Grown Woman Stuff with Julee Jonez is a candid conversation that centers on women’s issues in different seasons of life. The phrase “Age ain’t nothing but a number” may be true, but that doesn’t mean women don’t experience changes in their bodies, relationships, mental wellness and more with every passing year. After all, life at the age of 30, 35, 40 and beyond brings changes women did not experience at 21! Join radio personality Julee Jonez along with special guests for a heartfelt and lively dialogue about this journey.
Valentines's Day Pop Up Episode: Restoring Intimacy - Sex & Beyond - with Aleisha Olatunde
Hey, sis! I know it’s been a minute and I told you I wasn’t too sure what I’d be doing on here for 2024. Well, chile what started off as a radio interview on intimacy took a turn into a short podcast on intimacy, just in time for Valentine’s Day.
Let me rewind to how we even got to the radio interview.
Now, many of you know I have not been delivered from reality television. I try but it’s a weakness! But this past season on OWN’s Love & Marriage Huntsville, the issue of sex, intimacy and even “faking it” was a recurring theme.
We know Kimmie’s cancer treatment killed her libido and she admitted to faking it, simply to take one for the team. Her husband Maurice kept saying “it was a mind thing” and felt some type of way. I had to side-eye the brother because she survived cancer! Dude. Be glad she was even willing to even try and have sexual relations with you!
Then we have Melody and Martell. If you watch the show, you know his infidelity and fathering a child outside their marriage led to their demise. Honey, Melody let it be known she never had an orgasm during their marriage, thus faking it, too.
But we’re not done. Carlos King - being a tad messy- asked Tisha if she ever faked it during the reunion and she admitted she has as well. However, none of this is unusual about women and “The Big O”. Here are a few statistics from Pleasurebetter.com:
81.6% of women don’t orgasm from intercourse alone. Only 18.4% of women report that intercourse alone is sufficient to orgasm.
Only 65% of women orgasm during partnered sexual activity.
5-10% of women have never orgasmed, though many of these women will later in life.
59% of women have faked an orgasm.
So none of the women on #LAMH are alone. But should you fake it? Is your pleasure up to you or your partner? Is sex only about reaching the mountaintop? How important is intimacy beyond the bedroom? Could other issues such as a lack of communication lead to lackluster lovemaking? These are some questions I had to call in a professional to address.
We’re talking to a regular of the podcast, Aleisha Olatunde. She is both a Christian therapist (Whole You Therapy) and sex coach (Whole Intimacy, LLC). So lean in as we chop it up about the barriers to true intimacy, changes in both men and women that can impact their libido, how do you resolve sexual challenges and more.
28 Nov 2023
Sis, it's Toxic: Identifying Unhealthy and Abusive Relationships, with Nadirah Habeebullah, LMFT
Hey, sis! Long time, no talk. I took a summer sabbatical, which wasn’t intended to go beyond September. But I’m back today with a special pop-up episode. As we go into another year, let’s not just examine our financial, physical or career goals. Albeit those are important, we also need to look at other areas of our lives.
Mental health.
Prioritizing our time.
Making rest a necessity.
Implementing self-care.
And assessing the health of our relationships. Yes, we need #RelationshipGoals.
Not the ones celebrated on IG or celeb couples folks long to emulate. I’m talking about making the decision to evaluate the quality of relationships with those around us. Whether it’s romantically, among friends, in the workplace, within a membership organization, unhealthy relationships can exist in various spaces. A recent buzzword regarding these types of interactions is “toxic”. One definition from Merriam-Webster describes toxic as “extremely harsh, malicious, or harmful.”
And toxic behavior is harmful to one’s well-being; it can be a form of emotional abuse.
While there may not be bruises on the body, there is hurt beyond the surface. Whether if it’s derogatory language, stonewalling or gas lighting, these actions within the confinement of a relationship is damaging to the person on the receiving end.
In this episode, we chop it up with Licensed Marriage Family Therapist, Nadirah Habeebullah. She is the owner of Healing Our Trauma, which specializes in trauma and attachment therapy services. We discuss the signs of toxic relationships, how to identify harmful patterns, the impact of emotional trauma and more.
So lean in for “Sis, it's Toxic: Identifying Unhealthy and Abusive Relationships.”
28 Jun 2023
#MarriedAF (And Faithful) Part 2: Sexology & the Saints with Certified Sexuality Coach, Kimberly Stutson
Hey sis! Welcome to this week’s episode of Grown Woman Stuff with Julee Jonez. Today’s chat is not for the pearl-clutchers. Again, we discuss marriage and sex, but with some added spice.
Let me lay the groundwork.
Growing up in the church when it came to sex, all I heard was wait until marriage. When I got grown and married, it was addressed as a task for wives to be sexually submissive spouse pleasers. The onus of a happy sex life was on the wife, with no pleasure responsibility put on the husband. Yes, verses like 1 Corinthians 7:4 seemed to equal things out, saying each other’s body belongs to their spouse. Yet, presenters of the message didn't paint a romantic picture! It was conveyed as duty versus delight.
But there were other missing components. The discussion of couples abstaining from sex only to pray and fast; not taking into account the wife may be going through some things, such as postpartum, perimenopause or stress. Or maybe conflict was the culprit affecting a spouse's libido. The conversations weren’t nuanced and very checklist-like. If you present sex for a woman to check off on her “Good Wife Duty List” that takes the sexy out of it!
But finding resources and a circle of like-minded married Christian women who know their sexual agency is both powerful and helpful. Women who are transparent - and trustworthy - having intimate conversations with their sisters can be safe places for fellow wives. They can also mentor those who desire to be married, preparing them for what's ahead. Another bonus? Wives who discuss the struggles and obstacles when it comes to sex lets others realize they aren't alone. This is why we’re having a conversation that I wish I would’ve heard during my younger years.
Enter in Kimberly Stutson, a Certified Sexuality Coach. Kimberly, who got her start as a Bedroom Kandi consultant, now coaches couples and individuals, plus leads marriage retreats in various churches.
Yes, you read that right. In the church.
Listen in as Kimberly discusses misconceptions about marital aids/products, the biggest obstacles to women not achieving orgasm, the importance of communication about sex with your spouse and much more. This conversation is filled with laughter but also real concerns women – and even men – face when it comes to their sex life with their spouse. Kimberly addresses what I call some “for real, for real” sex stuff. If you are faint at heart or a super saint who shuns a little naughtiness – even with your spouse- you may want to sit this one out.
I say this in love. If not, lean in and glean in #MarriedAF (And Faithful) Part 2: Sexology & the Saints, with Kimberly Stutson.
**Mature/adult content advisory. No profanity or anything but definitely rated M.**
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