Welcome to Having Had a Spiritual Awakening, the podcast by and for those on the profound journey of Twelve-Step recovery. If you’ve diligently worked the Steps – whether in Alcoholics Anonymous (AA), Narcotics Anonymous (NA), Al-Anon Family Groups, Marijuana Anonymous (MA), or other Twelve-Step fellowships – and experienced that transformative ”psychic change” – that fundamental shift in your perception and reaction to life – this podcast is for you.
We delve into the spiritual awakening described in the Twelfth Step, exploring what it truly means to be relieved of the compulsion and obsession that once held us captive. This isn’t about theory; it’s about the lived experience of a new state of consciousness and being that results from taking rigorous action through the Steps.
Join us as we share stories, insights, and reflections on the practical application of spiritual principles in our daily lives, regardless of your specific fellowship. From navigating newfound freedom to embracing the ongoing process of growth, Having Had a Spiritual Awakening provides a space for fellowship, understanding, and the continuing exploration of a life transformed. Tune in to connect with others who are walking this path, demonstrating that a spiritual awakening is not just a moment, but a new way of living.
Written and Produced by Suzanne Garcia Pino & Sarah Grobel Bolstad
Music: I’ll Tell You - Sarah Grobel Bolstad and Ian Ford
The Fourth D Club, Missoula, MT - https://www.4thdmissoula.org
In this episode of Having Had a Spiritual Awakening, Sarah and Suzanne sit down with Jessica to discuss what it was like going through her first year of recovery. She reflects on the not-uncommon high school experience of partying on the weekends and attending her school’s anti-drug club during the week. Later in life, despite what she learned in that anti-drug club, Jessica found herself able to keep a job even as her addiction mounted—all of which only made it more confusing and harder to come to terms with the fact that she had a problem. We touch on the trauma of losing a loved one early in life as an entry point into using, and laugh about how several rehab stints scattered throughout the country left her unexpectedly well-traveled by her thirties.
The Fourth D Club would like to thank Glacier Wealth Management, a Missoula- and Kalispell-based firm focused on helping individuals, families, and businesses navigate their financial futures. Their team offers services including comprehensive financial planning, investment management, tax and estate planning, health insurance, general insurance guidelines, and tax-free retirement strategies. What sets them apart is their commitment to building lasting relationships and treating clients like family- to help them move forward with confidence.
Hosted & Written by Suzanne Garcia Pino
Co-Hosted & Produced by Sarah B.
Music: I'll Tell You by Sarah Grobel & Ian Ford
Support the 4th D Club through the Freedom Circle to keep a safe, drug- and alcohol-free space. Learn more: The Fourth D Club, Missoula, MT, 4thdmissoula.org
Fourth D Club's Annual Luncheon Event: Reserve a Seat
18 Jun 2026
We Talk to Don
In this episode of Having Had a Spiritual Awakening, Sarah and Suzanne sit down with Don R. who shares what it was like getting clean in a small Montana town, and how he found a way to build a strong foundation in recovery despite limited resources. We also talk about one of recovery's more challenging adventures—dating. Don reflects on what it was like to navigate relationships for the first time under the guidance of a trusted sponsor and the lessons he learned along the way.
Today, Don serves as the Executive Director of NARSS (Never Alone Recovery Support Services), a thriving, life-saving Recovery Community Center in Ronan, Montana for individuals and families affected by addiction. Together they explore why long-term, community-based recovery matters and how ongoing connection and support are essential.
Hosted & Written by Suzanne Garcia Pino
Co-Hosted & Produced by Sarah Grobel Bolstad
Music: I'll Tell You by Sarah Grobel Bolstad & Ian Ford
narssmontana.org
Support the 4th D Club through the Freedom Circle to keep a safe, drug- and alcohol-free space. Learn more: The Fourth D Club, Missoula, MT, 4thdmissoula.org
Serenity Scramble: July 10, 2026: Register Here
21 Apr 2026
We Talk to Kristal & Matt
What happens after you get sober… and your mind doesn’t?
In this episode, Suzanne and Sarah sit down with Kristal and Matt to talk about when you’ve got some sober time under your belt, but your obsessive nature starts popping up in new ways, like a relentless game of whac-a-mole.
From control and perfectionism to new flavors of ego and fear, the conversation explores how character defects sometimes don’t disappear—they just change. And more importantly, what we can actually do about it.
Hosted & Written by Suzanne Garcia Pino
Co-Hosted & Produced by Sarah Grobel Bolstad
Music: I'll Tell You by Sarah Grobel Bolstad & Ian Ford
A candid, low-key conversation about what happens after the last substance: obsession, loneliness, and the surprising spiritual work of recovery.
Support the 4th D Club through the Freedom Circle to keep a safe, drug- and alcohol-free space. Learn more: The Fourth D Club, Missoula, MT, www.4thdmissoula.org
15 Mar 2026
We Talk to Dawn
In this episode of Having Had A Spiritual Awakening, Suzanne and Sarah sit down with Dawn. Dawn speaks about the deep gratitude for what she has survived, a gratitude that has come from her lived experience, and how her past has shaped her ability to show up for others today. The episode becomes a meditation on survival itself—how a spiritual awakening can come from understanding that recovery is about transformation, not perfection.
The Fourth D Club, Missoula, MT, www.4thdmissoula.org
Hosted & Written by Suzanne Garcia Pino
Co-Hosted & Produced by Sarah Grobel Bolstad
Music: I'll Tell You by Sarah Grobel Bolstad & Ian Ford
14 Feb 2026
We Talk to Irish
Do all addicts in recovery become nerds? Or were we, in our using days, simply suppressing our supernatural curiosity and next-level research skills?
