WANTED: Discreet, dysfunctional pair of millennials seek open-minded audience for casual encounters and shenanigans. Gibbs is an engaged academic with a tenuous grip on her sanity. Her hobbies include wedding planning, whittling, weightlifting, and ranting. Shah is an unattached artist with a compromised moral compass. His hobbies include anything toxic you can think of. We are open to anyone over the age of 18 who won’t mind sharing us with their friends (and family, if that’s what you’re into). Flexibility is a plus (physically or ethically). Must be comfortable with: explicit language, hysteria, chest hair, arts and crafts, primates, cosplay and cross dressing. Sound like your type of party? Then don't be shy... we're only creepy sometimes.
In this episode, the lads kick things off with one of Gibbs' classic icebreakers and compare themselves with various animals. Next, they dive into the world of personality types, focusing on the Myers-Briggs test. Similar to their episode about astrology, they have A LOT of overlap - which is something that Gibbs finds unnerving and Shah finds hilarious.
Together, they explore how their personality types show up in their daily lives, from their quirks to how they handle challenges to how their Myers-Briggs types approach friendships and romantic relationships.
Finally, they explore the Enneagram system and its nine distinct types, bringing another layer to understanding their personality types - this time with a focus on how they approach the workplace.
Until next time, go fuck off!
28 Feb 2024
S2E9 | Astrology and AO3
Shah would like to remind you that if anyone writes smutty fanfiction about him and Gibbs, he’ll read it on air. Gibbs would like to remind you that she’ll disembowel anyone who does that.
Join Gibbs and Shah as they celebrate besting their first season's episode count with a comic, cosmic discussion about their astrological signs. Gibbs, a proud Aries, questions her sign’s proclaimed bravery. Shah, a skeptical Aquarius, casts doubt on his sign’s proclivity to advocate for underdogs.
Enjoy the kind of roasting you can only get from friends as close and idiotic as these two as they scrutinize each other’s charts and explore their compatibility with each other and Gibbs’ fiancé. Grab your headphones and prepare for some celestial shade! (do people still say “throwing shade?”)
6 Jan 2024
S2E8 | F**k Flintstones Vitamins
New year, same them.
So Gibbs decided to bring some of her real-life awkward icebreakers to the podcast. Hope you like that bit because she has A LOT more where it came from. In this episode, Shah confronts Gibbs about her smoking habit, after which Gibbs confronts Shah about his inability to walk across a room without tripping over his feet. How either of them lived this long is anyone's guess, but since they're here, they decide to have a talk about the physical wellness struggles that came with their unexpected longevity.
Shah reveals that he's still bitter about being cut from his high school's basketball team. Gibbs reveals why she removed her fiancé as a beneficiary of her life insurance policy.
From a somewhat pretentious talk about working out, to an unexpectedly disgusting talk about vitamins, to a vaguely disturbing talk about death, the lads finally wrap up this three-episode arc about the body.
16 Oct 2023
S2E7 | Spit on Me, It's Fine
Gibbs drinks breast milk. I just want that to be your takeaway from this.
Welcome back for part two of a three-episode arc on hygiene! This time, your favorite degenerates discuss all the fun intersections of hygiene and sexuality. If you're still listening to this podcast after the LAST episode, then you definitely deserve the insanity that comes out of their mouths in THIS one.
Shah took it upon himself to lead the discussion this time, so don't expect any peer reviewed sources to be cited here. Anywho, this casually uncomfortable conversation starts off with a talk about saliva, then meanders its way to such topics as vomit, lactating, body odor, male AND female ejaculation, period sex, annnnnd all the other fun stuff you were just dying to hear about.
Also, did you know men can get yeast infections?
2 Oct 2023
S2E6 | How Often Do You Shower?
Ever wondered what the link between earwax and body odor is? Yeah, neither did I.
The lads are back with an episode about hygiene! This one was most definitely a Gibbs suggestion and Shah most definitely regrets agreeing to it. Anywho, join them as they march boldly into the world of body maintenance and explore everything from haircare to licking eyeballs. Spoiler alert: Shah thinks Gibbs is gross and Gibbs thinks Shah is a prude. Who is right in this situation? You decide!
Between all the bizarre talk about hand washing, skincare, and deodorant, they actually manage to squeeze in a few interesting facts about the body that make this episode... somewhat redeemable. Somewhat.
30 Jul 2023
S2E5 | So, We're Banned from Tinder
I feel like no one is surprised that these two are banned from Tinder. Anywho, in this episode Shah reveals how he finally got closure with the ex-girlfriend who inspired this entire show... and it's somehow more socially awkward than you are anticipating. Gibbs then tells the story about the times her fiancé tried to breakup with her, and the petty way she reminds him of it to this day.
As they go further down the rabbit hole, the lads discuss breakups and divorce rates and such. Gibbs talks about the unique cast of characters from her dating history - including a heroin addict, a male model, and a pedophile. In case you were wondering what her type is.
Oh, and bonus points if you can guess which TV show Gibbs played a stripper on.
