Standing in Two Worlds with Doctor Sam Juni

About Standing in Two Worlds with Doctor Sam Juni

Standing in Two Worlds with Doctor Sam Juni

Publisher

JewishPodcasts.fm

Category

religion & spirituality

Language

en

Explicit

No

First episode

26 Jan 2021

Latest episode

22 Aug 2025

Latest episodes

52 episodes in the feed.

1. 

   22 Aug 2025

   Inyanei Nefoshos-Rav Shmuel Skaist-From Rosh Yeshiva to Credentialed Addiction Therapist

   Please click on this link to contribute whatever you can to keep this podcast on the air: https://thechesedfund.com/yeshivaofnewarkpodcast/keeping-the-ark-afloat This podcast has been graciously sponsored by JewishPodcasts.fm. There is much overhead to maintain this service so please help us continue our goal of helping Jewish lecturers become podcasters and support us with a donation: https://thechesedfund.com/jewishpodcasts/donate

2. 

   6 Sept 2024

   Stark Honesty-The initial artifice of courtship must give way to revealing the warts of personality-with Rabbi Shmuel Skaist LPC, CSAT

   Please click on this link to contribute whatever you can to keep this podcast on the air: https://thechesedfund.com/yeshivaofnewarkpodcast/keeping-the-ark-afloat (https://thechesedfund.com/yeshivaofnewarkpodcast/keeping-the-ark-afloat) With downloads approaching the million mark-and an archival library numbering in the thousands, the Yeshiva of Newark Podcast has been striving to continuously upgrade our content, and professionalize our audio sound, along with altering approaches in light of much appreciated listener feedback. A niche has been carved out that resonates with many on the wide spectrum of Observant Jews. This explains why we continually rank high in independent on-line lists of top Yeshiva podcasts. This proud edifice is in real danger of toppling and disappearing. We need the help of our listeners to continue to record and edit, and to promote a product that has been a balm and instructive to so many. Just 36 dollars, a minimum donation, from a thousand of you out there will keep us afloat as a New Ark of straight, intelligent, and humorous discussion, lectures, debate and inquiry - while the destructive waters of ignorance and politics crash around us. Episode 80: Lack of Transparency in Marriage & Its Repercussions Rabbis Skaist and Kivelevitz join Prof. Juni in a brainstorming panel discussion about a common source of marital difficulties in traditional orthodox religious culture. R. Kivelevitz describes the initial contrived dating experience as one in which each partner presents deceptively as perfect and in line with prescribed ideals. The discussants agree that this mode is a harbinger of consistent misrepresentations in the future of resulting relationships. R. Skaist notes that the reality of the culture is such that initial transparency during dating would inevitably lead the other partner to abort the relationship before it develops. He deplores that mentors in the system explicitly advise those dating to avoid sharing information that might lower their image. Moreover, there is no timeline for the introduction of transparency into the budding relationship at all. Sharing his experience as a mentor and Dayan (member of a religious court), R. Kivelevitz reports that this situation is a major contributor to sexual and intimacy difficulties in marriages. It is further exacerbated by the dissonance between the self-professed lofty (and unrealistic) views espoused during the dating experiences and the reality that most orthodox couples violate the official proscriptions against intimacy during their dating experience to some degree. Markedly, these couples often proceed into a marriage where the discrepancy between ideals and behavior is never discussed. Dr. Juni suggests that many of these difficulties could be avoided if educators and mentors in the system advise transparency during the dating process with the explicit messages that… a) no one’s reality matches the ideal (i.e., everyone has several skeletons in his/her closet); and b) lack of transparency is bound to harm (and possibly explode) any long-term relationship. Thus, it is not a question of “whether”your prospective partner has weaknesses or liabilities (just as you do), but rather “what” those liabilities are. Juni stresses that the Yeshiva culture does not share the Western mental health attitude which values transparency in relationships. Specifically, It is OK to live a positively motivated lie if you can pull it off – be it the fact that you are on certain medications, you watch pornography occasionally, you engage in illegal betting occasionally, or that you have an arrest record. R. Skaist discusses the dynamics of Betrayal Trauma which occurs when one discovers deception that has been perpetrated by a spouse. Noting that this is seen as a clinical lack of integrity and a devaluation of the other, he stresses that such betrayal is classified as a form of abuse by martial experts. Drawing on his experience with troubled couples, R. Kivelevitz adds that the “perpetrators” of such abuse are often unaware that their past has been problematic, and are surprised when it begins to cause marital strife. What constitutes marital abuse? Juni insists that any consensual behavior is not considered abusive regardless of the values that may be violated. However,difficulties with this criterion, as applied to the