Welcome to Imparting Malarkey, where Laura and Nate discuss the important issues of our time, like which fictional characters would make terrible roommates and whether certain movies are actually overrated. Think of it as hanging out with friends who got distracted from the original topic about twenty minutes ago. It's nerdy, it's ridiculous, and it's basically the conversation you'd overhear at the next table and wish you could join.
One Crime at a Time: Poop Storms & Campaign Platforms
**Trigger warning: graphic discussion of bodily fluids, including diarrhea**
What would you un-invent, and what nonsense would get your vote? Nate and Laura debate driving pet peeves, bad music and a HYROX incident that tests the limits of commitment. Somehow, we leave with questionable life advice.
23 Sept 2026
You Can't Top Assault
A Purge hypothetical, an alien abduction, one very important would-you-rather question, and a luxury pedicure that may have been a misunderstanding of the word “luxury.”
Nate and Laura follow each conversation wherever it goes, which is rarely where anyone expected.
10 Sept 2026
I Believe in Branchular
Laura and Nate have already built a cult, so obviously the next logical step is to diversify. This week, they build their very own MLM.
Meet Branchular, a completely legitimate tree-based business opportunity involving questionable saplings, chakra alignment, increasingly prestigious wood-themed ranks and a downline that really needs to believe harder if they want their trees to grow. Somehow, it also fits disturbingly well into the cult they've already created. Synergy.
From there, they debate the absolute worst superpowers to have, which fictional billionaire they'd rather be, and why the flying cars we were promised as children would probably be a logistical nightmare.
Then Nate asks the question nobody else was willing to: What does asphalt taste like? This leads to chimichurri, Windex, crunchy peanut butter, Laura's childhood relationship with industrial-strength ammonia and some concerning revelations about how both of them may have lost a few brain cells over the years.
Branchular. Flying cars. Club sandwiches. Asphalt. Ammonia.
Just two friends building toward a dystopian future, one episode at a time.
2 Sept 2026
Papyrus is Trash
Laura and Nate generally try not to yuck anyone's yum. This week, they're making some exceptions.
First, they tackle the hobbies they are completely comfortable judging, including Laura's surprisingly passionate case against climbing Mount Everest and Nate's nomination of children's beauty pageants. Along the way, they discover that rich people have somehow managed to make going to space and the bottom of the ocean less cool too.
Then, the return we've all been waiting for: The Jar Jar Binks Of... This time, they're choosing the Jar Jar Binks of fonts, and against all odds, Laura and Nate independently arrive at the exact same answer. Friendship reaffirmed. Podcast justified. It's in the name. Papyrus is Trash.
From there, things wander through Comic Sans, AI-generated community posters, whether Laura and Nate were born in the wrong era, the questionable logistics of cryogenic freezing, the worst songs ever recorded, and eventually the creation of the single worst person either of them could possibly meet.
Mount Everest. Papyrus. Pontoons. Jägerbombs. Cryogenic freezers.
Another highly productive episode of Imparting Malarkey.
28 Aug 2026
TGIF!
Nate and Laura are back with a very special TGIF edition of Imparting Malarkey, which is exactly like a regular episode except it came out on Friday. Please don't examine the circumstances too closely.
This week, they attempt to determine what actually makes a cult a cult, whether CrossFit qualifies, and which sitcom characters would be easiest to recruit. Laura also reveals that her preferred cult strategy isn't to start one herself, but to join an existing one and manipulate her way to the top. This concerns Nate for several reasons.
From there, they consider the completely unserious things they'd change with a time machine, debate which of our current hygiene habits future generations will find horrifying, and Laura recounts the time she got peed on at a music festival.
Finally, Nate presents his theory for turning a pretend pirate ship into a legally questionable real pirate ship, and somehow several pieces of Imparting Malarkey lore begin converging in a way that probably shouldn't be encouraged.
Cults. Sitcoms. Time travel. Porta potties. Piracy.
Thank God it's Friday.
19 Aug 2026
Toe Finders
Nate is back, and Laura has finally accepted something about Imparting Malarkey: maybe "light and breezy" was never in the cards. Welcome to Malark in the Dark.
This week, Laura and Nate tackle the completely hypothetical question of how one might get rid of a body, which naturally leads to boats, balloons, questionable television pitches and the realization that perhaps neither of them should be giving life advice.
From there, they venture into their strangest internet rabbit holes, discuss the unsettling ways online communities can reinforce each other's beliefs, and discover the deeply disappointing truth about Plymouth Rock.
Finally, they get back to the truly important issues: the proper way to roast a marshmallow. Laura likes hers engulfed in flames. Nate believes there is an objectively correct technique. Neither leaves the conversation particularly changed.