2 Jul 2023
S2E4 | That Time We Almost Killed Spider-Man
Two guesses as to which one of these idiots almost shot a Spider-Man cosplayer. Anywho, episode four starts off with some talk about Gibbs' work party antics and her hidden athletic prowess (that was an exaggeration). From there, the lads discuss a rather nerve-wracking cinema trip and their unconventional self-defense strategies.
Things take a serious turn as they discuss the their two year hiatus... by discuss I mean make glancing mention of it before deflecting and moving onto another topic: the trials and tribulations of sharing living spaces with total strangers. Dishonest landlords, living with in-laws, room hunting on Craigslist... buckle up and enjoy the shenanigans!
11 May 2023
S2E3 | We Are NOT White Supremacists
The lads start the episode discussing Shah’s lack of organizational skills and Gibb’s anger issues. By discussing I mean Gibbs getting angry ABOUT Shah’s lack of organizational skills. After that, they spend some time on a fairly innocent topic: celebrity crushes. What can go wrong, right? Well, after a while they notice that they both lean towards a certain “type” … which leads to the real topic of the episode: racial preferences. Racial slurs in bed, raceplay, and all that fun stuff. Yeah. Thankfully, this is this is their shortest episode ever. It’s also probably gonna be their last episode ever.
10 May 2023
S2E2 | Just Stick It In, I Guess
Gibbs and her fiancé had the “how many people have you slept with” talk. Hilarity ensued. This somehow leads to Shah telling a story about masturbating in closets. The topic of virginity leads to a conversation about ageplay and other “taboo” kinks. This somehow leads to Shah telling a story about ageplay that made me regret taking this job. Consent play, foot fetishes… this is a weird one.
9 May 2023
S2E1 | Don't F**king Touch Me
Gibbs is still supposedly planning her wedding (lol) and Shah is still supposedly single (LOL), so they’re finally back for season two! If you thought they would explain their 2.5-year hiatus, then you are gravely mistaken. Instead, they spend the episode discussing their love languages!
Turns out they’re both touch averse and emotionally damaged. Who would have guessed.
8 May 2023
S1E7 | Sexytime Shenanigans
Quick question: do you keep a list of all the people you've slept with? Asking for a friend. Anywho, Gibbs & Shah spend this episode talking about the fun stuff they get up to in their sex lives. Daddy kinks, candle accidents, making jokes during sex - you get the gist. Shah reveals his signature move for seducing women. Gibbs reveals her signature move for turning on her fiancé. Fair warning: there is an anal sex story in here you'll probably want to skip past.
7 May 2023
S1E6 | Sleep Apnea and Squatty Potties
Don't do drugs. At least, don't do drugs on air.
Unfortunately for Shah, he stops breathing in his sleep. Unfortunately for Gibbs, he wakes up. Gibbs decided to make this an episode about poop so now we have to live with that... I'll admit, it's an interesting conversation, though. Apparently, public schools and Catholic schools both suck at teaching kids how their bodies are supposed to work. Gibbs tries to explain the menstrual cycle. Shah tries to explain erectile dysfunction.
Also, which of these two do you think will outlive the other?
7 May 2023
S1E5 | Grab My Nipples
This episode starts with a story about a guy with a small penis. This episode also ends with a story about a guy with a small penis. Also, Gibbs finally met Shah's mom! To celebrate this moment, the lads take time to discuss the nuances of friendship. Trauma bonding, friends with benefits, and having platonic friends of the opposite sex.
7 May 2023
S1E4 | HR Loves Us
Ah, yes, the age-old question: should you bang coworkers?
The lads reveal how they met and became friends, then discuss dating and sexual harassment in the workplace. This includes a debate about the ethics of blowing your boss behind a dumpster. Also, Shah got a promotion! Gibbs still makes more money, though. This leads to an honest discussion about how money influences dating. Also, guess which one of them got fired for being high at work.
7 May 2023
S1E3 | Flicking the Old Bean
Things you could have lived without knowing: Gibbs prefers to watch porn on her phone and Shah has faked orgasms before. If either of these two are your type then you're in luck, because in this episode they discuss THEIR types. Age preferences, gender preferences, racial preferences - they cover all the bases of their turn ons/offs. Gibbs learns that having sex with animals is, in fact, not legal. Shah tells a story that probably should have been cut out, but they don't pay their editor enough to save them from themselves.
1 May 2023
S1E2 | Character References
The lads are getting up there in age so they open the episode recounting the moments they realized they should actually start acting their age. Neither of them are where they thought they'd be at this point in life, so they reminisce about what they wanted to be when they were kids. Pretty sure they both imply that you should drop out of school. Gibbs makes passing references to drugs, which explains a lot about her. Shah references a less-than-stellar psychological evaluation, which explains a lot about him.
Anyone feel like volunteering to be their character reference on their job applications?
24 Apr 2023
S1E1 | Mischief and Mayhem
The episode that started it all! Also should have been the episode that ended it all but we weren't that lucky.
Anyway, meet Gibbs and Shah! Gibbs is getting married at some indeterminate point in the future and Shah is the chronically single bestie she gave a plus-one. Join the fun and listen to talks about adulting and relationships from two unhinged, chaotic lads who suck at both.
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Apple Podcasts (US)
5.0 / 5
4 ratings
Spotify
5.0 / 5
2 ratings
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