Uninhibited

About Uninhibited

Welcome to Uninhibited, a podcast with the mission to discuss taboo, multicultural, multi-generational, and multi-layered topics that matter to women. Our host, Dr. Makunda Abdul Mbacke, is an Ivy-League trained OBGYN, practicing medicine in rural America. She is a mother, career professional, part of Generation X, and so much more. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy (https://acast.com/privacy) for more information.

Publisher

Makunda Mbacke

Category

education · society & culture

Language

en

Explicit

No

First episode

13 Jul 2019

Latest episode

23 Jun 2020

Latest episodes

19 episodes in the feed.

1. 

   23 Jun 2020

   Episode 19: Healing from trauma

   Welcome to Uninhibited, a podcast with the mission to discuss taboo, multicultural, multi-generational, and multi-layered topics that matter to women. Our host, Dr. Makunda Abdul Mbacke, is an Ivy-League trained OBGYN, practicing medicine in rural America. She is a mother, career professional, part of Generation X, and so much more. --- 0:45 -Dr. Makunda welcomes listeners with an introduction to today’s guest, Dr. Elizabeth “Liz” Stanley, author of Widen the Window: Training Your Brain and Body to Thrive During Stress and Recover from Trauma, and a longtime friend of Dr. Makunda. 2:15 - Liz shares about her background, starting with her being the ninth generation of her family to serve in the military. She went to Yale on an ROTC scholarship and went on two deployments and finally had to confront many years of trauma in graduate school. Her book is a navigation of her own recovery, the science of trauma and recovery, and how this all came together in the creation of Liz’s resilience training for others. 6:10 - Dr, Makunda asks what Liz experienced when it all became too much, and the process of realizing her physical and emotional traumas. The physical manifestations of stress and trauma can be astounding, which emphasizes the importance of mental health and wellness. It took Liz and her doctors years to figure out all the contributing factors that affected her health. 9:00 - “It’s a strong metaphor - I didn’t want to see what was in my life.” Liz comments on how her physical conditions, like temporarily losing her eyesight, were indicative of larger issues in her life. 10:30 - Liz explains the experience of not being believed by medical professionals when she went to them for help. It was devastating and traumatic not to be believed, but also led Liz to a path of owning her decisions and her body, trying non-traditional techniques and approaches to healing herself. However, she doesn’t fault the doctors at all - they were working with the tools and knowledge they had at the time. 15:00 - Dr. Makunda asks Liz to explain the thinking brain vs. the survival brain, a concept that she dives into in her book. The thinking brain controls reasoning, planning, willpower, and explicit decision-making - it’s the narrator of our daily lives. The survival brain is the evolutionary older parts of the brain that controls emotions and reactions, our unconscious and automatic thought and reaction. Our thinking brain can go offline in trauma and stress, while the survival brain is always on, always learning, always remembering, so our brains operate very differently when we are experiencing a stress event. 20:00 - Liz details the condition of survival brain hijacking, where the thinking brain is overridden by the survival brain and self-medicating and self-harming behavior can become more prevalent, but true mental and physical healing is not being achieved. 21:05 - Dr. Makunda asks Liz about the Mindfulness Based Mind Fitness Training (MMFT) that she developed and why it was necessary. There was a need for people who had experienced mental and physical trauma to navigate meditation and mindfulness differently, and address the survival brain’s responses. The most important aspect is for people to continually practice the exercises, to help the brain retrain itself. 26:50 - “Mindfulness really does need to be taught in a trauma-sensitive or trauma-informed manner, and there’s starting to be some movement towards that direction, because that’s not the way that the mass media often portrays it.” - Liz’s statement that meditation and mindfulness practice is really not as easy as the media can make it seem. 28:45 - Dr Makunda and Liz discuss how meditation and mindfulness practice can help with younger and teenage populations, especially as there is more attention on childhood stress and trauma, and a wider acceptance that early childhood experiences can plant the seeds of behavioral issues and emotional resiliency later in life. 33:27 - Dr. Makunda asks if adversity can create grit and determination in people and actually contribute to success, as both Makunda and Liz have both experienced in their lives. Without adversity, can we develop resiliency and push for greater achievements, more success? Liz offers her perspective on this challenging question. There are so many layers to how an individual may experience adversity, stress, trauma, and how that person may get through and internalize the situation. 41:07 - Dr. Makunda asks Liz how we can practice healthy behaviors in the current climate of living under stay-at-home orders because of COVID-19. Financial uncertainty, losing jobs, disrupted routines, limited movement can be very disrupting and distressing. However, Liz emphasizes that this is a “new beginnings” time, a structural time where we can work on new habits and make choices to build resilience while we are navigating uncertainty. 43:50 - Liz shares some mental and physical wellbeing tips for listeners to reinforce their survival brains while in COVID-19 lockdown. She recommends getting enough sleep, disengaging from the crisis media, finding a way to exercise or move your body every day, to focus on diet and balanced eating, making time to connect virtually with others to socialize, but also making space for alone time as well. 49:10 - Liz leaves listeners with this - you always have a choice about where you are directing your attention. We can learn to train our attention to que the body and survival brain to feel space. Download Liz’s 5-minute guided exercise from her website to get started on your mindfulness practice. Check out Liz’s website - https://elizabeth-stanley.com/ (https://elizabeth-stanley.com/) Get her book - Widen the Window: Training Your Brain and Body to Thrive During Stress and Recover from Trauma (https://www.amazon.com/Widen-Window-Training-Thrive-Recover/dp/0735216592). Gain access to the MMFT® Contact Points Exercise - https://elizabeth-stanley.com/resources/ (https://elizabeth-stanley.com/resources/) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy (https://acast.com/privacy) for more information.

2. 

   16 Jun 2020

   Episode 18: PRIDE

   Welcome to Uninhibited, a podcast with the mission to discuss taboo, multicultural, multi-generational, and multi-layered topics that matter to women. Our host, Dr. Makunda Abdul Mbacke, is an Ivy-League trained OBGYN, practicing medicine in rural America. She is a mother, career professional, part of Generation X, and so much more. --- 00:48 - Welcome to another episode of Uninhibited! Today we’re joined by guest Sharon Monsanto Carter, and she kicks off the discussion by sharing some about her personal background. 2:03 - Dr. Makunda explains that she invited Sharon to speak as she is the mother of a gay child, and because Sharon acts as an advocate for both of her daughters. 3:30 - Sharon shares about navigating the differences in her daughters as they grew up, and how she supported her daughter, Taylor, as she discovered her identity as a lesbian. They had a household of honesty and support, which allowed her daughter to feel comfortable being her true self and not being afraid to come out. 8:00 - Dr. Makunda asks Sharon about how Taylor’s coming out was received by her father and her sister. Her father was most concerned about how the world would perceive her and the challenges she would face, and Taylor’s sister also struggled with how to properly support her sister’s identity. But their family was able to rally around Taylor and love her for who she is. 11:50 - Dr. Makunda inquires about how faith played into their views and if there was a conflict there. Sharon explains that God and faith is based in love, so her faith was not altered but neither was the love she has for her child. 14:10 - Sharon explains how her extended family accepted and supported Taylor, and how she as a mother didn’t feel like she needed to be over protective. Sharon tells the story about how Taylor felt confident going to prom wearing a tuxedo because nobody would want to deal with the repercussions of upsetting Sharon! 16:51 - Dr. Makunda asks about the difficulties that Taylor faced growing up and being her true self. Sharon explains that other kids would talk about her, that they accused her of choosing to be gay and different, that she felt disrespected as a person. 19:22 - Sharon talks more about why the family chose to leave their home Pentacostal church for a different type of church. While there were many reasons, the heart of it lay in the church being able to accept Taylor. Now, their current church and their pastor love and welcome Taylor for who she is, and Taylor was able to find a renewed identity in her faith. 21:50 - Dr. Makunda asks what advice Sharon would give to a parent who is struggling with accepting their child who has come out to them. Sharon explains that it’s not about your image, it’s about your child and loving them. There are so many people in the world who will judge them that they need the love, support, and safety from their family. 24:05 - Sharon shares about how Taylor has changed and learned so much since going to college, especially as she’s been exposed to so many people’s experiences and stories. She appreciates how her family supports and accepts her because there are so many people who do not have that. Sharon goes back to what is most important - not image, not what other people think, but the deep love between a parent and child. 30:05 - Dr. Makunda asks what Sharon tells Taylor in terms of protecting herself and treating others in relationships, especially as there is more information about rates of violence in LGBTQ relationships. Sharon speaks to the open communication that she and Taylor have, the emphasis that violence is never the answer to a problem, and being transparent with a partner when a relationship begins so each person understands where the other is coming from. 35:13 - Dr. Makunda asks what advice Sharon would end with. Sharon emphasizes pouring love into your children, however they identify, if they got in trouble, if they are doing well in life. Support them in all that they do because they need you as a parent to love them and be there for them. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy (https://acast.com/privacy) for more information.

3. 

