21 Nov 2025
When You Can’t Moderate Anymore: A Conversation About Binge Drinking & Becoming Free with Colleen
In this episode of Mindful Sobriety: The Podcast, Jane is welcomes back a beloved returning guest, Colleen Clifford—binge-drinking survivor, commercial fisherwoman, and alcohol-free & health coach.
Jane and Colleen recorded their first conversation almost exactly a year ago, and since then Jane has reached 1,000 days alcohol-free and Colleen has continued to build a beautiful, full life in her 60s—anchored in sobriety, service, and deep connection.
Together they dive into the realities of binge drinking, the terror and science of blackouts, the language we use around suicide, and the courage it takes to ask for help. Colleen shares about her late husband’s death by suicide, her ongoing healing, and how her upcoming book Life Beyond Binge Drinking is part love letter, part wake-up call for anyone caught in the binge cycle. They also talk about Bali retreats, horses, inner child joy, and why life can actually feel more vibrant, playful, and hopeful without alcohol.
In This Episode, We Explore:
A podcast & sobriety milestone
Jane celebrates 1,000 days alcohol-free on the summer solstice
How growth and self-discovery keep unfolding well beyond the first sober year
Colleen’s story: from binge drinking to “life beyond”
Her 40-year relationship with alcohol and why she calls herself a “binge drinking survivor”
The moment she woke up after driving home drunk with one eye closed—and knew something had to change
Why the 2% of the time she couldn’t moderate kept her stuck for years
Blackouts & the brain
What actually happens in the brain during a blackout
Why those memories truly are not recoverable
How blackouts fuel denial, shame, and confusion for drinkers and loved ones
Talking honestly about suicide & alcohol
Why Colleen uses the language “died by suicide” instead of “committed suicide”
How binge drinking can push someone over the edge, especially with underlying mental health struggles
The compassion of seeing suicide as a tragic outcome of illness, not a moral failing
Asking for help when you’re the “strong one”
Colleen’s struggle with independence, pride, and the belief that she had to do everything alone
How hard it can be to receive support when you’re used to being the helper
Reframing asking for help as an act of courage and a compliment to the people you trust
Life at 62: full-hearted, alcohol-free, and evolving
Why Colleen is genuinely excited about aging
Redefining success beyond income: impact, connection, and legacy moments people “never forget”
Volunteering with hippotherapy, horses, and the healing power of animal connection
Inner child joy & alcohol-free living
How sobriety reopens space for play, creativity, and nature
Bali retreat memories, laughing in the water, flowers, animals, and letting the inner child lead
Giving yourself permission to be a beginner again and follow what lights you up
Practical hope for anyone stuck in a binge cycle
The shame spiral of “I know better, so why can’t I stop?”
Gentle first steps: lurking in online groups, turning camera off in meetings, or simply listening
How coaches, communities, and peer support can help you untangle your “ball of yarn” and take one tiny step forward
Resources Mentioned
988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline (U.S.) (https://988lifeline.org/) – Call or text 988 for 24/7 confidential support if you or someone you love is in emotional distress or thinking about suicide.
Women for Sobriety (https://womenforsobriety.org/) – A free, women-centered recovery community and meeting platform.
Recovery communities & support options (examples you can link):
Recovery Dharma (https://recoverydharma.org/)
SMART Recovery (https://smartrecovery.org/meeting?gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=22896885811&gbraid=0AAAAAD7GY0MOBzNnZsMF29YY8wHcRTXLr&gclid=CjwKCAiA8vXIBhAtEiwAf3B-g6q4d-CJ2Eg0Wngn1EwFIkJgyVJFui2BqQKzQXVauZJk3mnFdZxStRoCShEQAvD_BwE)
Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) (https://www.aa.org/)
Al-Anon (https://al-anon.org/) (for loved ones of those struggling with addiction)
Online alcohol-free communities – Facebook groups and online forums where you can start by simply reading and noticing what resonates.
Connect with Colleen
Email: Colleen@purepotential.health
Website: purepotential.health (https://purepotential.health/?utm_source=ig&utm_medium=social&utm_content=link_in_bio&fbclid=PAZXh0bgNhZW0CMTEAc3J0YwZhcHBfaWQMMjU2MjgxMDQwNTU4AAGnd5c39ZnQ1qLlSoF7JGuXfD3WRXH5_oDFAPJd-UQD2x-VEgWlqk-XOV0TvQY_aem_v2UPMqDrqwhT25ybnaKf_Q)
Instagram: @purepotentialhealth (https://www.instagram.com/purepotential.health/)
LinkedIn: Search “Pure Potential Health – Colleen Clifford”
Connect with Jane & Mindful Sobriety
Instagram: @janeballardwellness (https://www.instagram.com/janewballard/)
Podcast: Mindful Sobriety: The Podcast (wherever you listen) (https://themindfulsobrietypodcast.transistor.fm/)
Website: www.janewballard.com (https://www.janewballard.com/)
If You’re Struggling Right Now
If binge drinking, grief, or any kind of binge behavior is weighing on you, you are not alone—and there is real hope. Your first step doesn’t have to be perfect or public. It might be:
Listening quietly to an online meeting
Creeping in a Facebook group and reading others’ stories
Sending a short email to a coach or therapist
Telling one trusted person, “I think I need some help”
Tiny steps count.
Enjoying the Podcast?
If this conversation resonated with you, it would mean so much if you would:
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Your support truly helps this message reach more people who are quietly struggling and reminds them that a beautiful, alcohol-free life is absolutely possible. 💛
