Hard To Swallow

About Hard To Swallow

Hard to Swallow with Joshua Palmer Welcome to Hard to Swallow—a raw, real, and refreshingly honest podcast where faith meets identity, truth meets storytelling, and healing meets humor. Hosted by Joshua “Joshie” Palmer, this show dives into the unfiltered experiences of growing up in the church while secretly navigating queerness, only to come out on the other side—literally. From singing in youth group to leading worship, to coming out as gay in the middle of ministry, Joshie brings his full story to the mic: the heartbreak, the hope, and the hilarious dating misadventures. Each week, expect soul-filled storytelling, deep dives into LGBTQ+ faith journeys, pop culture moments, current events, messy dating stories, and whatever else life throws our way—all served with humor, heart, and hard-won wisdom. Whether you’re driving, walking, or crying in the shower (no judgment), this podcast is your virtual warm hug. It's for anyone who’s been told they had to choose between God and authenticity. Spoiler alert: you don’t. Because some stories may be hard to swallow… but they just might be the ones that save us.

Publisher

Joshua Palmer

Category

religion & spirituality · society & culture

Language

en

Explicit

Yes

First episode

16 Jul 2025

Latest episode

9 Sept 2025

Latest episodes

8 episodes in the feed.

1. 

   9 Sept 2025

   Catching Flights, Fall Feels, and a Reality Check

   🎙️ Episode 8: Catching Flights, Fall Feels, and a Reality Check After a 3-week break, your boy is back, and we’ve got a lot to catch up on. In this episode of Hard to Swallow, I’m recapping everything from my trip to Denver, experiencing one of my favorite artists live at the iconic Red Rocks, spooky movie nights, and the full fall energy shift that's in the air. 🍂 But we’re not just vibing—we’re growing. I’m also sharing a recent moment where I had to take full ownership of my actions. It stung, but it was necessary. This episode is about reflection, realness, and that uncomfortable but powerful process of learning and doing better. If you've ever had to sit with your own accountability, or you’re just here for the fall vibes and life catch-ups, you’re in the right place. Some stories may be hard to swallow… but they just might be the ones that save.

2. 

   12 Aug 2025

   Confidence Is the New Sexy

   In this episode of Hard to Swallow, we’re talking all things confidence, and not the kind you fake for Instagram. I’m diving into what it means to walk into a room fully owning your energy, your truth, and your presence. Because let’s be real: confidence is sexy, and it’s powerful. But it’s not about loud outfits or loud personalities, it’s about doing the soul work to feel safe and strong in who you are, even when no one’s watching. I’m also breaking down the difference between confidence and cockiness (yes, there’s a line) and sharing some of the ways I’ve learned to stop shrinking and start shining, without waiting for perfection. If you’ve ever struggled with insecurity, comparison, or feeling like you have to be someone else to be seen... this one’s for you. Some stories may be hard to swallow… but they just might be the ones that save.

3. 

   5 Aug 2025

   Cousin Energy Only

   In this feel-good episode of Hard to Swallow, I’m joined by my cousin and lifelong partner in crime, Gabby, or as I like to call him, my brother from another mother. We’ve been side-by-side since diapers, and today, we’re bringing all that cousin energy straight to your ears. We’re keeping it light this week, laughing through memories of growing up in the same wild, church-filled, Kool-Aid-soaked childhood. We also get real about modern dating (yes, including the time I thought my boyfriend could see spirits 👀) and our shared weight loss journeys that taught us more than just how to count calories. Expect laughs, a few hard to swallow truths, and a whole lot of love. Some stories may be hard to swallow… but they just might be the ones that save.

4. 

   29 Jul 2025

   Letting Go of What No Longer Serves You

   We’ve all been there, clinging to relationships, jobs, friendships, or dreams that deep down, we know aren’t working. In this episode, I’m getting real about the emotional toll of forcing things to happen that were never meant to be. From personal stories to honest conversations with friends, I’m talking about the moments we ignore the signs, the red flags, the gut feelings, because we’re chasing the version of a dream we built in our heads. Letting go can feel like loss. But what if it’s actually the beginning of something better? What if peace, alignment, and joy are on the other side of your release? This one’s a heart-check for anyone stuck in a cycle of “making it work” when all the signs say “let it go.” Some stories may be hard to swallow… but they just might be the ones that save.

