- 10
- Episodes
- 4
- Ratings
- 2025
- First episode
About How to Tell Someone
A soft spot in this hard world for true stories about communicating the big stuff. tonyapieske.substack.com (https://tonyapieske.substack.com?utm_medium=podcast)
- Publisher
- Tonya Pieske
- Category
- society & culture · society & culture
- Language
- en
- Explicit
- Yes
- First episode
- 18 Feb 2025
- Latest episode
- 16 Mar 2026
Latest episodes
10 episodes in the feed.
16 Mar 2026
Three Zeros?!
You can find the Question Wheel at howtotellsomeone.com/resources (https://www.howtotellsomeone.com/resources) Give it a spin and send your written answer to howtotellsomeone@gmail.com (mailto:howtotellsomeone@gmail.com) or use the contact form (linked in the website footer) CREDITS: Created, produced, written, and edited by: Tonya Pieske All music composed and performed by: Hexteria Main theme: “The Star” by Hexteria Discover more music: www.hexteriamusic.com (http://www.hexteriamusic.com) or any major streaming platform CONNECT WITH US: How to Tell Someone isn’t on social media by design. Please follow and engage here instead: Website: howtotellsomeone.com (http://howtotellsomeone.com) (merch and more) Substack: tonyapieske.substack.com (http://tonyapieske.substack.com) (free bonus, BTS, and companion content) YouTube: www.youtube.com/@HowtoTellSomeone (http://www.youtube.com/@HowtoTellSomeone) Email: howtotellsomeone@gmail.com (mailto:howtotellsomeone@gmail.com) Available on all major streaming platforms This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit tonyapieske.substack.com (https://tonyapieske.substack.com?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_1)
21 Feb 2026
Bonus Episode: The Question Wheel
SHARE YOUR STORY: You can find the Question Wheel at howtotellsomeone.com/resources (https://www.howtotellsomeone.com/resources) Give it a spin and send your written answer to howtotellsomeone@gmail.com CREDITS: Created, produced, written, and edited by: Tonya Pieske All music composed and performed by: Hexteria Main theme: “The Star” by Hexteria Discover more music: www.hexteriamusic.com (http://www.hexteriamusic.com) or any major streaming platform CONNECT WITH US: How to Tell Someone isn’t on social media by design. Please follow and engage here instead: Website: howtotellsomeone.com (http://howtotellsomeone.com) (merch and more) Substack: tonyapieske.substack.com (http://tonyapieske.substack.com) (free bonus, BTS, and companion content) YouTube: www.youtube.com/@HowtoTellSomeone (http://www.youtube.com/@HowtoTellSomeone) Email: howtotellsomeone@gmail.com (mailto:howtotellsomeone@gmail.com) Available on all major streaming platforms This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit tonyapieske.substack.com (https://tonyapieske.substack.com?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_1)
12 Jan 2026
Your Dad is Dying
“The way she said it made it feel like I was the last one to understand because I just didn’t know what this word meant. I didn’t understand he was dying…It was so weird to feel like you missed something, and that thing is that you’re going to lose the person that means everything to you….It was like the world was ripped out from under me and I’ve been falling ever since.” Key topics include losing a parent at a young age, the impact of death and grief on family dynamics, and navigating life with a parent struggling with substance abuse. CONTENT WARNINGS: - Grief, death, and loss - Substance abuse - Mention of sexual assault CONNECT WITH LINDSEY: Learn more about Lindsey Strong’s tattoo work and booking info by following her on Instagram @lindseydreadfuls https://www.instagram.com/lindseydreadfuls/ (https://www.instagram.com/lindseydreadfuls/) CREDITS: Created, produced, written, and edited by: Tonya Pieske All music composed and performed by: Hexteria Main theme: “The Star” by Hexteria Discover more music: www.hexteriamusic.com (http://www.hexteriamusic.com) or any major streaming platform CONNECT WITH US: How to Tell Someone isn’t on social media by design. Please follow and engage here instead: Website: howtotellsomeone.com (http://howtotellsomeone.com) (merch and more) Substack: tonyapieske.substack.com (http://tonyapieske.substack.com) (free bonus, BTS, and companion content) YouTube: www.youtube.com/@HowtoTellSomeone (http://www.youtube.com/@HowtoTellSomeone) Email: howtotellsomeone@gmail.com (mailto:howtotellsomeone@gmail.com) Available on all major streaming platforms This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit tonyapieske.substack.com (https://tonyapieske.substack.com?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_1)