   9 Jun 2020

   Episode 17: COVID 19 in the African-American community

   Welcome to Uninhibited, a podcast with the mission to discuss taboo, multicultural, multi-generational, and multi-layered topics that matter to women. Our host, Dr. Makunda Abdul Mbacke, is an Ivy-League trained OBGYN, practicing medicine in rural America. She is a mother, career professional, part of Generation X, and so much more. --- 00:48 - Dr. Makunda opens the episode by introducing her two guests and the topic for today, the impact of COVID-19 in underserved communities. Shani Gaylord works for the Virginia Department of Health, Youth Health Equity Institute, and is a passionate community member that cares for public health and sharing reliable knowledge. Sable K. Nelson Dyer is the Acting Director of the Office of Health Equity at the VA Department of Health, and currently serves as the chair of the Health Equity Working Group that is responding to the Virginia COVID-19 crisis. 3:45 - Dr. Makunda brings up how the news brought attention to the higher death rates in black and brown communities, and asks Shani and Sable to weigh in on why COVID-19 is ravaging these populations at a higher rate. Shani speaks to the socio-economic patterns in America’s history that place minorities at higher risk, such as working in essential roles and living in more multi-generational situations. Sable agrees that COVID-19 has only emphasized health, social, and resource inequities that existed before the virus. 10:46 - Shani shares something good to come from all this, which is that healthcare has expanded to cover more people who are without insurance and access. COVID-19 testing and paid sick time during this time is a critical way to include vulnerable and underserved populations who are affected by the pandemic. The group discusses the concept of “weathering” in black communities, and the heightened levels of stress and health issues that black people have to face that makes them more susceptible to illness. 15:05 - Dr. Makunda asks her guests to speak on institutional racism and its effects on black communities. Shani shares background and definition of the concept, while Sable and Dr. Makunda share examples of institutional racism in action. 25:57 - Dr. Makunda talks about the conspiracy theories and misinformation around COVID-19, like the early statements that African Americans couldn’t get the disease. This put many people in vulnerable populations at risk, especially because access to higher quality resources is more limited within minority communities. Shani brings up that this negatively affects data collection and can reinforce misconceptions about how the disease is impacting the population. 31:45 - Shani speaks to her knowledge on unequal data collection on the demographics of COVID-19 infection and death across healthcare providers. There is discussion around how and why this is occurring and how it is impacting health and public policy. 37:55 - Dr. Makunda poses another controversial question: Just because the government says we can reopen, does that mean it’s safe to go out. Shani and Sable chime in on their impressions on if safe reopening can occur from a governmental and individual viewpoint. 44:10 - Sable brings up the misconception that younger people have that COVID-19 cannot sicken them badly. There are COVID-19 cases that are showing up in children, and there are deaths and long-term post-infection impacts in younger people. There is also a huge risk that people in younger age groups can be carriers and spread the virus even more. 47:31 - Sable also discusses confusion around what kind of masks to wear, the importance of wearing a mask, and if it even makes a difference. Dr. Makunda lends her professional knowledge to explain how critical masks are in minimizing the spread of the virus. 49:15 - Dr. Makunda asks if Shani and Sable think there is enough testing occurring and what they’ve seen in their communities. Shani says there isn’t enough testing and has personal experiences that people are being dissuaded from getting tested. Sable agrees that in order to get a test in the Virginia area, you need to have a prescription and be exhibiting visible COVID-19 symptoms. This does not appropriately protect underserved communities from becoming hotspots of infection. 57:15 - Dr. Makunda talks about the states that are starting to reopen, asking what their community should do as they prepare to phase back into reopening. Shani emphasizes getting tested and sticking to healthy practices, like good hand washing and social distancing. 58:25 - The group discusses special considerations and potential concerns when a vaccine is developed. Shani thinks there will be skepticism and mistrust around a vaccine, as they often take years to develop. Sable agrees and encourages following the data and cautiously proceeding in taking advantage of a vaccine once one has been developed. 1:04:15 - Dr. Makunda asks “Where do we go now?”, inquiring how we can change the systems in place and create positive change moving forward. Sable thinks that COVID-19 has highlighted a lot of potential for change for marginalized communities to receive funding and resources to support those who need it. Shani agrees, seeing that relationships with political and community organizations have strengthened, and the virtual reach we now have can extend to more people. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy (https://acast.com/privacy) for more information.

4. 

   2 Jun 2020

   Episode 16: What's done in the dark

   Welcome to Uninhibited, a podcast with the mission to discuss taboo, multicultural, multi-generational, and multi-layered topics that matter to women. Our host, Dr. Makunda Abdul Mbacke, is an Ivy-League trained OBGYN, practicing medicine in rural America. She is a mother, career professional, part of Generation X, and so much more. --- 00:48 Dr. Makunda welcomes today’s guest, Anita Kopacz, a mother, writer, speaker, and a survivor of sexual molestation as a young child who is willing to share her story and journey. Anita starts the episode by sharing more about herself, her background, and her work. 3:05 - Dr. Makunda asks Anita about how she developed the awareness of the abuse that she went through as a child, and how that realization affected her as an adult. Anita expressed that it took a long time and having her own children to fully realize the trauma of what she went through, and experienced a lot of guilt and shame from that experience. 5:25 - Anita expresses that she needed to heal herself from her trauma because it was not only negatively effecting her children, but she was also not enjoying sex, having flashbacks from her molestation, and had other negative experiences around sex. 7:11 - Dr. Makunda asks Anita who the first person was that she shared her molestation with. While in college, Anita shared her experience for the first time with her two older sisters. However, she recalls a memory of watching Oprah at a young age and fully took on the ownership and shame of her experience because of the confusing feelings that her molestation caused. 9:26 - Anita explains that she began to share her experience more with other people as she grew up. She told her mother in her late twenties, and had to navigate talking through the experience with her father when he found out through her social media. 14:12 - Dr. Makunda inquires how the interactions began and if Anita noticed any grooming habits during the time her molestation took place. Anita explains that her abuser is in her family so there were perhaps grooming habits that she didn’t notice. While she was in training, Ainta addressed her abuser and they had a direct conversation about the experience, where he apologized to her and shared the experience of his own molestation. 19:20 - Anita and Dr. Makunda discuss how to positively influence, help, and protect their children, especially with the growing movement of allowing children to be autonomous and decide if they do or don’t want to hug or kiss family members. If a child doesn’t want to physically interact with someone, then don’t force it. 23:43 - Anita talks about her relationship with her partner and how he was included in her healing process, especially because intimacy is a critical part of how he feels love, but sex was difficult for her for a long time. They had to work through it together. 26:20 - Dr. Makunda asks Anita to share about her pathway to healing, acknowledging that healing is not linear or necessarily an easy path. Anita felt that her healing was not just for her - it was for her children and her partner too, and she felt drawn to document her journey in order to help others. She also incorporated artistic elements and body-focused trauma therapy as tools to help with her healing. 30:50 - Dr. Makunda asks Anita about the sessions that she had with Christopher, the body trauma therapist, and Anita elaborates on how her therapy progressed. They discuss how much of healing is based in trust and addressing the physical trauma within her body slowly. 35:33 - Ainta explains how her healing progressed from therapy to the experience of having her body painted, which was intensely emotional but an important step in her healing and her process to becoming a sexual and trauma coach. 39:30 - Dr. Makunda asks how someone with less resources than Anita be able to take on their sexual trauma in a similar way. Are there programs available to these populations? Anita speaks about the Center for Safety and Change in New City, NY are able to provide call-in services and support for anyone who needs it. The Center also has a safehouse that is available for individuals located outside of New York to seek refuge at. However, in most major cities, there are local resources that are available to people suffering from trauma. 42:18 - Dr. Makunda asks Ainta what she thinks is the most important aspect about breaking the cycle of abuse in society. Ainta credits speaking up about abuse and giving it a voice helps to call attention to the issue and stop the action. We also need to be ready to do the work of healing and working through those experiences, and people need to believe each other when we talk about this type of pain! 47:20 - To wrap up, Anita shares about the Zero F’s Given campaign that she created to bring awareness to those who have experienced sexual violence. Zero F’s day is set for June 7th where people will be brought together for performances, speakers, healing yoga, and togetherness. 80% of the proceeds from Zero F’s merch sales go towards supporting the Center for Safety and Change! ----- Check out the Center for Safety and Change (https://www.centerforsafetyandchange.org/). You can call their 24 hour hotline for help - 845-634-3344. Find out more about the Zero F’s campaign and buy your Zero F’s Given Merch (https://www.bonfire.com/zero-fs-given/)! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy (https://acast.com/privacy) for more information.

5. 

   26 May 2020

   Episode 15: COVID19 and the Church

   Welcome to Uninhibited, a podcast with the mission to discuss taboo, multicultural, multi-generational, and multi-layered topics that matter to women. Our host, Dr. Makunda Abdul-Mbacke, is an Ivy-League trained OBGYN, practicing medicine in rural America. She is a mother, career professional, part of Generation X, and so much more. --- *This podcast episode is a recording of a Facebook Live event. 00:50 - Our episode opens with Reverend Keishawn R. Niblett, who is hosting the episode and interviewing Dr. Mbacke about the COVID-19 response in their local and faith communities, and what responsibilities we as individuals have to minimize the impact of the virus. 2:15 - Dr. Mbacke starts with an introduction of herself, her professional background, and explains how COVID-19 in particular is catching her attention because of its negative effects on the black community. 5:27 - Reverend Keishawn asks if and how the local, rural healthcare system will be able to cope with a COVID-19 spike if it were to happen in their community. Dr. Mbacke explains that confirmed cases are just confirmations that the virus is already there, and there are probably many more people that are experiencing mild symptoms or are asymptomatic carriers. She explains that flattening the curve is to help the healthcare system, but there is still a shortage of PPE, ventilators, and hospital beds, especially in their smaller community. 12:14 - Reverend Keishawn references a question posed in the chat about the availability of COVID-19 testing in the area. Dr. Mbacke says there are a few tests available at local doctor’s offices, as well as a testing clinic set up by the Department of Health at the Martinsville Speedway. Patients are also being screened for the virus before any surgical procedures. 16:35 - The Reverend speaks about the Governor’s stay-at-home order and what limitations are now carefully being lifted. There are requirements that businesses and churches have to have in place in order to operate, and he asks Dr. Mbacke about how this may affect how people worship. She explains that life will definitely be different for a while, at least before a vaccine is developed, and the guidelines of the 50% occupancy are not the only rules to follow. Social distancing and staying with your home-unit is still critical in those types of gatherings. 26:22 - Reverend Keishawn asks what resources to point people to for accurate information about COVID-19? Dr. Mbacke recommends referencing the Virginia Department of Health and the CDC website for accurate and up-to-date information about the virus, the spread, and what scientists are working on. They discuss the importance of understanding this information and following the Governor’s orders to ensure that everyone does their part to keep the community safe. 28:16 - A listener chimes in with a statement for discussion about the safety of returning to church and how to care for each other by worshipping differently. He questions why there is pressure to reopen the state when there are still people getting sick. Dr. Mbacke agrees with the speaker’s point that the pressure to reopen is driven more by economics rather than science, and discusses how the response to reopening across the nation has been mixed. 35:15 - Reverend Keishawn reads a chat question asking if there is a cost for COVID-19 testing and if insurance will cover it. Dr. Mbacke explains that the President has promised everyone who needs a test can get tested and insurance should cover these tests. However, there are not yet enough tests for anyone to get tested; usually, you have to exhibit symptoms or have close contact with an infected person to qualify for testing. 36:42 - Another question concerns how long someone may be an asymptomatic carrier, not showing symptoms but still spreading the virus. Dr. Mbacke says there is definitely proof of asymptomatic transmission, but the window of how long someone may be contagious is still unknown. 39:27 - Someone asks a question about healthy people wearing masks and potential cross contamination that can occur with wearing gloves in public. With exception of the N95 masks reserved for healthcare workers, Dr. Mbacke encourages the general public to wear cloth masks that cover the mouth and nose, even if you feel healthy. Wearing a mask protects your health and also the health of the people around you. As for gloves, you are easily exposed to cross contamination if you are not changing your gloves regularly, but these are critical supplies that first responders need first and foremost. 46:55 - Another question regards food safety and what to be aware of. Dr. Mbacke cautions against eating food that is exposed to respiratory droplets that can be expelled simply by talking. For example, it is best to avoid birthday party food and buffet style dinners that traditionally bring together lots of people. With grocery store food, there may be germs or virus cells living on the food packaging, but contamination on actual, cooked food is low. 50:25 - Dr. Mbacke asks the Reverend about his concerns about tithe in church and cautions around collecting cash. He explains that there is some movement towards digital giving, but also that church members are working to ensure that any cash donations are properly handled and sanitized. He emphasizes safety over everything and foresees online giving becoming the new way forward. 52:30 - Reverend Keishawn thanks Dr. Mbacke for her time and her professional guidance on how to safely move forward in this situation. Dr. Mbacke ends with a reminder to us all that we must support each other during this time to prevent the spread of sickness, and that there is hope and a cure being worked on. 1:00:27 - One final question asks if you can be reinfected once you have had COVID-19. Dr. Mbacke explains that it is still too early to know this for certain, but other countries like South Korea are looking into this as their country reopens and infections are spiking again. There is the potential that the virus can lay dormant for a while before resurfacing, but there are too many unknowns with COVID at this time. --- For guidance on COVID-19 requirements and limitations, please reference the Virginia Department of Health (https://www.vdh.virginia.gov/) and the CDC Website (https://www.cdc.gov/). Find Uninhibited at: Facebook Instagram @uninhibited.podcast (https://www.instagram.com/uninhibited.podcast/) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy (https://acast.com/privacy) for more information.

