We rarely get to hear how people actually make relationships work, especially in the high-pressure, fast-paced world of tech. While there's endless dating advice out there, what's missing are the real, unfiltered stories of how ambitious people navigate modern relationships and build a life together. Unlike every other aspect of modern life that can be solved with an app or outsourced to a service, building meaningful relationships remains stubbornly resistant to quick fixes. Through conversations with leading relationship thinkers and candid interviews with real couples, we dig into the raw truth of what it takes to make partnerships work - from the challenges and fights to the breakthroughs and lessons learned along the way. I believe we learn best from seeing how others have navigated similar paths. These conversations offer honest perspectives on what it really takes to make modern relationships work in our corner of the world. Hosted by Erik Torenberg, investor and entrepreneur. Modern Relationships is part of the Turpentine podcast network.
"Modern Relationships"
Claim This Podcastby Erik Torenberg, Turpentine
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Podcast Overview
We rarely get to hear how people actually make relationships work, especially in the high-pressure, fast-paced world of tech. While there's endless dating advice out there, what's missing are the real, unfiltered stories of how ambitious people navigate modern relationships and build a life together. Unlike every other aspect of modern life that can be solved with an app or outsourced to a service, building meaningful relationships remains stubbornly resistant to quick fixes. Through conversations with leading relationship thinkers and candid interviews with real couples, we dig into the raw truth of what it takes to make partnerships work - from the challenges and fights to the breakthroughs and lessons learned along the way. I believe we learn best from seeing how others have navigated similar paths. These conversations offer honest perspectives on what it really takes to make modern relationships work in our corner of the world. Hosted by Erik Torenberg, investor and entrepreneur. Modern Relationships is part of the Turpentine podcast network.
Language
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Publishing Since
12/18/2024
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Recent Episodes
July 11, 2025
Strong Magnet Theory: Attracting Your Ideal Partner with Joyce Zhang, High Performers Dating Coach
This week, Erik talks to dating coach and former Stripe engineer Joyce Zhang and reveals her strategic dating frameworks and explains why people's standards are too low (not high). She introduces her controversial "hardball" filtering technique, and argues that dating apps work excellently with proper strategy—but self-love remains the biggest bottleneck. Modern Relationships is a podcast from Turpentine. Learn more: www.turpentine.co -- SPONSOR: Relationship Hero It’s an open secret in Silicon Valley that people are using relationship coaches. Sign up for 1-on-1 relationship coaching (from anywhere) at RelationshipHero.com/modern. Get $50 off your first session. -- LINKS: Joyce Zhang Substack: https://thejoycezhang.substack.com/ -- FOLLOW ON X: Joyce - @thejoycezhang Erik - @eriktorenberg Turpentine - @turpentinemedia Chapters 00:00:00 Intro and Preview 00:02:30 Journey to Becoming a Dating Coach 00:03:32 What is Dating Strategy? 00:04:09 Why Dating Apps Actually Work 00:05:34 The "Inbox Zero for Hinge" Method 00:07:02 Common Profile Mistakes 00:09:21 Strong Magnet vs. Weak Magnet Theory 00:11:00 Why People's Standards Are Too Low 00:12:56 Communication Strategy After Matching 00:14:36 Sponsor - Relationship Hero 00:16:11 Live Swiping Sessions with Clients 00:21:00 Three Core Dating Problems 00:23:04 North Star Feelings Framework 00:29:35 Limiting Beliefs in Dating 00:35:53 Feeling Like a "Commodity" on Apps 00:39:00 The Stable Marriage Problem 00:47:00 Attachment Theory as a Crutch 00:49:05 Joyce's 5-Step Coaching Framework 00:56:03 MECE Compatibility Framework 01:00:54 Building a Dating Academy 01:02:51 Biggest Bottleneck: Mindset vs. Tactics 01:0:42 The Needle in a Haystack Problem 01:07:01 Wrap
