.org Mental Health America – mhanational.org American Foundation for Suicide Prevention (AFSP) – afsp.org Alliance of Hope – Support for survivors of suicide loss (allianceofhope.org) If you are in crisis: If you are thinking about harming yourself or ending your life, please reach out right now. 📞 In the U.S., call or text 988 to connect with the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline. 🌍 If you’re outside the U.S., find international hotlines here: Crisis Text Line is a global nonprofit organization providing free and confidential text-based mental health support and crisis intervention by texting HOME to 741741. The organization launched in 2013, and its services are available 24 hours a day throughout the United States, Canada, UK, and Ireland. International Suicide Hotlines: https://blog.opencounseling.com/suicide-hotlines/ Disclaimer: The Don't Tell Me To Get Over It Podcast is intended for educational and reflective purposes only. Michelle is not a licensed therapist, counselor, or medical professional. The stories, reflections, and resources shared here are not a substitute for professional mental health support or medical care. Music: Monarch by Laura Platt (https://MonarchbyLauraPlatt)| Licensed and Used with Permission by Epidemic Sound

5. 

   1 Oct 2025

   Season 2: Out of the Shadows

   For the next 10 months, I’m pulling grief out of the shadows, breaking past the stigma and talking about it in ways that are honest, messy, and supportive. You’ll hear stories from people who’ve walked through fire—suicide loss. Domestic violence. Sudden disability—and learned what it takes to not just live, but thrive again after devastating loss. So, pull up a chair and I’ll pour you some tea. Let's talk about what grief feels like – beyond the shame that silences us. Season Two starts NOW. Music: Absence by Sam Will; Licensed and Used with Permission by Epidemic Sound

6. 

   22 Feb 2025

   Ask the Grief Curator: Is It Too Late to Reach Out?

   In today’s Q&A episode, I answer a question from a listener who wasn't able to attend a funeral and wonders if it’s too late to reach out to a grieving friend. Many of us worry about saying the wrong thing or reopening wounds, but does grief have an expiration date when it comes to offering support? I explore the hesitation that often holds us back, the impact of belated but sincere gestures, and how to connect in a way that feels meaningful rather than awkward. Whether you've been in this situation yourself or worry about reaching out to someone who is grieving, this episode offers insight, reassurance, and practical ways to show you care—no matter how much time has passed. Tune in to hear: 💭 Why we sometimes hesitate to reach out after a loss. 🕰️ Does timing really matter when offering support? 📩 Simple, thoughtful ways to reconnect without feeling awkward. This podcast is always ad-free and listener supported. I’d love to hear from you—connect with me! Substack: https://thegriefcurator.substack.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheGriefCurator IG: https://www.instagram.com/thegriefcurator/ Website: https://thegriefcurator.com/ Music Intro and Outro: Eulogy | Licensed and Used with Permission of Thrumm, a division of Junius Recording Company Bibliography ExperienceCamps.org (https://ExperienceCamps.org) Founded in 2009, is a national, no-cost program for grieving children who have experienced the death of a parent, sibling or primary caregiver. Our one-week, overnight summer grief camps, year-round programs, and content help to reframe the experience of grief, and empower kids with the necessary coping skills to move forward with their lives. Through compassion, connection, and play, Experience Camps allows grieving children to embody a life full of hope and possibility.

7. 

   15 Feb 2025

   When Grief is New: The First Year

   In this episode, I explore the often overwhelming experience of the first year after losing a loved one. When grief is fresh, it can feel like you're simply muddling through, unsure of what’s normal or how to move forward. I begin by sharing an excerpt from my grief memoir, reflecting on the emotions and challenges of that first year. From navigating milestones and daily responsibilities to understanding how grief shows up in unexpected ways, I walk through what many experience in those early months. Finally, I close with a discussion on self-care—what helped me, and what might support you or someone you love in the tender space of new grief. What You’ll Hear in This Episode: 🖋️A Personal Reflection – An excerpt from my grief memoir, offering a window into my journey. 📅The “Firsts” After Loss – How major milestones and small daily moments shift after losing someone. 💡The Day-to-Day Realities of Grief – Balancing emotions with the practical aspects of life that don’t pause for grief. 🌿How Grief Shows Up – The unexpected ways grief manifests physically, mentally, and emotionally. 💖Self-Care in the First Year – Ways to support yourself through fresh loss, from practical strategies to emotional nourishment. Resources & Links: This podcast is listener supported. I’d love to hear from you—connect with me! Substack: https://thegriefcurator.substack.com/ (https://thegriefcurator.substack.com/) Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheGriefCurator (https://www.facebook.com/TheGriefCurator) IG: https://www.instagram.com/thegriefcurator/ (https://www.instagram.com/thegriefcurator/) Website: https://thegriefcurator.com/ (https://thegriefcurator.com/) Music Intro and Outro: Eulogy | Licensed and Used with Permission of Thrumm, a division of Junius Recording Company. Podcast Disclaimer Michelle is not a licensed therapist. This podcast is for informational and educational purposes only. If at any moment in today’s discussion, you feel triggered, or not ready to face these big feelings, take a break, drink some water or tea, and come back to the podcast when you are ready. If you do find that your everyday tasks are becoming impossible, or if you find you’re having suicidal thoughts, please call 988 or your local emergency number, and reach out to your therapist.

