Two Cowards is a podcast dedicated to reviewing the musical works of one of the internet's biggest celebrities, Viper. Join Will and Garrett as they delve into the several thousand albums long discography and slowly descend into madness.
Got a good ol' double episode coming your way today. Could've been a two parter but that would've been marginally more work, and if there's one thing we should be known for, it's doing the bare minimum. Guest star Ben (aka Atticus Lane) discusses Viper's Acapellas, What the F$Ck is a Recession, and his own upcoming album Sasha Winters. There is nothing more satisfying in this world than forcing another human being besides us to listen to Viper against their will. Especially Acapellas.
13 May 2021
14. And What's A Trip Is...
Yeah its late but this time it ISN'T my fault. It got put in the Google Drive late. Viper has a stroke and forgets how to speak in this episode, so that's interesting. Cobra is back as well, unfortunately. We also get a bit into Viper's politics and Garrett wears his heart on his sleeve, maybe a little too much.
5 May 2021
13. Strong Wizard Rap Magic
Well, this episode might not have any good Viper on it, but it does have a 10 minute digression into our favorite video games and more Jack Black lore than you probably ever needed. Big apologies to our Albanian listeners, sorry you had to hear Will's tirade against your proud and mighty people. Anyways, I thought today was Thursday and freaked out cause I thought I forgot to upload but then I realized it was Wednesday and a big part of me wanted to delay the upload anyways to keep tradition. This is the smallest hill I'm willing to die on, don't @ me.
29 Apr 2021
12. We Hit the Big Time
Guess we explain last week's thumbnail, so that's a good reason to listen. Also Real Evil Alphabet Lunch. No, that isn't your sleeper agent code. In fact, we explain precisely what is. Big shouts out to our Albanian fandom, you guys are the realest. You're up to 2% of our listeners now, so it clearly isn't a fluke.
Sorry for the late upload again. Time is an illusion.
22 Apr 2021
11. Viper Doesn't Know His Own Songs (And Also is a Dog)
Woof woof. RIP DMX but hail Viper, the new top dawg. That pained me to even type out facetiously. Well anyways, join Garrett and Will this week on the adventure of a lifetime as we go through a bit more new music from our old pal Viper, something we haven't gotten as much of recently. Don't worry about this week's cover art. I'll explain it when you're older. Will continues his record of being way better at editing than Garrett, but I still can't manage to get these things uploaded on any meaningful sort of schedule. "Wednesday" is such a vague term.
15 Apr 2021
10. Masters in Dope Administration
Hard to believe we've already hit double digits. Feels like just yesterday we were talking about Hustlin' Thick for the first time and Garrett was doing waaaaay more prep per episode than he is now. Anyways we're onboarding a new editor this week (it's just Will actually) so bear with us for a week or two until we get things sorted out.
9 Apr 2021
9. Look at These Idiots!
Another week, another off-schedule release. Sorry guys. I was traveling again and this episode was a mess to edit. Also I don't care about schedules. Sue me.
This week Will and Garrett discuss a couple albums, if you can call them that, do a little more trivia and a lot of bitching about baseball. Fun for the whole family!
We don't have an email for fan mail yet, but that should be coming soon. For now, just hit us up on Twitter, @CowardsTwo.
1 Apr 2021
8. O Golpe Venenoso da Víbora
Sorry for the delay everyone, I was out of town for work last week and didn't have time to upload an ep. Better late than never though! Hope you all enjoy one of our best episodes yet, our discussion of the best/worst Viper album of all time, anti-Viper, Daft Punk and the beautiful land of Brazil.
17 Mar 2021
7. Garrett Asked and He Shall Receive
Lots of things to discuss today. Sorry for some audio issues, I'm honestly not sure what's going on there. Anyways if you wanna be a part of Viper stan Twitter hit us up.
11 Mar 2021
6. Two Paper Men, One New Song & A Whole Lotta Pain
Join Will and Garrett this week for an expenses paid trip to "IDon'tGiveAFuck"land. Also I totally forgot what our upload schedule is. Sorry about that. Putting this out now I guess.
4 Mar 2021
5. The Thug Trilogy
Garrett made an uh-oh whoopsie on the recording, so Will sounds a bit robotic on this episode. Sorry about that folks. Everything will be back to normal next week, but for now, enjoy the worst Viper has had to offer so far!
24 Feb 2021
4. War Reparations & Min-Maxing Cobra
Join Garrett and Will this week in a heated discussion of the Cobra Special, four consecutive albums involving Viper's son/vocoder, Cobra. These boys just can't find peace of mind.
17 Feb 2021
3. Diemondback, Cobra and Viper's Waifu
This week on Two Cowards, Will and Garrett take a deep dive into Viper's multiple personalities/dissociative identity disorder. Included are discussions of Paper Man, Hiram Clarke Hustler, Snake in the Grass, and Movin' Rocks, Bolders and Bricks. Kill us now!
10 Feb 2021
2. You'll Cowards Special
In this special episode of Two Cowards, Will and Garrett tackle one of the most (in)famous of all Viper albums, 2008's You'll Cowards Who Don't Even Smoke Crack. This album made Viper in the man and meme he is today, and causes our boys to fall deeper into despair.
3 Feb 2021
1. The Early Years
This week, Will and Garrett discuss Viper's first four albums, Hustlin' Thick, Ready and... Willing, Heartless Hoodlum and Southwest Hooligan. Come for the music commentary, stay for the Alaskan politics trivia.
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