orthodox Jewish culture, are raised by the discussants. R. Kivelevitz notes Halachic prescriptions and proscriptions in the areas of sexuality as examples. R. Skaist notes that the culture explicitly calls for the wife’s submission to the husband’s proclivities. R. Kivelevitz also points to “soft coercion” tactics (e.g. manipulation, incessant pleading, inducing guilt trips, etc.) as gray areas in defining abuse. R. Soloveitchik’s treatise on Halachic Courage is discussed, as R. Kivelevitz applies that idea as giving priority to halachic obligations over emotional needs. R. Skaist argues that while such a notion may exist as an ideal one may personally strive towards, one who “demands” such a sacrifice from a spouse is definitely committing abuse. Based on his experiences with couples suing for divorce, R. Kivelevitz notes that, even on a personal level, striving toward such lofty ideals if one is not at such a sublime spiritual level (which includes almost all folks) typically engenders significant psychiatric damage to an individual. Taking up the issue of whether abusers can change, R. Kivelevitz raises the notions of Teshuva (repentance) while R. Skaist points to significant behavioral changes evidenced by recovering addicts. Dr. Juni, however, insists on drawing the line between character flaws that pertain to oneself (which may be ameliorated by psychological/psychiatric intervention) vs. flaws in interpersonal relations which are predicated by a functional lack of integrity of the other. He is adamant that abusers will continue to abuse – even if the abuse frequency is moderated by genuine guilt, repentance, and various medical or counseling interventions. R. Skaist points out that in Yeshiva culture spouses are often loathe to dissolve abusive relationships for social and religious reasons. The discussants agree that interventions to mitigate abuse are warranted in such cases – even if abuse may not be eliminated entirely. It is clear, however, that transparency is the key to the relative success of such efforts. Indeed, R. Kivelevitz reports that “confessions” by one spouse about his/her handicaps often prompt reciprocal “confessions’ from the other spouse as well. When this occurs, mental health professionals may then attempt to work with the couple to shift into a relationship mode predicated on the notion that neither spouse is perfect, as they help the couple explore a viable living arrangement where the hurt is minimized and positive experiences are enhanced. Prof. Juni is one of the foremost research psychologists in the world today. He has published ground-breaking original research in seventy different peer reviewed journals and is cited continuously with respect by colleagues and experts in the field who have built on his theories and observations. He studied in Yeshivas Chaim Berlin under Rav Yitzchak Hutner, and in Yeshiva University as a Talmid of Rav Joseph Dov Soloveitchik. Dr. Juni is a board member of the Association of Orthodox Jewish Scientists and has regularly presented addresses to captivated audiences. Associated with NYU since 1979, Juni has served as Director of PhD programs, all the while heading teams engaged in cutting-edge research. Professor Juni's scholarship on aberrant behavior across the cultural, ethnic, and religious spectrum is founded on psychometric methodology and based on a psychodynamic psychopathology perspective. He is arguably the preeminent expert in Differential Diagnostics, with each of his myriad studies entailing parallel efforts in theory construction and empirical data collection from normative and clinical populations. Professor Juni created and directed the NYU Graduate Program in Tel Aviv titled Cross-Cultural Group Dynamics in Stressful Environments. Based in Yerushalayim, he collaborates with Israeli academic and mental health specialists in the study of dissonant factors and tensions in the Arab-Israeli conflict and those within the Orthodox Jewish community, while exploring personality challenges of second-generation Holocaust survivors. Below is a partial list of the professional journals where Professor Juni has published 120 theoretical articles and his research findings (many are available online): Journal of Forensic Psychology; Journal of Aggression, Maltreatment, and Trauma; International Review of Victimology; The Journal of Nervous and Mental Disease; International Forum of Psychoanalysis; Journal of Personality Assessment; Journal of Abnormal Psychology; Journal of Psychoanalytic Anthropology; Psychophysiology; Psychology and Human Development; Journal of Sex Research; Journal of Psychology and Judaism; Contemporary Family Therapy; American Journal on Addictions; Journal of Criminal Psychology; Mental Health, Religion, and Culture. As Rosh Beis Medrash, Rabbi Avraham Kivelevitz serves as Rav and Posek for the morning minyan at IDT. Hundreds of listeners around the globe look forward to his weekly Shiurim in Tshuvos and Poskim and Gaonic Literature. Rav Kivelevitz is a Maggid Shiur for Dirshu International in Talmud and Halacha as well as a Dayan with the Beth Din of America. This podcast has been graciously sponsored by JewishPodcasts.fm. There is much overhead to maintain this service so please help us continue our goal of helping Jewish lecturers become podcasters and support us with a donation: https://thechesedfund.com/jewishpodcasts/donate

