19 Oct 2026
Boys Aren't Broken | UnMuted Love Ep.108
Somewhere between learning to tie their shoes and learning to drive, nearly half of adolescent boys master the art of disappearing while standing right in front of you—adhering to unwritten rules like hiding fear and avoiding tears just to survive the school hallways. This week, I sit down for a lively conversation with Adam McCormick, MSW, PhD, who has spent over 25 years working with boys in foster care, juvenile justice, and community programs. Drawing from his own childhood with an alcoholic father and his transformative experience at age 22 as a live-in foster caregiver, Adam unpacks how survival strategies like shutting down, swaggering, or grunting aren't signs of a broken boy, but rather brilliant nervous system adaptations to pain and shame.
In this powerful episode, we explore what a house full of adolescent boys taught Adam about his own boyhood, how unwritten societal rules force kids to choose belonging over their true selves, and the heavy toll this lifelong disconnection takes on a man's future health, marriage, and friendships. We dig into who is really teaching these lessons to young boys and examine his core belief that all behavior is communication. If you are parenting a child who learned early that adults weren't safe, pull up a chair; this conversation will permanently change how you hear a slammed door. Be sure to share this episode with another parent and leave a rating and review to help more families find Unmuted Love.
▶️ Watch the video version here → https://youtu.be/mYeXV9_nZLE
📖 Check out Adam's book, Healing the Helping Professional → https://naswpress.org/product/healing-the-helping-professional/
🌐 Find Adam on his website → https://www.stedwards.edu/directory/sociology-social-work/adam-mccormick
About Adam:
Adam McCormick, MSW, PhD, is a Professor of Social Work at St. Edward's University in Austin, a nationally recognized speaker, and the author of LGBTQ Youth in Foster Care. After 25+ years, he still facilitates trauma and masculinity groups with adolescent boys, which tells you everything about where his heart lives.
His upcoming trade book digs into the hidden emotional costs of boyhood and how the boys we raise become the men they are (release date pending).
From Ce Eshelman:
Are you searching for a community of parents who will get you; who offer an attentive ear and open arms in the worst of times; who give you a standing ovation for the monumentally big "small steps" forward you make with your child? It is so painful to walk the jagged trail of this parenting journey alone and no one is ever alone in the Love Matters Parenting Society Therapeutic Parent Program. You will feel seen, understood, and actually deeply cared for. We know it as "love." The Society is a virtual program for parents of children who experienced trauma and others who support them or work with them professionally. You don't have to wait a minute longer. We are right here waiting for YOU!
Access Free Resources!
✨ The VIP Parent Program has been discontinued, but you can still access all the handouts and more free resources at our Free Resources Page! (https://www.lovemattersparenting.com/free-materials)
Additional Resources:
📖 Get your copy of Ce's new book: 20 Things Children from Difficult Beginnings Wish Friends and Family Knew (https://www.amazon.com/Things-Children-Difficult-Beginnings-Friends/dp/B0FM7WSNC6)
📖 Get your copy of Drowning with My Hair On Fire: Insanity Relief for Adoptive Parents (https://www.amazon.com/Drowning-My-Hair-Fire-Insanity/dp/1478770961/ref=sr_1_1?crid=1KW0Y1P6Z5GHE&keywords=drowning+with+my+hair+on+fire&psr=EY17&qid=1701139958&s=cyber-monday&sprefix=drowning+with+my+hair+on+fire%2Ccyber-monday%2C149&sr=1-1)
▶️ Watch Ce's YouTube Videos: https://www.youtube.com/@CeEshelman (https://www.youtube.com/@LoveMattersParenting)
🧐 Subscribe to the blog: https://www.lovemattersparenting.com/blog (https://www.lovemattersparenting.com/blog/)
🔍 Check out my websites: LoveMattersParenting.com (https://www.lovemattersparenting.com/) and AttachPlace.com (https://AttachPlace.com)
📣 Hear the Success Stories: LoveMattersParenting.com/testimonials (https://lovemattersparenting.com/testimonials)
👉 Find Ce on Social Media:
🔹 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/lovemattersparenting (https://www.instagram.com/lovemattersparenting)
🔹 Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/lovemattersparenting (https://www.facebook.com/lovemattersparenting.com)
Unmuted Love is a free podcast for parents of children from difficult beginnings of adoption and abuse trauma. Ce is an adoptive mom of two, step-mom of two, and an Attachment and Trauma Specialist. The Unmuted Love Podcast is part of Love Matters Parenting Society (https://www.lovemattersparenting.com) and The Attach Place Center for Strengthening Relationships, LLC (http://www.attachplace.com/). For more information about joining this vibrant community of parents, https://www.lovemattersparenting.com/lmps1 (https://www.lovemattersparenting.com/lmps1).
🎧 Follow us on your favorite podcast platform so you never miss an episode! (http:www.unmutedlove.com)
