Just Listen To Me!

About Just Listen To Me!

🎙️ New episodes every Tuesday and Thursday Welcome to the place where love stops performing and starts telling the truth. I’m a couples counsellor who works with the real moments of relationships — the disconnection, the misunderstandings, and the deep longing to feel safe and chosen. Using an emotionally focused couples therapy lens, I break down attachment patterns, communication breakdowns, and the cycles that keep couples stuck. This podcast is for people who care deeply and want to understand what’s actually happening beneath the arguments, silence, or distance — without quick fixes or clichés. Whether you’re healing your relationship, reconnecting, or breaking generational patterns around love and attachment, this is a space to slow down and grow. Alongside relationship and attachment education, the podcast also explores narcissistic and coercive relational dynamics, emotional safety, emotionally unsafe systems, and the difference between genuine therapeutic support and dependency or emotional manipulation. Just Listen to Me was created to support individuals and couples navigating relationship pain and attachment wounds, while also providing therapists, counsellors, and helping professionals with attachment-informed conversations that deepen clinical thinking, reflective practice, and emotionally focused work. You’re welcome here. Let’s build relationships that feel safe, real, and alive. The stories and relationship dynamics shared in this podcast are always de-identified and adapted to protect privacy and confidentiality. Many examples are composites based on common patterns seen across therapeutic work. Available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Amazon Music, iHeartRadio, and wherever you get your podcasts. Disclaimer: This podcast is provided for educational and informational purposes only. The content is not intended to diagnose, treat, or provide professional mental health care, counselling, or psychological support. The information shared should not be considered a substitute for individualised advice or support from a qualified mental health professional. If you are experiencing significant distress or have concerns about your mental health or safety, please seek appropriate professional support.

Publisher

Julia Shay

Category

health & fitness · society & culture

Language

en

Explicit

No

First episode

16 Feb 2026

Latest episode

15 Oct 2026

Latest episodes

54 episodes in the feed.

1. 

   15 Oct 2026

   Deborah & Ava- When Connection Feels Like a Threat: Attachment Lessons from Hacks

   What happens when someone becomes deeply important to you — and that’s exactly what makes the relationship feel dangerous? In Hacks, Deborah Vance and Ava Daniels are boss and employee, mentor and protégé, friends, rivals — and occasionally something resembling mortal enemies. But underneath the power struggles, sarcasm, betrayals and spectacular attempts to push each other away is a relationship that matters enormously to both of them. In this episode of Just Listen to Me, Julia looks at Deborah and Ava through an attachment lens: Deborah’s fierce independence and need for control, Ava’s longing to know that she matters, and the cycle that keeps pulling them together before pushing them apart again. Because sometimes “I don’t need you” is protecting something much more vulnerable: “You matter to me enough that you could hurt me.” And perhaps the challenge of connection isn’t learning not to need each other — but learning that needing someone doesn’t always have to feel so dangerous. This is the final episode of Season 4 of Just Listen to Me. I’ll be taking a short break and will be back in a few weeks with Season 5 — and plenty more conversations about attachment, relationships, trauma and the messy business of being human. See you then.

2. 

   13 Oct 2026

   “My AI Understands Me Better Than You Do” - AI, Love & Attachment

   What happens when talking to AI starts feeling easier than talking to your partner? AI can be patient, responsive and surprisingly comforting — especially when human connection feels complicated. For one partner, it might offer connection without rejection. For another, connection without pressure. But what happens when AI starts taking up emotional space inside the relationship? In this episode of Just Listen to Me, Julia explores AI through an attachment lens: why it can feel so emotionally safe, how it can become part of a couple’s negative cycle, and whether turning to AI for emotional support could ever cross into emotional infidelity. Because the real question may not be whether AI is replacing human connection. It might be whether we’re using it to help us find our way back to each other — or to avoid having to.

3. 

   9 Oct 2026

   When Individual Therapy Has Made Couples Therapy Harder

   Individual therapy can be an incredibly valuable companion to couples therapy — but sometimes, what happens in one room can unintentionally make the work in another room harder. In this therapist-focused episode, Julia explores what can happen when individual and couples therapy are running concurrently, particularly when the two therapists are working from very different lenses. We look at how individual therapy can sometimes reinforce one partner’s perspective, strengthen blame, or shift the focus away from the relational cycle — even when the individual therapist is doing thoughtful, ethical work with the information available to them. Julia also explores the distinction between validation and certainty, what couples therapists can do when a fixed clinical formulation enters the room, and what to consider when referring one partner for concurrent individual therapy. Because individual and couples therapy don’t have to compete. When the roles are clear and the work is complementary, they can offer two very different — and equally valuable — spaces for healing. For therapists and relationship professionals.

Reach and audience

Public platform figures. Ratings count people who left a rating, not total listeners.

Spotify

5.0 / 5

1 ratings

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Guest appearances

Does not typically book guests

Based on episode analysis; this does not confirm that the show is currently accepting guests.