by Not a Tiger Mom Podcast
Not a Tiger Mom is hosted by Asian-American moms Bettina Lopez-Lam, MS, SLP-CCC and Jenny Sun Lai, MA, BCBA Together they share real conversations about raising autistic kids, navigating culture and identity, and breaking cycles for the next generation. The show explores both the challenges and the joys of parenting while centering neurodiversity and community. New episodes every month.
Language
🇺🇲
Publishing Since
4/8/2024
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March 3, 2026
<p>In this episode, we sit down with Iris , a late-identified AuDHD speech therapist, mom of two neurodiverse kids, and fellow Asian American navigating identity.</p><p><br></p><p>Topics we covered:<br>Group therapy vs. one-on-one therapy, Iris' & Bettina's adult diagnosis story, cultural identity, social media, unmasking, and going inward</p><p><br></p><p>If you’ve ever wondered:<br>“Why doesn’t traditional therapy work for me?”<br>“Is it okay to heal differently?”<br></p><p>This conversation is for you.</p><p><br></p><p>Terms to know: </p><p><strong>SLP (Speech-Language Pathologist)</strong><br>A licensed professional who supports communication, language, speech, and social communication development.</p><p><br></p><p><strong>Neurodivergent (ND)</strong><br>A term describing brains that function differently from what’s considered “typical,” including autism, ADHD, PDA, dyslexia, and more.</p><p><br></p><p><strong>AuDHD</strong><br>A term used by people who identify as both autistic and ADHD.</p><p><br></p><p><strong>PDA (Pathological Demand Avoidance / Persistent Drive for Autonomy)</strong><br>A profile within autism and ADHD characterized by a nervous system-based need to resist or avoid demands due to heightened threat response.</p><p><br></p><p><strong>Masking</strong><br>Suppressing or hiding autistic/ADHD traits to appear “socially acceptable.” Often leads to burnout and identity confusion.</p><p><br></p><p><strong>Unmasking</strong><br>The process of reconnecting with and expressing one’s authentic neurodivergent self.</p><p><br></p><p><strong>Interoception</strong><br>The ability to sense internal body signals (hunger, anxiety, heart rate, emotions). Many neurodivergent people experience interoceptive differences.</p><p><br></p><p><strong>Somatics / Somatic Work</strong><br>Body-based therapeutic approaches that focus on nervous system regulation and stored trauma.</p><p><br></p><p><strong>GLP (Gestalt Language Processor)</strong><br>A language development style where individuals learn language in chunks or scripts before breaking them down into smaller units.</p><p><br></p>
November 2, 2025
<p>Parenting neurodivergent kids can be isolating, but trying to do it all alone can quietly break you and your marriage. In this episode, the we open up about the invisible weight that "autism families" carry: the fear of trusting others to watch our kids. Finding (and expanding) your village isn’t just about getting help.. it’s about keeping your relationship alive. </p><p>We also unpack experiences with <strong>PDA (Pathological Demand Avoidance)</strong>, explaining what that might look like and how it shows up at home.</p><p><br></p><p> <strong>Terms & Definitions</strong></p><p><strong>Neurodivergent</strong> – Individuals whose brain processes differ from societal norms (autism, ADHD, dyslexia, etc.).</p><p><br></p><p><strong>Meltdown</strong> – A response to sensory or emotional overload; not a behavioral choice (not the same as tantrums)</p><p><br></p><p><strong>Masking</strong> – Suppressing authentic traits to appear “typical,” often at personal cost.</p><p><br></p><p><strong>PDA (Pathological Demand Avoidance)</strong> – A profile within autism or ADHD marked by anxiety-driven avoidance of demands.</p><p><br></p><p><strong>Reparenting</strong> – Healing by giving yourself and your children the emotional support you didn’t receive as a child.</p><p><br></p><p><strong>Roommate Syndrome</strong> – When partners lose intimacy and connection, functioning only as co-parents or taskmates.</p><p><br></p><p><strong>Apostolic Duty</strong> – A Filipino phrase implying grandparents have a sacred responsibility to care for their grandchildren (“apo”).</p><p><br></p><p>Follow us on Instagram: </p><p><a href="instagram.com/notatigermompodcast" target="_blank" rel="ugc noopener noreferrer">@notatigermompodcast</a></p><p><a href="instagram.com/beeingaudhd" target="_blank" rel="ugc noopener noreferrer">@beeingaudhd</a></p><p><a href="instagram.com/msjennybx" target="_blank" rel="ugc noopener noreferrer">@msjennybx</a></p>
