Hot Messes, Big Visions

About Hot Messes, Big Visions

Hot Messes, Big Visions is a podcast for the parents who are building something - a business, a career, a family, a village - while still cleaning up snack crumbs and surviving on less than four hours sleep.Hosted by Nikki Pak and Sophia Phieros, co-founders of The Village Co., each episode is an honest, unfiltered conversation about modern parenthood, identity, work, and what it actually feels like to build something real inside a real life. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy (https://acast.com/privacy) for more information.

Publisher

Nikki Pak, Sophia Phieros

Category

business · business · kids & family

Language

en

Explicit

No

First episode

31 Jul 2025

Latest episode

20 Jul 2026

Latest episodes

19 episodes in the feed.

1. 

   20 Jul 2026

   EP 019: F*ck Up Your Kids with Grace & Humour, with Jacqlin Richards

   We finally got Jacqlin Richards on the pod and she did not hold back. Parenting Alchemist. Award-winning educator. Author of the best book title we have ever heard: F*ck Up Your Kids with Grace & Humour. Jacqlin used to be the fun police, the sugar police, the screen police. Blow-drying her hair before a run. Holding it all together while falling apart behind closed doors. Now she actually enjoys her kids, and in this episode she tells us exactly what changed. We talk about: ✨ the perfection trap and why it keeps mums isolated ✨ the love languages exercise her whole family did (steal this one) ✨ why losing your sh*t isn't the problem, the repair is what counts ✨ screens, fear, and getting your kids' buy-in instead of policing them Her book hits Amazon on 28 July and there are a handful of signed pre-order copies left. Pre-order also gets you free access to her live workshop series. Link in bio, or head to jacqlinrichards.com/preorder. Listen wherever you get your podcasts. Then share it with your village 💛 @jacqlinrichards #HotMessesBigVisions #ParentingPodcast #NZPodcast #RealParenting #MumLife #TheVillageCo Find your village at: TheVillageCo.nz (https://TheVillageCo.nz) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy (https://acast.com/privacy) for more information.

2. 

   23 Jun 2026

   Nicole Retter: Burnout Canaries, Supermum Lies and Building PAM From a Panic Attack

   This week we're joined by Nicole Retter, founder of PAM (Personal Admin Manager), one of New Zealand's top-ranked apps and a product built entirely from lived chaos. Nicole takes us right back to the origin story: COVID, a husband who couldn't use either arm, two preschoolers, a piece of 4x2 wood wedged against a bedroom door, a panic attack, and then a concussion that gave her 12 months on the couch to figure out what she actually wanted to build. In this episode we talk about: The mental load that never actually ends (it just changes shape at every life stage) What "supermum" really means, and why Nicole thinks it's the most insidious thing ever invented Burnout canaries, recognising your personal early warning signs before you hit the wall Why she deliberately limits what AI does inside PAM, and why throwing an LLM at a problem is not a strategy The overlap between mum mode and founder mode, and what snapping at your kids at the kitchen bench taught her about boundaries Authentic pitching vs scripted presentations, and why cookie-cutter kills personality Plus Nicole's actual messy moment of the week: a logistical nightmare involving swimming pools, an Uber, a scooter, a closed Butterfly Creek, and a very sugar-hyped eight-year-old. Find your village at: TheVillageCo.nz (https://TheVillageCo.nz) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy (https://acast.com/privacy) for more information.

3. 

   14 May 2026

   Would You Know What To Do? Gagging, Choking, and the 2am Your Baby Turns Blue

   What would you actually do if your baby choked right now? In this episode, we sit down with Charlotte from And Breathe First Aid, a paediatric ICU nurse with over a decade of experience and the founder of NZ's only parent-specific first aid education. We talk about the gap between knowing first aid and actually being able to act in a crisis, why choking is less common than you think (and what to do when it does happen), and the one stat about CPR that stopped us both in our tracks. We cover: The difference between gagging and choking, and the one question to ask yourself Why baby CPR is nothing like what you learned in a workplace course Febrile seizures: what they are, how common they are, and why no one talks about it How to stay calm when it's your own child The free Baby CPR mini course you can do right now from your couch Charlotte also shares the story of her own daughter going blue at 2am, which is equal parts terrifying and reassuring. Free Baby CPR Mini Course: https://www.andbreathefirstaid.co.nz/pages/baby-cpr-mini-course (https://www.andbreathefirstaid.co.nz/pages/baby-cpr-mini-course) Find your village at: TheVillageCo.nz (https://TheVillageCo.nz) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy (https://acast.com/privacy) for more information.