12 Jan 2026
Your Partner is Trans
“There are ways you can mess up without even meaning to, and you don’t figure that out until it happens. And there’s only so much you can do to prepare and only so much you can do to educate yourself. And it’s also a very emotional thing. I think it was important to tell a story rather than to use terminology.” Key topics include queer relationships, supporting and advocating through gender transition, and relationship and family dynamics. CONTENT WARNINGS: - References to misgendering and misuse of pronouns - Brief mention of death and grief RESOURCES: The Trevor Project: https://www.thetrevorproject.org/ (https://www.thetrevorproject.org/) 24/7 crisis support for LGBTQ+ youth and young adults via text, chat, or phone. Trans Lifeline: https://translifeline.org/ (https://translifeline.org/) A peer-run hotline staffed entirely by trans people for trans people. They also offer name-change microgrants. PFLAG: https://pflag.org/ (https://pflag.org/) Support, education, and community for families, partners, and allies. GLAAD — Transgender FAQ: https://www.glaad.org/transgender/transfaq (https://www.glaad.org/transgender/transfaq) Clear, accessible explanations of terminology and respectful language. National Center for Transgender Equality (NCTE): https://transequality.org/ (https://transequality.org/) Policy, rights information, and practical resources for navigating documentation changes. Gender Spectrum – Healthy Relationships: https://genderspectrum.org/ (https://genderspectrum.org/) Guidance on communication, identity, and navigating relationship changes. OurPath (formerly Straight Spouse Network): https://ourpath.org/ (https://ourpath.org/) Peer support for partners navigating shifts in understanding around gender and orientation. Transgender Law Center (TLC): https://transgenderlawcenter.org/ (https://transgenderlawcenter.org/) The largest trans-led civil rights organization in the U.S. offering legal support, advocacy, and community-led solutions. Black LGBTQIA+ Migrant Project (BLMP): https://blmp.org/ (https://blmp.org/) A Black trans- and queer-led collective supporting Black LGBTQ+ migrants through community building, organizing, and mutual aid. Human Rights Campaign (HRC) — Coming Out as Transgender: https://www.hrc.org/resources/coming-out-as-transgender (https://www.hrc.org/resources/coming-out-as-transgender) A practical, accessible guide for those navigating disclosure or supporting someone who is. PFLAG — Transgender Allies Guide: https://pflag.org/allies (https://pflag.org/allies) Straightforward, beginner-friendly guidance for anyone wanting to support a trans loved one with respect and care. CREDITS: Created, produced, written, and edited by: Tonya Pieske All music composed and performed by: Hexteria Main theme: “The Star” by Hexteria Discover more music: www.hexteriamusic.com (http://www.hexteriamusic.com) or any major streaming platform CONNECT WITH US: How to Tell Someone isn’t on social media by design. Please follow and engage here instead: Website: howtotellsomeone.com (http://howtotellsomeone.com) (merch and more) Substack: tonyapieske.substack.com (http://tonyapieske.substack.com) (free bonus, BTS, and companion content) YouTube: www.youtube.com/@HowtoTellSomeone (http://www.youtube.com/@HowtoTellSomeone) Email: howtotellsomeone@gmail.com (mailto:howtotellsomeone@gmail.com) Available on all major streaming platforms This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit tonyapieske.substack.com (https://tonyapieske.substack.com?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_1)
12 Jan 2026
You're Healing Generational Trauma
