Hosted by Kalah Ballance, a mother who knows the unbearable weight of child loss firsthand. Through Grief Left Behind, she channels her grief into purpose — sharing raw stories, and helping families find light, even in the darkest spaces, and fighting for change, one conversation at a time." Her mission: to make sure no grieving parent ever feels alone in the space between heartbreak and hope.
In this moving episode, a father shares the story of Logan — a 16-year-old Royals fan with a gift for making people laugh and a heart that made life brighter for everyone around him. Though Logan’s life was cut short by suicide, his humor, kindness, and legacy live on through the memories of those who loved him most. This conversation explores a dad’s grief, the weight of loss, and the beauty of carrying a son’s legacy forward with love and laughter.
7 Sept 2025
A Brother’s Heart — Grief Through the Eyes of a Sibling
In this deeply moving episode of Grief Left Behind, we hear from Jake, Eli’s younger brother, as he shares his raw and honest perspective on life after loss. Through the eyes of a sibling, grief takes on a different weight—filled with love, confusion, anger, and the longing for moments that will never come again.
Jake opens his heart about growing up without his brother by his side, the way grief has shaped his childhood, and the strength he’s finding to keep moving forward. This is not just the story of loss—it’s the story of resilience, brotherly love that doesn’t end with death, and the quiet courage it takes to keep living when someone you love is gone.
A Brother’s Heart is a reminder that grief touches every member of the family, and that children and siblings carry their own unique battles after suicide loss.
25 Aug 2025
Friends Who Vanish: The Ones Who Couldn't Handle My Grief
Grief doesn’t just take your loved one—it shows you who’s really in yourcorner. In this raw and honest episode, we talk about the friends whodisappeared, the silence that screamed louder than words, and the heartbreak ofbeing ghosted in your darkest hour.
We’ll explore:
• The pain of being abandoned in grief
• Why people vanish—and why it’s not your fault
• What real support looks like now
• How to rebuild trust and find your true circle
• A thank-you to the rare ones who stayed
If you’ve ever felt too much, too broken, or too alone after loss—thisepisode is for you. You’re not too much. You’re grieving. And you deserve to beheld, not handled.
15 Aug 2025
I Was Supposed to Have That
"I was supposed to have that"—the milestones, the memories, the life my child should still be living. Grief isn’t just about losing what was, it’s about losing what should have been. In this raw and unfiltered episode, we talk about the ache of seeing others live the life we were meant to have, the silent jealousy no one likes to admit, and the deep, unfillable hole left behind. This is for every grieving heart who whispers, 'That was supposed to be mine.'
8 Aug 2025
Stop Saying I’m Strong — I Had No Choice
People call us strong because they don’t know what else tosay. But when you’re grieving, “You’re so strong” can feel more like pressurethan comfort. In this raw episode of Grief Left Behind, we explore whatstrength really looks like after loss—the kind that isn’t about bravery, butabout survival.
This episode is for every parent, sibling, spouse, or friend who’s ever beenpraised for holding it together while quietly falling apart.
You didn’t choose this version of yourself. But you’re still here. And that… isno small thing.
If you’re tired of being told how “well” you’re handling your grief—this one’sfor you.
29 Jul 2025
Stop Trying to Fix Me, I'm Not Broken
In this raw and honest episode, we confront the well-meaning but harmful ways people try to "fix" grieving parents. After child loss, we’re not broken—we’re forever changed. This isn’t something to be cured, solved, or silenced. It’s a lifelong grief we carry with love. Join us as we unpack what it means to be seen, not repaired—and why holding space is more powerful than trying to make the pain disappear.
19 Jul 2025
Grief in Flames: The Rage No One Talks About
This week on Grief Left Behind, we’re stepping into the fire—the kind no one talks about.
The kind that grief lights in your chest when you’ve lost a child.
This episode is about rage.
Not irritation. Not frustration. But the deep, raw, burning anger that simmers beneath heartbreak.
The kind that comes when people say the wrong thing. When the world keeps turning. When your child’s name fades from other people’s lips.
We’re naming it. Sitting in it. Letting it breathe.
Because grief isn’t always soft. Sometimes, it roars.