4. 

   8 May 2026

   The Messy Middle

   Nobody talks about the bit in between. Not the exciting launch, not the "we made it" moment. Just the long, unglamorous stretch where you're building something real while running on broken sleep and blind faith. That's where Nikki and Sophia are right now, and this episode they're not pretending otherwise. From midnight wake-ups and toddlers who insist on driving the car, to turning 41 wondering if you have your life together, to that very specific startup feeling of being so close and so far at the same time, this one's for anyone in the thick of it. Because parenting and building a business? Turns out they're not that different. It's the same stubbornness, the same "I can't quit now," the same slow, hard, beautiful progress you almost miss while you're living it. If you've been waiting for someone to say "same" instead of "here's how I scaled to seven figures by Thursday," pull up a seat. In this episode: Messy moments: poster frights, car-seat standoffs, and the 3am guilt spiral Why you never hear about the middle of the story Turning 41 mid-startup and questioning everything (briefly) "This too shall pass" and why we actually believe it Building The Village Co., their fifth baby Find your village at: TheVillageCo.nz (https://TheVillageCo.nz) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy (https://acast.com/privacy) for more information.

5. 

   1 May 2026

   She Built an App on Maternity Leave. Then Quit Her Job. Then Kept Going.

   Renata Wiles is the founder of ROAM with Kids, an app that helps NZ parents find places to go with their kids, complete with parent reviews, age-based filters, and local events. What started as a dodgy Google map she built to stop answering the same DMs is now live across New Zealand and just landed in Brisbane. In this episode, Renata gets refreshingly honest about what building a business with small kids actually looks like. We're talking one-handed pram-pushing while replying to emails, working until 1am for almost a year, and sitting with a resignation email in her drafts for three months before she finally hit send. We also talk about the thing nobody says out loud: that "flexible working" doesn't really exist for parents. That the juggle is real. That this week might just be a write-off. And that the only way through is building your own village. Big conversation. Lots of laughs. A genuinely messy moment at the end. New episodes drop every week. Follow wherever you listen, and find us at thevillageco.nz. Find your village at: TheVillageCo.nz (https://TheVillageCo.nz) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy (https://acast.com/privacy) for more information.

6. 

   23 Apr 2026

   EP 014: We Nearly Broke.....Then Built This

   This week nearly broke us. Between daycare chaos, burnout, building a business with two young kids, and trying to hold it all together… something had to change. In this episode, we’re getting real about: the messy moment that pushed us to the edge the reality of daycare (and why it’s not working for so many families) taking space, burnout, and what happens when you finally stop why we rebuilt everything and launched The Village Co. 2.0 This isn’t a polished business story. It’s the messy middle, the part no one talks about. And it’s exactly where this next chapter starts. If you’re building something, raising kids, or just trying to keep your head above water… this one’s for you. Follow & Subscribe New episodes dropping as we bring on women building big things (without pretending they have it all together). About Us We’re Nikki & Soph, the founders behind The Village Co.a platform rethinking how families find support. Built in the chaos of real life, not boardrooms. Connect with us Instagram: @VillageBabysitting (https://facebook.com/VillageBabysitting) Facebook: @VillageBabysitting (https://facebook.com/VillageBabysitting) TikTok: @VillageBabysitting (https://tiktok.com/@VillageBabysitting) Website: TheVillageCo.nz (https://TheVillageCo.nz) Find your village at: TheVillageCo.nz (https://TheVillageCo.nz) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy (https://acast.com/privacy) for more information.

