This podcast is the consequence of my pensive soliloquy, an unrelenting barrage of diverse perspectives, all competing for the same mindscape. My own opinions amalgamated with unquoted book excerpts, online articles, newsletters et al.
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I hope listening to my work makes you secure serenity, understand yourself better and lead a more meaningful life.
It’s isn’t a criterion we are foolish enough apply to any other area of our lives. If we enjoy a book, we don’t expect that we’ll have to keep reading it ad infinitum. If we enjoy a joke, we don’t think we should be made to hear it again and again. We may dearly love a job, but we don’t for that matter believe that we’ll have to stay there till the end. We can adore a house, and still need – at a certain stage – to move elsewhere.
Yet this enlightened, commonsense acceptance of term limits seems not to penetrate the one area where its absence can prove especially lacerating: the romantic sphere. Here, pointlessly and needlessly, we labor under an invisible societal edict dictating that things must last until we expire or else cannot have had a jot of value to begin with....
4 Jul 2024
Dangers of Oversharing
We hear so much about the difficulties caused by those who cannot be intimate, who seem incapable of disclosing anything of what they genuinely feel, it can take time to register the opposite but no less grave problem: those who cannot keep enough of themselves to themselves, those whose hunger for closeness overwhelms their concern for their own safety, those who will, in a poignant bid to hold others’ attention, lay out – within minutes of a new encounter – secrets that they would have been wiser to take to the grave.
This isn’t to deny the fun that oversharers can bring to social life. These won’t be the types talking about the economic contraction or where they last went on holiday. Contact with other humans should be about getting to the marrow of things, they believe, which is why we will quickly get to hear about their ex’s sexual difficulty, the vicious row they had about their mother’s will, exactly how much they earn, the troubles they have with their digestion, their favourite bedroom position and the nature of an early childhood trauma...
28 Jun 2024
Time Heals Everything (almost)
The proverb ‘Time Heals Everything’ has been very much embraced by society. The thinking behind it is that over time all wounds gradually become less painful. Eventually, if the wound is not as severe — or your life has been rather adventurous — you will be able to think about the tragic or traumatic event without a pang of pain.
Therefore, it comes as no surprise that many often use this turn of phrase ‘time heals everything’ to respond to someone who is going through a difficult period. In fact, I am sure you, at some point, has either said it to a loved one in a crisis or being offered it as a relief to your own bad experience.
Right now, we can look back on a really tough period we had endured in the past. We no longer feel the pain seeping into our heart and splashing out in tears. Conversely, we may be a little grateful that we are not going through such hardship currently.
This is the privilege the shift of time offers us.
The core issue behind the thinking of ‘time heals everything’ is that the wisdom only becomes fruitful or even remotely useful when the time has actually elapsed.
Finally, your eyes have stopped gushing out tears for months on end. Six years later, you can enjoy a tear-free day, but may have visible ruts on your face where continuous water was falling...
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