3. 

   24 May 2024

   The Hostage's Permanent Psychological Damage Explained

   Please click on this link to contribute whatever you can to keep this podcast on the air: https://thechesedfund.com/yeshivaofnewarkpodcast/keeping-the-ark-afloat (https://thechesedfund.com/yeshivaofnewarkpodcast/keeping-the-ark-afloat) With downloads approaching the million mark-and an archival library numbering in the thousands, the Yeshiva of Newark Podcast has been striving to continuously upgrade our content, and professionalize our audio sound, along with altering approaches in light of much appreciated listener feedback. A niche has been carved out that resonates with many on the wide spectrum of Observant Jews. This explains why we continually rank high in independent on-line lists of top Yeshiva podcasts. This proud edifice is in real danger of toppling and disappearing. We need the help of our listeners to continue to record and edit, and to promote a product that has been a balm and instructive to so many. Just 36 dollars, a minimum donation, from a thousand of you out there will keep us afloat as a New Ark of straight, intelligent, and humorous discussion, lectures, debate and inquiry - while the destructive waters of ignorance and politics crash around us. Rehabilitation Challenges of Gaza Hostages and Traumatized Battle Veterans Trauma shakes up the personality and,sometimes, the very essence of its victims. Interpersonal trauma, moreover,often harms the capacity for healthy social and personal relationships which persists long after the traumatic episode. Prof. Juni explains the dynamics of these lasting effects of trauma by noting that the life of an infant is usually construed by the growing child as a very threatening existence fraught with colossal danger, interspersed by facets of ultimate pleasure and safety/security. This fixes the infant into a chronic state of anxiety where the stakes are most extreme. The concomitant behavioral stance of the child devolves into a fight vs. flight modality, as the other is perceived dichotomously as devoted friends vs. ferocious foe, demon vs. and saint vs.devil/angel. As the child develops, behaviors,stances, and attitudes moderate. Gray usurps black vs. white polarities, and extremist percepts are defensively repressed as they recede into the unconscious -- to find expression only in the dreams of older children and adults. Alas, subsequent trauma has the capacity to disrupt the mature defensive ego structure and often results in regression into the original terror-filled world of danger and extreme dichotomy. Juni likens the rehabilitated traumatized soldier or hostage to a recovered alcoholic who might slip right back to full-blown alcoholism – even many years later -- if his/her defensive wall is breached when forced to have “just one drink.” Hostages who experience threat and abuse in close quarters with perpetrators have been noted to exhibit the Stockholm Syndrome. Dr. Juni delineates the hallmarks of this syndrome which prompt some victims to “side with their captors.” Such dynamics may include identification with the aggressor and acceptance of abuse as justified. Juni agrees with Rabbi Kivelevitz that such a stance may sometimes be psychologically rooted in an effort to minimize the perceived threat one experiences. It is clear that this syndrome will make it difficult for a hostage to adjust functionally to social and family functioning. Rabbi Kivelevitz points out a number of parallels between the reactions of soldiers and hostages to those of holocaust victims (who went on to be prominent political leaders, clergy, and visionaries), arguing that such observed resilience should be expected among traumatized soldiers and hostages. Dr. Juni, while agreeing with the parallel, nonetheless insists that despite the potential for adequate functioning among these groups, there is an underlying intrinsic damage to personality and ego structure which remains as a weak link which may unravel in stressful contexts. Drawing from his clinical work with spousal abuse, Juni shares an additional dynamic specifically relevant to hostages who were forced into sexual intimacy with their captors. In situations of conflation between extreme threat and sexuality, there is apparently a breakdown of specificity in interpersonal relationship functioning which results in a positive attachment to the perpetrator. This accounts for the marked difficulty of abused domestic partners to leave their abusers, just as it results in positive affinity of abused hostages toward their traumatizers. Rabbi Kivelevitz points to the Biblical story of Dinah, whom