7. 

   4 Mar 2026

   EP 013: The Rest We Never Get: Why mums can't switch off and what to do about it

   This week we're getting real about the one thing every mum talks about needing but almost never actually gets: rest. We kick off with a stat that'll make you laugh (and cry) — the average mum works the equivalent of 2.5 full-time jobs when you combine paid work, childcare, and household labour. Oh, and the weekend? Sold to us as rest. TGIF indeed. From white-knuckling a weekend full of activities and face paint in the shed, to the concept of a 'switch-off moment' (hint: it used to happen at daycare drop-off), we unpack the reality of modern motherhood — the mental load, the mum guilt, the constant spinning of plates — with humour, honesty, and zero judgement. We also ask the uncomfortable question: when was the last time you genuinely rested? The answer might surprise you (Fiji, 2021, before the second kid arrived). In This Episode [00:00]  The 2.5 jobs stat — why weekends don't count as rest [02:00]  Weekend activities and the reality behind 'making memories' [03:47]  Managing kids' boredom without losing your mind [05:00]  Planning excursions in a busy city — chicken nuggets in the air fryer FTW [07:34]  Switch-off moments: what happened to just… not thinking? [09:00]  The challenge of rest — binge-watching Netflix used to be a valid activity [11:59]  The trend of mums actually taking time for themselves (gasp) [13:28]  Mum guilt vs. dad guilt — spoiler: not the same thing [15:14]  The mental load and calendar management — spinning plates edition [17:57]  When was the last time you genuinely rested? [20:00]  Messy moments, face paint, and kids in the shed [23:00]  Kids' creative play — beautiful chaos [25:00]  Language, boundaries, and honest parenting conversations [27:00]  The importance of rest — what the research actually says [28:30]  Reflecting on balance and closing thoughts Find your village at: TheVillageCo.nz (https://TheVillageCo.nz) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy (https://acast.com/privacy) for more information.

8. 

   20 Feb 2026

   EP 012: Camping With Preschoolers: Chaos, Core Memories & Why We Always Say “Let’s Do It Again

   Camping with preschoolers is not for the faint-hearted. In this episode, we unpack the beautiful chaos of family camping trips, the sleep deprivation, emotional meltdowns (from kids and adults), post-surgery recovery, and the strange parenting phenomenon where you swear never again… only to start planning the next trip days later. We share honest reflections on marriage under pressure, parenting through exhaustion, and why humour is sometimes the only survival tool. Along the way, we talk about building a brand in the middle of real life, leaning on community support, and collaborating with people who truly understand the parenting experience. It’s raw, funny, relatable and a reminder that the messiest moments often become the memories we treasure most. Hot messes. Big visions. And muddy shoes. Key Takeaways • Camping can seriously test your patience (and your marriage). • Making memories with your kids is hard work — but deeply rewarding. • Parenting post-surgery adds a whole new level of challenge. • Sleep deprivation is basically a parenting rite of passage. • Community support matters more than we realise. • Humour helps everything. • Building a brand takes collaboration and understanding. • Your parenting perspective evolves over time. • Kids absolutely copy their siblings (for better or worse). • Every chaotic moment is still a learning moment. Find your village at: TheVillageCo.nz (https://TheVillageCo.nz) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy (https://acast.com/privacy) for more information.

9. 

   28 Jan 2026

   EP 011: What No One Tells You About Parenthood | Hormones, Hair Loss & Losing Motivation

   No one warns you that parenthood can change your body, your energy, and even your motivation — and that it’s not because you’re lazy, failing, or “not coping well enough.” In this episode of Hot Messes, Big Visions, Nikki and Sophia talk honestly about the parts of parenthood that rarely get said out loud: hair loss, hormone shifts, emotional exhaustion, and the quiet loss of motivation so many parents experience after having kids. This isn’t about fixing yourself. It’s about understanding what’s actually happening — and realising you’re not alone. • Why hair loss after kids is more common than we admit • How hormones impact motivation, mood, and energy • Why “rest” doesn’t always fix exhaustion • The guilt parents carry for not bouncing back • Why this isn’t a personal failure — it’s a support gap • How naming the reality can be the first relief If you’ve ever thought “Why am I still so tired?” or “What’s wrong with me?” — this episode is for you. 🎧 New episodes every week 💛 Share this with a parent who needs to hear it In this episode, we talk about: Find your village at: TheVillageCo.nz (https://TheVillageCo.nz) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy (https://acast.com/privacy) for more information.

