The Before You Do Podcast

About The Before You Do Podcast

Welcome to the Before You Do Podcast! Each week, join Verlyn Tarlton as we have real conversations about issues, we don't typically talk about that will better prepare women for the complex realities of marriage before saying "I Do". The goal is to prepare one million women to be and stay happily married. Subscribe to hear more. May you experience extraordinary love. (C) 2024 Verlyn Tarlton. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED www.verlyntarlton.com

Publisher

Verlyn Tarlton

Category

society & culture

Language

en

Explicit

No

First episode

16 Sept 2024

Latest episode

25 May 2026

Latest episodes

77 episodes in the feed.

1. 

   25 May 2026

   What's Love Got to Do with It? Season4 Episode #10

   Most marriages die not from a lack of love, but from neglecting the marathon's unspoken rules. What if the secret to lasting love isn’t just about romance, but preparation for the unexpected? Kyle Colavitti, a seasoned storyteller and speaker, reveals the essential questions every person should ask before saying "I do" — and how these choices can make or break a lifelong partnership.This episode dives deep into marriage as a marathon, not a sprint. Kyle shares candid stories — from fertility struggles to health crises — illustrating how resilience, humor, and deliberate effort are the real foundations of lasting love. You'll discover why asking the right questions early on, like “Do I want to raise children with this person?” or “Will we care for each other when sickness and aging hit?”, can save you heartbreak later. She also explores how our parenting ideals, character traits, and even physical aging influence long-term compatibility and happiness.We break down practical topics like creating shared values, the importance of communication about life’s big challenges. Host and Coach Verlyn points out that effort, effort, effort is the real currency in marriage. She states that marriage is ten percent love, thirty percent commitment, and sixty percent effort. Plus, learn how to recognize the warning signs of mismatch and build a relationship that can withstand life's unpredictable turns. Kyle emphasizes that lasting love is a continuous journey — full of repairs, honest conversations, and shared effort.Why does this matter? Because most people walk into marriage unprepared for the marathon ahead. Without the right questions and mindset, it’s easy to run out of steam when obstacles appear. But with Kyle’s insights, you'll be better equipped to choose a partner who’s in it for the long haul, and to nurture a love that evolves and endures.Perfect for couples at any stage, or singles seeking clarity — if you want a relationship built to last, this episode is your must-listen. Don't just fall into love — train for it. Your marathon partner awaits.#family (https://www.youtube.com/hashtag/family) #podcast (https://www.youtube.com/hashtag/podcast) #goals (https://www.youtube.com/hashtag/goals) #facts (https://www.youtube.com/hashtag/facts) #wisdom (https://www.youtube.com/hashtag/wisdom) #love (https://www.youtube.com/hashtag/love) #marriage (https://www.youtube.com/hashtag/marriage) #relationship (https://www.youtube.com/hashtag/relationship) #couple (https://www.youtube.com/hashtag/couple) #peace (https://www.youtube.com/hashtag/peace) Key wordsMarriage as a marathon, Lasting love, Essential questions, Lifelong partnership, Resilience and humor, Fertility struggles, Health crises, Shared values, Communication, Effort in marriage, Long-term compatibility, Relationship building, Unpredictable turns, Preparedness for marriage, Choosing the right partnerThank you for joining the conversation. Please like, hit the subscribe button, and share with a few friends. Connect with Kylehttps://www.kylecolavitti.com/ (https://www.youtube.com/redirect?event=video_description&redir_token=QUFFLUhqbVBORl92c1JXZnk0Q3dudTBUUnF1dUlqWWZvZ3xBQ3Jtc0tuejJJeU8tejV5TnhSdzUxTmFKd0l1TjJEM0FJZXZWcnl2dXNGaTBGOV81dVJBREpyU0JRRlR5T3lxNkw4MklnX3dlWHI3TzVIRV9oTU1jQV83aENJQ204Qzl3ZXN5NlgwVnBlUkQ3TzRlOWJnU0hEYw&q=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.kylecolavitti.com%2F&v=9S-6N8ExNp4)kylecolavitti@gmail.com Connect with Verlynhttps://verlyntarlton.com/ (https://www.youtube.com/redirect?event=video_description&redir_token=QUFFLUhqbThHNlFSbDJmc0NaNlc5YVdIU1hNb0kxX29oUXxBQ3Jtc0tseFFreGVlaDhJa0ExR1I5LURLSnlYckY2Qk1IdktPSW0xZ29tZ0VvUE5QZlhVazNEUGhQY2wxUUxkMHNYTXlnRGpNVGVDTlhUVUotMXV0bVh2cGFTZWhoNFhwM0M2NjB6UWtJbFhpeHJXLUcwQ1NIaw&q=https%3A%2F%2Fverlyntarlton.com%2F&v=9S-6N8ExNp4)May you experience extraordinary love.

2. 

