About Redacted: What Divorced Women Aren't Telling You
A limited series podcast where divorced women share their stories—sometimes anonymously—and talk honestly about their experiences before, during, and after divorce.
Topics covered: Why so many women describe “becoming small” inside their marriagesThe mental load, emotional labor, and default parenting—and why they don’t get creditedThe body’s wisdom: physical symptoms as a signal to get outWhat divorce does to your brain and why you couldn’t read novels (raises hand!)The broken legal system, waiting periods, and why we have no guidance in or out of marriageCouples counseling and its limitations—especially with narcissistic partnersWhat it looks like to r...
4 Jun 2026
The "Now What?" Era: Unbecoming a Wife
SHOW NOTES: In this episode, we cover: How Cindy went from ghostwriter and editor to finding her own voice — and launching The Mother Lode on SubstackThe role Maggie Smith's You Could Make This Place Beautiful played as a lantern for both of us during our divorcesMDMA therapy, IFS therapy, and the "good girl" conditioning that keeps women trapped in marriages long past their expiration dateWhy couples therapy can actually harm women — particularly when covert abuse or personality disorders ar...
21 May 2026
Waiting for Permission: The Intersection of Grief and Divorce
Show Notes: A writer reads her original flash nonfiction piece about grief, permission, and the marriage she knew she needed to leaveOn the particular cruelty of losing your mother while also losing your marriage—and what happens when there is no space to grieve both at onceThe moment she told the sky before she told anyone else, and how her mother's voice found her on a morning runWhy so many women feel they need to justify leaving a marriage, that wanting out isn't enough, that intuition do...
14 May 2026
I Didn't Want to Be a Nag: The Quiet Ways a Marriage Falls Apart
This episode begins with two anonymous essays and unfolds into a conversation about marriage, divorce, patriarchy, emotional labor, and the things women learn to normalize. Using the lens of a neglected house, today’s writer explores what it means to spend years trying to be “respectful,” “patient,” and “not a nag” while slowly disappearing inside your own life. Together, we talk about: the emotional labor of walking on eggshellsthe stories women inherit about being “good wives”why so many wo...
7 Apr 2026
I'd F*cking Date Me
Topics covered: Parachute relationships — what they are and why they matter (and why they sometimes crash-land hard)“Divorce doulas” — passing the torch, bearing the lantern, and why women are the safety net nobody talks aboutUnhealed men, therapy, and the resignation that keeps people stuckThe “sorry about us” part — apologizing for your own existence in relationshipsGoing from shame about your circumstances to “I’d fucking date me”Why the lessons keep coming until you actually learn themQuo...
27 Mar 2026
I feel shame that I'm still grieving
Today’s episode of the limited podcast series features one of last year’s anonymous authors reading her piece, Definitely not a phoenix. It received so much support ran it ran on the Substack column—many divorced women related to the pressure to “rise from the ashes” as some sort of before/after success story. This piece is a much more honest look at what healing really looks like. I loved the conversation we had after she read her piece, and I think you will too. Show Notes A writer re...
18 Mar 2026
I was choosing between two bad options
Show Notes A writer reads her original personal essay about the moment she knew her marriage couldn't survive — a business trip, a broken collarbone, and a husband who refused to take their three-year-old son to the hospitalHost Steph and the guest discuss what it means to heal from a relationship you didn't initially recognize as traumatic, and why recovery is anything but linearThe impossible calculus of divorce when children are involved — staying feels wrong, but leaving means they're wit...
6 Mar 2026
Protecting men with our silence
Content warning: This episode contains a personal essay that references infidelity and the discovery of illegal pornography involving minors. Please listen with that in mind. Show Notes A writer reads her original personal essay about discovering her husband’s infidelities, disturbing online activity, and a Craigslist ad — and the quiet, calculated way she chose to end her marriageSteph and her anonymous guest reflect on the painful decision to protect a spouse’s image from their adult childr...
18 Feb 2026
Is This All There Is?
Welcome to Redacted: What Divorced Women Aren't Telling You, a limited podcast series featuring stories and conversations from anonymous divorced women. In today's conversation, we cover: The question that haunts many marriages: "Is this all there is?"What it looks like to have the courage to leave an unsatisfying marriage—especially 35 years ago. The gifts of living alone, and the negotiations of living with a partnerHow women in particular edit themselves in relationships o...
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