10. 

    22 Jan 2026

    EP 010: Why Parents With Childcare Are Still Exhausted | Mental Load & Burnout

    But you have childcare… why are you still tired?” We got asked this recently and honestly, it stopped us in our tracks. In this episode of Hot Messes, Big Visions, we unpack why having childcare doesn’t magically make parenting easy, why so many parents still feel exhausted even with support, and how modern parenting has quietly turned tiredness into a personal failure. Spoiler: it’s not. We talk about: Why childcare doesn’t cancel mental load (or emotional labour) The pressure of mini mum “girl gangs” and comparison culture Why parents are still everything to everyone — even after school and daycare drop-off How we turn any spare capacity into more responsibility (hello degrees, side hustles, and “I’ll just do one more thing”) And why being tired doesn’t mean you’re doing parenting wrong — it means you’re carrying a lot This isn’t a clapback. It’s a very real, very honest chat between friends, the kind where you laugh, nod, and think oh thank god it’s not just me. If you’re tired even with help, you’re not failing. Parenting doesn’t get easy when you get support, it gets honest. Find your village at: TheVillageCo.nz (https://TheVillageCo.nz) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy (https://acast.com/privacy) for more information.

11. 

    8 Jan 2026

    EP 009: “What Holiday?” Parenting Through Christmas & Total Exhaustion

    Christmas is often painted as a time to slow down and soak it all in — but for many parents, it can feel anything but restful. In this episode of Hot Messes Big Visions, Nikki and Soph reflect on the reality of parenting through the holiday season. From managing Christmas expectations and cultural traditions to hosting, working, and navigating the chaos that comes with kids at home, this conversation explores why the holidays can feel so overwhelming. We talk honestly about: the pressure to create the “perfect” Christmas expectations vs reality during the holidays cultural differences in how Christmas is celebrated parenting exhaustion and holiday burnout balancing work and family life the gaps in childcare and support for parents As we look ahead to the year to come, we also share what we’re excited about, what we’re planning for the platform, and how we hope to better support parents moving forward. If Christmas left you feeling tired, overstimulated, or quietly thinking “was that even a holiday?” — you’re not alone. This episode is a reminder that you don’t have to do it all, and that parenting through the holidays is hard for so many families. Chapters 00:00 Welcome & reflecting on the holidays 02:40 Christmas expectations vs reality 05:14 Cultural Christmas celebrations 08:36 Holiday exhaustion with kids 14:07 Finding routine after the holidays 19:13 Parenting, work & work-life balance 23:34 Evolving childcare needs 25:54 Looking ahead to what’s next Hot Messes Big Visions is a podcast about parenting, identity, work, and modern family life — told honestly, without pressure to have it all together. Find your village at: TheVillageCo.nz (https://TheVillageCo.nz) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy (https://acast.com/privacy) for more information.

12. 

    18 Dec 2025

    EP 008: December Burnout Is Real | Parenting, Pressure & End-of-Year Exhaustion

    In this lively conversation, Nikki and Soph discuss the chaos and challenges of December, particularly around Christmas. They share personal anecdotes about holiday preparations, the stress of managing children's expectations, and the realities of parenting during the festive season. The conversation touches on the pressures of gift-giving, the complexities of family traditions, and the humorous yet relatable meltdowns that occur in the lead-up to Christmas. Ultimately, they reflect on the importance of keeping things low-key and enjoying the magic of the season without overwhelming themselves. Chapters 00:00 December Dilemmas: The Holiday Hustle 05:48 Advent Adventures: The Chaos of Christmas Countdown 12:03 Meltdowns and Big Emotions: Navigating Parenting Challenges 18:08 Reflections on Parenting: Lessons Learned and Shared Experiences 20:08 The Pressure of Parenting in Public 23:34 The Christmas Conundrum: Expectations vs. Reality 26:54 Balancing Gift-Giving and Financial Realities 29:19 The Overwhelm of Holiday Preparations 33:57 Wrapping Up the Year: Reflections and Future Plans Find your village at: TheVillageCo.nz (https://TheVillageCo.nz) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy (https://acast.com/privacy) for more information.