5. 

   22 Jul 2025

   "My Boss Found Out I Started a Podcast"

   This week, I’m keeping it real about two very different—but very relatable—things: ghosting and guilt. First, the oops moment—when my incredible boss (yes, that Amy Porterfield (https://www.amyporterfield.com/marketing-strategy-podcast/)) found out I launched this podcast... and I forgot to tell her. The guilt? Real. The imposter syndrome? Also very real. Then, we dive into something I think we’ve all dealt with: ghosting. Whether you’ve been ghosted or done the ghosting, this episode is a loving call-out to start showing up with more honesty and clarity in how we connect—and how we let go. From nervous launches to messy dating, this episode is about learning to use your voice, even when it's scary. Some stories may be hard to swallow... but they just might be the ones that save us.

6. 

   18 Jul 2025

   "Still Doesn't Mean Stuck"

   In this episode, Josh gets real about what it means to sit in stillness—and why being alone doesn’t always mean being lonely. He opens up about post-launch nerves, imposter syndrome, and the messy but beautiful process of just doing the thing, scared or not. Plus, we sprinkle in some pop culture spice: A wild CEO affair that allegedly went down at a Coldplay concert 👀 Tomorrowland’s mainstage literally going up in flames just days before opening 🔥 Whether you’re healing, hiding, or halfway to your next breakthrough, this one’s for you. Come for the honesty, stay for the laughs—and leave with a little more courage to be with yourself.

7. 

   16 Jul 2025

   "The Mask We Wear"

   In this deeply personal episode, Josh unpacks the layers of a life lived in hiding. From his early years of seeking acceptance in the church to suppressing his identity to avoid losing the only community he had, this episode tells the story of a mask worn for survival—and what it took to finally take it off. Joshie shares how being “found out” led to therapy, how church leadership tried to redirect him to an anti-gay retreat, and the unforgettable night he came out to his girlfriend in the pouring rain. He opens up about the fallout from ministry, the emotional toll of shame, and the grace-filled moment when he came out to his mom while recovering from surgery. Also in this episode: Jurassic World fangirling, summer surgery recovery, and a quick drag of app-based dating. Takeaways: Wearing a mask to belong will eventually cost you your joy. Love doesn’t begin when you’re perfect—it begins when you’re real. Your story is sacred, even if it’s messy.

8. 

   16 Jul 2025

   "Uncovering the Truth: Faith, Identity and the First Cut" (Pilot Episode)

   In this powerful premiere episode of Hard to Swallow, host Joshua “Joshie” Palmer invites listeners into his deeply personal journey—from growing up immersed in the church to coming out at 27 and rebuilding life, love, and faith on his own terms. Fresh out of surgery and full of reflection, Joshie shares how ministry once became a mask, how the LGBTQ+ community saved his spirit, and how dating in your late 30s can be equal parts hilarious and exhausting. From kickball fields to dating apps to pop culture obsessions like Labubu and K-pop Demon Hunters, this episode sets the tone for a podcast that is as real as it is relatable. Whether you’re in the closet, out and proud, deconstructing faith, or just here for the stories—this one’s for you. Takeaways: * You don’t have to choose between faith and identity * App dating is chaos (and we all know it) * You are worthy of joy, community, and love 🎧 Subscribe now for weekly episodes that’ll make you laugh, cry, reflect—and maybe feel like you just got a virtual warm hug.

Reach and audience

Public platform figures. Ratings count people who left a rating, not total listeners.

YouTube views

3,653

Score snapshot 15 Sept 2025

Apple Podcasts (US)

4.7 / 5

13 ratings

Podcast Authority Score: 31 / 100

A composite of feed quality, social presence, YouTube performance and engagement. Read the methodology.

Quality

35

Social presence

0

YouTube

68

Engagement

0

Contact Hard To Swallow

Guest appearances

Books guests

Based on episode analysis; this does not confirm that the show is currently accepting guests.