Welcome to the One Red Flag Podcast, because sometimes you see them and sometimes you don’t.
Have you ever felt like something was off in a relationship, but you couldn’t quite put your finger on it? This podcast is all about learning how to figure out what those crucial early warning signs are – the red flags you shouldn’t ignore.
Hosted by two New York therapists who won’t give you sad eyes, Brooke Donatone and Lauren Shah. We'll guide you through the art of identifying and navigating those difficult individuals and situations who drain your energy and leave you feeling frustrated. We may even help you figure out how to make that next family holiday dinner a little less awkward.
Grayrocking has been talked about as a technique to stop Narcissists in their tracks, but is it really the right technique to use? We will talk about how and when to use this technique, and when you should not use it with red flag people.
29 Sept 2026
Clancy Conspiracy Theories
We are interrupting our gaslighting series to talk about a major case. The Lindsay Clancy trial has been a major case that has been talked about amongst clinicians, and just about everyone. In this podcast we are instead going to talk about why there is a conspiracy case that has gone viral on social media. It has a bunch of flags and we address some reasons people sometimes break logic. And our friend Sarah Bleichfeld, LICSW joins us. This may be a little out of order because Sarah joins for a gaslighting episode later.
21 Sept 2026
Red Flag Romance- Heathcliff as a walking red flag in Wuthering Heights
In this episode we talk about the original rage bait called Wuthering Heights and how Heathcliff is a walking red flag. We break down how movies like this idealize these kinds of obsessive and codependent relationships as romantic instead of red flag. We also talk about some reasons people miss yellow flags in these kinds of relationships.
7 Sept 2026
Cultural Gaslighting, Minnesota Nice?
Sabrina Luciano and Brooke Donatone talk about Cultural Gaslighting with their first non-therapist guest! AJ Harper, a publishing strategist and co-host of the podcast, Don't Write that Book, brings insider knowledge about midwestern communication. This in-depth conversation addresses when conflict can't get resolved due to cultural differences in communication styles such as Minnesota nice versus New York directness.
Sadly, Lauren was stuck in parking hell and could not join us this time.
31 Aug 2026
Self-gaslighting, it's a thing
We are back from hiatus! We recorded this a while ago so Lauren talks about manifesting a Knicks win (before the final games). We also talk about self-gaslighting, which become the ways that we minimize and undermine our thoughts, opinions, and decisions. It's one of the reasons that we ignore red, orange, and yellow flags.
Hopefully we will teach you how to knock this off.
8 Jun 2026
Hiatus Hate Us
We are working hard on our Gaslighting series but need more time. Also, the weather has been gaslighting with 40 degrees one day and a record high of 90 degrees in May the next day.
Lauren is in parking hell, Sabrina microaggressed a midwesterner and Brooke did not microaggress Medusa.
No Gorgons were hurt in this recording. See you at the end of the summer.
25 May 2026
Introducing, Gaslighting!
Our friend, Sabrina Luciano, LCSW joins us to kick off our series about Gaslighting. We will talk about the red flags of course. However, there are times where gaslighting may be a yellow flag (accidental gaslighting) or communication differences that result in gaslighting but are not a warning signal for problems.
We also accidentally microaggress Medusa. #isMedusaaredflag?
11 May 2026
The toxicity of Toxic Positivity
We have our first guest on the show! We interview Sabrina Luciano, LCSW, a New York therapist who loves talking about toxic positivity. We also mention cults and of course get side-tracked into some horror movies. Find out about the red and yellow flags related to #positivevibes only.
Let the session begin.
Join the conversation by clicking Discussion - One Red Flag Podcast Group | Deliberate Psychothe (https://www.deliberatepsychotherapycollaborative.com/group/one-red-flag-podcast-group/discussion), then click join to join our group
20 Apr 2026
Effusive Too Fast Part 2
This is part 2 of Effusive Too Fast. We talk about the yellow flag of the conversation hijacker who is an example of someone that is effusive too fast. Find out how to spot this yellow flag and what to do when you encounter them. And thanks for being the best podcast audience ever (yes, an example of being effusive).
6 Apr 2026
Effusive Too Fast, Part 1
This is our first 2 part episode! We talk about the red flag of love bombers, yellow flag of too much too soon (or effusive too fast) and some of the brain chemistry that makes us do things we don't normally do when we are falling in love and lust. No neurochemicals were hurt in the production of this podcast.
MRI study citation: Verhallen AM, Renken RJ, Marsman JC, Ter Horst GJ. Working Memory Alterations After a Romantic Relationship Breakup. Front Behav Neurosci. 2021 Apr 9;15:657264. doi: 10.3389/fnbeh.2021.657264.
23 Mar 2026
Weaponized Incompetence
This episode is about Weaponized Incompetence—the act of pretending to be bad at a task so someone else will do it for you. Learn why this often involves dog poop and find out the tv show that Lauren actually saw (well, only a few episodes). Also please write to us and let us know why AI keeps correcting Weaponized Incompetence as Weaponizing Confidence.
9 Mar 2026
Drop in Session- Minisode
We answer our first listener mail question! We give some tips about how to identify yellow and red flags and confront these people when needed (if you should). You will also learn why Brooke acquired the nickname, "the terminator in college.
** no cyborgs were injured in the recording of this podcast.
23 Feb 2026
N of 1: Using one experience or example to make a decision
In this episode we go over one of the sneakiest red flags, we call N of 1.
This can be a yellow flag or a glaring red flag, and can skew how we think and make decisions. using a single, striking example to drive a huge decision or come up with a framework for ideas. This can cause us to have the wrong expectations, such as incorrectly expecting a person to always be supportive when they only demonstrated this one time. We also talk about the red flag of Lauren not knowing what a lavender latte is.
Please note that no lavender lattes were hurt in the recording of this podcast.
9 Feb 2026
Explanation vs Excuse
This episode explains the red and yellow flags or explanation vs excuse. And yes, I got stuck scrolling on social media for 3 hours and forgot to text you back is an excuse. Download this episode to hear about more excuses and how to deal with them when you get them from people.
28 Jan 2026
What are Red Flags?
Welcome to our first full length episode of One Red Flag! We talk about our system for identifying different colored flags in relationships and what makes a toxic versus just a problematic relationship.
4 Jan 2026
Minisode intro
Welcome to the One Red Flag podcast, hosted by two therapists who won't give you sad eyes. This is our first episode! We give a short overview of red and yellow flags in relationships and talk a little bit about what should be expected in our next episodes.
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Apple Podcasts (US)
5.0 / 5
9 ratings
Spotify
5.0 / 5
2 ratings
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