The Functional Idiots Podcast is hosted by Colton and Dillon, both of whom are idiots who somehow function in everyday life. Think of it as a functional drunk, except we could fail a sobriety field test sober. They discuss the offbeat news stories of the week, but also the hard hitting stuff like, “When someone has multiple children at once, twins, triplets, etc., who is the planned child, and who is the accident child?”. They also make fun of people who can’t seem to get out of their own way in life, and bust each other’s balls along the way. If you yourself feel like a functional idiot waltzing through life, then this is the perfect podcast for you! The Functional Idiots Podcast, the dumbest two hours in podcasting!
Ep. 60 - Part 3 - The Birthright Citizenship Debate and Bad Football Graphics
**Side Note. If you do plan to support us on Patreon, DO NOT, repeat, DO NOT do it through the iOS app. Do it on the regular patreon.com/functionalidoitspodcast website or you will be dinged an extra charge every month to cover Apple's 30% fee on app store purchases. Android users are fine using the app, just all Apple users, please use the website. Thank you!**
Remember to “Like”, “Rate”, and “Review” our podcast! We’d also really appreciate it if you would share this podcast with people who you think would enjoy it!
Music licensed by Epidemic Sound
Intro Music: Knock Out the Light - Sunbreak
Trivia Music: 1. Trapped in a Maze - Philip Ayers
Find My Boy and Bring Him Home - Bonnie Grace
So Mad Intro: Death and Destruction - Off Cuts
Pornstar Birthday Music: Last Move - White Bones
Outro Music: Put Me on Fire - Off Cuts
*All sound effects are used under free use copyright*
Email the Show: functionalidiotspodcast@gmail.com
Podcast Website: https://functionalidiotspodcast.podbean.com/
Twitter: Functional Idiots Podcast @funidiotsshow
Patreon Page: https://www.patreon.com/FunctionalIdiotsPodcastYouTube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/@FunctionalIdiotsProductions
“Banger OTW” Playlist: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/2szZRDKwm59leFFwNrBl5M
26 Feb 2025
Ep. 60 - Part 2 - The Birthright Citizenship Debate and Bad Football Graphics
**Side Note. If you do plan to support us on Patreon, DO NOT, repeat, DO NOT do it through the iOS app. Do it on the regular patreon.com/functionalidoitspodcast website or you will be dinged an extra charge every month to cover Apple's 30% fee on app store purchases. Android users are fine using the app, just all Apple users, please use the website. Thank you!**
Remember to “Like”, “Rate”, and “Review” our podcast! We’d also really appreciate it if you would share this podcast with people who you think would enjoy it!
Music licensed by Epidemic Sound
Intro Music: Knock Out the Light - Sunbreak
Trivia Music: 1. Trapped in a Maze - Philip Ayers
Find My Boy and Bring Him Home - Bonnie Grace
So Mad Intro: Death and Destruction - Off Cuts
Pornstar Birthday Music: Last Move - White Bones
Outro Music: Put Me on Fire - Off Cuts
*All sound effects are used under free use copyright*
Email the Show: functionalidiotspodcast@gmail.com
Podcast Website: https://functionalidiotspodcast.podbean.com/
Twitter: Functional Idiots Podcast @funidiotsshow
Patreon Page: https://www.patreon.com/FunctionalIdiotsPodcastYouTube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/@FunctionalIdiotsProductions
“Banger OTW” Playlist: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/2szZRDKwm59leFFwNrBl5M
24 Feb 2025
Ep. 60 - Part 1 - The Birthright Citizenship Debate and Bad Football Graphics
**Side Note. If you do plan to support us on Patreon, DO NOT, repeat, DO NOT do it through the iOS app. Do it on the regular patreon.com/functionalidoitspodcast website or you will be dinged an extra charge every month to cover Apple's 30% fee on app store purchases. Android users are fine using the app, just all Apple users, please use the website. Thank you!**
Remember to “Like”, “Rate”, and “Review” our podcast! We’d also really appreciate it if you would share this podcast with people who you think would enjoy it!
Music licensed by Epidemic Sound
Intro Music: Knock Out the Light - Sunbreak
Trivia Music: 1. Trapped in a Maze - Philip Ayers
Find My Boy and Bring Him Home - Bonnie Grace
So Mad Intro: Death and Destruction - Off Cuts
Pornstar Birthday Music: Last Move - White Bones
Outro Music: Put Me on Fire - Off Cuts
*All sound effects are used under free use copyright*
Email the Show: functionalidiotspodcast@gmail.com
Podcast Website: https://functionalidiotspodcast.podbean.com/
Twitter: Functional Idiots Podcast @funidiotsshow
Patreon Page: https://www.patreon.com/FunctionalIdiotsPodcastYouTube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/@FunctionalIdiotsProductions
“Banger OTW” Playlist: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/2szZRDKwm59leFFwNrBl5M
Reach and audience
Public platform figures. Ratings count people who left a rating, not total listeners.
YouTube views
1,805
Score snapshot 15 Sept 2025
Apple Podcasts (US)
5.0 / 5
2 ratings
Podcast Authority Score: 46 / 100
A composite of feed quality, social presence, YouTube performance and engagement. Read the methodology.
Quality
42
Social presence
0
YouTube
68
Engagement
60
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