#179 - Men's Panel - We've Lost The Map Of Masculinity - Soul Revolution
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We've lost the map of masculinity, and too many men are waiting for someone else to draw a new one. I sit down in front of a live audience at Soul Revolution to work out what being a good man actually asks of us.
The panel moves from the fathers and losses that shaped each man to the nice guy trap, healthy anger and the missing rites of passage between boyhood and manhood. Then the audience steps in with the harder questions: how to build this kind of community where you live, how a woman gives a man hard feedback, and how to talk about men's mental health in a family or culture that would rather hide it.
In this episode you'll learn:
How shame pushes men out of community, and why being seen in a circle brings them back
The three layers Giles sees men thrive on: energy, brotherhood and purpose
How to speak up when you see something wrong, and why healthy anger can serve justice
What sits underneath the nice guy pattern, and the question that keeps men powerless
Alex Dudgon is the founder of Soul Revolution, a meditation teacher and a father.
IG ▶ https://www.instagram.com/soul.revolution.festival/ (https://www.instagram.com/soul.revolution.festival/)
WEBSITE ▶ https://soulrevolutionfestival.com/ (https://soulrevolutionfestival.com/)
Jordan Johnson is a community builder and men's work facilitator at the heart of several of the UK's conscious community movements.
IG ▶ https://www.instagram.com/jordypjohnson/ (https://www.instagram.com/jordypjohnson/)
Giles Denning built the UK's biggest physical fitness show and is now taking men's mental fitness mainstream.
IG ▶ https://www.instagram.com/giles_denning/ (https://www.instagram.com/giles_denning/)
David Chambers is a dating, relationship and intimacy coach who has been coaching men for over a decade.
IG ▶ https://www.instagram.com/theauthenticman_/ (https://www.instagram.com/theauthenticman_/)
====== CHRIS ======
IG ▶ https://www.instagram.com/the.chris.geisler/ (https://www.instagram.com/the.chris.geisler/)
WORK WITH ME ▶ https://www.menofearth.co.uk/start-here (https://www.menofearth.co.uk/start-here)
====== SUPPORT ======
Support The Podcast ▶ https://www.patreon.com/thechrisgeisler (https://www.patreon.com/thechrisgeisler)
Telegram Community ▶ https://t.me/thechrisgeislerpodcast (https://t.me/thechrisgeislerpodcast)
Whatsapp Community ▶ https://chat.whatsapp.com/EChENkePiUy1Sa1kqbKarP (https://chat.whatsapp.com/EChENkePiUy1Sa1kqbKarP)
21 Oct 2026
#178 - “I Was the F*ck Boy Before I Was Spiritual” - Steve Shiva
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https://www.menofearth.co.uk/books
This conversation is about what that mistrust costs us, and what it takes to become a man other people can feel safe around.
Steve shares his path from a numb, drug and alcohol fuelled life selling real estate in Mexico to shadow work at the Osho resort in Pune, and why the men he now leads start every retreat by naming their judgments out loud. We go into humour as armour, the nice guy versus the dark masculine, what women's work actually asks of women, and what tantra really is beyond sex.
In this episode you'll learn:
- Why naming your judgment of another man disarms it, and how to do it
- How sarcasm and jokes contract a room, and how to repair it even a year later
- Why the core masculine wound is "I'm not good enough" and how separating behaviour from identity loosens it
- Why pushing sexuality down makes it come out sideways
Steve Shiva is a Masculine Embodiment and Truth Based Relating coach and holistic counsellor with a BSc in Psychology. He has walked the path of tantra since 2008, founded Notorious Hearts and Rites of Passage for Men, and is a cofounder of Temple Village in Ubud, Bali.
