8 Oct 2026
When Losing a Sibling - Have You Wonderd Why They Do Not Cry?
After 22 years as a technical instructor in the corporate world—and another layoff—Zander Sprague hit a low point. He asked, "Why am I teaching other people's material when what I want to do is teach my own?" How many of you have had a similar experience?
Zander was devastated by the murder of his sister, Lucy, but he did not want to add to his parents' burden during their profound grief. Many families struggle to connect when they need one another most. Later, parents often asked Zander, "Why don't they cry?" Their questions inspired this book for parents and surviving siblings. It will help you navigate your own grief while supporting loved ones through theirs.
Zander Sprague is a TV host, speaker, award-winning author, and Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor (LPCC). His mission is to help millions of people make the EPIC choices that create an EPIC life. He is a member of the National Speakers Association and author of three books.
In this interview, Zander also shares what you need to master the simple yet transformative habit of taking one step forward. This book will reshape the way you think about success and progress. It gives you the practical steps you need to create EPIC results - whether you want to run a marathon, lose weight, write a book, get promoted, start a business, or achieve any other goal.
"My most powerful tool was CHOICE, which I get every day
to choose how I deal with the tragedies I have experienced."
Why Don't They Cry?: Understanding Your Living Child's Grief
A compassionate guide for parents supporting sibling survivors™ through grief, offering hope, healing, and renewed family connection.
When tragedy strikes, grief touches every member of a family, but parents and surviving siblings often experience it in very different ways.
When Zander Sprague's sister Lucy was murdered, his world shattered. Yet, in his parents' deepest sorrow, Zander chose not to show his own pain, afraid of adding to their burden. That silence left questions unspoken, connections strained, and healing delayed. That experience raised the question many grieving parents ask: "Why don't they cry?"
This compassionate and practical guide offers parents a window into the unique grief of sibling survivors™, why they may seem distant, withdrawn, or unemotional, and how to bridge that gap gently. Drawing from personal loss and years of supporting families, Zander provides insights and tools to help parents:
Understand the silent grief of
Reconnect with surviving children through open communication and empathy
Strengthen family bonds in the face of unimaginable pain
Create a path toward collective healing, rather than isolation
Why Don't They Cry? is more than a book; it's a lifeline for families navigating the hardest journey of all, offering hope, understanding, and a way forward together.
Ideal for parents grieving the loss of a child, families supporting sibling survivors, and anyone seeking guidance on parenting through grief and sibling loss. This book belongs on the shelf of every grief support group, faith-based ministry, and healing resource for families.
There are many things that you think you might be prepared for in life; losing your sibling is not one of them. This book will help you choose your own positive pathway to healing and recovery. Zander Sprague is a two-time sibling survivor and the GO TO Speaker, Author, and Coach for Sibling Loss.
