by Gijs van Breugel
I’m Gijs. This is Real Therapy. I speak about what actually happens outside the therapy room. The moments where life doesn’t slow down, and you still have to live inside yourself. No tips. No methods. No fixing. Just real situations, spoken out loud, as they are.
Language
🇺🇲
Publishing Since
1/15/2026
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March 19, 2026
<p><strong>Myths and truths about institutional abuse</strong></p><p><strong>When “Stress” Isn’t the Right Name</strong></p><p><br></p><p>A professional environment can look respectable and still dismantle someone from the inside.</p><p>In this episode, I examine how institutional abuse often gets misread as stress or burnout. Not because the symptoms are wrong, but because the structure behind them is missed.</p><p>We look at:</p><p>– How harm can occur through procedures, language, and repeated small overrides</p><p>– Why confusion is often built into the experience</p><p>– The myths that keep people doubting their own perception</p><p>– The difference between adaptation and safety</p><p><br></p><p>This is not about turning every difficult system into abuse.</p><p>It is about recognising when reality has been repeatedly overridden — and what that leaves behind.</p>
March 13, 2026
<p>Still functioning is not the same as Living your full life</p><p><br></p><p>When someone tells me they’re still functioning, that does not reassure me very much.</p><p><br></p><p>It tells me they are still moving. Still managing. Still sounding coherent enough that nobody gets worried.</p><p><br></p><p>But functioning is not the same as health.</p><p><br></p><p>In this episode, I look at the quieter form of depletion that often gets missed: </p><p>When life is still running from the outside, but something underneath has started withdrawing. </p><p>When pleasure no longer lands. When rest no longer restores. When competence is no longer being used to live, but to keep the structure upright for one more day.</p><p><br></p><p>This is not a generic burnout episode.</p><p><br></p><p>It is not advice about boundaries, better routines, or taking a weekend off, a self-help list...</p><p><br></p><p>It is a structural look at what functioning may be protecting — and what it can cost when reliability becomes a hiding place.</p>
March 4, 2026
<p>“Do you do EMDR?”</p><p><br></p><p>It’s one of the most common first questions in therapy.</p><p><br></p><p>It makes sense. When you’re struggling, you want something that works. You want certainty. You want to reduce the risk of wasting time.</p><p>But a method is a tool. And tools come after we understand what we’re dealing with.</p><p>In this episode, I examine why starting with the method can quietly distract from structural assessment. One overwhelming event is not the same as years of adaptive survival patterns — even if both are labelled “trauma.”</p><p>We look at:</p><p>– Why symptom similarity does not mean structural similarity</p><p>– The difference between single-incident trauma and developmental adaptation</p><p>– Why choosing a method first can create false clarity</p><p>– Why assessment must precede intervention</p><p><br></p><p>This is not a critique of EMDR.</p><p>It is a clarification of sequence : </p><p>Understanding first.</p><p>Tool second.</p>
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I’m Gijs.
This is Real Therapy.
I speak about what actually happens outside the therapy room. The moments where life doesn’t slow down, and you still have to live inside yourself.
No tips. No methods. No fixing.
Just real situations, spoken out loud, as they are.
This podcast updates daily.
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