8. 

   17 Jan 2025

   Ask the Grief Curator

   In this special episode, I answer listener questions or share YOUR stories about grief and loss. Today's question comes from listener who has a friend who is dealing with both fresh grief and multiple losses and they want to know: is it too soon to refer their friend to the podcast? if YOU have a question, dear friends, please feel free to reach out to me at Ask@thegriefcurator.com (mailto:Ask@thegriefcurator.com). You can choose to be anonymous, or you can have your first name or initial and city or state or province read out loud. This podcast is listener supported. I’d love to hear from you—connect with me! Substack: https://thegriefcurator.substack.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheGriefCurator IG: https://www.instagram.com/thegriefcurator/ Website: https://thegriefcurator.com/ Music Intro and Outro: Nylon String Theory by Candelion | Licensed and Used with Permission of Epidemic Sound

9. 

   12 Jan 2025

   Romance with a Capital "R"

   Host, Rachel Gurevich, shares her journey of embracing romance with a capital R, reflecting on grief, heartbreak, and life's challenges, and rediscovering beauty and curiosity.

10. 

    23 Nov 2024

    Not in the Mood for Gratitude

    Michelle Vega, The Grief Curator, shares practical strategies for navigating grief during the holidays, acknowledging that it's okay to feel sadness and not be in the mood for gratitude.

11. 

    11 Nov 2024

    The Silent Thief: Grief & Secondary Losses

    Show Summary In this episode, I discuss my experiences with grief and some of the secondary losses that followed the death of my father. My father's passing has impacted my life, especially losses like my sense of identity, security, and dreams I shared with my dad. Even now, I grapple with these changes; however, I’ve learned to adapt, reframe, and even found ways to celebrate new ways of living without my father. You may not be ready yet, and that's okay; I encourage you to reflect on YOUR own experiences with secondary losses and email me to connect and share your thoughts. Episode Highlights Secondary Losses Loss of Identity Loss of Security Loss of Shared Dreams Loss of Freedom Ways to Adapt Connect with me! Sign Up for the Quarterly Newsletter: https://thegriefcurator.substack.com/ (https://thegriefcurator.substack.com/) Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheGriefCurator (https://www.facebook.com/TheGriefCurator) IG: https://www.instagram.com/thegriefcurator/ (https://www.instagram.com/thegriefcurator/) Website: https://thegriefcurator.com/ (https://thegriefcurator.com/) Contact: ask@thegriefcurator.com (mailto:ask@thegriefcurator.com) Music Intro and Outro: Eulogy | Licensed and Used with Permission of Thrumm, a division of Junius Recording Company Bibliography Follow me on Substack to access 7 Secondary Losses & How to Cope when it's released.

12. 

    26 Oct 2024

    Grief, Ghosts, and Getting Through Halloween

    Show Summary In this ghostly episode, I talk about “war, skeletons, cemeteries, and things that go bump in the night.” Halloween can often seem garish to grievers—a mockery of their pain. I felt that way too, and it took me a couple of years to reach a point where it didn’t bother me as much. I also share a story about my father and an encounter he had with his mother during WWII. In part, I believe this story shaped how I saw Halloween and even my own grief. Everyone’s grief journey is unique. With time, meditation, and a willingness to heal, I encourage you to discover new ways of honoring and enjoying this season, perhaps in ways that look different than before. Episode Highlights Halloween Triggers A Personal Ghost Story The Impact of Grief Holding Space for Grievers Healing Through Time and Meditation Reclaiming Halloween After Loss Connect with me! Sign Up for the Quarterly Newsletter: https://thegriefcurator.substack.com/ (https://thegriefcurator.substack.com/) Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheGriefCurator (https://www.facebook.com/TheGriefCurator) IG: https://www.instagram.com/thegriefcurator/ (https://www.instagram.com/thegriefcurator/) Website: https://thegriefcurator.com/ (https://thegriefcurator.com/) Music Intro and Outro: Eulogy | Licensed and Used with Permission of Thrumm, a division of Junius Recording Company During Story: Waiting at 54th by Vincent and A Secret | Licensed and Used with Permission of Epidemic Sound Bibliography Nothing that’s out yet! You can read the “ghost” story and more about my father and his experience during WWII in my upcoming memoir: Don’t Tell Me to Get Over It! Podcast Disclaimer Michelle is not a licensed therapist. This podcast is for informational and educational purposes only. If at any moment in today’s discussion, you feel triggered, or not ready to face these big feelings, take a break, drink some water or tea, and come back to the podcast when you are ready. If you do find that your everyday tasks are becoming impossible, or if you find you’re having suicidal thoughts, please call 988 or your local emergency number, and reach out to your therapist. Sending you love, light, and peace!

