Life = Choices; Choices = Life

About Life = Choices; Choices = Life

Hosted by author, speaker, and coach Kim Olver, Life = Choices; Choices = Life explores how personal responsibility, emotional awareness, and intentional decision-making shape our relationships, leadership, and everyday lives. Drawing on the principles of Choice Theory® and the framework of Mental Freedom®, Kim has thoughtful conversations with experts, educators, coaches, and leaders about how people can respond to life with greater clarity, connection, and purpose. Kim Olver is the author of several books on relationships and personal growth, including Mental Freedom®: You Hold the Key, Choosing Me Now, and Secrets of Happy Couples. Each episode offers practical insights on topics such as: • Relationships and couples • Parenting and family dynamics • Leadership and workplace culture • coaching and personal development • Education and human behavior • Emotional resilience and mental health • Diversity, equity, inclusion, and belonging Through interviews and occasional solo reflections, Kim helps listeners understand how our thinking shapes our actions—and how choosing responsibility over blame can lead to healthier relationships, stronger leadership, and a greater sense of freedom. If you're interested in personal growth, meaningful conversations, and learning how to respond to life with intention rather than reaction, this podcast offers ideas, tools, and perspectives you can apply right away. Because ultimately, Life equals choices… and choices equal life.

Publisher

Kim Olver

Category

education · health & fitness · society & culture

Language

en

Explicit

No

First episode

18 Dec 2019

Latest episode

15 Oct 2026

Latest episodes

315 episodes in the feed.

1. 

   15 Oct 2026

   Why Your Behavior Makes Sense, Even When It Seems to Be Hurting You

   Have you ever caught yourself repeating a behavior you know isn't helping you and wondered, "Why do I keep doing this?" Maybe you avoid difficult conversations, shut down when you're overwhelmed, try to please everyone around you, or procrastinate until the pressure becomes unbearable. You know the behavior isn't working, yet you continue doing it. What if, instead of asking "What's wrong with me?" you asked, "What is this behavior trying to do for me?" In this Mental Freedom Moment, Kim Olver explores the Choice Theory® principle that all behavior is purposeful. Even behaviors that create problems may have developed as ways to protect ourselves, maintain relationships, satisfy our needs, or manage uncomfortable emotions. Kim explains why understanding the purpose behind a behavior doesn't mean excusing it or avoiding responsibility. Instead, understanding gives us information we can use to make different choices. Sometimes a behavior that helped us navigate yesterday's circumstances becomes an obstacle to what we want today. In this episode, Kim discusses: Why behavior can make sense even when it isn't helping How Choice Theory helps us understand purposeful behavior Why people-pleasing may develop as a way to maintain connection or feel safe How avoidance can provide short-term relief while creating long-term problems The adaptive, protective, relational, and regulatory purposes behavior may serve Why understanding behavior isn't the same as excusing it How curiosity creates opportunities for self-evaluation The difference between personal responsibility and self-blame How Mental Freedom® helps us recognize choices available today Questions to Consider What behavior do you repeatedly choose even though it isn't helping you? What might that behavior be trying to accomplish for you? Did it serve a useful purpose at an earlier time in your life? Is it still the best way you know to get what you want? What other behavior might help you accomplish the same purpose without the same cost?

2. 

   8 Oct 2026

   Stop Beating Yourself Up: Self-Forgiveness & the Stories We Tell with Shari Foos | Part 2

   What if understanding why you behaved the way you did could help you stop punishing yourself for it? In Part 2 of Kim's conversation with therapist and The Narrative Method founder Shari Foos, they explore self-forgiveness, storytelling, creativity, and what becomes possible when we look at our past behavior with curiosity instead of condemnation. Kim shares a Mental Freedom® perspective that every person is doing the best they know to get what they want in that moment. That doesn't mean every behavior is helpful or that harmful behavior should be excused. It means that when we understand what we were trying to accomplish or what need we were attempting to satisfy, we may be able to replace judgment with understanding and make different choices today. Shari connects this idea to The Narrative Method, where storytelling and creative writing can help people externalize their experiences and notice patterns they may have difficulty seeing when they're busy criticizing themselves. Rather than asking, “What's wrong with me?” we can become curious about what was happening inside us and what we might do differently now. Shari also introduces several concepts from The Narrative Method, including relational mindfulness, radical gratitude, kaleidoscoping, upgrading, narrative awe, and the “rocket ship”—the idea that even a tiny change in trajectory can eventually take us somewhere very different. Kim and Shari also discuss something important to both of their approaches: forgiveness should never be forced. Forgiveness may be liberating, but readiness matters, and no one else gets to decide when—or whether—you are ready. Key Takeaway Understanding why you behaved as you did doesn't erase consequences or excuse harm. It can help you stop using your past as evidence against yourself. You can understand the person you were, take responsibility where needed, and choose differently with the knowledge and skills you have today. You don't have to transform everything at once. Sometimes changing your trajectory by one small degree is enough to begin moving toward something different. To register to attend a free salon, visit Free Online Writing Salons & Community | The Narrative Method (https://www.thenarrativemethod.org/) or email Shari at info@thenarrativemethod.org (mailto:info@thenarrativemethod.org).

3. 

   1 Oct 2026

   The Cult of Culture: Finding Your Authentic Voice with Shari Foos | Part 1

   What happens when the culture surrounding us becomes so loud that we lose touch with who we actually are? In this first half of Kim's conversation with therapist and The Narrative Method founder Shari Foos, they explore what Shari calls the “cult of culture”—the constant stream of social pressure, media messages, consumerism, comparison, and unrealistic expectations that can pull us away from our authentic selves. Shari and Kim discuss the growing gap between people's mental health needs and the support available to them, including financial barriers, stigma, and a lack of understanding about mental health. But Shari suggests there is another powerful force at work: a culture that continually tells us how we're supposed to look, behave, think, and live. They explore how these messages can begin early in life, teaching us to compare our families, bodies, possessions, and lives to idealized images. Social media has intensified that pressure, creating a world in which we can appear more connected than ever while still feeling unseen, unheard, and disconnected from ourselves. Shari also introduces The Narrative Method and its free online salons, where participants respond to writing prompts and share their work without criticism, advice, compliments, or correction. Instead, others simply witness and listen. The goal isn't to become a better writer. It's to create enough safety to quiet the inner critic, access creativity, hear your own voice, and experience genuine human connection. Kim and Shari also explore the role fear plays in limiting creativity and self-expression, why boredom may be more valuable than we've come to believe, and how small shifts in awareness can help us reconnect with ourselves and enjoy our lives more fully. Key Takeaway When we're constantly surrounded by messages telling us who we're supposed to be, it can become difficult to hear our own voice. Creating space for introspection, creativity, authentic expression, and genuine human connection can help us rediscover who we are beneath the noise. Join Kim next week for Part 2 of this heartfelt conversation with Shari Foos about mental health, connection, and what it means to be fully human.

Who has been a guest on Life = Choices; Choices = Life

Names identified in recent episode analyses. Showing up to five guests.

• Dr Janet Morgan
• Jane Newman
• Christine Miles
• Angela Acosta
• Ashley Patrick

Reach and audience

Public platform figures. Ratings count people who left a rating, not total listeners.

YouTube views

11,239

Score snapshot 15 Sept 2025

Apple Podcasts (US)

5.0 / 5

11 ratings

Spotify

5.0 / 5

4 ratings

Podcast Authority Score: 70 / 100

A composite of feed quality, social presence, YouTube performance and engagement. Read the methodology.

Quality

76

Social presence

0

YouTube

72

Engagement

90