13. 

    28 Nov 2025

    EP 007: Why School Holidays Are Harder Than You Expect | Summer Parenting Burnout

    In the latest episode of our podcast, we dive deep into the ups and downs of trying to maintain a healthy lifestyle while juggling the joys of life. Join us as we explore the comedic yet relatable struggles of exercise, indulgence, and the irresistible pull of the beach during the summer. Discussing RNZ article: How Grandparents feel being the go-to childcare: https://www.rnz.co.nz/life/relationships/family/how-grandparents-feel-about-being-the-go-to-childcare Find your village at: TheVillageCo.nz (https://TheVillageCo.nz) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy (https://acast.com/privacy) for more information.

14. 

    12 Nov 2025

    EP 006: Finding Childcare Without a Village | The Stress, Guilt & Reality for Parents

    In this episode of Hot Messes Big Visions, hosts Nikki and Sophia share their experiences as parents navigating the chaos of family life. They discuss their messiest moments, the importance of community support, and the challenges of finding reliable childcare. The conversation touches on self-care, body image, and the realities of parenting, including bedwetting and discipline strategies. Throughout the episode, they emphasize the need for kindness towards oneself and the value of sharing parenting experiences with others. Find your village at: TheVillageCo.nz (https://TheVillageCo.nz) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy (https://acast.com/privacy) for more information.

15. 

    29 Oct 2025

    EP 005: The Identity Shift After Becoming a Mum | Who You Are vs Who You Were

    In this conversation, Nikki & Soph discuss the challenges of parenting, including the impact of daylight savings on their energy levels, Nikki's decision to quit a job for family commitments, and the ongoing identity crisis that comes with motherhood. They share personal experiences of postpartum struggles, the difficulty of balancing exercise with parenting, and humorous messy moments, such as dealing with an ant infestation and the challenges of keeping a clean home. The conversation highlights the complexities of modern parenting and the shared experiences that come with it. Takeaways Daylight savings can significantly affect energy levels. Quitting a job can be a difficult yet necessary decision for family. Parenting often leads to an identity crisis as roles shift. Postpartum life can bring unexpected challenges and changes. Finding time for exercise is tough when balancing parenting and work. Messy moments are a common part of family life. It's important to share parenting struggles with others. Maintaining a clean home can be overwhelming with young children. Food rules in the house can be hard to enforce with kids. Parenting is a journey filled with ups and downs. Chapters 00:00 Surviving the Week: Daylight Savings and Fatigue 05:11 The Transformation: Life Changes After Kids 12:19 Messy Moments: Ant Infestations and Parenting Chaos Find your village at: TheVillageCo.nz (https://TheVillageCo.nz) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy (https://acast.com/privacy) for more information.

16. 

    14 Oct 2025

    EP 004: Solo Parenting Is Emotionally Exhausting | Sleep Deprivation, Control & Burnout

    In this conversation, the hosts discuss the challenges of solo parenting, the emotional toll it takes, and the practical aspects of managing children's toys and sleep routines. They share personal anecdotes about transitioning to bunk beds, the farewell of cube storage, and the ongoing struggles with sleep training. The conversation highlights the need for control in chaotic parenting situations and the emotional meltdowns that can arise from the pressures of parenting. Takeaways Solo parenting can be incredibly challenging and isolating. Cube storage provided a sense of organization that was hard to let go of. Transitioning to bunk beds can lead to unexpected challenges. Sleep training is a continuous journey with ups and downs. Emotional meltdowns often occur when control feels lost. Children's independence can lead to chaos and mess. Finding a balance between parenting and personal time is crucial. Communication with partners about parenting roles is essential. The need for emotional outlets is important for parents. Parenting requires flexibility and adaptability to changing circumstances. Chapters 00:00 Solo Parenting Challenges 06:01 The Transition to Bunk Beds 11:39 Sleep Training Struggles 19:19 The Quest for Control 26:19 Emotional Meltdowns and Breakdowns Find your village at: TheVillageCo.nz (https://TheVillageCo.nz) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy (https://acast.com/privacy) for more information.