6. 

   22 Oct 2019

   Episode 14: Annie Part 2

   Welcome to Uninhibited, a podcast with the mission to discuss taboo, multicultural, multi-generational, and multi-layered topics that matter to women. Our host, Dr. Makunda Abdul Mbacke, is an Ivy-League trained OBGYN, practicing medicine in rural America. She is a mother, career professional, part of Generation X, and so much more. --- 00:50 - Welcome to another episode of Uninhibited. We’re joined by Annie for part two of her interview, to discuss her background and influences that led to situations of interpersonal and relationship violence. Annie talks about her growth and survival through these deeply personal and painful challenges, as well as her future. 2:10 - Annie discusses the development of her second serious relationship, as the friendship and safety that her second partner offered was a stark difference from her first boyfriend. However, there were still some behavioral red flags in her second partner that Annie wasn’t able to see at first. 4:03 - During that time, Annie started at Yale’s Masters of Public Health program and got pregnant with their first child; her daughter was born during the first year of Annie’s Masters program.There were many other distractions and responsibilities that took up Annie’s focus, so she wasn’t able to clearly see the abusive patterns in her partner. 5:10 - Dr. Makunda asks what contributed to the abuse, and what kinds of abuse Annie’s partner subjected her to. Her partner actually suffered physical abuse from his own father and it was his goal never to emulate that behavior. Annie didn’t experience the same types of abuse that she did in her first relationship. She was able to have friends and a social life, she went to school and had jobs, he didn’t insult her - the manipulation came in the form of controlling money and working for his own self interest, at the cost of his family’s future. 8:23 - Annie explains how she was very much in the dark about their financial situation and that her partner convinced her that he always knew best. But, this was normal for Annie, as she had grown up in a household that did not speak about money or financial survival and felt she had no concept of income or money management. 13:30 - Dr. Makunda asks if Annie continued to work throughout her second relationship. Annie explains that after her daughter, their four other children quickly followed, and her focus was on being a good mother and supportive partner, despite her partner’s lies and deceit about their finances. 16:50 - Annie began to stand up for herself and her family and followed her intuition; she pushed back against her partner’s bad business deals and ideas for fear of risking her family’s security. Her partner had been sued a few times in the past, although there was nothing to be won from them because they had no money. 19:48 - Her partner would continue to lie to her face, saying that he was listening to her but continuing to push his bad business through, which eventually landed them in bankruptcy court. Annie describes wanting to believe that their relationship was still good, even though it was clear to her that it wasn’t. 22:12 - Annie’s aha moment when she realized she had to leave her partner was signified by two events. First was when her two oldest children saw the dysfunction in the home for themselves and made the decision to leave. Second, a woman very who Annie holds very close in her heart, taught Annie about poverty, finances, and how women can be the money savers in the family, that women are generally more financially-savvy than men. This woman empowered Annie to start taking control. 24:30 - After recognizing the financial dysfunction in her partner, Annie demanded a separate bank account, prevented irresponsible spending on big-ticket items, and accurate accounting of their finances. Her partner then pursued disability and social security payments to fund his life, and Annie started to regain control and fix their financial situation. 30:20 - Annie discusses her realization of the risks her partner put her in, if he were to leave with all of their money. However, she educated herself about all the available options for money management and how to care for her finances, and empowered herself to take control. Dr. Makunda acknowledges that this is still something that we don’t promote in women, despite our good education and hard work ethic - but this is starting to change with our younger generation. 35:43 - Annie describes climbing out of their financial hole and how she transformed her life. She managed to move herself and her two youngest children to a new apartment and told her partner that he needed to find his own, separate living situation. Annie is finally finding stability for herself; she is saving herself and transforming her life. 39:45 - “I have to tell you, being your own rescuer is the best rescue of all.” - Annie leaves listeners with an inspiring message of hope, survival, and self-empowerment. 42:35 - Annie shares a quote that really captures what her journey - and this podcast - is about: “Don’t be afraid to share your story. It could be the key that unlocks someone else’s prison.” Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy (https://acast.com/privacy) for more information.

7. 

   8 Oct 2019

   Episode 13: From Victim to Survivor

   Uninhibited Podcast Shownotes Season 2, Episode 3: Annie Part 1 Welcome to Uninhibited, a podcast with the mission to discuss taboo, multicultural, multi-generational, and multi-layered topics that matter to women. Our host, Dr. Makunda Abdul Mbacke, is an Ivy-League trained OBGYN, practicing medicine in rural America. She is a mother, career professional, part of Generation X, and so much more. --- 1:00 - Today, we are joined by Annie, a survivor of interpersonal violence. With October being Domestic Violence Awareness Month, Dr. Makunda wanted to feature Annie to share her story of overcoming her situation and taking back control. 1:45 - Annie shares some about herself and her personal history of abuse, including physical and psychological abuse from her parents and her domestic partners. Annie had a negative relationship with her mother, who was very controlling, physically abusive, and socially isolated Annie. Annie’s father was an older man, a laid-off factory worker and rather removed from family interaction. 6:07 - Despite her parents raising her in Depression-era mindset, Annie’s parents wanted her to get a good education and attend a private school. Annie faced a lot of bullying in public school, so she attended a boarding school for high school, where she lived full-time in her junior year. This was the time she started dating her first boyfriend, who would later become her husband. 8:25 - Dr. Makunda asks Annie what drew her to her boyfriend, which now she would read as warning signs. Annie describes that her boyfriend was not nice, often teasing and putting her down, and he didn’t offer kind or compassionate communication. He also isolated Annie from her friends and social events, especially when other men were involved. Resistance from her mother towards the relationship drove Annie to stay with this man even more. 11:30 - Dr. Makunda reinforces that so much of what we see and experience as children can shape our future, and we should be mindful of what we expose our own kids to in their young lives. Annie missed the red flags in her partner because she saw that as normal behavior, as expressed by her mother. 12:55 - Annie was accepted at the University of Pennsylvania (UPenn) while her boyfriend went to Cornell, although she was afraid to end the relationship despite the distance. While she established a social life, Annie still felt the tension of her boyfriend telling her who she could interact with and he continued to place a lot of limitations and ultimations on what she could do. 15:13 - Annie declared her major in Sociology and sub-matriculated into the Social Work program, which meant she could begin to take graduate studies at the same time as finishing her undergraduate degree. Her boyfriend was unhappy with that decision because she would be in Philadelphia longer and her parents were also disappointed because they expected that a prep school and Ivy League education would result in a more lucrative occupation. Annie’s parents ultimately withdrew their financial support because of her decision, and she had to figure out how to support herself in school. 19:38 - Under another ultimatum to come visit her boyfriend, Annie caught a ride with a friend to go see him when they got into a car accident. She suffered a bilateral concussion, several broken ribs, a lacerated liver, and a punctured lung, and had to be in the ICU for two weeks. Whenever she awoke in the hospital, she was surrounded by the people trying to manipulate and control her - the boyfriend and her parents. 21:23 - After getting out of the hospital, Annie was caught between her parents, who would pay for school if she studied business and changed her living arrangements, and her boyfriend, who wanted her to live with him and switch to his university. She decided to live with her boyfriend, take a semester off, worked with different agencies, and got accepted into the Bachelor of Social Work next semester. 26:02 - Annie describes living with her boyfriend at Cornell as a little bit of a honeymoon period, despite the controlling limitations he placed on her, like not allowing her to wear tie dye, volunteer or work with men, or contact her friends in Philadelphia. The manipulation her boyfriend exercised on her was framed by trying to help protect Annie from bad influences, and for her, he was a safe place at that time. 29:50 - Dr. Makunda asks if Annie’s boyfriend had a social life, even if she wasn’t allowed to. Annie says that many of his limits on her didn’t apply to him. He rushed a fraternity although he told her she couldn’t join a sorority; he had friends from a wide variety of activities and extracurriculars, despite telling her that she would ruin their relationship if she did the same. 34:24 - Annie also experienced financial abuse from her partner, especially after she received a sizeable settlement from the car accident. She was pressured to spend excessively to fit in with his wealthy family, and she had the voices of her parents in her mind saying money will always be more important than happiness. Her settlement money disappeared quickly, and after they got married, she was assured that continuing to spend was okay because her husband would always have a job at his father’s company. 36:12 - Annie started to go to a gym, which she enjoyed, but she also found a group of people that she connected with socially. Her husband did not like these friendly relationships and did not allow her to interact with them socially - especially as her money was spent or shared with him and he exercised control over what she could do financially. 39:00 - Thank you to Annie for sharing the details of your life story. Make sure you tune in for the next podcast to hear Part Two of Annie’s story. --- Find out more about the history of Domestic Violence Awareness Month (DVAM): https://nrcdv.org/dvam/DVAM-history (https://nrcdv.org/dvam/DVAM-history) RAINN https://www.rainn.org/ (https://www.rainn.org/) | The nation's largest anti-sexual violence organization. They organize and run a National Sexual Assault Hotline. Also, you can get the latest news on the work RAINN is doing every day to end sexual violence. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy (https://acast.com/privacy) for more information.

8. 

   1 Oct 2019

   Episode 12: When Love Hurts.

