Hosted by the ultimate average joe slash nobody slash aspiring podcaster Afiq. Who? Exactly. He invites his friends over to talk about different stuff like life, love, movies, sports, whatever man. Tune in as they discuss, ramble, rant, and engage in opinionated discourse among others. Join him on his quest to perfect the art of conversation, one dumb anecdote and one dead pause at a time. Uncensored, uncultured, underwater. Disclaimer: This podcast is not for babies or 𝘮𝘢𝘬𝘤𝘪𝘬𝘴.
(APOLOGIES FOR THE GLARING ECHO FROM MY MICROPHONE) Back at it again with the two blokes from the previous episode: Syaiful and Mirza. This is an intervention. Of sorts. Mirza bravely shares his harrowing story of his ex-girlfriend turned fiancee of three years. Engaged for only three months. Harsh. Afiq and Syaiful give unqualified advice. Syaiful laughs a lot. Afiq has a sleepy and echoey voice. Mirza does thank you shout outs to the ones that helped him through that difficult period in his life at the end. Mirza's hair reminds Syaiful of Pennywise. Emotional. Raw. Cooked.
17 Oct 2020
#7: ITE More Better?!
In this episode, Afiq invites two of his best buds from ITE College Central: Syai and Mirza. Syai thinks Afiq stole his primary school best friend. Afiq does not remember. Mirza is the smartest among them in ITE. They reminisce good memories during their ITE years. Afiq has always been a serial latecomer. Syai originally wants to enter into JC. Afiq misses the food. They talk about friends, projects, and internships. Afiq wants people to change their perception of ITE in general. And other stuff lah. Main talking point: ITE actually isn't that bad you guys. Follow No Pod No Lard on Instagram, @nopodnolardsg. Thanks, babies.
4 Oct 2020
#6: English Football Simps, Dreams and Shit Pundits
In this episode, legendary West Grove Primary School alumni Zulhilmi joins as guest host. The boys chat about English football and their respective Premier League clubs. Football all day, everyday baby. The boys talk dream signings and predict the winner of the 20/21 English Premier League season. Naz bemoans about the state of his beloved Manchester United. Naz wants to support Everton. Naz also mispronounces a bunch of words because he Malay, Zul is a Mikel Arteta simp. More football related banter. Afiq realises he didn't record this episode using his microphone. Idiot. Ole, ole, ole, ole! Boleh, boleh.
23 Aug 2020
#5: The Idiot's Guide to Toxic Relationships, Red Flags and Self-Enlightenment
In this episode, the boys discuss toxic relationships and the various accompanying red flags that are just stupid and ridiculous. Friend and guest “Fakrol” joins this episode fresh from his own experiences in a toxic relationship. The boys also share their experiences dealing with the emotional aftermath that comes after dabbling in such entanglements. They also talk about the importance of honesty, self-love, knowing one’s worth and the lessons one could stand to gain. The boys tell it as it is. They’re no Thought Catalog. This is our most serious episode, you guys. We’re talking about some super deep-seated issues of the heart stuff here. Raw, personal, and broken English.
8 Aug 2020
#4: We Are Singkahpore, Singkahporeans
In this episode, Naz returns! This time as the official co-host of the podcast. This episode celebrates the nation’s 55th birthday as the boys ramble about what they love about the country, typical National Day traditions, and what’s potentially different about this year’s celebrations amid these trying Coronavirus times. Afiq shares his annoyance with entitled Singaporeans and his desire to emigrate to another country someday. Naz shares his experience being “involved” in the National Day Parade celebrations and educates uncultured swine Afiq about local Chinese food. The boys also talk about the differences between Singapore and Malaysia and the decline of the National Day song. Neither boys actually care about the National Day Parade lah honestly.
(Our sincerest apologies as this episode had some audio, staticky noise interferences in the background. Bopian ah.)
29 Jul 2020
#3: Dating Apps and Afiq Got Catfished?!
In this episode, Afiq invites one of his best friends Naz to talk about dating apps and their place in society today. The boys share their dating app experiences: Naz shares his experience using Muslim dating app Muzmatch, and Afiq reveals his Tinder “game”. Afiq also shares one of the most harrowing, embarrassing and traumatic experiences in his life, getting catfished in his early online chatting up days on OkCupid. Naz brings the 𝘔𝘢𝘭𝘢𝘪𝘳𝘦𝘯 energy and the laughs in this episode while legends say that Afiq is still pretty much mentally disturbed by that incident.
20 Jul 2020
#2: Mendak Energy
In this episode, the boys reflect on the feedback they've received from the pilot. They address the love, constructive comments, criticisms and the general consensus that Naufal seemingly exhibits dumb levels of "mendak energy" and isn't suited to host a podcast. “Mendak” is a colloquial, slang term in Malay, which essentially means boring. Afiq makes fun of one stupid feedback and then digresses into why he refuses to work in the F&B industry. Afiq also channels his inner asshole and pokes fun at his co-host's many quirks: intonation, delivery, monotone voice, stench of "mendak energy" and infinite scowling. In response, Naufal goes on the defensive, desperate to make a mark. He strikes back and then mumbles about some other shit. Naufal calls this one his “redemption episode”. Also, his audio is better this time.
9 Jul 2020
#1: Pilot
In the pilot, the boys talked a wee bit about the upcoming Singapore General Election 2020, Naufal's weird excitement about being a first time voter, their love for podcasts and how it all came to be. Afiq flexes his geeky know-how about Star Wars chronology in a terrible digression midway through the recording. Everything is fine and dandy.
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