“I just expected that because I knew what was wrong with my childhood, that I would be able to solve what was wrong with their childhoods. But I couldn’t. Everything I was trying to give my kids was aspirational…I didn’t understand it…this would have worked for me, why isn’t it working for you?” “It became so much less about needing to remember everything that my mother had done to hurt me, and it became so much more about developing the medicine that would heal the relationship with my mother so that I could pass the recipe on…I can save him this work…by doing an imperfect job.” Key topics include parenting at a young age, estrangement, multigenerational trauma, and learning how to parent without healthy examples. CONTENT WARNINGS: - Blood or bodily injury - Child abuse or neglect - Emotional abuse - Explicit language - Intimate partner violence - Mental illness - Religious trauma CREDITS: Created, produced, written, and edited by: Tonya Pieske All music composed and performed by: Hexteria Main theme: “The Star” by Hexteria Discover more music: www.hexteriamusic.com (http://www.hexteriamusic.com) or any major streaming platform CONNECT WITH US: How to Tell Someone isn’t on social media by design. Please follow and engage here instead: Website: howtotellsomeone.com (http://howtotellsomeone.com) (merch and more) Substack: tonyapieske.substack.com (http://tonyapieske.substack.com) (free bonus, BTS, and companion content) YouTube: www.youtube.com/@HowtoTellSomeone (http://www.youtube.com/@HowtoTellSomeone) Email: howtotellsomeone@gmail.com (mailto:howtotellsomeone@gmail.com) Available on all major streaming platforms This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit tonyapieske.substack.com (https://tonyapieske.substack.com?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_1)
12 Jan 2026
You're Making a Mistake
"Having to set boundaries with, and have difficult discussions with your one remaining parent is really hard…She’s my mom, and she’s my only mom, and what happens if I’m suddenly at odds with her?” “What are my mom’s golden years going to look like? Are they going to be golden at all if she’s stuck with this guy?” Key topics include toxic relationships, parent-child dynamics, parental loss, and setting relationship boundaries. CONTENT WARNINGS: - Child abuse or neglect - Emotional abuse - Grief, death, and loss - Addiction or substance abuse CREDITS: Created, produced, written, and edited by: Tonya Pieske All music composed and performed by: Hexteria Main theme: “The Star” by Hexteria Discover more music: www.hexteriamusic.com (http://www.hexteriamusic.com) or any major streaming platform CONNECT WITH US: How to Tell Someone isn’t on social media by design. Please follow and engage here instead: Website: howtotellsomeone.com (http://howtotellsomeone.com) Substack: tonyapieske.substack.com (http://tonyapieske.substack.com) (free bonus, BTS, and companion content) YouTube: www.youtube.com/@HowtoTellSomeone (http://www.youtube.com/@HowtoTellSomeone) Email: howtotellsomeone@gmail.com (mailto:howtotellsomeone@gmail.com) Available on all major streaming platforms This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit tonyapieske.substack.com (https://tonyapieske.substack.com?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_1)
12 Jan 2026
Your Dad is Dead
“It was the first time I’d ever known anyone that had died, and it was my dad. When you’re seven, you don’t even have the vocabulary or the reference points to start navigating that mentally. So, it’s just pure shock.” “One of the things I immediately started reflecting on was how could this have been avoided?…And this is really when the guilt came on…So now on top of it all, it’s my fault.” Key topics include losing a parent at a young age, navigating death and grief without mental health support, and living with an autoimmune disease. CONTENT WARNINGS: - Grief, death, and loss - Mentions of substance abuse CREDITS: Created, produced, written, and edited by: Tonya Pieske All music composed and performed by: Hexteria Main theme: “The Star” by Hexteria Discover more music: www.hexteriamusic.com (http://www.hexteriamusic.com) or any major streaming platform CONNECT WITH US: How to Tell Someone isn’t on social media by design. Please follow and engage here instead: Website: howtotellsomeone.com (http://howtotellsomeone.com) (merch and more) Substack: tonyapieske.substack.com (http://tonyapieske.substack.com) (free bonus, BTS, and companion content) YouTube: www.youtube.com/@HowtoTellSomeone (http://www.youtube.com/@HowtoTellSomeone) Email: howtotellsomeone@gmail.com (mailto:howtotellsomeone@gmail.com) Available on all major streaming platforms This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit tonyapieske.substack.com (https://tonyapieske.substack.com?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_1)