17. 

    8 Oct 2025

    EP 003: Why Parenting Was Never Meant to Be Done Alone

    In this episode of Hot Messes, Big Visions, hosts Nikki and Sophia share their experiences as parents and entrepreneurs, discussing the chaos of balancing work and family life. They delve into the messy moments of parenting, the guilt associated with taking time off, and the importance of building a supportive community. The conversation highlights the challenges of postpartum life, the evolution of parenting perspectives, and the necessity of self-care for parents. Through their candid stories, they emphasise that parenting is a journey filled with ups and downs, and it's okay to seek help and support along the way. Find your village at: TheVillageCo.nz (https://TheVillageCo.nz) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy (https://acast.com/privacy) for more information.

18. 

    10 Sept 2025

    EP 002: Losing Yourself After Kids: Identity, Sleep Deprivation & Motherhood

    In this episode, Nikki & Soph discuss their experiences at a recent conference, emphasizing the importance of inclusivity for parents. They explore the challenges of balancing motherhood with personal identity, the realities of sleep deprivation, and the mental health struggles that come with parenting. The conversation is filled with humor and relatable messy moments, highlighting the ups and downs of raising children. Takeaways Inclusivity at conferences can attract a more diverse audience. Having childcare options at events can enhance participation. Motherhood often leads to a conflict between personal identity and parenting responsibilities. Sleep deprivation is a common struggle for parents, affecting mental clarity. Parenting is a journey filled with both love and challenges. Social media can create unrealistic expectations for mothers. It's normal to feel a loss of self after having children. Every parent has their own messy moments and struggles. The journey of parenting is ongoing and doesn't have a clear finish line. Humour is essential in navigating the chaos of family life. Chapters 00:00 Introduction and Conference Experience 05:16 The Role of Children in Conferences 09:16 Balancing Motherhood and Personal Identity 12:58 Postnatal Mental Health and Sleep Deprivation 17:51 The Challenges of Parenting and Expectations 22:10 Messy Moments and Parenting Realities 29:48 The Importance of Self-Care Find your village at: TheVillageCo.nz (https://TheVillageCo.nz) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy (https://acast.com/privacy) for more information.

19. 

    31 Jul 2025

    EP 001: Why Parenting Feels So Chaotic (And Why You’re Not Failing)

    Summary In this episode of Hot Messes Big Visions, hosts Nikki and Sophia share their chaotic parenting experiences, discussing the messiness of family life, the importance of community support, and the challenges of balancing personal identity with motherhood. They reflect on their own parenting journeys, the need for breaks, and the joy of building a supportive village for parents. Takeaways Building your dream doesn't need to be polished. It's okay to ask for help and take breaks. Parenting is a constant struggle that requires adaptation. Community support is essential for parents. Messy moments are a part of real life parenting. You don't need to have it together to be going somewhere. Finding balance as a parent is crucial. The village concept helps alleviate parenting pressures. Parenting can be both rewarding and challenging. You're not alone in your parenting journey. Sound Bites "It's okay to ask for help." "It's a constant struggle." "You're not alone." Chapters 00:00 Welcome to Hot Messes Big Visions 11:31 The Reality of Parenting 18:40 Building a Supportive Community 34:40 The Reality of Parenting 46:17 The Importance of Self-Care Find your village at: TheVillageCo.nz (https://TheVillageCo.nz) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy (https://acast.com/privacy) for more information.

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Spotify

5.0 / 5

6 ratings

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