   Uninhibited Podcast Shownotes Season 2, Episode 2 Sharika Welcome to Season Two of Uninhibited, a podcast with the mission to discuss taboo, multicultural, multi-generational, and multi-layered topics that matter to women. Our host, Dr. Makunda Abdul Mbacke, is an Ivy-League trained OBGYN, practicing medicine in rural America. She is a mother, career professional, part of Generation X, and so much more. --- 1:00 - Today, Dr. Makunda is joined by Sharika, an outreach advocate with a local survivor response group. Sharika is going to discuss intimate partner violence (also known as IPV) in teens and young adults. Statistically, 1 out of 5 women and 1 out of 7 men have experienced intimate partner violence in their lifetimes, and most have experienced this before the age of 18. 2:52 - Sharika introduces herself and shares some information about her professional background. In doing some research for this podcast, Sharika found out some shocking statistics that indicate that IPV is still a present and increasing problem; for example, 80% of girls who have been physically abused in IPV relationships continue to date the abuser. 5:42 - Sharika shares some of the stories of teenagers that she’s worked with who have experienced IPV, and each case is very different from the next because this type of violence is so personal and painful. Although physical abuse is absolutely damaging, intimate partner violence also manifests in other ways, like controlling behavior, emotional manipulation, or isolating someone from their family and friends. 11:30 - What are some of the warning signs of violence to be on the lookout for? Warning signs are typically found within the behavioral and social aspects of our lives. Observe how a person acts with others in their life - friends, family - and see if it aligns with what they’ve told about their relationships with those people. Demonstrations of aggression, anti-social, and jealous behavior can also be warning signs; listen to what they say about past relationship, if they accept responsibility for their actions. These are indicators of how someone may act towards you. 14:56 - When does behavior cross the line from teenage-attachment kind of love to excessive and potentially dangerous? That point can be hard to pin down, but most people realize it when they can no longer have alone time, watch TV, do homework or have a little peace away from their partner. 15:58 - Dr. Makunda asks Sharika if there is a difference between how IPV manifests between younger couples vs. older couples. Sharika explains that the patterns of violence - control, manipulation, isolation - are very similar in abusers, despite age. So many people misinterpret constant texting, calling or demands on time as love and care, when really, it’s about control and fear. 20:47 - What are the warning signs that we can look for as parents, guardians, or other loved ones? Sharika explains that paying attention is key; there aren’t any specific warning signs to watch for, because each child, teen, and young adult is different. Observing prolonged personality differences, or changes in demeanor, then give them a standing offer to come to you or another trusted person with any problem they may have. 25:15 - If you’re in a situation where you know abuse is happening to your child or loved one, but they are insistent on continuing to be in the abusive relationship, do not make every conversation about the abuser and your dislike of the situation. Rephrase the conversation away from negative comments to reassure your loved one that you are there to support them - “I love you,” “Home will always be a safe place for you,” and similar words of comfort. Prove the abuser wrong by showing love and support (and yes, we know this is hard). 30:48 - What can we do to ensure we are promoting healthy relationships? Re-evaluate our own relationships, refrain from the do-as-I-say-not-as-I-do approach, and realize that teens and young people are aware of the actions of their elders. Show healthy relationships through communication and honesty; offer yourself to listen without interruption; be consistent with your probing questions that show support (how can I help, what do you need from me?). --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- RAINN https://www.rainn.org/ (https://www.rainn.org/) | The nation's largest anti-sexual violence organization. They organize and run a National Sexual Assault Hotline. Also, you can get the latest news on the work RAINN is doing every day to end sexual violence. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy (https://acast.com/privacy) for more information.

9. 

   17 Sept 2019

   Episode 11: Breast Cancer Awareness

   Uninhibited Podcast Shownotes Episode 1, Season 2: Terralyn, Breast Cancer Survivor Welcome to Uninhibited, a podcast with the mission to discuss taboo, multicultural, multi-generational, and multi-layered topics that matter to women. Our host, Dr. Makunda Abdul Mbacke, is an Ivy-League trained OBGYN, practicing medicine in rural America. She is a mother, career professional, part of Generation X, and so much more. --- 1:00 - Today’s guest is Ms. Terralyn “Terri” House, a breast cancer survivor with unique experiences. She will walk us through what it was like receiving her diagnosis, going through treatment, and life after cancer. 1:38 - Terri shares some background about who she is and the start of her breast cancer journey when she received her diagnosis in 2010. Through a self-examination, Terri discovered a lump on her breast and she took the initiative to get it checked by her doctor the next day. However, after a mammogram, she was informed that the lump was just a cyst. 4:12 - At that time, Terri was also under the care of Dr. Makunda. Since there was no follow up plan with her primary care doctor, Terri asked if Dr. Makunda would remove the cyst at their next examination. The lump was actually too dense to remove in the office, and further examination led Dr. Makunda requesting a second mammogram for Terri. Terri approached this second mammogram with the determination that some sort of action would result from her visit. 7:55 - For the second mammogram, Terri informed her healthcare providers that she wanted to speak with the doctor to review her results and options to either remove or biopsy the lump. They chose to biopsy, and two days later, Terri found out that she had breast cancer. 9:18 - Terri’s first thought was of survival, which also meant making the decision to leave her more rural area for somewhere better equipped for her care. She began the process of researching facilities and contacting practitioners straight away. On a Saturday, she received a call from a nurse at Duke, reassuring Terri that they had received her message and would reach out on Monday. The fact that they cared enough about her wellbeing to call on a weekend made Terri certain she was choosing the right care by choosing Duke. 13:10 - Terri shares some details about the level of care that she received from Duke, which felt like a more holistic approach. This included shrinking and removing the lump, and an oral form of chemotherapy. Terri also credits her good health going into her cancer experience, which allowed doctors to try more with her treatments because her body and mindset were strong and healthy. 17:25 - She started with chemotherapy every two weeks until the lump shrunk enough to allow for a less-invasive surgery. After the removal, Terri started radiation treatments once per week at her local hospital. From there, she moved on to the oral form of chemotherapy. 18:55 - After backing off from the chemo treatments and the side effects lessened, Terri was released to the Survivor’s Clinic a full year early. She attends the Clinic once a year for a full review - bloodwork, a mammogram - to ensure that she remains cancer free! 21:02 - Dr. Makunda asks Terri what the important lessons she wants to share with others after going through this experience. Terri found it was very important for her to inform the attending medical students at Duke Hospital about “listening to your patient.” Terri also voiced her concerns and found practitioners, like Dr. Makunda, who would take her seriously. Lastly, she feels it is paramount that patients are partners and active participants in their treatment plans. 22:45 - Terri shares some about the diet she maintained before cancer and during treatment. For her, diet played an important role, eating living foods that gave her body nutrients and strength. She found she never lost her appetite during her chemo treatments, and she stuck to a healthy diet to help her body fight. 27:10 - “Just listen to your body, absolutely. Women, listen to your body!” - Terralyn House --------- Breast Cancer Resources: Duke Health Cancer Center (https://www.dukehealth.org/locations/duke-cancer-center) How to Conduct a Breast Self-Exam (https://www.nationalbreastcancer.org/breast-self-exam) A breast examination should be a routine part of your annual well-woman exam. If you are not sure if this is being conducted, remember you can be your own advocate and ask a nurse or doctor the next time you go! Remember, you can Google “free cancer screenings” to see what offerings are provided around your local area! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy (https://acast.com/privacy) for more information.

10. 

    10 Sept 2019

    Episode 10: Awakening: Part 2 Life after Illness with Dr.Kristen Reihman

    Uninhibited Podcast Shownotes Episode: Dr. Kristin Part 2 Welcome to Uninhibited, a podcast with the mission to discuss taboo, multicultural, multi-generational, and multi-layered topics that matter to women. Our host, Dr. Makunda Abdul Mbacke, is an Ivy-League trained OBGYN, practicing medicine in rural America. She is a mother, career professional, part of Generation X, and so much more. --- :48 - Dr. Makunda is back this week to finish a two-part interview with Dr. Kristin Ryman, who is a family doctor living in Allentown, PA. She’s a married mother of four and three-time survivor of Lyme disease. 1:50 - Dr. Kristin made the decision to live and fight her Lyme disease, she felt like her body made the choice for her and her spirit and brain had to catch up for a few months. She experienced improvement in her being due to making the choice to live, even though the pain was 10 out of 10 every time she stood up, the suffering had all disappeared. Over the next couple of years she focused on making choices that brought her joy and not suffering. 5:50 - Dr. Kristin went back to work despite not wanting to be a doctor anymore or wanting to work in the clinic because much of what she had learned during her experience with Lyme was that some of the tools of her craft that she was trained to use could make people sick and make people with Lyme disease even sicker. 7:48 - Dr. Kristin explains that being a doctor comes with many rewards but she believes many doctors are surprised when they start their first job, she describes the struggle of only getting around 7 mins to develop relationships with her patients, the pain of dealing with insurance companies to get paid and the amount of paperwork that she has to complete at home for insurance companies even though they often still won't pay for her services. 9:37 - Once Dr. Kristin went back into the workforce, she worked at the clinic temporarily, where she resolved that she wanted to heal the relationships that were broken due to resentment over her leaving work when she was sick. 11:05 - Dr. Kristin eventually left the clinic to start her own practice in her living room where she could practice in the most non toxic, loving and supportive place she could imagine in the world. She felt her house would help support her as she learned to be a doctor again. 11:35 - Dr. Makunda asks if she was at that time doing more integrative medicine. Dr. Kristin explained that she created a very focused Lyme consulting practice. During her recovery, she got in contact with all the Lyme support groups in her area, a lot of the famous Lyme doctors in her area who told her once she got well to call them because they had a list of people who could not get in to see a doctor who had a background in Lyme. 13.55 - Dr. Makunda asks Dr. Kristin to share her success stories working with patients in her new practice. Dr. Kristin shares that people who were plagued by Lyme’s many symptoms of dysfunction did improve. She also shared that she is still learning all the ways our immune system can break down and allow a Lyme infection to become so severe and prevent recovery. She spends an hour with each patient, troubleshooting and determining their treatment. 14:50 - Dr. Makunda asked Dr. Kristin what her treatment plans look like and how she makes a diagnosis, especially with many patients believing they have Lyme despite their test results. Dr. Kristin explained that it is heavily dependant on the person, their story and the tools they have to help their treatment plan. Her preference is to avoid testing because the current testing available is limited and misleading and a waste of time and money. The better tests are considered experimental and thus not often covered by insurance companies and they are still not 100% accurate. 16:35 - Dr. Kristin discusses starting her patients with an elimination diet because it can remove many symptoms allowing her to focus on the symptoms that are left. This method makest is easier to make a clinical diagnosis based on what symptoms are present and which symptoms went away. 17:00 - Dr. Kirstin describes the elimination diet she uses to heal the gut. She starts with the Institute for Functional Medicine's basic elimination diet. It takes out the top ten allergens or potential secondary allergens, these are the foods that can create inflammation if inflammation is already present. 17:16 - Dr. Kristin describes foods that create inflammation in everyone and that the level of irritants is different for everyone. Gluten can create micro-tears in the gut lining, which can lead to inflammation, this often leads to leaky gut. Other foods can act like allergens because they can slip into your bloodstream, not fully digestion and therefore look like foreign invaders to your immune system and that leads to a feedback loop that leads your immune system back at the gut again and again until the gut is healed by removing all those things for a period of time or it will continue to attack itself. 18:40 - Dr. Makunda asks if Dr. Kristin began her healing with an elimination diet. Dr. Kristin did not because she did not know about the elimination diet until around a year into her illness. During the year leading up to her discovery of the elimination diet, she was doing a lot of spiritual work, looking at old wounds and unforgiveness, she was healing relationships with her friends in the clinic, basically, people who were disappointed by her absence and the people she imagined were disappointed about her absence. She was taking herbs and biofilm busters because Lyme creates a lot of Biofilm to live in, taking homeopathic, regular acupuncture and yoga. Dr. Kristin explained that she went to a Functional Medicine Conference where she learned about the elimination diet. 22:25 - Dr. Kristin discussed how the landscape has changed in terms of allergies and obesity where we have gone from one kid with a peanut allergy and one kid who is obese at school to more and more people with obesity and allergies. She believes this is due to us soaking in toxins from our environment but bodies that can only process so many toxins each day. 26:00 - Dr. Makunda and Dr. Kristin discuss our current environment and sources of toxins including BPA in water bottles, Teflon on frying pans, cell phones, and cell phone towers. But, the majority of the medical community not addressing these toxins citing a lack of scientific evidence. Dr. Kristin answers these calls for evidence by helping people take a look back at what our ancestors dealt with and compare it with the toxins in our current environment. 30:00 - Dr. Kristine said “The gluten we eat today is genetically modified and has 40 times the content that our ancestors may have stumbled across. Also, organic wheat can be spread with roundup that is very toxic to the gut.” 31:50 - Dr. Kristin’s children challenged her to try gluten again by saying, “Mom, you always say any gut can heal from any food.” So, a couple of Thanksgiving’s ago she added gluten back in for a test by baking and eating a couple of pies. She did not get gassy or bloated but she did feel a tingle in her hands and feet. This was just an experiment, she has not eaten gluten since, and she doesn’t believe anyone should be eating gluten. ---- International Lyme and Associated Diseases Society - https://www.ilads.org (https://www.ilads.org/) Attend conferences, read news from the Board, find resources, and read up on the latest Lyme research and literature. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy (https://acast.com/privacy) for more information.

