Hosted by La Toya, a licensed therapist-turned-creator, Say More About That helps high-functioning Black women set unapologetic boundaries, navigate emotional burnout, and reconnect with their authentic selves. Tune in for sharp insights, soft truths, and healing that moves with you—literally. New episodes every Monday!! Let’s talk about it.
In this episode of Say More About That, La Toya discusses the pattern of becoming “the strong friend” everyone relies on for support without reciprocity, distinguishing it from mutually beneficial relationships.
She explains how this role accumulates over time through reliability and early conditioning, then becomes an expectation that others stop questioning.
She outlines the costs—persistent exhaustion, resentment that shows up as irritability or withdrawal, loneliness even when surrounded by people, and the performance of appearing fine while overwhelmed—alongside internal beliefs like “I can handle it,” “If I fall apart, everything falls apart,” “asking for help means failing,” and “I don’t want to be a burden.”
La Toya encourages noticing imbalance, practicing letting others show up, and journaling who knows the real truth of how you’re doing and why it may feel unsafe to share.
Stay connected...
Instagram @livinlatoya (https://www.instagram.com/latoyathetherapist/)
TikTok- @toya.the.thrpst (https://www.tiktok.com/@toya.the.thrpst)
Newsletter and other links (https://www.mrstoyacarter.com/instagrampage?fbclid=PAZXh0bgNhZW0CMTEAAabOqca55wFDZbFgvPnjHUV2yIgOd0loQIbtl0BB20XgTiRR7bwV-WGZQm4_aem_Wv9DltEsBi999Oz8vLD6kg)
Email- hello@latoyathetherapist.com
To learn more about La Toya visit her website (https://www.mrstoyacarter.com/)
00:00 Welcome and Topic Setup
00:45 Defining the Strong Friend
01:33 How You Became the Go-To
02:47 When Strength Becomes Expectation
04:50 The Real Costs
06:32 Loneliness and Staying Polished
10:22 The Inner Scripts Keeping You Stuck
13:49 Redefining Burden and Friendship
15:15 Building Real Reciprocity
18:09 Journal Prompt and Closing
18 Aug 2025
Say More About Boundary Burnout
Understanding and Combating Boundary Burnout
In this episode of 'Say More About That,' host La Toya delves into the concept of boundary burnout—a form of emotional fatigue experienced after setting and maintaining boundaries. She explains that this exhaustion often arises from breaking old habits, managing both your emotions and those of others, and lacking recovery time.
La Toya provides practical steps to combat this burnout, including starting with small boundaries, scripting responses, planning recovery time, and expecting resistance. She concludes by emphasizing the importance of mental recovery to sustain healthy boundaries and protect one's peace.
Stay connected...
Get the FREE Soft Return (https://latoyathetherapist.myflodesk.com/softreturn) email challenge HERE (https://latoyathetherapist.myflodesk.com/softreturn).
Support the show on Patreon. (patreon.com/SayMoreCrew)
Instagram @livinlatoya (https://www.instagram.com/latoyathetherapist/)
TikTok- @toya.the.thrpst (https://www.tiktok.com/@toya.the.thrpst)
Newsletter and other links (https://www.mrstoyacarter.com/instagrampage?fbclid=PAZXh0bgNhZW0CMTEAAabOqca55wFDZbFgvPnjHUV2yIgOd0loQIbtl0BB20XgTiRR7bwV-WGZQm4_aem_Wv9DltEsBi999Oz8vLD6kg)
Email- hello@latoyathetherapist.com
To learn more about La Toya visit her website (https://www.mrstoyacarter.com/)
00:00 Introduction to Boundary Burnout
00:42 Defining Boundary Burnout
02:51 Reasons for Boundary Burnout
05:22 Strategies to Combat Boundary Burnout
08:26 Recovery Techniques
10:10 Final Thoughts and Encouragement
4 Aug 2025
Say More About Embracing True Authenticity in Your Life
Unpacking the Emotional Weight of Self-Abandonment
In this episode of 'Say More About That,' La Toya explores the emotional consequences of making choices that don't truly resonate with one's authentic self.
She discusses the concept of core beliefs, particularly the belief of not being enough, and how it leads to self-abandonment in pursuit of external validation.
The episode delves into the importance of identifying and challenging these beliefs, rewriting them, and aligning actions with one's true self. Practical steps are provided for beginning this deep emotional work, aiming to cultivate a life filled with choices that genuinely reflect who you are.
If you have not done so already, please subscribe and comment Today.
Stay connected...
Get the FREE Soft Return (https://latoyathetherapist.myflodesk.com/softreturn) email challenge HERE (https://latoyathetherapist.myflodesk.com/softreturn).
Support the show on Patreon. (patreon.com/SayMoreCrew)
Instagram @livinlatoya (https://www.instagram.com/latoyathetherapist/)
TikTok- @toya.the.thrpst (https://www.tiktok.com/@toya.the.thrpst)
Newsletter and other links (https://www.mrstoyacarter.com/instagrampage?fbclid=PAZXh0bgNhZW0CMTEAAabOqca55wFDZbFgvPnjHUV2yIgOd0loQIbtl0BB20XgTiRR7bwV-WGZQm4_aem_Wv9DltEsBi999Oz8vLD6kg)
Email- hello@latoyathetherapist.com
To learn more about La Toya visit her website (https://www.mrstoyacarter.com/)
00:00 Introduction and Episode Overview
00:10 The Trap of Self-Abandonment
01:35 Understanding Core Beliefs
02:35 Steps to Change Core Beliefs
03:41 Living Authentically
07:20 Questions for Self-Reflection
Reach and audience
Public platform figures. Ratings count people who left a rating, not total listeners.
Apple Podcasts (US)
5.0 / 5
4 ratings
Spotify
5.0 / 5
4 ratings
Podcast Authority Score: 43 / 100
A composite of feed quality, social presence, YouTube performance and engagement. Read the methodology.
Quality
61
Social presence
0
YouTube
0
Engagement
60
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