Being raised in a white evangelical church taught me to project perfection even when my life was falling apart. I was focused on appearing to have it all together while struggling slightly and alone. Today I am a wife, mother, career women and in the best mental, emotional, physical, and spiritual health of my life. The journey has been difficult and the work continues. Come with me as I unpack this journey and my transition from false perfection to real progress.
Congratulations Selah on 3 years of Sobriety!!!
In this episode, we share 2 stories where Selah had to confront White racial bias and racist talk. The first story happened in LA and was an instance of bias that was painfully familiar to Russell and was obvious and hurtful to Selah, Russ, and their daughters in real time. Next, Selah had to confront a individual who would single her out to share inappropriate racial charged comments and stories. In between the retelling of each of these stories, we share a brief clip from our friend Pastor Jimmy Rollins who gives us a principal for how to lovingly confront people even while having these difficult conversations.
This episode is sponsored by Jumla Network (//www.JumlaNetwork.com), a strategic consultancy and knowledge network focused on #diversity & #inclusion. Does your organization need a plan? Don't know where to start? Start here (https://www.jumlanetwork.com/contact)!
17 Nov 2022
More Progress & #GirlDad in the Ladies Room
Welcome back for Season 2!
2022 has been a full year for Selah, Russell and their family. Selah shares the highlights of her progress from this year and previews how we will go deeper in season two of this podcast. In a special bonus segment from the summer, Russell & Selah discuss how Russell takes their youngest daughter to the ladies room to go to the bathroom. Yes, Russell has gone into the ladies room y'all! We need feedback! Is this right and appropriate? Is the world and grandma ready for the #girldad going into the ladies room to help his daughter use the bathroom??? HELP US!! LOL
Follow us @progress_over_perfection_pod (https://www.instagram.com/progress_over_perfection_pod/) on IG and share your thoughts!
19 May 2022
I Understand That You're Angry
Over the last few years, and especially since COVID, there has been so much anger in our society. Many of us are frustrated and feel that we're losing control of our lives. As a result, many of us take our anger out in public, in the work place, or in shared spaces like airplanes and grocery stores. This week Selah and Russ share some of the anger they've seen and experienced and how they have attempted to show up in a way that "lowers the temperature" and brings love, kindness, and peace to people and a world in need. As always, Selah ends the episode with some encouraging tips and a short story that serves as a example of how we all, with a little forethought and intention, can share love and kindness.
Selah is 27 months sober and we continue to Selah-brate! Please make a donation to sobriety Club 164. (https://www.club164.org/)
This episode is brought to you by Jumla Network (http://jumlanetwork.com/) and Axeus Luxury Travel (https://www.axeustravel.com/).
10 Mar 2022
Why We Celebrate
This week, we share some of the highlights and insights from Selah's celebration of her 2 years of sobriety. We often think of celebrating as something that has to be extravagant or something we only do on birthdays and holidays. We discuss why it is important to celebrate sobriety milestones as well as how we can celebrate on a daily basis. Celebrating each other is so empowering. Selah's encouragement in this episode will help you shift how you think about celebrating.
Please make a donation to: www.Club164.org (https://www.club164.org/).
24 Feb 2022
Family Legacy
Selah starts this episode by sharing a bit about her family history and her initial insecurity when comparing it to Russell's rich family history. For Black History Month, Russell recently shared his story at a local high school and you'll hear the recording in this episode. Russell is a descendant of Henry Bakeman (https://www.findagrave.com/memorial/187066831/henry-bakeman), a free African who fought in the American Revolutionary War. As a result Russell is a member, Chaplain, 2nd Vice President and Past President of the Sons of the American Revolution (SAR) John Eager Howard Chapter (Baltimore, MD). Russell’s great-great grandfather Joseph M. Fugett escaped slavery during the civil war. He lived in Baldwinsville, NY where he opened his own blacksmith shop and held a US Patent (https://patents.google.com/patent/US393971A/en?oq=US+Patent+393%2c971). More recently, Russell’s late uncle Reginald F. Lewis (https://reginaldflewis.com/) founded the first African American owned law firm on Wall Street and in 1987 completed a $1 billion leveraged buyout of Beatrice International Foods.
As Selah has become a part of Russell's family, she shares how she has felt loved and seen as a result of her courage and pioneering spirit. We conclude with an encouragement that focuses on honoring the women who, while not included in Russell's presentation, deserve acknowledgement for the role they played in what was accomplished. And as Uncle Reg would say, we want you to "Keep Going No Matter What!"
This episode is sponsored by:
www.AxeusTravel.com (https://www.axeustravel.com/)
10 Feb 2022
Parenting Like Black Lives Matter
Today we had a conversation about parenting our mixed race- Black children in this season. We start by reflecting on how we thought about parenting when we began our family and discuss how things have changed over 8+ years and since the murder of George Floyd. Russell shares his experience of growing up with a mother who looked white and a step mother who is white and what it's been like to move from being a Black boy with white looking moms to being a Black dad with white looking children. We unpack some of the challenges our oldest daughter has already faced experiencing racism at 7 years old and the impact of our family's estrangement from Selah's family of origin which began with us confronting racism. We conclude with a message of encouragement for all parents and those who have the chance to show up and impact our children's lives.