13. 

    11 Oct 2024

    Hurricane Helene: Holding Space for Collective Grief

    Episode Title: Hurricane Helene: Holding Space for Collective Grief Brief Show Summary: Hurricane Helene was a catastrophic storm that brought death and destruction to areas unprepared for her wrath. In this episode, we invite you to talk about collective grief through the lens of Hurricane Helene, which devastated mountain communities in North Carolina and Tennessee, as well as coastal areas in Florida. Together, we explore the resilience of the survivors who have come together to rebuild, despite tragedy, and contrast this with the harsh judgment online from those far removed from the on-the-ground efforts. Reflect on the importance of holding space for others in times of collective grief, drawing on Heather Plett’s The Art of Holding Space. The power of creating a safe, compassionate space for people to process their pain without judgment or the urge to fix things is emphasized. This episode is a heartfelt reminder that in both individual and collective grief, empathy and connection are what are most important in grief. Episode Highlights Devastation in the middle of the night Resilience of survivors Reality vs. Online Trolls Distancing Ourselves from Tragedy Holding space The Connection between Imagination & Empathy Personal insights Practice empathy and holding space Connect with me! Sign Up for the Quarterly Newsletter: https://thegriefcurator.substack.com/ (https://thegriefcurator.substack.com/) Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheGriefCurator (https://www.facebook.com/TheGriefCurator) IG: https://www.instagram.com/thegriefcurator/ (https://www.instagram.com/thegriefcurator/) Website: https://thegriefcurator.com/ (https://thegriefcurator.com/) Music: Eulogy | Licensed and Used with Permission of Thrumm, a division of Junius Recording Company Bibliography "Collective Grief happens affects an entire community or large group. It's common during times of war and after major natural disasters that can have long lasting impacts." (An article on Talkspace.com by Liz Kelly) (https://AnarticleonTalkspace.combyLizKelly)) Podcast Disclaimer: Michelle is not a licensed therapist. This podcast is for informational and educational purposes only. If at any moment in today’s discussion, you feel triggered, or not ready to face these big feelings, take a break, drink some water or tea, and come back to the podcast when you are ready. If you do find that your everyday tasks are becoming impossible, or if you find you’re having suicidal thoughts, please call 988 or your local emergency number, and reach out to your therapist.

14. 

    27 Sept 2024

    Grief with No Name: Understanding Disenfranchised Loss

    Shownotes - Episode 003 Guest: N/A Episode live date: Friday, September 27, 2024 Name of show: Don’t Tell Me to Get Over It Guest contact: N/A Episode title: Grief with No Name: Understanding Disenfranchised Loss Brief summary of show: In this episode, we open a discussion on the broader spectrum of grief, introducing the concept of disenfranchised grief—losses that society often overlooks or fails to validate. We explore how various significant losses like breakups, job terminations, or chronic illnesses can evoke real and valid grief, equivalent to the death of a loved one. Through my personal stories and professional definitions, we emphasize the importance of acknowledging all forms of grief and holding empathetic space for those experiencing them. I advocate for naming and recognizing disenfranchised grief, offering support and validation for those navigating these uncharted emotional territories. We talk about: 00:00 Intro 01:21 The Story of No Name Grief 02:58 Understanding Grief Beyond Death 05:01 Personal Struggles with Grief 06:54 Facing Unexpected Emotions 08:47 The Power of Naming Grief 12:35 Disenfranchised Grief Explained 13:03 Empathy and Community in Grief 20:46 Normalizing Grief Conversations 21:18 Closing Thoughts and Resources Connect with me https://www.facebook.com/TheGriefCurator (https://www.facebook.com/TheGriefCurator) https://www.instagram.com/thegriefcurator/ (https://www.instagram.com/thegriefcurator/) https://thegriefcurator.com/ (https://thegriefcurator.com/) https://thegriefcurator.substack.com/ (https://thegriefcurator.substack.com/) Music: Eulogy | Licensed and Used with Permission of Thrumm, a division of Junius Recording Company Bibliography https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/from-rumpelstiltskin-name-tame-why-naming-things-hagerbaumer-pcc/ (https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/from-rumpelstiltskin-name-tame-why-naming-things-hagerbaumer-pcc/) https://www.npr.org/2006/03/20/5285531/the-power-and-mystery-of-naming-things (https://www.npr.org/2006/03/20/5285531/the-power-and-mystery-of-naming-things)

15. 