11. 

    3 Sept 2019

    Episode 9: Awakening: Life after Illness with Dr. Kristin Reihman

    Uninhibited Podcast Shownotes Episode: Dr. Kristin Welcome to Uninhibited, a podcast with the mission to discuss taboo, multicultural, multi-generational, and multi-layered topics that matter to women. Our host, Dr. Makunda Abdul Mbacke, is an Ivy-League trained OBGYN, practicing medicine in rural America. She is a mother, career professional, part of Generation X, and so much more. --- 1:07 - Our guest today is Dr. Kristin Ryman, who is a family doctor living in Allentown, PA. She’s a married mother of four and three-time survivor of Lyme disease. 1:45 - Dr. Kristin shares about her life trajectory before the illness changed her life. She was on a path of entering traditional medicine, training at Stanford and choosing a longer-term residency in Pennsylvania, which allowed her to also juggle having kids and being a mom. During this time, Dr. Kristin received the tick bite that transmitted the Lyme disease that triggered her health challenges. 3:24 - After receiving the tick bite while in residency, Dr. Kristin used her resources to find out more about the disease. She didn’t have typical symptoms, like a bullseye rash, but treated herself with four weeks of antibiotics, which she had been trained to do. 5:12 - As life went on - two more children, graduation, becoming faculty - work duties and stress intensified. In 2011, Dr. Kristin realized she hadn’t felt herself for about six months. It was only after a patient came to her claiming she had chronic Lyme disease (and described all the awful symptoms, and handed over all the internet research she had done) that Dr. Kristin realized how much she didn’t know about the disease. 9:00 - Dr. Kristin learned that there are two schools of thought about Lyme Disease - the traditional and the “crazy Lyme doctors.” The crazy Lyme doctors are actually called the International Lyme and Associated Disease Society (https://www.ilads.org/), and have established their own set of evidence-based, peer-reviewed research and guidelines that don’t even enter into traditional medical education. There was so much about Lyme that traditional medical education hadn’t taught her. This set off the lightbulb that maybe this was the disease that was haunting Dr. Kristin herself. 11:50 - Dr. Kristin didn’t initially go get medical advice or treatment for herself because the testing for Lyme is highly inaccurate and insensitive to the active disease. 13:32 - Her recommendation for determining if you have Lyme (even if a doctor initially says you don’t) is to listen to your body. If you know there is something wrong within your body, just because a test says there is nothing wrong doesn’t mean you stop fighting to find answers. 15:00 - Dr. Kristin spent about a month researching and panicking, trying to find out if she really did have Lyme disease. She describes it as feeling as if she had taken on some of her patient’s fear. Everything she found continued to point to Lyme as the culprit of all of her health issues, so she started to pursue aggressive antibiotic treatment. 18:45 - Dr. Makunda asks when Dr. Kristin started to feel better again, once she started treatment. Dr. Kristin explains that it took about a month of taking pills, feeling strange pains in her body, sleeping 12 hours a night, having strange neurological experiences, before she started to feel more like herself. She shares that the side effects, like the crippling brain fog, and co-infections of Lyme have derailed her ability to function. 22:40 - “The biggest piece for me was I am learning things that I can’t unlearn and I don’t think that this new set of information makes me very welcome in medicine.” - Dr. Kristin speaks to the marginalization she felt as she learned more about Lyme that isn’t exactly welcome in traditional medicine. 26:30 - After ending the second round of her antibiotics, Dr. Kristin woke up one day slammed by all of her symptoms again. She visited a chiropractor that same day, which didn’t help her symptoms, but seemed to impart a calm that overrode her fear - she knew that she would be able to handle this. The next morning, all her previous symptoms were gone, but replaced with a terrible sciatic nerve pain in her right leg. That pain haunted her for the next two and a half years. 32:56 - One of the possible answers doctors had for Dr. Kristin was a bulging disk, for which they offered surgery. Dr. Kristin explains that she resisted the idea of surgery for about six months, before the pain drove her back to ask the surgeon to go ahead with it. He actually told her he wouldn’t do it… but later had no recollection of this conversation. 34:52 - Dr. Kristin explains how she started on her path of finally healing. The pivotal moment for her was about a month after being discharged from the hospital, on all types of pills and medications and herbal medicines, and she visited a homeopath. The homeopath gave her a remedy and gave her a new perspective to approach her life with. 42:40 - “I had a very clear knowing, and the knowing said this: If you are going to live, you are not going to live being fearful, you’re not going to live running around checking to see if anyone’s scattering kindling behind you because you’re going to be burned at the stake for being a crazy Lyme doctor. You’re going to birth yourself anew as whatever doctor you’re going to be, and you’re going to be that.” - Dr. Kristin ---- International Lyme and Associated Diseases Society - https://www.ilads.org (https://www.ilads.org/) Attend conferences, read news from the Board, find resources, and read up on the latest Lyme research and literature. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy (https://acast.com/privacy) for more information.

12. 

    27 Aug 2019

    Episode 8: When Being The Best Isn’t Good Enough.

    Uninhibited Podcast Shownotes Episode 8 Dr. Joy Baker Welcome to Uninhibited, a podcast with the mission to discuss taboo, multicultural, multi-generational, and multi-layered topics that matter to women. Our host, Dr. Makunda Abdul Mbacke, is an Ivy-League trained OBGYN, practicing medicine in rural America. She is a mother, career professional, part of Generation X, and so much more. --- 00:50 - Today, we’re joined by special guest, Dr. Joy Baker. Before getting started, Dr. Makunda shares a quote to honor the passing of Toni Morrison: “I tell my students, 'When you get these jobs that you have been so brilliantly trained for, just remember that your real job is that if you are free, you need to free somebody else. If you have some power, then your job is to empower somebody else. This is not just a grab-bag candy game.” 2:00 - Dr. Joy Baker introduces herself. She is an obstetrician and gynecologist in rural Georgia and is going to talk with us about pay equity and women in the workforce. 2:44 - Dr. Baker speaks to her training, how she found her profession and current position. Dr. Baker completed her education and residency at a large hospital in Atlanta, GA, but knew that she wanted to work outside of the metro-Atlanta area upon graduation. Having come from small-town life, Dr. Baker knew the challenges facing smaller communities and Georgia as a state in terms of providing maternal care. 3:20 - Dr. Makunda comments that she read that some women have to travel 2-3 hours in order to find care, which Dr. Baker confirms, calling these places “maternal healthcare deserts” or “obstetric deserts”. 4:15 - Dr. Baker graduated as the top resident of her training program and was awarded the Next Generation Healer Award. She ran with the mission of her program, which was to serve the underserved, so she went to Columbus and jumped into an attending position. Throughout her two years in that position, Dr. Baker dealt with many workplace issues and was under undue pressure to prove her value. 6:15 - Dr. Baker found her next position almost by accident. In a call to gather records on a patient, she spoke with a labor and delivery nurse who mentioned that their care center only had temporary OBGYNs. This absence of stable care piqued Dr. Baker’s interest, so she travelled out to the community to form her opinion of whether to make a move. She negotiated directly with the local hospital in order to get started with providing care as a temporary doctor. 9:10 - As time progressed and Dr. Baker began discussions about a permanent position, she later discovered that the other temp doctors were making more than double what she was making. As she worked through negotiations, Dr. Baker wanted to ensure that she could do the community work she feels so passionate about, like providing community health education and group prenatal care. 12:45 - While working on negotiating her contract, Dr. Baker was able to secure good benefits, as well as raises every year. However, she accidentally found out that her production bonuses were 9-10 times lower than the other surgical specialists were being paid, which is a huge monetary difference. 15:40 - Dr. Makunda asks Dr. Baker to expand on her experience at the hospital, after being partnered with another doctor whom they said she was “lucky” to work with. Dr. Baker explains “I just sort of absorbed that with no comment because I’m an African American female and I trained at a historically black institution, so I was prepared for the fact that people might underestimate me or discount my skill set just because of my race and my gender.” 20:05 - Dr. Baker goes into some detail about how she found out about the discrepancy between her and her partner’s pay. Dr. Baker was trying to ensure equitable compensation for an advanced practitioner brought into their practice, and through a discussion with a director, discovered that her productivity pay was far less than the standard amount. So, she started asking questions. 25:14 - Dr. Baker was understandably angry, especially considering there was no justification for the huge pay disparity. At the root of it, she felt de-valued and unappreciated for the dedication, time, and care that she put into her work. Dr. Baker involved the CEO and Director of Physician Practices in the situation, and came prepared to a meeting with data to back up her worth, her hard work, and the industry standards for the amount she should have been compensated. 30:50 - After making a well-researched, well-argued, and very direct ask to be paid the same as her partner (for doing most of the work at the practice), Dr. Baker continued to face an uphill battle. The Director of Physician Services that she met with was terminated, so she had to start her negotiation all over again. Then the Interim Director was terminated, followed by the CEO. She found herself advocating for her case over and over again. 37:11 - Dr. Makunda makes the observation that women generally seek female OBs, so this should be a professional field where women are paid the most - yet we still face pay disparity within OB generalists to specialists. 38: 23 - Dr. Baker’s partner took on locum (temporary) work at another facility to earn additional money, so she pursued the same. After three months of working additional hours at another facility, she was asked by the Director and an HR representative to stop that work. This discussion uncovered more disparities between how Dr. Baker and her partner were treated, and even more discrepancies in Dr. Baker’s pay. 41:44 - Despite Dr. Baker’s significant contributions to growing and transforming the practice, she was still not being treated or paid fairly or adequately. That was the final straw that caused her to leave. 42:29 - Dr. Baker is moving on to a different hospital-owned practice and is being placed on a leadership track where she can pursue her interests and passions along with her clinical practice. Through her experience, she wants to try to help other women avoid the pitfalls and obstacles that she has run into, as well as empower people coming out of residency to know how to advocate for themselves and negotiate strongly. 44:15 - “To women who are in these situations, the one thing I would say is speak out! Going to my administrators and presenting the facts, presenting what my productivity had been and the fact that it was higher than most people in my region - I had to tell them Look, this is what I’m bringing to the table and I deserve to be compensated equitably.” - Dr. Joy Baker Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy (https://acast.com/privacy) for more information.