This episode is sponsored by:
www.AxeusTravel.com (https://www.axeustravel.com/)
27 Jan 2022
The Power of Letting Go
Selah and Russ share how letting go of some relationships have brought healing, clarity and freedom from the chains of those relationships. Selah offers 6 steps that cover how you can identify, confront, and move on from relationships that no longer bear fruit. The fruits of the Spirit are: Kindness, Generosity, Joy, Charity, Self-Control, Faithfulness, Gentleness, Goodness, Peace, Patience, Humility & Righteousness. As always, Selah concludes with some encouragement. When you let go, you are making room for God to do a new thing.
This episode is sponsored by:
www.AxeusTravel.com (https://www.axeustravel.com/)
13 Jan 2022
How I'm Staying Sober
Selah tells us some of the tools and techniques she uses to stay sober. From AA meetings to discovering a new hobby, Selah shares how she has shifted her life and lifestyle to maintain her sobriety. She also shares some unexpected blessings that have resulted. As always, Selah and Russell end this episode with a dose of encouragement!
This episode is sponsored by:
www.AxeusTravel.com (https://www.axeustravel.com/)
9 Dec 2021
A Tool Kit For Your Sobriety Journey
Selah and Russell unpack some of the misconceptions of what it means to be an alcoholic. They describe the 5 types of alcoholics and how to recognize which one you or a loved one might be. Then they describe the various resources available for those who wish to begin their sobriety journey and share some of the things they had to learn in the process. At the end, Selah ends with a 3 part encouragement. Work It! You're Worth It!!!
This episode is sponsored by:
www.AxeusTravel.com (https://www.axeustravel.com/)
25 Nov 2021
Happy Friendsgiving!
On this episode we invite 6 special guest to share what they are thankful for. We also mix in some prayers and Thanksgiving thoughts from our daughters Paige and Natalie. Selah and Russell conclude by sharing what they are thankful for.
Happy Thanksgiving!
This episode is sponsored by:
www.AxeusTravel.com (https://www.axeustravel.com/)
11 Nov 2021
Hello. My Name is Selah and I'm an Alcoholic
In this episode, Selah shares her experience, strength, courage, and hope. Her prayer is that you can take something away that you can use or that you can use to encourage someone else. If you know someone who is struggling with addition or are concerned with a loved one's amount of drinking please share this episode with them.
This episode is sponsored by:
www.AxeusTravel.com (https://www.axeustravel.com/)
28 Oct 2021
Wife of an Entrepreneur
In this episode, we get to know Russell a little bit as he tells us his entrepreneurial backstory. Then Selah talks about what it’s like to be the wife of an entrepreneur. She shares how she has learned how to overcome difficulties while supporting her husband's dreams. Russell and Selah get vulnerable about what’s worked and what hasn’t. They share how they and their marriage have grown and matured and how they have been more partnered and invested in the success of Russell’s business. As always, Selah concludes with some encouragement about how to support and partner with your spouse in their entrepreneurial journey.
This episode is sponsored by:
www.AxeusTravel.com (https://www.axeustravel.com/)
14 Oct 2021
Third Time's The Charm
Selah finally meets the man of her dreams: her Boaz and guardian-redeemer. Selah shares her journey through an unexpected pregnancy and how God used the things she wanted most, a child and a family of her own, to bring her back to Him. Selah ends this episode with a beautiful hopeful message of encouragement.
This episode is sponsored by:
www.AxeusTravel.com (https://www.axeustravel.com/)
30 Sept 2021
Getting Skinny and Wild
After 2 divorces and drastic weight loss, Selah shares how feeling hurt and betrayed by God led her to seek attention and community in the wrong places. She discusses how she exchanged obesity and lack of physical health for partying, drinking, and attention from men which lead to poor spiritual and emotional health. Selah concludes with a word to encourage all of us to reclaim our story and take our power back so we can overcome shame and grow.
This episode is sponsored by:
www.AxeusTravel.com (https://www.axeustravel.com/)
16 Sept 2021
My Second Marriage
Selah continues sharing her story by discussing how she met her second husband. She tells us about health issues that lead to infertility, being a foster mom, and how her being married to a habitual cheater led to the end of her second marriage. Throughout it all, the pressure to portray perfection remained a driving force that led to hurt. In her encouragement, Selah reminds us that in the end, as always, there’s hope and love on the other side.
This episode is sponsored by:
www.AxeusTravel.com (https://www.axeustravel.com/)
2 Sept 2021
My First Marriage
Selah continues sharing her biographical journey and story by discussing how she graduated high school and moved out of her parents house before age 18. She goes on to share about meeting her first husband and his struggles with addiction that ultimately led to that marriage ending in divorce. Selah concludes with a word of encouragement for women and all people who are in the midst of divorce or continue to struggle with the pain caused by divorce and addiction.
If your friend or loved one is struggling with addiction and you need help and support, please visit https://al-anon.org/ (https://al-anon.org/)
This episode is sponsored by:
www.AxeusTravel.com (https://www.axeustravel.com/)
19 Aug 2021
Burned In The Middle
In this first episode, Selah and Russell discuss why Selah started this podcast. Then we get autobiographic. Selah shares about her family and growing up as the middle child in Hyattsville, MD. She tells the story of an accident that happened when she was an infant and the resulting trauma and the miracle of her healing. Selah shares all this in the contexts of growing up in a predominately white evangelical Christian church. As we'll conclude every episode, Selah shares a word of encouragement!
This episode is sponsored by:
www.AxeusTravel.com (https://www.axeustravel.com/)
5 Aug 2021
Trailer
Welcome to Progress over Perfection! Please subscribe and share.
3 Aug 2021
Progress Over Perfection (Trailer)
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4.7 / 5
12 ratings
Spotify
5.0 / 5
1 ratings
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