12 Jan 2026
Your Wedding is Canceled
"Talking it out with anybody did not help, and to some degree it can’t. I’m the only one who can decide what this will mean for me or what the next best step is. Even my therapist was like, you're just going to have to decide what is most important to you.” “People are really terrified of this and they will go through their whole lives being miserable in so many just to say that they are not alone. That’s kind of where I found myself.” Key topics include breakups, queerness and navigating bisexuality in straight monogamous relationships, and mental illness. CONTENT WARNINGS: - Depression and mental illness - Mentions of suicidal ideation CONNECT WITH ANNALISE: Follow Annalise on Instagram to stay in the loop about where they’re performing stand-up @bad_bananaz (https://www.instagram.com/bad_bananaz/) CREDITS: Created, produced, written, and edited by: Tonya Pieske All music composed and performed by: Hexteria Main theme: “The Star” by Hexteria Discover more music: www.hexteriamusic.com (http://www.hexteriamusic.com) or any major streaming platform CONNECT WITH US: How to Tell Someone isn’t on social media by design. Please follow and engage here instead: Website: howtotellsomeone.com (http://howtotellsomeone.com) (merch and more) Substack: tonyapieske.substack.com (http://tonyapieske.substack.com) (free bonus, BTS, and companion content) YouTube: www.youtube.com/@HowtoTellSomeone (http://www.youtube.com/@HowtoTellSomeone) Email: howtotellsomeone@gmail.com (mailto:howtotellsomeone@gmail.com) Available on all major streaming platforms This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit tonyapieske.substack.com (https://tonyapieske.substack.com?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_1)
12 Jan 2026
You Saved Your Own Life
“It was the very first time I remember my adoptive mother looking at me with pity and sadness. And she cried. And I remember being surprised that she could have those feelings about me. She hugged me and she asked me why I never told her…of course I didn’t tell you, you are the scariest person in the world to me. It was so mind boggling to me that she would be wondering why I wouldn’t share that with her sooner.” Key topics include physical and emotional child abuse, child sexual assault, interracial adoption, and trauma recovery. CONTENT WARNINGS: - Descriptions of physical and emotional child abuse - Mentions of child sexual abuse - Descriptions of child sexual assault - Racial trauma - Addiction or substance abuse - Mentions of self-harm RESOURCES: Enough Abuse - Resources for Survivors of Child Sexual Abuse: https://enoughabuse.org/get-help/survivor-support/ (https://enoughabuse.org/get-help/survivor-support/) A helpful list of resources for adults who have experienced childhood sexual abuse and are seeking support. CREDITS: Created, produced, written, and edited by: Tonya Pieske All music composed and performed by: Hexteria Main theme: “The Star” by Hexteria Discover more music: www.hexteriamusic.com (http://www.hexteriamusic.com) or any major streaming platform CONNECT WITH US: How to Tell Someone isn’t on social media by design. Please follow and engage here instead: Website: howtotellsomeone.com (http://howtotellsomeone.com) (merch and more) Substack: tonyapieske.substack.com (http://tonyapieske.substack.com) (free bonus, BTS, and companion content) YouTube: www.youtube.com/@HowtoTellSomeone (http://www.youtube.com/@HowtoTellSomeone) Email: howtotellsomeone@gmail.com (mailto:howtotellsomeone@gmail.com) Available on all major streaming platforms This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit tonyapieske.substack.com (https://tonyapieske.substack.com?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_1)
18 Feb 2025
How to Tell Someone Trailer
Welcome to How to Tell Someone, a soft spot in this hard world for true, vulnerable stories about communicating the big stuff. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit tonyapieske.substack.com (https://tonyapieske.substack.com?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_1)
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