11 Jul 2025
There Are Days I Wish It Was Me
In this raw and vulnerable episode of Grief Left Behind, we speak the words so many grieving parents silently carry: the ache of surviving the unimaginable. This is not about wanting to die — it’s about the crushing weight of continuing to live without the child you love. We reflect on what trauma does to a parent left behind, the guilt, the longing, and the quiet bravery it takes to stay. We also honor Ethan, a remarkable young man, and his brave mother who reminded us last week just how powerful love and truth can be.
If you’ve ever felt like no one truly understands — this one’s for you.
4 Jul 2025
Ethan- The Warrior We Lost
In this powerful episode of Grief Left Behind, we honor the life and legacy of Ethan—a U.S. Marine, a beloved son, a big brother, and a bright light extinguished far too soon.
Born a fighter at just 1 lb 15 oz, Ethan defied every odd from the very beginning. He grew into a kind, loyal, and driven young man with a heart for service. Becoming a Marine was his dream, and he poured everything he had into it—training with discipline, graduating with pride, and always showing up with a quiet strength and that unforgettable smirk.
In this emotional interview, his mother Mejia shares the raw and beautiful truth of who Ethan was—his courage, his joy, the love he gave so freely, and how she’s learning to breathe again without her son.
This is not just Ethan’s story. It’s a mother’s vow. It’s a family’s heartbreak. And it’s a call to remember, to love fiercely, and to speak the names of the children we’ve lost.
For Ethan. For Mejia. For all the warriors left behind.
27 Jun 2025
What Suicide Leaves Behind
They say suicide ends pain—but it doesn’t. It transfers it.
To the mothers, the siblings, the friends left behind—grieving, questioning,breaking in ways no one sees.
This episode is raw. It’s heavy. It’s honest.
It’s for anyone carrying the weight of a loss that shattered everything.
We talk about the trauma, the silence, the guilt, and the love that doesn’t die—because someone has to.
And if you’re listening…
Let this be the reason you stay.
20 Jun 2025
What Grief Has Become
"What Grief Has Become” isn’t just about losing a child—it’s about the quiet, consuming ache of any kind of loss. This episode is for anyone who is grieving… a person, a relationship, a future, a version of themselves. Grief doesn’t fit in a box, and here, it doesn’t have to. Your pain is valid. Your story matters. And you don’t have to face it alone.
20 Jun 2025
When The Unthinkable Became Real
In a single moment, everything changed.
What followed was silence, sirens, and a heartbreak I never knew was possible.
This podcast is my way of speaking through the silence, of honoring his life, and of helping others survive the unthinkable.
6 Jun 2025
The Boy the World Should Have Known
In this deeply personal and unfiltered first full episode of Grief Left Behind, Kalah opens her heart to share the story of her son, Eli — a vibrant, kind, funny, and creative 12-year-old boy whose life was cut tragically short by suicide.
This is where grief began. But more importantly, this is where Eli’s story lives on.
Through raw memories and aching truths, Kalah paints a portrait of the boy the world should have known — not just the way he died, but the way he lived. His laughter, his quirks, his heart. This episode is a tribute, a heartbreak, and a beginning — because before we can talk about grief, we have to talk about the love that came first.
Trigger Warning: This episode includes discussion of child loss, suicide, and trauma. Please listen with care.
4 Jun 2025
A Companion in the Dark
Grief Left Behind is a raw, honest podcast for parents navigating life after the unimaginable—the loss of a child to suicide. Created by Kalah Ballance in honor of her 12-year-old son, Eli, this space is for grieving families, compassionate friends, and anyone who dares to sit in the darkness and speak the truth of child loss.
This isn’t a place for toxic positivity or easy answers. It’s a place for truth-telling, name-speaking, and soul-aching honesty. Each episode explores the real and often unspoken realities of grief—sibling sorrow, birthdays that hurt, organ donation, faith, anger, advocacy, and what it means to carry love forward in a world that no longer makes sense.
If you’ve lost a child or love someone who has, you are not alone. Here, your story matters. Your child matters. And your voice is always welcome.
Interested in being a guest?Message us or find us on Facebook: Grief Left Behind
Let’s walk this path together. One story at a time.
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