the Midrash describes as adamantly professing her “love” of her abuser, Shechem. Juni mentions a cultural parallel in contemporary Arab culture, citing a recent court case in an Afghani court where an abuse victim sued that her rapist be forced to marry her. Juni discusses a novel manifestation of the Stockholm syndrome he has observed, where family members of killed hostages have become proponents of the perspective of the Hamas perpetrators. Dynamically, this can be construed as a defensive effort to “make sense” of the specter of senseless atrocities which confronts them. Rabbi Kivelevitz argues that Israelis have existed with an undercurrent of national trauma ever since the nation was founded and still have among the highest “happiness index” ratings worldwide. As such, they should be most primed to assimilate and rehabilitate traumatized soldiers and repatriated hostages. Juni agrees that this resilience – which is a defensive manifestation of splitting (a psychological adaptation which enables positive functioning despite strong negative and threatening factors) –is indeed an adaptive facet of Israeli function which augers well for the rehabilitation of these individuals. Juni asserts that the Trauma Rehabilitation Mental Health structure is in place in Israel, and should be able to handle the expected influx of patients/clients. He notes that a concerted effort will be required to counter the Israeli zip-your-lip mentality which militates against victims’ admitting their fears and vulnerabilities. Touching upon the respective mentalities of Israelis and Hamas, both discussants agree that a primary difference exists between the Israeli’s devout allegiance to the worth of each individual and the Hamas stance which ignores the individual in the service of its cause. Alas, the Israeli stance is well understood by the adversaries, allowing them to use it to Israel’s disadvantage in their terrorism and hostage taking ventures. Prof. Juni is one of the foremost research psychologists in the world today. He has published ground-breaking original research in seventy different peer reviewed journals and is cited continuously with respect by colleagues and experts in the field who have built on his theories and observations. He studied in Yeshivas Chaim Berlin under Rav Yitzchak Hutner, and in Yeshiva University as a Talmid of Rav Joseph Dov Soloveitchik. Dr. Juni is a board member of the Association of Orthodox Jewish Scientists and has regularly presented addresses to captivated audiences. Associated with NYU since 1979, Juni has served as Director of PhD programs, all the while heading teams engaged in cutting-edge research. Professor Juni's scholarship on aberrant behavior across the cultural, ethnic, and religious spectrum is founded on psychometric methodology and based on a psychodynamic psychopathology perspective. He is arguably the preeminent expert in Differential Diagnostics, with each of his myriad studies entailing parallel efforts in theory construction and empirical data collection from normative and clinical populations. Professor Juni created and directed the NYU Graduate Program in Tel Aviv titled Cross-Cultural Group Dynamics in Stressful Environments. Based in Yerushalayim, he collaborates with Israeli academic and mental health specialists in the study of dissonant factors and tensions in the Arab-Israeli conflict and those within the Orthodox Jewish community, while exploring personality challenges of second-generation Holocaust survivors. Below is a partial list of the professional journals where Professor Juni has published 120 theoretical articles and his research findings (many are available online): Journal of Forensic Psychology; Journal of Aggression, Maltreatment, and Trauma; International Review of Victimology; The Journal of Nervous and Mental Disease; International Forum of Psychoanalysis; Journal of Personality Assessment; Journal of Abnormal Psychology; Journal of Psychoanalytic Anthropology; Psychophysiology; Psychology and Human Development; Journal of Sex Research; Journal of Psychology and Judaism; Contemporary Family Therapy; American Journal on Addictions; Journal of Criminal Psychology; Mental Health, Religion, and Culture. As Rosh Beis Medrash, Rabbi Avraham Kivelevitz serves as Rav and Posek for the morning minyan at IDT. Hundreds of listeners around the globe look forward to his weekly Shiurim in Tshuvos and Poskim and Gaonic Literature. Rav Kivelevitz is a Maggid Shiur for Dirshu International in Talmud and Halacha as well as a Dayan with the Beth Din of America.

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