13. 

    20 Aug 2019

    Episode 7 Locked Up

    Uninhibited Podcast Shownotes Episode 7: Incarceration with Keevy Welcome to Uninhibited, a podcast with the mission to discuss taboo, multicultural, multi-generational, and multi-layered topics that matter to women. Our host, Dr. Makunda Abdul Mbacke, is an Ivy-League trained OBGYN, practicing medicine in rural America. She is a mother, career professional, part of Generation X, and so much more. --- 0:57 - Today, Dr. Makunda is joined by Keevy Hairston, who is here to share her story about loving someone who is incarcerated, and the process of welcoming that person back into home life and regular society after release. 2:17 - Keevy tells us about the beginning of her relationship with her husband, Marcus, how they met in 2001 and fell in love soon after. They welcomed a son in 2003 and got married in 2005. She also shares about Marcus’ background and when he first was arrested in 2008 for possession of marijuana and possession of a firearm. 6:50 - Keevy explains what happened after Marcus was first arrested and moving through the legal process, which all occurred within 2008. He served 3 years in a facility that was 2 hours away from his family. 9:20 - At the time of Marcus’ arrest, their son was only 5 years old, but knew that his daddy was in jail for a while. Keevy explains that her son struggled with behavioral problems as he started kindergarten while also dealing with the absence of his father. She found so much help and comfort in his teachers during that time. 14:23 - Keevy’s daughter was 13 at the time so she understood more of the situation, and had more distractions with her friends and activities in middle school, so was able to cope better. She expressed sadness over Marcus’ arrest, but also provided comfort to her mother and brother so they could navigate the situation together. 15:33 - As for Keevy, she felt the impact of losing Marcus as a partner and as her children’s father. Keevy was also dealing with the fact that both of her parents were also incarcerated at the same time that Marcus was. She found stability and comfort through her faith and the church, which helped her regain peace in her life. 17:37 - Keevy talks about the difficult logistics and cost of visiting Marcus while he was incarcerated. Visiting him was great for the family, as they would be able to get a whole day with him, get to hug him, and play games together, but it was always heartbreaking to leave him. 20:20 - Keevy discusses her decision to stay with Marcus while he was incarcerated. Just because he was arrested, didn’t mean that she stopped loving him. She also felt strongly that her children needed the bond with their father. 21:38 - When Marcus was released, he first went to a halfway house for a few months, with visitation home on the weekends. At this time, their son was 8 and their daughter was 16 years old. Marcus’ full homecoming was a very exciting and happy occasion, although everyone did have a readjustment period to learn how to live together again. 25:50 - Keevy explains some of the difficulties of coming back together as a family, mainly that Marcus had to readjust again to fit how the family worked. He invested one-on-one time with the kids to learn who they were and how they had changed while he was gone. 27:07 - Thankfully, Keevy and Marcus remained a strong couple, communicating as often as they could. She found more of her independence while Marcus was away, so they had to re-learn how to live together once he came home. 28:35 - Dr. Makunda and Keevy discuss the complications of Marcus being arrested for marijuana possession, when now it has started to be legalized in many states. Keevy notes that she has a cousin who was given a 55 year sentence for possession and intent to sell a relatively small amount of drugs, which is a longer sentence than most murder cases are handed. The argument isn’t for the legalization of all drugs, but for smarter and more equitable sentencing methods. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy (https://acast.com/privacy) for more information.

14. 

    13 Aug 2019

    Episode 6: Human trafficking in rural America

    Uninhibited Podcast Shownotes Episode 6: Human Trafficking & Sexual Abuse Advocacy Welcome to Uninhibited, a podcast with the mission to discuss taboo, multicultural, multi-generational, and multi-layered topics that matter to women. Our host, Dr. Makunda Abdul Mbacke, is an Ivy-League trained OBGYN, practicing medicine in rural America. She is a mother, career professional, part of Generation X, and so much more. --- 1:00 - Today, Dr. Makunda is joined by Ms. Mary Jones, a sexual abuse counselor that Dr. Makunda met through her own work with patients that need special counseling. 1:57 - Mary is a Sexual Assault Victim Advocate at Southside Survivor Response Center in Martinsville, VA. Her main role is to help and assist sexual assault victims by accompanying them to forensic exams, police interviews, attorney’s visits, and anything else that they need. She emphasizes that she is also there for her clients emotional wellbeing. 2:47 - Dr. Makunda asks how did Mary found interest in this field. Is this something she knew she wanted to do since college, or did she discover this profession later on? Mary did not stumble into this work. She had her own sexual assault experience at a young age and felt she couldn’t tell any of the adults in her life. As a young adult, a friend of Mary’s was raped and had no family near her - so she turned to Mary for help. 4:15 - Witnessing the suffering of her friend and seeing the lack of support for victims of assault motivated Mary to move into the medical field to help people, where she continued to see a growing need for sexual assault advocates. Later, she went back to school, earned her MBA, then earned another Masters degree in Human Services. Mary knew that this was the path that she needed to follow. 5:15 - Right before she graduated with her Masters in Human Services, Mary found a part time sexual assault victims advocate position in Virginia, which she applied to and got! Through that work, she helped open up an office in Danville in 2012, a community which previously didn’t have those kinds of services. 6:21 - Opening the office was widely supported in the Danville community, getting news coverage and positive support from residents of the town. In Mary’s first support group, she had over 16 people in attendance, and within the first year of the Danville office opening, Mary assisted 76 victims, demonstrating that they were providing a much needed service. Despite the huge need, the grant for the office ran out two years later, leading Mary to a position in Martinsville, where she has been for the last five years. 7:40 - Dr. Makunda explains to listeners that she and Mary live and work in a very small, rural part of Virginia, where services are needed but not always provided or funded as they should be. Dr. Makunda asks Mary to give some insight on the issue of human trafficking in their somewhat sleepy, Southern town. Mary explains that, unfortunately, human trafficking looks the same in a small town as it does in a big city. Human trafficking is a criminal activity in which people profit from the control and exportation of others. There are two kinds of human trafficking: sex trafficking and labor trafficking. This abuse can happen anywhere, to children and adults, citizens and non-citizens, and all genders. It is a unique crime because it is hard to identify, investigate, and prosecute. Mary did some research on current trafficking statistics, which found that the US is the world’s largest consumer of human trafficking. 12:23 - Dr. Makunda asks Mary what human trafficking looks like in their home of Henry County; Who are the traffickers and who is being trafficked? Mary tells us that traffickers can operate individually or in an organized group, like a gang, although she has dealt with cases where family members have acted as traffickers. Traffickers seem to pray on young people, foreigners, runaways, homeless people, victims of sexual or domestic violence, those that live in poverty, those desperately looking to improve their lives somehow, people suffering from substance abuse, those with mental illness - they target vulnerable people. 14:50 - Dr. Makunda asks if traffickers typically keep their victims in the same location, or if it’s normal for them to relocate. Mary explains that rarely, traffickers will move their victims around - typically to other southern states on the east coast. But normally, victims usually end up working within the same place where they were trafficked. 16:07 - Dr. Makunda inquires about how traffickers get to know and build trust with their victims. Mary explains that traffickers have a rather easy time targeting their victims in places that you might not expect, like the mall or a state fair, where a lot of teenagers are present. Occasionally, traffickers have people working with them, like a female friend or even a child who can more easily earn the trust of the victim. 18:06 - What keeps victims of human trafficking trapped, even if they want to escape? Fear, mostly. It’s difficult for victims to escape because traffickers don’t want them to inform authorities or lose business, so traffickers make threats against the individual or their loved ones. 19:22 - Dr. Makunda asks Mary to tell us about some success stories of those who escaped human trafficking situations. Mary tells of an air stewardess who noticed a nicely dressed older man accompanying a young girl who appeared disheveled. The stewardess attempted to make conversation with them, but the man was very aggressive and did not want to talk. When the girl got up to go to the bathroom, the stewardess left the girl a note in the bathroom and the girl responded to the note, indicating she was in trouble and needed help. The stewardess informed the pilot and they were able to rescue the girl when the plane landed. 21:40 - Dr. Makunda asks Mary what signs parents can look out for to help someone who may be targeted by traffickers. Mary says to look for people who look like they don’t exactly go together, like the old man and girl on the plane. Another sign is to look for children coming home with expensive gifts like a new phone, something out of the ordinary that they might not be able to afford. 23:50 - If we start to notice these signs, what are the things that parents can do to protect their kids? Mary emphasizes the importance of parents talking to their children about sex trafficking and discuss ways that children may be targeted by a trafficker, that promises of making their dreams come true can be enticing but also a lie. Parents should also be involved with their child’s social media, know who they’re talking to online, because that is another way traffickers can contact victims. 26:08 - If you suspect something with your own child or someone else in the community, what are the next steps someone should take to help? Mary says it is best to talk to law enforcement, or call a sexual assault center like Mary’s office for help. It’s better to get the situation checked out and investigated than to ignore it, even if it ends up not being a trafficking case. 28:00 - Dr. Makunda asks why trafficking is such a difficult crime to prosecute? Mary explains that it is much easier to prosecute if the victim talks to law enforcement. But, it can be so hard for victims to speak out against their trafficker and retell their painful experiences; sometimes parents don’t want their children to go through that either. In some cases where the abuse happens between family members, a family may choose to let the problem go unaddressed rather than destroy relationships. 29:32 - What has been the process of working with victims when they seek help, especially in situations where the trafficker may not be prosecuted and see justice done? Mary says the most important thing is to build up the victim and revive their self-esteem. When working with younger children, she uses games to help them express and understand their emotions, and to help her understand how to assist the child. 31:33 - “Human trafficking, sexual trafficking, labor trafficking knows no borders, it doesn’t discriminate on race or class or age, even. It’s so important to understand that yes, it can happen in my little neighborhood, yes, it can happen on my little street. I challenge each of us to be that stewardess, to be vigilant and notice the people around us.” - Dr. Makunda If you or someone that you know has experienced abuse or are in a trafficking situation, there are resources that are available to help you. Southside Survivor Response Center (http://www.ssrcenter.org/index.cfm) You can also contact Mary Jones at 276-403-4085. If you are outside of the Virginia area, you can contact the Office for Victims of Crime, a component of the Office of Justice Programs, U.S. Department of Justice (https://ovc.ncjrs.gov/humantrafficking/providers.html). YOu can also seek out your local agencies for help. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy (https://acast.com/privacy) for more information.