Watch the full conversation on YouTube:
https://www.youtube.com/@thechrisgeislerpodcast?sub_confirmation=1
STEVE
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/steve.shiva.official
Temple Village: https://www.templevillage.com
Notorious Hearts: https://www.notorioushearts.com
CHRIS
Work with me: https://www.menofearth.co.uk/start-here
Men's work: https://www.menofearth.co.uk
SUPPORT
Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/thechrisgeisler
Telegram community: https://t.me/thechrisgeislerpodcast
WhatsApp community: https://chat.whatsapp.com/EChENkePiUy1Sa1kqbKarP
CHAPTERS
00:00 Why Steve reversed his vasectomy
05:51 Chris names his judgments of Steve
08:36 Cult leaders and men's sexual integrity
12:32 Telling a man you're judging him
15:39 Mexico, numbness and shadowy sexuality
17:37 Breaking open at the Osho resort
22:28 Why this work has to happen in community
25:17 Ask five people what you can't see
27:12 Thirty people, one after another
30:49 Humour that closes people down
33:49 The core wound: I'm not good enough
36:25 Rewards, punishment and separating behaviour from person
40:26 Who actually walks into men's work
42:40 Why you can't send your partner to men's work
45:51 Anger, alcohol and old patterns
46:59 Men's longing for physical warmth
50:49 Nice guys, pleasers and the dark masculine
55:18 Me Too and sexuality coming out sideways
57:34 The darkness we're all capable of
59:50 What women's work really asks
1:06:17 Independence and devotion to something bigger
1:07:28 Building Temple Village in Bali
1:10:58 What tantra actually is
30 Sept 2026
#177 - Psychosis or Spiritual Awakening? - Connor Oakaiah
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https://us06web.zoom.us/meeting/register/nUnbPWtrSz6z0_s5JjWpmA (https://us06web.zoom.us/meeting/register/nUnbPWtrSz6z0_s5JjWpmA)
Download My Top 20 Books Every Man Needs To Read:
https://chris-geisler.mykajabi.com/books (https://chris-geisler.mykajabi.com/books)
Join Chris’s Online Mens Community:
www.menofearth.co.uk/innercircle (http://www.menofearth.co.uk/innercircle)
4 days without sleep in Cambodia. A hospital bed, a diagnosis, and nine months of depression. Connor calls it the best thing that ever happened to him, and he's never told the full story until now.
Recorded at Wasing Estate post Medicine Festival, Connor shares what happened when heartbreak cracked his reality open, why the hardest part wasn't the episode but having his experience denied, and what it cost him in friendships. We then follow the thread to where it led: meeting his partner, the birth of his son Nalu, and his work now supporting men through the journey to fatherhood.
In this episode you'll learn:
Why Connor still uses the word psychosis, and what shifted when he saw it through a different lens
What it feels like when the people closest to you deny your experience, and how he came to own the harm it caused them
Why freedom isn't the absence of responsibility but the choice of it
====== CONNOR OAKAIAH =====
IG ▶ https://www.instagram.com/connoroakaiah/ (https://www.instagram.com/connoroakaiah/)
WEBSITE ▶ https://www.journeytofatherhood.org/ (https://www.journeytofatherhood.org/)
====== CHRIS GEISLER ======
WORK WITH ME ▶ https://chris-geisler.mykajabi.com/start-here (https://chris-geisler.mykajabi.com/start-here)
====== SUPPORT ======
Support The Podcast ▶ www.patreon.com/thechrisgeisler (http://www.patreon.com/thechrisgeisler)
Podcast Whatsapp Community ▶ https://t.me/thechrisgeislerpodcast (https://t.me/thechrisgeislerpodcast)
Who has been a guest on The Chris Geisler Podcast
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George Thompson
Bear Intentions
Chay Godfree
The Great Kasrani
Pierre-Etienne Vannier
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YouTube views
102,924
Score snapshot 15 Sept 2025
Apple Podcasts (US)
5.0 / 5
3 ratings
Spotify
4.9 / 5
54 ratings
Podcast Authority Score: 71 / 100
A composite of feed quality, social presence, YouTube performance and engagement. Read the methodology.
Quality
74
Social presence
0
YouTube
86
Engagement
85
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