Those who can't do; teach.
Those who can't teach, teach P.E.
And when all else fails start a Podcast.
Join amateur Sue Sylvester impersonator, Lauren Order and her "Friend" Diana Whole. As these two Prophetic Drag Queens venture through the cultural zeitgeist and deliberate on what passes the great universal equaliser The Beep Test.
Artwork provided by Sophie Hill.
Music provided by Jackson Miles.
Diana and Lauren discuss how music festivals will rank on the Beep Test, reflecting on their own festival experiences and the challenges of festival planning.
26 Nov 2024
EPISODE 13 - ITS MY SPECIAL DAY
Faculty members Diana and Lauren reminisce about their favorite birthday memories, highlighting the importance of nostalgia and self-discovery.
19 Nov 2024
EPISODE 12 - A SUBSTANTIAL VIDEO ESSAY
It's raining this week. So your two favourite faculty members have decided to bring the listeners inside and watch a movie as a lesson replacement.
Diana has wheeled in the TV with the VHS player and Lauren cannot make arse or tails of the cables for it!
Will they watch the movie?
Will Lauren choke on the cables?
Find out now!!!
12 Nov 2024
EPISODE 11 - PLAYING MUMMIES AND DADDIES WITH DUO THE OWL
Lauren's BACK!! And not a moment too soon!
This week there are staff shortages in the languages department.
Diana is stuck in an endless loop of reintroducing herself every time a giant green owl goes ‘Whoooo!’
Whilst Lauren is letting her body do all the talking for a change.
5 Nov 2024
EPISODE 10 - AFAB-ULOUS EPISODE W/ BARBI GHANOUSH
This week Lauren managed to break free from the restraints of her cell the E.P.A. were keeping her in. After a short battle with the guards she was free from the compound and now needs to make it back home quickly!
Meanwhile hundreds of thousands of miles away, Diana has completely forgotten all memory of Lauren Order and has now invited life long Netball Umpire (lesbian) Barbi Ghanoush (@barbi.ghanoush) to help with with this weeks listeners.
29 Oct 2024
EPISODE 9 - HYPER-POP THAT PUSS WITH MICHELLE MAYHEM
This week Lauren was taken in the night by a nameless government agency (E.P.A.) To an undisclosed location where she was forced to reveal state secrets she may or may not have known.
Meanwhile, Back in the staff room Diana calls on the help of Substitute Music Teacher, Michelle Mayhem (@michellemayhemdq) to help with this weeks episode.
Will Lauren make it home?
Will Michelle leave a good impression on the listeners?
Will Diana finish a thought?
Tune in to find out!!
22 Oct 2024
EPISODE 8 - FAR FAR AWAY IDOL
Your favourite faculty members are back from a much needed School Holidays!!!
Diana explored the Northern Rivers and South East Queensland.
Whilst Lauren has been stuck watching the same Pop Idol fail video for 3 weeks.
30 Sept 2024
EPISODE 7 - H.R. SUN, LEGAL MOON, FINANCE RISING
This week Faculty members Lauren and Diana are feeling the pinch.
Lauren concerned with holding interest rates and global inflation decided to get a second job. As the Governor of the Reserve Bank of Australia.
Whilst Diana, had a large lunch and needs to take off her elasticised pants.
20 Sept 2024
EPISODE 6 - SUBTWEETING IN AIRPLANE MODE FT. AMYL
This week, Lauren and Diana take a lesson on Aeronautical Engineering! Provided by RPDU Season 3 contestant and All too recent meat tray winner Amyl!
13 Sept 2024
EPISODE 5 - SPRING CLEANING: HOW TO LOSE THE WINTER WEIGHT - A DOG GROOMERS GUIDE
Spring has sprung! Your two favourite P.E. faculty members have stopped to smell the roses. Lauren is reminiscing on new found love, whilst Diana saw God during an anaphylactic reaction.
7 Sept 2024
EPISODE 4 - THE DIVAS
After a rather torturous week of D.I.V.A preparations for Lauren and Diana. The ladies kick their feet up and discuss all things D.I.V.As
Diana, discusses the intricacies and nuances of Sydney's rich drag history and culture.
Whilst Lauren, reveals she talked to a pensioner!
22 Aug 2024
EPISODE 3 - SHAWSHANK RUDEMPTION; ESCAPE FROM BOAT PARTY JAIL
Feeling somewhat overwhelmed by their premiere the 'ladies' treat themselves to a relaxing week of some of their favourite things.
Lauren takes an Al Jeezer-ian journalistic examination of Boat Parties, whist Diana can't get off the train.
14 Aug 2024
EPISODE 2 - P&P CRUISE WITH SOPHIA LE RUN
Big changes for the faculty in the P.E. Department this week. Lauren has relocated to Sydney! And with the exciting prospect of change comes the agonising challenge of moving. A Beep Test in its own right. Diana is reminiscing on the joys of a Euro Summer.
12 Aug 2024
EPISODE 1 - THE WARM UP WITH BROWYN BISHOP, GENIS, AND THE BEIJING OLYMPICS
Let’s cut to the chase and discuss a topic quintessential to the Beep Test: Sport. And what better way to do it than the ultimate qualifier for athletes; the Olympics! With two of the strongest, fittest experts in sport! Too bad they were unavailable so, representing recreational squatting it’s Lauren Order and her teammate - the talented gymnast that quit while she was ahead - Diana Whole. These two women will be your commentators and umpires on what makes the podium and what is disqualified.
Artwork provided by Sophie Hill
Music and Theme provided by Jackson Miles
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