September 20, 2025
<p>In this episode, we sit down with <strong>Daniella (@autism.conmigo)</strong> to talk about what it's like raising autistic kids at the intersections of culture, language, and neurodiversity. We go deep into breaking stigma in immigrant families, navigating faith and shame, and the power of naming autism for what it is.</p><p>Daniella shares her journey from teacher to advocate, what inclusion in classrooms should look like, and why homeschooling became the right choice for her family. We also unpack the DIR Floortime vs. ABA conversation, access barriers for families, and why representation and chosen family matter so much in our communities.</p><p><br></p><p>Terms to Know</p><p><strong>DIR/Floortime</strong><br>Developmental, Individual-differences, Relationship-based approach. It’s a play-based framework that focuses on connection, joy, and following a child’s lead. </p><p><br></p><p><strong>ABA (Applied Behavior Analysis)</strong><br>A therapy model often covered by insurance for autistic kids. It uses behavior principles to teach skills and reduce barriers. Families may have different experiences with ABA, and there’s ongoing debate about its approaches and outcomes.</p><p><br></p><p><strong>Inclusion</strong><br>An educational approach where students with disabilities learn alongside their peers in general education classrooms, with supports and accommodations as needed. True inclusion requires trained staff and resources, not just placement in the same room.</p><p><br></p><p><strong>Segregated Classrooms</strong><br>Separate classes for students with disabilities or specific needs, apart from general education peers. Often used when schools lack staff or training for inclusive models.</p><p><br></p><p><strong>Intersectionality</strong><br>The way different parts of a person’s identity (race, culture, disability, immigration status, language, gender, etc.) overlap to create unique experiences, challenges, and strengths.</p><p><br></p><p><strong>Stigma</strong><br>Negative beliefs, shame, or stereotypes attached to autism or disability — often shaped by cultural or religious views.</p><p><br></p><p><strong>Masking</strong><br>When autistic or neurodivergent people hide or suppress parts of themselves to “fit in” or feel safer in social or public settings.</p><p><br></p><p><strong>Regional Center (California)</strong><br>State-funded agencies that connect people with developmental disabilities (like autism) to services such as therapies, respite, and support programs.</p><p><br></p><p><strong>Self-Determination Program (California)</strong><br>An option through Regional Center that gives families more control over their budget so they can choose supports, staff, and programs that best fit their needs.</p><p><br></p><p>Follow us on Instagram: </p><p><a href="https://instagram.com/notatigermompodcast" target="_blank" rel="ugc noopener noreferrer">@notatigermompodcast</a> </p><p><a href="https://instagram.com/beeingaudhd" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferer">@beeingaudhd</a></p><p><a href="https://instagram.com/msjennybx" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferer">@msjennybx</a></p><p><br>Connect with Daniella: </p><p><a href="https://instagram.com/autism.conmigo" target="_blank" rel="ugc noopener noreferrer">@autism.conmigo</a> | <a href="allplayisokay.com" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferer">allplayisokay.com</a></p>
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Not a Tiger Mom is hosted by Asian-American moms Bettina Lopez-Lam, MS, SLP-CCC and Jenny Sun Lai, MA, BCBA
Together they share real conversations about raising autistic kids, navigating culture and identity, and breaking cycles for the next generation. The show explores both the challenges and the joys of parenting while centering neurodiversity and community.
New episodes every month.
This podcast updates weekly.
This podcast is available on 6 platforms including Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and more. You can also use the RSS feed directly.
Yes, this podcast regularly features guests.
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