It's Not That Deep

About It's Not That Deep

In each episode Adrienne Kirk, a Psychotherapist and Lucy Ranger (was Woods), a Mindfulness Specialist bring some lightness to often difficult subjects, helping to navigate through the messiness of life's challenges. With a real emphasis on how to move towards flourishing, It's Not That Deep, looks at what it really is to be human, and offers some tools and strategies that help to support our wellbeing. Find us at: www.adriennekirk.uk or www.presenceofmind.life Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy (https://acast.com/privacy) for more information.

Publisher

Adrienne Kirk and Lucy Ranger

Category

health & fitness · health & fitness · science

Language

en

Explicit

No

First episode

18 Jul 2022

Latest episode

20 Oct 2026

Latest episodes

114 episodes in the feed.

1. 

   20 Oct 2026

   Why do we find it hard to be present?

   In this episode we explore why being present feels so difficult, even when we know it helps. We look at how anxiety, depression, chronic pain, and social stress pull attention into the future or the past, and why mindfulness is less about forcing calm and more about training attention. Being present isn’t easy, because our default mode is mind wandering. We hope that this conversation is practical and compassionate, with examples from couples’ work, illness, grief, and everyday life. If you’ve ever felt like your mind is always elsewhere, this episode explains why and what to do about it. Key topics We unpack why being present can feel surprisingly hard, even for people who teach or practice mindfulness. Lucy shared a Harvard study finding that people reported not being present roughly 47.9% of the time, often because the mind is busy planning, worrying, or replaying the past. Adrienne described how being present disappears in conversation when she is trying to hold onto what she wants to say instead of listening fully. We discuss how anxiety pulls people into the future, depression pulls us into the past, and chronic illness or pain can keep our attention locked on what feels urgent. Lucy explains that being present does not mean focusing only on discomfort. It means having a wider awareness and the ability to choose where to place our attention. Adrienne gives examples from her work with couples, where people often rehearse their reply instead of hearing the other person, and describes a summarizing exercise that slows conflict down. We talk about anticipatory grief, especially when supporting someone with a terminal diagnosis, and how trying to manufacture “special memories” can get in the way of actually making them. Lucy uses the butterfly analogy to show that presence often comes through less effort, not more, and that chasing it can make it more elusive. We explore how modern life keeps us in ‘doing mode’, with social media, performance pressure, and constant self-evaluation replacing quieter forms of simply being. And we emphasise that presence is a practice, not a personality trait, and that it works best when time for it is intentionally protected. Find us at: www.adriennekirk.uk or www.presenceofmind.life Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy (https://acast.com/privacy) for more information.

2. 

   6 Oct 2026

   Why do we view our bodies and minds separately?

   In this episode, we unpack the old habit of treating body and mind as two different things, and why that split still shapes how we understand stress, anxiety, illness, and healing. We connect philosophy, neuroscience, and clinical practice to show how thoughts, emotions, and physical symptoms are constantly influencing each other. In this conversation, we explore how the nervous system, breathing, and body awareness can help people notice stress earlier and respond more skilfully. We also discuss why chronic stress can worsen conditions like IBS, psoriasis, fibromyalgia, and depression, and why quick fixes rarely address the full picture. We explore how, when we notice how the body is feeling then we can take steps to soothe our nervous system, to start to turn off the cascade of hormones that are the physical manifestations of our feelings. Key topics Lucy introduces the central question: why do we view our bodies and minds separately, and how did that idea emerge from religion, early medicine, and philosophy? Adrienne explains how the mind-body split is comforting for many people because it supports the idea that something in us continues beyond the body. We discuss how medicine reinforced the divide by treating the brain in two systems: neurology for the physical brain and psychiatry for the mental and emotional experience. Lucy brings in consciousness and neuroscience, noting that we still do not fully understand the brain or the relationship between thought, feeling, and bodily response. Adrienne uses animal examples, including cats, bats, chimpanzees, and bonobos, to show the role of awareness, planning, and language in human consciousness. We argue that human intelligence and brain development are evolutionary continuations, not proof that humans are fundamentally separate from the animal world. Lucy describes how thoughts can trigger stress chemistry, leading to physical symptoms like butterflies in the stomach, heart racing, and nausea. Adrienne shares how noticing body sensations can reveal rumination and catastrophising, and how one client’s lack of enjoyment was actually high-alert nervous system activation rather than depression alone. We explain how chronic stress can suppress digestion and reproduction, contributing to issues like IBS, fibromyalgia, autoimmune flare-ups, and psoriasis. We emphasize that healing often requires both medical treatment and nervous-system support, including therapy, mindfulness, breathing, and rest. Notable quotes “Feelings are physical.” “Present moment rules.” “We can start body first.” Find us at: www.adriennekirk.uk or www.presenceofmind.life Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy (https://acast.com/privacy) for more information.

3. 

   22 Sept 2026

   Why do we find it hard to just "let them"?

   Why do we find it hard to just ‘let them’? ‘Let them’ sounds simple until it lands in the middle of real life - being left out, ghosted, judged, or faced with someone whose behaviour crosses a line. In this episode, we unpack why this viral Mel Robbins idea is so compelling, and why it becomes much harder when feelings, values, and relationships are actually on the line. We examine down the tension between acceptance and self-protection, asking the question the shortcut never answers: what do you do when “just let them” could mean becoming a doormat, swallowing hurt, or letting a relationship drift without repair? We explore why we so often assume other people’s behaviour is about us, how quickly a tiny moment can spiral into FOMO, rejection, or a full-blown story in our heads, and why the first reaction is usually the least useful one. We also dig into the deeper question underneath it all: when is it actually wise to let them, and when does silence, avoidance, or ‘being chill’ just keep you stuck in the same painful pattern? Adrienne brings a grounded therapeutic lens to the idea of boundaries, emotional regulation, and choosing your response instead of reacting on impulse. Lucy pushes on the real-world complications - what if letting it go means tolerating bad behaviour, losing connection, or ignoring something morally important? Together, we test where the line is between healthy detachment and necessary confrontation. This episode is perfect for anyone who has ever felt excluded, overreacted too quickly, or struggled to know when to speak up and when to let go. Take aways: why “let them” is easier in theory than in practice how to tell the difference between a situation that is truly not about you and one that needs a response what happens when we confuse someone’s behaviour with our own worth why calming your nervous system matters more than winning the argument how to spot the patterns, stories, and childhood beliefs that get activated when you feel excluded Find us at: www.adriennekirk.uk or www.presenceofmind.life Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy (https://acast.com/privacy) for more information.

Reach and audience

Public platform figures. Ratings count people who left a rating, not total listeners.

YouTube views

265,453

Score snapshot 15 Sept 2025

Spotify

5.0 / 5

6 ratings

Podcast Authority Score: 58 / 100

A composite of feed quality, social presence, YouTube performance and engagement. Read the methodology.

Quality

55

Social presence

0

YouTube

86

Engagement

68

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