May 9, 2025
Triggered to Transformed with Art of Accomplishment's Joe Hudson and Tara Howley
This week, Erik sits down with Joe Hudson and Tara Howley, the extraordinary couple behind Art of Accomplishment, whose coaching has helped CEOs like Sam Altman. They share their journey from a toxic relationship to a deeply connected partnership, offering personal stories, practical strategies, and insights on how self-growth, therapy, and commitment to transformation can foster resilient, loving relationships. Modern Relationships is a podcast from Turpentine. Learn more: www.turpentine.co -- SPONSOR: Relationship Hero It’s an open secret in Silicon Valley that people are using relationship coaches. Sign up for 1-on-1 relationship coaching (from anywhere) at RelationshipHero.com/modern. Get $50 off your first session. -- LINK/S: Art of Accomplishment: https://www.artofaccomplishment.com/ Joe and Esme — The Teenage Years: https://youtu.be/Eg70lbiElrI?si=bK-8FB-bzYh6HqL1 How to Be a Parent (Without Messing Everything Up) | Joe Hudson and Nathan Baschez: https://www.artofaccomplishment.com/podcast/how-to-be-a-parent-without-messing-everything-up-joe-hudson-and-nathan-baschez -- FOLLOW ON X: Joe - @FU_joehudson Erik - @eriktorenberg Turpentine - @turpentinemedia Chapters 00:00:00 Preview and Intro 00:01:48 Disclosure 00:02:54 Welcome Joe and Tara 00:03:01 How Joe and Tara Met 00:13:03 Early Challenges and Growth 00:14:11 The Role of Self-Development 00:16:39 Navigating Relationship Dynamics 00:17:14 Sponsor: Relationship Hero 00:18:49 Transformation and Trust 00:27:10 Marriage Requirements and Challenges 00:28:27 Evaluating a Life Partner 00:30:27 Trade-offs and Compromises in Marriage 00:35:57 The Importance of Being Seen 00:43:11 Triggers and Personal Growth 00:44:53 Grieving and Moving On 00:46:55 Choosing the Right Partner 00:53:54 Life Changes and Marriage 00:55:18 Wrap
April 25, 2025
Lindsay Taub & Harley Finkelstein: How to Build a Ride or Die Partnership
In this episode, Erik sits down with Harley Finkelstein and Lindsay Taub, partners of 15 years. Harley, Shopify's president, and Lindsay, a psychotherapist and entrepreneur, discuss their speed dating origin story, balancing radical acceptance with growth, and redefining work-life balance while raising two daughters together when your job is all-consuming. Modern Relationships is a podcast from Turpentine. Learn more: www.turpentine.co -- SPONSOR: Relationship Hero It’s an open secret in Silicon Valley that people are using relationship coaches. Sign up for 1-on-1 relationship coaching (from anywhere) at RelationshipHero.com/modern. Get $50 off your first session. -- Shopify: https://www.shopify.com/ph -- FOLLOW ON X: Harley - @harleyf Erik - @eriktorenberg Turpentine - @turpentinemedia Chapters 00:00:00 Preview and Intro 00:01:39 Disclosure 00:02:45 The Speed Dating Origin Story 00:04:47 Early Relationship Challenges 00:07:27 Deciding to Move In Together 00:10:25 True Partnerships and Taking Chances 00:13:26 Sponsor: Relationship Hero 00:15:07 Building Success Together 00:17:55 Relationships Are Constantly Evolving 00:19:24 Relationship Role Models and Date Nights 00:23:09 The Value of Couples Therapy 00:24:45 Finding a Partner: What Doesn't Work 00:26:28 The Importance of Sharing Life Goals 00:29:09 Intentionality: "How You Do Anything Is How You Do Everything" 00:34:16 Raising Kids and Money 00:39:00 Teaching Gratitude and Philanthropy 00:43:21 Parenting by Example 00:48:25 The Key to Relationship Longevity 00:52:00 Incorporating Work and Life 00:54:37 Accepting Your Partner While Encouraging Growth 00:58:27 Wrap
26 total episodes available
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This podcast is available on 8 platforms including Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and more. You can also use the RSS feed directly.
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