It’s finally time us men had our own romance novels. St. James St. James is the greatest sexual icon in the history of the world. He bones hard, is completely unapologetic, and probably f**ked your grandma. These stories are just as horrific and awe-inducing as you can imagine. You’re welcome.
Host John Smith explores the thrilling intersection of crime and romance in this captivating interview.
21 Dec 2022
Chapter 12 - St. James Kills Everyone
Ron finally redeems himself by telling St. James where the Mayor is and all hell breaks loose. Will St. James survive or will he kill the everyone in sight. Maybe the title gives it away. Oh well.
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14 Dec 2022
Chapter 11 - An Ironic Title When You're Rich
St. James St. James is back being rich baby! But being rich has its price, as he does too much opium and rules the town with an iron fist. The Mayor retaliates and may or may not have killed his entire family. Whoopsie.
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6 Dec 2022
Chapter 10 - Craziest Orgy EVER
St. James St. James finally realizes his dream of opening up a "Polite Whorehouse And Opium Den" and to celebrate, he obviously hosts a huge orgy inside his barn that turns way out of control.
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29 Nov 2022
Chapter 9 - China Is My F**king Jam
St. James St. James arrives in China only to be greeted by copious amounts of opium, orgies, and endless hibachi. It's the experience of a lifetime... or 7 years. He becomes rich once again.
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23 Nov 2022
Chapter 8 - Queef Mittens
St. James St. James is finally able to go back to a whorehouse, but is unhappy with a gift from one of the prostitutes. He also realizes he needs to become a drug dealer to become reich again, so he plans to set sail for China... for opium.
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16 Nov 2022
Chapter 7 - St. James St. James Goes To Jail
Our hero St. James St. James gets sentenced to jail where he kills a Mexican, continues to have sex with multiple women and possibly one dude. When he finally gets out, he realizes he is completely broke and must do something quick... because he'd rather die than be poor again.
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9 Nov 2022
Chapter 6 - Sex On Top OF My Dead Son’s Casket
St. James St. James gets caught having sex on top of his dead son's casket at his funeral... and it isn't his wife. The Marshall's finally catch up to him and take him to prison, where he continues to have more sex. It's kind of amazing.
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1 Nov 2022
Chapter 5 - Being Poor Sucks
St. James St. James is now poor and must cope with his new reality... that he has to dig through human sh*t to pay for his son's funeral. He can't even afford a decent HJ from a whorehouse. Dark times.
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26 Oct 2022
Chapter 4 - They Dipped My Son In Gold
St. James St. James son Totally F**king Mexico dies tragically after being kidnapped and dipped into scalding hot gold. He then f**ks his next door neighbor's wife in front of him for revenge.
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18 Oct 2022
Chapter 3 - An Impromptu Bukkake Sesh
St. James St. James realizes he might no longer be the richest man in town and is forced to participate in an impromtu bukkake session as he meets the men responsible for the invention of Goldschlager.
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11 Oct 2022
Chapter 2 - I Cheat On My Wife, So What?
St. James St. James returns from the whorehouse with gold and a decent erection. Does his wife know he cheated on her? Yup. Who cares, losers. It's the 1800's. Men did sh*t like that. Deal with it.
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11 Oct 2022
Chapter 1 - Being Rich Is F**king Awesome
Welcome to the exquisite life of St. James St. James, where being poor is for losers, so obviously I skip over that part of my existence and just get to me being rad and banging prostitutes. It's 1849, I find a sh*t ton of gold and visit my favorite whorehouse to celebrate my wealth. I'll go back to my wife and kids eventually.
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26 Jul 2022
Romance Novel For Dudes Trailer
St. James St. James takes you on the sexual exploration of a lifetime. You're graced to be in his presence. You definitely would have boned him.
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Inside a recent episode
Chapter 13 - Crime Time
Published 18 Aug 2026 · Transcript excerpt
[…] And like, why are they talking to her right there? But anyway, at that point, Brendan, Brendan was still upstairs with Christine. Okay. When they arrived, he was, he was still trying to stop the bleeding. Okay. While Giuliano was questioned outside, officers made their way upstairs to the master bedroom. […]
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