15. 

    6 Aug 2019

    Episode 5: Real Talk

    Uninhibited Show Notes Episode 5: Abortion with Lou Welcome to Uninhibited, a podcast with the mission to discuss taboo, multicultural, multi-generational, and multi-layered topics that matter to women. Our host, Dr. Makunda Abdul Mbacke, is an Ivy-League trained OBGYN, practicing medicine in rural America. She is a mother, career professional, part of Generation X, and so much more. --- 1:29 - Today’s guest, Lou, introduces herself to us. Lou has worked in abortion clinics from 1990-1998, doing everything from scheduling appointments to going through informed consent, to assisting physicians with the abortion process. Importantly, Lou has acted as an advocate for women going through abortions. 2:05 - Dr. Makunda asks Lou why she did this job, what was so important or fulfilling about it? Lou’s reasoning is gounded in her own traumatic and abusive childhood, feeding her decision that nobody should have to go through what she had to. Her participation and advocacy for abortion rights and access could help prevent unwanted pregnancies and unhealthy childhoods. 2:50 - “Even though some people may feel that you’re taking life, in some ways, you feel that you’re giving life because of the difficult situations that you’ve seen some of the women were in.” - Dr. Makunda. 3:10 - Dr Makunda asks if there is a typical woman who comes seeking help at the clinic. Who were the people, backgrounds, and circumstances that Lou interacted with? Lou explains that women who come to the clinic came from all walks of life, and had varied backgrounds and experiences. The one commonality that she witnessed was their emotional states. There was a lot of grief and shame, fear and self-hatred surrounding their need for an abortion - this is never a choice that anybody really wants to make. 5:40 - “The statistics show that one out of four - 25% - of women in America will have a termination by the time they are in their 40s.” We all know someone who has gone through this experience and it shouldn’t make you think any less of them. 6:53 - Why do you think the safe availability of abortion is important? Women should have the right to choose what to do with their body and what to do with their lives. It’s as simple as that. The abortion debate that lawmakers and society is having is not about children. It’s about control, it’s about ownership, it’s about possession and keeping women subservient to the desires of another. 7:55 - Dr. Mackunda adds that the argument of the “pro-life” stance isn’t truly about protecting life, because those proponents have used violence against people who perform and advocate for safe abortion. 8:36 - Have you been at a clinic where there’s been protesting? Lou explains how she’s walked through picket lines, had her photo taken, had her car license plate and information taken down, while the clinics that she’s worked at experienced bomb threats, distraught and violent partners of clients, and threatening phone calls. 9:50 - Dr Makunda shares her own experience with Planned Parenthood and her interaction with the other services they provide (as abortion services only make up a small percentage). At 16, Dr. Macunda was contemplating becoming sexually active and made the choice to go to Planned Parenthood to discuss birth control options, leaving that same day with birth control pills. Having that choice and that resource made a world of difference in her own life. 11:30 - Dr. Makunda and Lou discuss how they view women’s bodies in today’s society, talking about how women’s bodies and agency are very much under attack. The actions occuring are about taking away education, access, and control over health and wellness decisions that extend past abortion. 12:36 - Lou and Dr. Makunda discuss how proper sex education and easy access to contraception can truly be part of the solution for America’s abortion issue. 13:50 - Lou makes the excellent point that if the opposing argument was truly about children, then there would be societal support systems in place to help take care of and raise those children. Instead, what we have currently is a system that prioritizes making money, which forces many people into situations where they can’t make ends meet. 14:30 - “It really is about women’s bodies, women’s voices, and women’s choices.” - Dr. Makunda 14:57 - Lou tells us about some common misconceptions that women discussed with her in the clinics, as well as societal misunderstandings. One widespread misconception that women have is that they should feel ashamed about having an abortion, that they had somehow failed their biological perogative of having children. 15:26 - Dr. Makunda asks Lou what scares her the most about what’s happening in America currently. Dr. Makunda elaborates that the scariest thing for her is that these new state laws limit safe abortions - dangerous abortions will still take place out of desparation and lack of access, which can lead to horrible outcomes for women. 17:00 - Lou agrees, also saying that society needs to shift the conversation to understand the root of the problem and why there is such a need for this type of control. She is also concerned about how regressive these laws and viewpoints can be - women can be seen more as possessions to be controlled, which can have dangerous consequences. 17:55 - Dr. Makunda brings up that this is an issue of wealth as well. Wealthy women will always have options and avenues to safe abortions. People with means will have their right to elective abortion protected because they can afford to pursue other options. Poor women without access to transportation, money, or support cannot access to such abortion options. 19:44 - Lou relays a story that really impacted her during her time at the clinic. A woman, addicted to drugs, came in at 24 weeks, which was the legal limit for abortions. They started the 3-day procedure and educated the client that she could not use drugs while undergoing treatment. On the second day, the client explained that she had used, which meant the clinic team had to stop and reverse the procedure. A week later, the woman realized she was pregnant with twins and that her children would be born addicted to drugs. She begged the clinic to help her, but they were unable to assist because of the 24-week limit. 22:30 - Ultimately, we need to work to keep abortion safe. As the #YouKnowMe campaign says, there are women who you know in your life who were able to make the right decision for themselves and their bodies. The decision to terminate a pregnancy is a deeply personal choice - it can be necessary from a trauma, it can be an economic decision, or a choice made by a young person so they can pursue a different course of life. 24:20 - Lou ends on the point that it is our duty as adults to give our children the best that we can offer. If we’re unable to provide that, then abortion can be a responsible choice to avoid unnecessary suffering. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy (https://acast.com/privacy) for more information.

16. 

    30 Jul 2019

    Episode 4: Daphne’s Story

    Uninhibited Podcast Shownotes Episode 4: Daphne’s Story Welcome to Uninhibited, a podcast with the mission to discuss taboo, multicultural, multi-generational, and multi-layered topics that matter to women. Our host, Dr. Makunda Abdul Mbacke, is an Ivy-League trained OBGYN, practicing medicine in rural America. She is a mother, career professional, part of Generation X, and so much more. --- 01:00 - Today, we’re joined by Ms. Daphne to talk about women’s rights, to understand why women need to have safe access to abortion, and to discuss her own experiences with escaping abuse. Daphne is a 31 year old white woman living in Texas with a young son, is a yoga teacher and minister who primarily works with survivors of domestic violence. 2:50 - Daphne gives us some background about her life and the dark places she found herself in the early 2000s. She met her son’s father, stopped using drugs, found yoga, and started to explore her own spiritual path. Daphne dives into the early stages of her relationship with her son’s father, and how, over time, she developed a feeling of safety with him while finding a sense of wholeness within herself. 8:21 - Dr. Makunda asks Daphne to share if her pregnancy was planned. Daphne explains that she and her partner were drinking heavily at the time, not practicing safe sex, and doesn’t remember many of her sexual encounters with him. She was about two months pregnant by the time she realized, but her partner promised his support and care for their child. 10:05 - Daphne explains that her pregnancy was the first extended time of her adulthood that she was completely sober, which allowed for a lot of her personal, spiritual and emotional growth. She discovered that she didn’t have much in common with her friends other than drinking alcohol. When she asked her partner to make healthy changes for their child, he made some adjustments and they set up boundaries to protect their family. 11:55 - Daphne describes how their living conditions and relationship changed after the birth of their son. Still living with her partner’s alcoholic father led to tension, and her partner directed much of his own anger and insecurities on Daphne. He would make her feel trapped and like she had no options of living on her own without him. 15:25 - Dr. Makunda asks how things changed once Daphne’s son was born. Daphne explains that it was “like a light switch flipping.” When the baby came, Daphne felt absolutely controlled, trapped, and like she couldn't leave - she understands now how this was complete manipulation by her partner and is something that is typical in abusive situations. 16:40 - When her son was about a year old, Daphne was physically assaulted by her partner for the first time and he ended up in jail. The situation was that Daphne felt that her partner had put their son in a threatening situation with an unsafe person, and her partner did not honor her desire to have that unsafe person removed from their house. When Daphne said she would ask them to leave and stood up for herself, her partner reacted with terrible physical violence. 20:40 - Daphne managed to escape the situation and get to her car, but was without a phone and her child. Not knowing what else to do, she drove to the local fire station, as her father had once told her to do. There, she found support and was able to meet the police at her house, where her partner was arrested and taken to jail. The next day, Daphne gave her father money to bail her partner out. Her father felt it was possible that he could make Daphne’s partner change by having a serious conversation, and Daphne detailed how difficult it was to get her parents to stop having contact with him. 25:00 - Daphne and Dr. Makunda discuss how religion and shared experiences made it difficult for Daphne’s father to be critical of her abuser. It seemed that Daphne’s father was sympathetic towards her abusive partner, rather than trying to protect his daughter, because he saw something within her partner that he had also experienced. 26:38 - “What I’ve learned through many experiences is that you can’t want for somebody else what they don’t want for themselves.” - Dr. Makunda 29:23 - Dr. Makunda asks how long Daphne stayed with her partner after that first violent experience, and what was the force that finally got her to leave him. Daphne explains that the incident happened in November 2015 and she left that following May of 2016. During the time before she escaped, the verbal and emotional abuse Daphne experienced intensified and her abuser made her feel small and helpless. She also experienced sexual abuse and rape from her abuser, but she didn’t know how to navigate these situations because he was also her partner. 31:00 - In the spring of 2016, Daphne went through a second yoga teacher training, during which she found she had grown and shifted within herself to fully realize and acknowledge that her partner was sexually and emotionally abusing her. That was the time that she knew she had to get out, or it would keep getting worse. She made a plan with her friend and her mother to move out with her son, and they went to live at a friend’s house. 32:20 - In Texas, the state can press charges against individuals with domestic abuse histories and put them into intervention programs. Daphne’s abuser was in one of these programs, but used the language and learnings from those sessions to attempt to manipulate her again. He would also use their son as a tool to create hope that things could get better. 33:04 - Three weeks after she left her abuser, Daphne found herself with him and he proceeded to get her drunk. He told her that she should stay and not drive home, but she woke up to him raping her again, which resulted in her second pregnancy. She was terrified and felt there was no option but to move back in with him, but her abuser refused to keep any of his promises about changing and getting help. 34:45 - Daphne shares a conversation she had with a friend, where she felt immense guilt over not wanting her pregnancy. Her friend supported her and explained that Daphne had a choice - that she did not have to live in terror, that she did not have to go through with a pregnancy that came from rape, that she was not trapped by her abuser. Daphne made an appointment at an abortion clinic and told her abuser that she was terminating the pregnancy and would not stay with him. 35:50 - Daphne was 12 weeks pregnant when she went to her appointment which meant she had to have a D&C procedure, and describes the physical and emotional pain she went through while simultaneously feeling empowered through her bodily autonomy. This process made her realize that she had power and she was the one with control over her and her child’s lives. 37:15 - Dr. Makunda asks Daphne to share more of her experience at the abortion clinic and how she felt in that environment. Daphne explains that the clinic in Dallas that she attended is always very busy, meaning there are always protesters outside. While protesters want to “save the life” of the fetus, Daphne argues that she needed to save her own life. She also goes into detail about the process itself, with a 4-hour appointment on day one and a 6-hour appointment on day two (Texas requires a 24 hour waiting period between the initial appointment and the procedure). 40:40 - “Having the chance to make that choice for myself, as difficult of a choice as it was, gave me the courage and confidence to continue making choices for myself that were in my best interest, regardless of what anyone else said or wanted of me.” - Daphne 41:23 - Dr. Makunda inquires about Daphne’s process of finally severing ties with her abuser and moving forward with her life. Daphne tells that, although it’s been a long and difficult journey, she has a supportive community around to help her. Her parents offer to help with her son and she has moved into more stable work as a priestess, an ordained minister, a coach and spiritual counselor at a wellness center, while also seeking to launch a non-profit organization to offer her services to survivors of domestic violence. 44:23 - An important aspect of domestic abuse situations that Daphne shares is that the violence doesn’t stop when you leave, and many people don’t realize that reality. In the first two weeks of leaving an abusive relationship, that survivor is 70 times more likely to be killed by their violent partner. The threat of abuse doesn’t just disappear. 45:39 - Dr. Makunda asks what Daphne’s advice would be to someone in a similar situation to hers. Daphne recommends finding the local domestic violence shelter because they will have the tools needed to keep survivors safe, find legal protection, and will have accommodations where survivors can stay in a protected space. Remember, survivors are not alone in this. 48:23 - Dr. Makunda asks Daphne to tell us about the “new” Daphne - the woman that is healed and whole. Daphne shares that yoga helped reconnect her to her spiritual path and understand her own experience, and her practice of power yoga helped her find strength, endurance and her mental power. ____________________________________________________________________________ If you or someone that you know is in an abusive situation and is seeking help, there are always resources available to help. National Domestic Violence Hotline (https://www.thehotline.org/): 1-800-799-7233 Resources for Victims & Survivors by State (https://www.thehotline.org/resources/victims-and-survivors/) National Coalition Against Domestic Violence (https://ncadv.org/) (NCADV) National Crisis Organizations, Assistance, and Resources for Survivors (https://ncadv.org/resources) Many local communities have shelters and assistance for people experiencing domestic abuse. If you are unable to search for these resources yourself due to fear of being observed by your abuser, you can work through different organizations in your community (like Daphne found help at the local firehouse) or with representatives from the national resources listed above. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy (https://acast.com/privacy) for more information.