    13 Sept 2024

    Anger and the Five Stages: A Natural Response to Loss

    Show Notes - Episode 002 Guest: N/A Episode live date: Friday, September 13, 2024 Name of show: Don’t Tell Me to Get Over It Guest contact: N/A Episode title: Anger and the Five Stages: A Natural Response to Loss Brief summary of show: In this episode, we address the complexity of grief, emphasizing that it is not a linear process and validating all feelings experienced. Together, we dive deep into the topic of anger, exploring its roots and how it manifests during grief. Offering personal anecdotes and practical advice, we understand how your own anger and grief are normal and provide tools to manage and process these intense emotions. The episode is a blend of heartfelt conversation, comfort, and support, ensuring that you understand you are not alone in your journey. We talk about: 00:00 Intro 00:26 Understanding Your Grief 00:39 Creating a Safe Space 02:07 Navigating the Stages of Grief 04:43 Dealing with Anger 09:05 Expressing and Managing Emotions 12:11 Supporting Your Children 12:44 Reflecting on Your Journey 15:34 Concluding Thoughts and Resources Connect with me https://www.facebook.com/TheGriefCurator (https://www.facebook.com/TheGriefCurator) https://www.instagram.com/thegriefcurator/ (https://www.instagram.com/thegriefcurator/) https://thegriefcurator.com/ (https://thegriefcurator.com/) Music: Eulogy | Licensed and Used with Permission of Thrumm, a division of Junius Recording Company Bibliography: David Kessler: Finding Meaning - https://a.co/d/60k7FRe (https://a.co/d/60k7FRe) The ABCs of Grief: a children's grief book for all types of grief and loss: https://a.co/d/4QvXKLC

16. 

    30 Aug 2024

    At Home with Grief: The First Meeting

    Shownotes - Episode 001 Guest: N/A Episode live date: Friday, August 30, 2024 Name of show: Don’t Tell Me to Get Over It Guest contact: N/A Episode number and title: At Home With Grief: The First Meeting Brief summary of show: I’m Michelle A. Gil, also known as The Grief Curator, and in this heartfelt episode, I introduce the 'Don't Tell Me To Get Over It' show for the very first time. I open up about the loss of my 94-year-old father and the profound impact grief had on me. The show aims to provide a safe space for discussing grief, understanding its universal nature, and finding ways to cope. Together, we emphasize the importance of validating personal experiences of loss, whether it's the death of a loved one, a breakup, or losing oneself. I share my personal journey, the comfort found in journaling, and the belief that pain can transform into something beautiful over time. This conversation encourages you to embrace your grief without judgment, offering empathy and companionship through shared stories and reflections. We talk about: 00:00 Intro 01:20 Understanding Your Grief 01:51 My Personal Grief Journey 03:27 The Universality of Grief 04:00 Navigating Grief Together 07:57 Coping Mechanisms and Reflections 09:45 The Ongoing Journey of Grief 10:57 Closing Thoughts and Future Visits Connect with me https://www.facebook.com/TheGriefCurator (https://www.facebook.com/TheGriefCurator) https://www.instagram.com/thegriefcurator/ (https://www.instagram.com/thegriefcurator/) https://thegriefcurator.com/ (https://thegriefcurator.com/) Music: Eulogy | Licensed and Used with Permission of Thrumm, a division of Junius Recording Company

17. 

    28 Aug 2024

    Don't Tell Me to Get Over it!

    There is no doubt that I was in denial. My father had always been a strong and healthy man at every age, and in my eyes he was immortal. A world where he simply no longer existed was incomprehensible to me. Any time I thought of losing him I closed my eyes to reality and pretended he would live forever. In the six years since my father died, I’ve joined grief groups, read amazing books on death, went back to therapy, even became a David Kessler certified Grief Educator. And the one thing I’ve noticed that we as grievers have in common? Non-grievers are almost always telling us to "Get Over It." On August 30, come over and set a spell on my debut podcast– Don’t Tell Me to Get Over It—where we normalize conversations about grief, loss, and love explore ways to hold space, and rediscover joy – together. Because we weren’t meant to grieve alone. And you don't have to anymore. --------- Music: On My Way by Ajo | Licensed and Used with permission of Epidemic Sound

Reach and audience

Public platform figures. Ratings count people who left a rating, not total listeners.

Apple Podcasts (US)

5.0 / 5

3 ratings

Podcast Authority Score: 43 / 100

A composite of feed quality, social presence, YouTube performance and engagement. Read the methodology.

Quality

54

Social presence

94

YouTube

0

Engagement

32

Contact Don't Tell Me To Get Over It

Guest appearances

Books guests

Based on episode analysis; this does not confirm that the show is currently accepting guests.