   28 Apr 2026

   Is Marriage Dead for Us? Season 4 Episode #9

   Most women and parents overlook thesilent crisis impacting our community’s future: our marriage rates are plummeting, and it's shaping a generation that’s disconnected from the importance of family. Why are so many of our daughters influenced by a narrative that undervalues marriage — and how can we change that perspective before it’s too late? In this eye-opening episode, Verlyn Tarlton, a seasoned premarital coach and cultural observer, dives deep into the messages we send our daughters about marriage and the alarming statistics revealing the decline in Black marriage rates — from 70% among Asians to only 34% among our community. She shares powerful stories and historical insights, including her grandfather’s writings and nostalgic reflections from 1991, revealing that these attitudeshave persisted for decades. Verlyn explores how societal and familial influences shape young women’s views about independence, love, and family. You’ll discover: The cultural messages influencing girls’ perceptions of marriage and whether they favor careers over commitment. How the absence of marriage perpetuates cycles of unwed motherhood and societal instability. Practical strategies for fostering conversations about family and marriage that plant positive seeds early. Why healing from past relationship wounds is critical tobreaking generational patterns. The importance of presenting marriage as a valuable, honorable goal — not just a fairy tale, but a viable, rewardingchoice. This episode underscores why understanding and addressing these cultural narratives is vital — because the health of our families, communities, and race depend on it. If we want future generations to thrive with strong, lasting families, we must act now by shifting the conversation and leading byexample. Perfect for parents, community leaders, and women ready to reclaim their cultural legacy, this episode challenges you to rethink what’s possible for our daughters and their futures. Let’s work together to prioritize marriage, instill family values, and restore hope — because the future of ourcommunity depends on it. #family #facts #podcast #goals #love #wisdom#relationship #couple Key words Decline in Marriage Rates, Black CommunityMarriage Trends, Cultural Narratives on Marriage, Family Values and Marriage, Generational Patterns in Relationships, Premarital Coaching Insights, Societal Influences on Marriage, Marriage and Family Stability, Empowering Women in Relationships, Cultural Legacy and Marriage Thank you for joining the conversation. Make sure to like and if you have not already hit the subscribe button and share with a few friends. Connect with VerlynHome - Verlyn Tarlton (https://verlyntarlton.com/) May you experience extraordinary love.

3. 

   8 Apr 2026

   Bring Back Shame Season 4 Episode #8

   Our culture has lost sight of the power of shame — and the consequences are clear. In this provocative episode of Before You Do w/Verlyn, Coach Verlyn makes a compelling case for bringing shame back, not as guilt, but as a vital force to restore dignity, virtue, and community values. Growing up in Washington DC, Verlyn recalls a time when shame was a social glue—when adults cared about how they were viewed and took responsibility for their behavior in front of children. From men hiding liquor and cigarettes behind their backs to women dressing with class and modesty, a collective sense of shame fostered respect and self-control. Today, she argues, we've abandoned that moral backbone, leading to a culture of brazen disrespect and a lack of accountability.You'll discover:Why shame was once a key to personal and communal integrity. How modern fashion and media are eroding young girls' self-respect. Practical steps parents, grandparents, and communities can take to teach daughters true dignity. The critical role of nurturing a culture that values virtue, class, and civility. Verlyn’s powerful call to action: "Bring back shame" to elevate our daughters and preserve community values.This episode challenges you to reflect on what we're teaching the next generation—through our words and actions—and emphasizes why instilling a sense of shame can be an act of love and responsibility. It’s essential listening for anyone concerned about the moral direction of our society, especially parents and mentors who want to raise daughters with dignity and poise.Join Verlyn as she fiercely advocates for reclaiming shame as a moral compass—because without it, our culture risks losing its soul. Are you ready to make shame great again?Consequence-Driven Parenting Reinforces Values. Children’s behavior is shaped more effectively through setting clear boundaries tied to societal consequences than through abstract moral lessons. Why it matters. Actions motivated by fear of shame and community opinion create stronger internal discipline than guilt-based or permissive approaches. In practice parents should consistently connect behaviors to visible community standards, demonstrating that shame functions as a social adhesive for virtue.Cultural standards inform self-image and dress. Fashion choices for young girls should reflect societal expectations of modesty and class, rather than trends dictated solely by commercial interests. Early exposure to provocative styles signals a distorted value system, potentially shaping future behaviors and self-esteem. In practice, parents and guardians should model and enforce age-appropriate dress codes aligned with community values, emphasizing dignity over trendiness.Collective Responsibility for Cultural Transmission: Shame is a collective tool, and its erosion stems from individual choices not to uphold societal standards and to accept behavior that diminishes communal integrity. Individual complacency weakens community resilience, making social cohesion and moral standards impossible to sustain. In practice community-led initiatives, mentorship, and accountability partnerships can restore shared norms and reinforce the importance of cultural shame.Restoring Shame as a Civilizing Force: Shame functions as a vital social regulator that preserves dignity and inhibits degrading behaviors; its absence fosters reckless disregard for collective values. Rehabilitating shame helps curb lewdness, disrespect, and social divisiveness, fostering a society that values dignity and self-control. In practice. Public narratives, education, and media should emphasize shame as a sign of character and responsibility, not just an outdated concept.#shame #wisdom #saveourdaughters #family #values #virtue #podcast #love #respect Thank you for joining the conversation. Please like, subscribe, and share. Connect with VerlynHome - Verlyn Tarlton (https://verlyntarlton.com/) May you experience extraordinary love

Who has been a guest on The Before You Do Podcast

Names identified in recent episode analyses. Showing up to five guests.

• Dr Joyice Robinson Myers
• Lisa Chin
• Byron McKie
• Margaret McKie
• Amani Jackson

Reach and audience

Public platform figures. Ratings count people who left a rating, not total listeners.

YouTube views

5,682

Score snapshot 15 Sept 2025

Apple Podcasts (US)

5.0 / 5

1 ratings

Podcast Authority Score: 49 / 100

A composite of feed quality, social presence, YouTube performance and engagement. Read the methodology.

Quality

72

Social presence

0

YouTube

68

Engagement

0