Am I The Trauma? — A Nervous System Diary is me thinking out loud about my patterns, my body, and the moments I realise I’m not “too much” — just triggered.
If you’ve ever asked, “Is it me?” — you’re in the right place.
Socials: Jo_Oswin
www.ginkgominds.com
My First Trauma - R*pe, Abuse & Grooming Inside The Family
This is not an easy episode. And it’s not meant to be.
In this first entry of Am I the Trauma?, I’m speaking about my earliest experiences with abuse… what it looked like, how it hid inside something that was supposed to be safe, and how grooming doesn’t announce itself — it slowly rewrites your reality until you don’t even have language for what’s happening.
We talk about family. Silence. Confusion. The moments your body knew before your mind did.
And what it means to grow up carrying something you were never meant to hold.
This isn’t just a story… it’s a starting point. Because trauma doesn’t end where it happened — it shows up in your relationships, your desire, your boundaries, your sense of self.
If you’ve ever questioned your own memory, your reactions, or why your body responds the way it does… this episode is for you.
Take your time with this one.
—
Find more of my work, courses, and upcoming workshops:
🌐 www.ginkgominds.com
Follow me for daily truths, nervous system education, and the kind of conversations most people avoid:
Instagram: @jo.oswin
TikTok: @jo.oswin
Join the Aftercare Club (deeper conversations, live sessions, and community):
💌 Patreon: patreon.com/jooswin
29 Mar 2026
Nervous, Sexy, Damaged - A soft launch into my psychological damage
Am I The Trauma? is a podcast about trauma, survival, sex, shame, patterns, and all the weird little ways the nervous system keeps the score long after the plot should’ve ended.
I’m a trauma-informed therapist, writer, and, frankly, a very qualified narrator of my own chaos. In this podcast, I talk through the things that happened to me... honestly, intelligently, and without pretending trauma always looks tragic and easy to recognise. Sometimes it looks hot. Sometimes it looks high-functioning. Sometimes it looks like you being “fine” for ten years.
This is part personal story, part psychological deep dive, part public life experiment.
Basically... I’m telling the truth out loud and seeing what it unlocks in other people.
xx Josi
Socials: @jo_oswin
www.ginkgominds.com
11 Mar 2026
Why You Can’t Look Them in the Eyes
If eye contact during sex makes you flinch or shut down—this is for you.
Avoidant attachment meets intimacy, and the body says: not safe.
Reflection prompt:
What happens in me when someone really sees me?
Socials: Jo_Oswin
www.ginkgominds.com
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