19 Aug 2026
Episode 32. Secrets Clients Never Tell
Episode SummaryMost people never say the true reason they hesitate to open up to a therapist or a counselor: fear of being judged. This episode looks at what the research actually shows about client secrecy in counseling and therapy. Studies find that the large majority of clients admit to withholding something from theirprovider at some point, most often around sex, suicidal thoughts, self harm, trauma, substance use, and financial shame. The episode traces why concealment happens, why suicidal ideation specifically tends to be underreported for practical rather than purely emotional reasons, and what the research says actually helps clients open up, including therapeutic alliance and appropriate counselor self disclosure. The episode closes with a note on the ongoing debate around self disclosure as a clinical technique, and an invitation for listeners carrying a secret of their own.
Content NoteThis episode includes research on clients withholding suicidal thoughts from their therapist. It does not go into detail, but if that topic is difficult for you right now, feel free to skip this episode or stop at any point. Nothing in this episode is a substitute for counseling or therapy. It is general research andreflection, not clinical advice, and it is not a replacement for working with a licensed professional.
Help and Crisis Resources● United States: Call or text 988 to reach the Suicide andCrisis Lifeline, available any time, free and confidential.
● United States: Text HOME to 741741 to reach the CrisisText Line if talking on the phone feels like too much.
● Outside the United States: The International Associationfor Suicide Prevention keeps a directory of crisis lines by country at iasp.info/resources/Crisis_Centres.
If you need support, please reach out to one of these resources or to a trusted provider.
References
Baumann, E. C., & Hill, C. E. (2016). Client concealment anddisclosure of secrets in outpatient psychotherapy. Counselling Psychology Quarterly, 29(1), 53–75. https://doi.org/10.1080/09515070.2015.1023698
Blanchard, M., & Farber, B. A. (2016). Lying in psychotherapy: Why and what clients don't tell their therapist about therapyand their relationship. Counselling Psychology Quarterly, 29(1), 90–112. https://doi.org/10.1080/09515070.2015.1085365
Blanchard, M., & Farber, B. A. (2020). “It is never okay totalk about suicide”: Patients' reasons for concealing suicidal ideation in psychotherapy. Psychotherapy Research, 30(1), 124–136. https://doi.org/10.1080/10503307.2018.1543977
Farber, B. A. (2006). Self disclosure in psychotherapy. GuilfordPress.
Farber, B. A., Berano, K. C., & Capobianco, J. A. (2004).Clients' perceptions of the process and consequences of self disclosure in psychotherapy. Journal of Counseling Psychology, 51(3), 340–346. https://doi.org/10.1037/0022-0167.51.3.340
Farber, B. A., Blanchard, M., & Love, M. (2019). Secrets andlies in psychotherapy. American Psychological Association.https://doi.org/10.1037/0000128-000
Hall, D. A., & Farber, B. A. (2001). Patterns of patient disclosure in psychotherapy. Journal of the American Academy of Psychoanalysis, 29(2), 213–230. https://doi.org/10.1521/jaap.29.2.213.17262
Henretty, J. R., Currier, J. M., Berman, J. S., & Levitt, H.M. (2014). The impact of counselor self disclosure on clients: A meta analytic review of experimental and quasi experimental research. Journal of Counseling Psychology, 61(2), 191–207. https://doi.org/10.1037/a0036189
Jeffery, D. (2026). Therapist self disclosure: A systematicreview and brief person centered framework for clinical practice and training. Frontiers in Psychology, 17, Article 1869955.https://doi.org/10.3389/fpsyg.2026.1869955
Kelly, A. E. (1998). Client secret keeping in outpatient therapy. Journal of Counseling Psychology, 45(1), 50–57. https://doi.org/10.1037/0022-0167.45.1.50
