How do you know you're showing up the way you mean to? You won't unless you stop to check.
MJ and Ash are a husband and wife with completely opposite wiring. Raising kids in the years the intent is high, but the capacity is low. Every week they get honest about the story playing underneath the home they’re trying to build together, share notes and recalibrate before the next week. Because wanting better doesn’t always mean doing better.
They heard it. The tone, the words, the part you would take back. And the instinct after is to move on fast and hope it didn't stick.
But what if the part they actually need to see is what comes next?
We walk back through one of our own arguments we unintentionally had in front of the kids, what led up to it, and what we did in front of them afterward. Because your kids need your repentance more than your perfection.
Resources:
Movie Mentioned: CODA
A few weeks back we spent three episodes on building a reading plan. I wrote the whole thing out in this post, the three steps, the book lists, and how to push through building a new habit.
Continue the conversation:
→ Your Next Listen: Ep. 184 — When the Past and Present Collide - Communication Under Pressure — If 197 is about the repair, 184 is about the spiral that got you there, and how to catch it sooner the next time the pressure is on
New drop on Mondays. If this helped, pass it along or leave a review. It’s the best way to help more people see their underscore, too.
Stay connected: 🌐 http://honestunderscore.com
📩 Enjoyed the episode? The conversation goes deeper in The Greenroom. Once a month we give the field notes version of the things we’re learning here so we can realign what we mean to do with what shows up. [Let me into The Greenroom]
✉️ Something from the episode hit home? Send it our way → hello@honestunderscore.com. We always enjoy hearing from you.
28 Sept 2026
196 - When the Things You Love Start Feeling Like a To-Do List
You said yes to all of it. The kids, the house, the work, the people who count on you.
But somewhere in there it stopped feeling like a life and started feeling like a to-do list. What if the fix isn't carrying less? We talk about how we fight to keep the joy in the things we're not putting down.
Resources:
A few weeks back we spent three episodes on building a reading plan. I wrote the whole thing out in this post, the three steps, the book lists, and how to push through building a new habit.
Continue the conversation:
→ Your Next Listen: Ep. 186 — What If Duty And Desire Weren't Meant to Be Split? — If this week gave you the how, 186 gives you the why, because what you have to do and what you actually want were never meant to sit on opposite sides.
New drop on Mondays. If this helped, pass it along or leave a review. It’s the best way to help more people see their underscore, too.
Stay connected: 🌐 http://honestunderscore.com
📩 Enjoyed the episode? The conversation goes deeper in The Greenroom. Once a month we give the field notes version of the things we’re learning here so we can realign what we mean to do with what shows up. [Let me into The Greenroom]
✉️ Something from the episode hit home? Send it our way → hello@honestunderscore.com. We always enjoy hearing from you.
21 Sept 2026
195 - What If Rest Isn't Just Doing Less?
Most of us only think about rest when we're already out of gas. And the usual advice is to clear the schedule, which helps right up until you realize the empty evening you spent scrolling gave you nothing back.
So what if rest has two halves and we only ever talk about one? We get into rhythms that hold our family together on the hard weeks, what we cut first, and what we make more room for on purpose.
Resources:
Margin: Restoring Emotional, Physical, Financial, and Time Reserves to Overloaded Lives by Richard A. Swenson, MD
Continue the conversation:
→ Your Next Listen: Ep. 176 — Good Intentions Aren't Enough, Finding Restorative Rest as a Family — If 194 has you rethinking what rest is for, this one goes into the time MJ tried to give Ash a break and it didn't restore anything, and the difference between rest vs. restoration we learned the hard way.
New drop on Mondays. If this helped, pass it along to help someone else or leave a review. It’s the best way to help more people see their underscore, too.
Stay connected: 🌐 http://honestunderscore.com
📩 Enjoyed the episode? The conversation goes deeper in The Greenroom. Once a month we give the field notes version of the things we’re learning at the table so we can recalibrate what we mean to do with what actually shows up. [Let me into The Greenroom]
✉️ Something from this episode hit home? Send it our way → hello@honestunderscore.com. We always enjoy hearing from you.
Reach and audience
Public platform figures. Ratings count people who left a rating, not total listeners.
Apple Podcasts (US)
5.0 / 5
6 ratings
Spotify
5.0 / 5
7 ratings
Podcast Authority Score: 50 / 100
A composite of feed quality, social presence, YouTube performance and engagement. Read the methodology.
Quality
71
Social presence
0
YouTube
0
Engagement
71
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