Bodies. Rabbit holes. Disappointing historical landmarks. Artisanal marshmallows.
We're still imparting malarkey. We're just doing it in the dark now.
12 Aug 2026
Shenan again with Sara
We've got our first guest!
With Nate away, Laura is joined by her longtime friend Sara from Time in the Valley and The Unpolished Empire for an episode that proves there is apparently no shortage of people willing to impart some malarkey.
They talk about their friendship lore, Canada's strange obsession with claiming famous Canadians, which animals best represent them, inside thoughts accidentally becoming outside thoughts, and some truly terrible Would You Rather scenarios.
Plus, Laura discovers she relates a little too strongly to pandas, Sara wants to bite the heads off snakes, and a simple phone call to the CRA turns into a matter of principle over a $7 cheque. (Let's ignore the fact that she probably forgot to cash that check in the first place)
It's friendship, Canadiana, Cheeto dust, bureaucracy and an alarming number of tangents.
Nate will be back. In the meantime, Sara understood the assignment.
5 Aug 2026
The best episode in the world: A Tribute
This week, Laura and Nate recover from accidentally deleting what they firmly believe was the greatest podcast episode ever recorded.
Once they've finished grieving, they tackle some truly pressing questions:
Would you hide $500 billion for a year if your life depended on it?
Is the letter Q in the completely wrong place?
What is the most delightfully useless superpower you could have?
Along the way they redesign the alphabet, debate billionaire ethics, discover Laura would absolutely abuse the power to shut off public Wi-Fi, and continue proving that even the simplest questions can become hour-long discussions.
If you've ever had a conversation that started with one question and somehow ended with alphabet reform, you'll fit right in.
Crows are great.
29 Jul 2026
Build-a-Cult
If you and your best friend had to start a cult... what would it look like?
That's the completely normal question Laura and Nate attempt to answer this week.
Together they design a religious climate-change cult, invent a wildly questionable business model involving Noah's Ark, discover why neither of them should ever be trusted with leadership, and accidentally say several things they'd rather law enforcement ignore.
Then, in an abrupt tonal shift that somehow makes perfect sense, they discuss what they'd choose for their last meal and learn that friendship can survive many things... except buying someone the wrong pork rinds or dunking wonder bread in Diet Coke.
If you've ever wondered how a conversation can go from divine lightning to Wonder Bread soaked in Diet Coke, welcome to Imparting Malarkey.
As always, no actual cults were formed during the recording of this episode... probably,
22 Jul 2026
Attack of the Clones
What conspiracy theory do you secretly think might be true?
This week, Laura and Nate dive into everything from JFK and Marilyn Monroe to time travel, government cover-ups, and whether history has already been tampered with by future humans.
They also debut a brand-new segment, The Jar Jar Binks Of..., where they determine which pizza topping (or entire pizza style) is the most polarizing of the pizza world. (Listen as Laura forgets why they've started the segment)
And then things get weird.
Laura shares the ongoing saga of accidentally receiving emails intended for strangers who happen to share her name—including a scientist, a Texas online dater, a prolific shopper, and someone who may or may not become her future self. By the end of the episode, there's only one logical conclusion: maybe they're all the same Laura.
If you've ever gone down a conspiracy rabbit hole, argued over pizza toppings, or wondered if your alternate selves are living better lives than you are... this episode is for you.
Experts of Nothing. Still imparting malarkey.
15 Jul 2026
Get in the Van
Welcome to the very first episode of Imparting Malarkey!
In this inaugural episode, Laura and Nate introduce the podcast, explain how they landed on the name, and immediately prove they have no intention of staying on topic.
Along the way they debate:
Which Avenger would be the best drinking buddy.
Whether Bruce Banner is actually a terrible choice.
How much money it would take to get into a stranger's van.
The surprisingly questionable usefulness of being unbreakable.
And why "a hill you'd die on" apparently means something very different to Nate.
If you've ever had a conversation that started in one place and ended somewhere completely unrecognizable, you'll fit right in.
Experts of Nothing. Professional wanderers of thought. Welcome to Imparting Malarkey.
Contact Imparting Malarkey
Guest appearances
Books guests
Based on episode analysis; this does not confirm that the show is currently accepting guests.
Host of Imparting Malarkey?
Claim your podcast to manage its listing and keep your show details accurate.
Pod Engine is an independent podcast discovery and analytics service and is not affiliated with or endorsed by this podcast. Artwork and show content belong to their owners. Full legal notice.
Explore this show Podcast research with Pod Engine