17. 

    23 Jul 2019

    Episode 3: Black Mom’s Matter

    Uninhibited Podcast Shownotes Episode 3: Second part of Erica’s journey of pregnancy, loss, and healing. Welcome to Uninhibited, a podcast with the mission to discuss taboo, multicultural, multi-generational, and multi-layered topics that matter to women. Our host, Dr. Makunda Abdul Mbacke, is an Ivy-League trained OBGYN, practicing medicine in rural America. She is a mother, career professional, part of Generation X, and so much more. --- 00:55 - Dr. Makunda is back this week to finish a two-part interview with Ericka Turnipseed, a writer and educator who lives with her family in D.C. This two-part podcast explores issues around the high rates of maternal morbidity and mortality in the black community. Ericka shares her story about her experience and how her life has changed. 2:00 - Ericka describes waking up after her emergency C-section at 24 weeks into her pregnancy, and the uncertainty of the whole situation she was in. She was suffering from preeclampsia and Hellp Syndrome, woke up with an allergic reaction to one of the medications, was recovering from surgery, and also didn’t know if her daughter had survived after surgery. 3:30 - Ericka shares a turning moment after surgery when she met her night nurse and she could finally relay the pain she felt because she hadn’t yet been able to see her daughter, Grace. The nurse offered to take Ericka to the NICU on her break to see Grace, who was barely even one pound at the time. The joy of seeing her daughter was also mixed with Ericka’s great concern for her premature and sick child, and the severe condition of her own health. 7:05 - Ericka describes how her unique medical condition and the mystery around it made her feel like a curiosity for the medical staff, rather than a patient with a life and a story. Thankfully, Ericka had a friend in the medical field who helped advocate for her and remind others that she is a person experiencing a crisis, rather than a science experiment. 11:25 - “This is for all the sisters, all the women out there that maybe are feeling afraid of using their voice, but really in the end, that’s all we have. If we have to scream, then we scream, and if we can use polite language, then we use polite language. But using your voice is really a lot of times the only power you have.” - Dr. Makunda 14:16 - Ericka talks about how she had to advocate for Grace and had to push to gain information and understanding about her situation, even while Ericka was still recovering. Grace lived for four days after her birth, and on her last day of life, Ericka could tell that her child was declining. After consulting with the resident caring for Grace, Ericka noticed that the answers she was receiving were intentionally vague, despite her being very direct and was asking for the truth. 17:53 - Dr. Makunda speaks about situations like this from a medical point of view, which can be made so complex by medical mysteries and emotional responses. In some circumstances, it can be that the medical professionals aren’t entirely sure what the issue it; with some patients and their families, they will push to try everything to save their loved one, even if that may not be the most effective decision. 22:50 - Ericka describes what she did to be the best mother to Grace during her daughter’s last moments - she had tremendous help and support from the NICU nurses to arrange for Ericka and her husband to hold Grace as she passed. However, Ericka notes now that the NICU does not have the space or comforts needed for families going through the final moments and death of their child. For example, at one point during her time with Grace, their privacy was interrupted by someone unaware of their situation. Deaths in the NICU aren’t uncommon, and the fact that the unit is not set up to comfortably accommodate the transition into death should be changed. 28:07 - After Grace passed, the nurses put together a small memory box: Grace’s newborn hat, her armband, other things that she had accumulated in her short life and long stay in the NICU. Ericka stayed in the hospital for another three days after Grace’s passing, leaving her to handle the arrangements and questions and grief of death while still recovering herself. She even had to fight to get Grace’s birth certificate. 33:08 - Dr. Makunda asks Ericka to describe her path of emotional and physical recovery after Grace’s death. Ericka describes that grief is an ugly road and it took her awhile to come to terms with the fact that the complications of her pregnancy were not her fault. Ericka and her family had a funeral for Grace to celebrate her life and the meaning she held; they mourned the way Ericka had become a mother, together. However, there were people who didn’t understand what the loss of a child meant - that Grace hadn’t lived long enough for Ericka to form a bond, that she could always have another, as if Grace were replaceable. 36:37 - “As soon as you see those two lines, you make plans.” - Dr. Makunda 41:50 - Ericka shares some of the difficulties she faced in society while navigating her grief for Grace. Often, people’s efforts to be comforting were actually more cutting. 50:00 Ericka discusses the process that helped her with her grief - mostly, talking with other women. She connected with her grandmother, who had also lost children, and realized that there were so many experiences that other women had that nobody shared. Through these connections, Ericka found that “the blessing is bigger than the pain.” Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy (https://acast.com/privacy) for more information.

18. 

    23 Jul 2019

    Episode 2: Black Mom’s Matter!

    Uninhibited Podcast Shownote Episode 2: Black Mom’s Matter! Welcome to Uninhibited, a podcast with the mission to discuss taboo, multicultural, multi-generational, and multi-layered topics that matter to women. Our host, Dr. Makunda Abdul Mbacke, is an Ivy-League trained OBGYN, practicing medicine in rural America. She is a mother, career professional, part of Generation X, and so much more. --- 1:00 - Dr. Makunda introduces us to this week’s guest, Ericka Turnipseed, and gives some background on their topic of discussion: the high rates of maternal deaths - both during pregnancy and delivery - that is disproportionately impacting black women. 3:13 - Ericka describes her own experience with her first pregnancy, where she didn’t feel heard or cared for at her 22-week checkup meeting when her primary OBGYN was unavailable. There were a few concerns that Ericka expressed during her appointment, but she was told to go home and wasn’t seen by a doctor. 11:07 - A few days after that appointment, Ericka felt unwell at work and decided to leave, experiencing high levels of pain on her trip home. On arriving at the emergency room, Ericka was in intense pain and was seen by ER doctors on the labor and delivery floor, who couldn’t find a reason for her pain, but suspected preeclampsia. 14:50 - Dr. Makunda explains that even though Ericka’s situation was medically rare, these types of issues in providing effective prenatal care to black women isn’t just a hospital or area problem - it’s a national problem. 16:15 - Ericka saw a lack of confidence among the attending doctors caring for her, as this condition at barely 24 weeks into the pregnancy was uncommon. As soon as Ericka’s primary OBGYN arrived, they went through more tests to figure out exactly what was going on which led to a diagnosis of Hellp Syndrome. This syndrome affects blood platelets and liver enzymes. Ericka was admitted to the hospital, given the proper medications, and put on strict bedrest to prevent her from going into labor. 18:20 - Ericka tells about all the heartbreaking thoughts and feelings she was having at this time. She knew she was going to have a daughter, was discussing names and futures with her partner, and suddenly, her baby’s life was at risk because Ericka’s life was at risk. 20:40 - Ericka recalls being awoken that evening by her primary OBGYN to the news that they were going to have to move forward with her delivery because her condition was continuing to decline. The only option to save Ericka was to deliver her child. Her family rushed to be at her side through surgery and through this traumatic experience. 26:14 - On waking up from surgery, Ericka didn’t know where her daughter was or if she had survived the surgery. Thankfully, Ericka’s daughter, Grace, lived through the surgery, but it was uncertain how long she might live. Ericka was also experiencing complications and an allergic reaction after everything, so was moved to the ICU without seeing her child. 29:59 - “You said ‘I felt like my body had failed me’ and a lot of the dialogue about this maternal morbidity and mortality amongst African Americans is placing blame on the African American female body.” - Dr. Makunda. ------- For more information on Preeclampsia and Hellp Syndrome, check out these resources: Preeclampsia Foundation: Hellp Syndrome (https://www.preeclampsia.org/health-information/hellp-syndrome) March of Dimes: Hellp Syndrome (https://www.marchofdimes.org/complications/hellp-syndrome.aspx) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy (https://acast.com/privacy) for more information.

19. 

    13 Jul 2019

    Episode 1: Pilot

    Uninhibited Show Notes: Episode 1: Pilot Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy (https://acast.com/privacy) for more information.

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Apple Podcasts (US)

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