Suzanne and Sarah sit down with their guest, Irish, to explore these questions and more. Tune in to hear Irish casually drop one life-changing metaphor after another — and to discover what might actually be hiding beneath the surface of addiction and recovery.
The Fourth D Club, Missoula, MT, www.4thdmissoula.org
Hosted & Written by Suzanne Garcia Pino
Co-Hosted & Produced by Sarah Grobel Bolstad
Music: I'll Tell You by Sarah Grobel Bolstad & Ian Ford
20 Jan 2026
We Talk to Gaaby
Suzanne and Sarah do their best to keep up with Gaaby, who has 29 years of recovery in Al-Anon. Gaaby shares what life was like when her solution was trying to control everything and everyone around her, how she found her way into recovery, and how—after nearly three decades of working a program—she sticks around to deepen her practice of acceptance because, as she says, “reality is where the power lives.”
The Fourth D Club, Missoula, MT, www.4thdmissoula.org
Hosted & Written by Suzanne Garcia Pino
Co-Hosted & Produced by Sarah Grobel Bolstad
Music: I'll Tell You by Sarah Grobel Bolstad & Ian Ford
3 Dec 2025
We Talk to Stephen
In this episode of Having Had a Spiritual Awakening, we talk with Stephen Ferguson, Executive Director of Crosswinds Recovery, about what constitutes “real” trauma and why comparing levels of trauma can hinder healing. Stephen shares insights from his work and experience in recovery. Stephen, Suzanne and Sarah consider whether spiritual awakenings are inherently turbulent, why transformation often feels disorienting, and the paradox of surrender; how giving up control can sometimes become another attempt to hold onto it.
The Fourth D Club, Missoula, MT, www.4thdmissoula.org
Hosted & Written by Suzanne Garcia Pino
Co-Hosted & Produced by Sarah Grobel Bolstad
Music: I'll Tell You by Sarah Grobel Bolstad & Ian Ford
17 Oct 2025
We Talk to Zac
Suzanne and Sarah talk with Zac C. about how spiritual awakenings sometimes happen in reflection rather than in real time—and sometimes they happen right in front of the TV, while watching Wheel of Fortune. Zac also shares about the important and inspiring work his recovery nonprofit, Beautiful Minds Recovery (www.beautifulmindsrecovery.com), is doing to provide peer support training within the community.
In the last ten minutes, Suzanne and Sarah discuss, with instructor Kathy Mangan, the mindfulness meditation classes that Red Willow Learning Center (www.redwillowlearning.org) will soon be offering at the Fourth D Club, free of charge. Everyone will benefit, and everyone is welcome!
The Fourth D Club, Missoula, MT, www.4thdmissoula.org
Hosted & Written by Suzanne Garcia Pino
Co-Hosted & Produced by Sarah Grobel Bolstad
Music: I'll Tell You by Sarah Grobel Bolstad & Ian Ford
28 Sept 2025
We Talk to Justin
Is it possible to be constitutionally incapable of being honest? Suzanne and Sarah sit down with Justin D. to unpack how AA and NA answer this question. Justin shares practical pro-tips for staying clean and sober, along with fascinating observations he made just a year into recovery—after being hit by a car and facing the challenge of healing without pain prescriptions. Justin also shares how this only became possible when he became willing to ditch any lingering victim mentality.
The Fourth D Club, Missoula, MT, www.4thdmissoula.org
Hosted & Written by Suzanne Garcia Pino
Co-Hosted & Produced by Sarah Grobel Bolstad
Music: I'll Tell You by Sarah Grobel Bolstad & Ian Ford
19 Aug 2025
We Talk to Kate
Suzanne and Sarah talk with Kate L. about the dreaded “outside topics” and wonder if, in the end, everything is an outside topic. They discuss black-and-white thinking, what “economic insecurity” might mean in the Ninth Step promises, and Kate’s love of wild AA meetings.
The Fourth D Club, Missoula, MT, www.4thdmissoula.org
Hosted & Written by Suzanne Garcia Pino
Co-Hosted & Produced by Sarah Grobel Bolstad
Music: I'll Tell You by Sarah Grobel Bolstad & Ian Ford
30 Jul 2025
We Talk to Jay
Suzanne and Sarah talk to Jay about how she is learning how to not carry the intensity of her addiction into sobriety, how self abandonment changes in recovery, and the time she tried to solve her Adderall-caused back problems by jerry rigging a stand up desk and a phone call to her father at 3 AM.
Hosted & Written by Suzanne Garcia Pino
Hosted & Produced by Sarah Grobel Bolstad
Music: I'll Tell You by Sarah Grobel Bolstad & Ian Ford
The Fourth D Club, Missoula, MT, 4thdmissoula.org
1 Jul 2025
We Talk to Dan
Suzanne, Dan, and Sarah talk about hitting a sufficient bottom, choosing to surrender, and the tough– yet often fascinating– work of recovering from alcoholism.
Written and Produced by Suzanne Garcia Pino & Sarah Grobel Bolstad
Music: I’ll Tell You - Sarah Grobel Bolstad & Ian Ford
The Fourth D Club, Missoula, MT - https://www.4thdmissoula.org
6 Jun 2025
Spiritual Awakenings Can Happen Anywhere
Written and Produced by Suzanne Garcia Pino & Sarah Grobel Bolstad
Music: I’ll Tell You - Sarah Grobel Bolstad & Ian Ford
The Fourth D Club, Missoula, MT - https://www.4thdmissoula.org
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