Worst Movies Ever Played is an actual play podcast where three comedians use a roleplaying game to improvise hilariously bad VHS movies. The kind you'd find scavenging through the dumpster behind a Blockbuster Video.
Hosts Patrick Baker (Regular Show), Brent Butler (Norm Macdonald Live), and Geoffrey Golden (Wet Hot American Summer RPG) produce cheesy movies on the fly with the help of some dice, a tabletop RPG, and starting in season 3: comedian guests stars. They play every role and narrate the action, while Hollywood sound designer Adam Baker (The Invisible Man) provides the music and SFX. No lights! No cameras! But hours of action! Also plenty of dice-rolling, bizarre characters, and mind-numbing plot twists – all without the rental fees.
It’s fourth down and fangs out for the North Bend High School football team.
Joey Clift joins us for the conclusion to Dark Side of the Noon. After Buff accidentally kills Postmaster Charlie with a remarkably powerful BB gun, Milton leads a forensic investigation to prove Charlie was a vampire, thus making the murder totally chill. Meanwhile, Tekanii investigates the presence of Russian vampires in the area, and starts by questioning his mortal enemies: The Otter Men. At the table, Brent wins the game thirty minutes early by choosing his favored tree for the final battle.
Worst Movies Ever Played is an actual-play comedy RPG podcast where the hosts create bad VHS movies. The films are made using only the power of imagination, a few pencils and dice, and a very expensive Hollywood sound designer.
CREDITS:
Buff McBicep: Joey Clift
Milton T. Snazzwhimper: Geoffrey Golden
Tekanii: Brent Butler
Your Director: Patrick Baker
Story Editor: Stephen Indrisano
Sound Design: Adam Baker
Financier: Our Venmo, which is @worstmoviespod
MOVIE TRIVIA: When the story was rejected as a Halloween episode of Northern Exposure, the writer then pitched it as a Christmas episode of Northern Exposure. He was then fired from the writing staff of Northern Exposure and wrote this movie.
2 Dec 2025
Dark Side of the Noon (Part 1)
Forget Friday Night Lights. This is Friday Night Bites!
Comedian and TV writer Joey Clift joins us for Dark Side of the Noon. It's the winter solstice and the darkest day of the year in North Bend, Alaska. A tiny town with a secret, but most importantly a football game to win - that is until the rival team turns vampire. Now the town's only hope is dimwitted jock Buff McBicep, his coach/history teacher/cryptid enthusiast Wiley Pete, and local nerd Milton T. Snazzwhimper. At the table, Brent wonders what kind of pilot ratings creatures of the night might have. Geoffrey discovers he had a little Gary Gygax living in him the whole time.
Worst Movies Ever Played is an actual-play comedy RPG podcast where the hosts create bad VHS movies. The films are made using only the power of imagination, a few pencils and dice, and a very expensive Hollywood sound designer.
CREDITS:
Buff McBicep: Joey Clift
Milton T. Snazzwhimper: Geoffrey Golden
Tekanii: Brent Butler
Your Director: Patrick Baker
Story Editor: Stephen Indrisano
Sound Design: Adam Baker
Financier: Our Venmo, which is @worstmoviespod
MOVIE TRIVIA: The film’s writer initially pitched this story as a Halloween episode of Northern Exposure.
25 Nov 2025
A Pilgrimage of Pets (Part 2)
“You must be status and you must be quo, because I hate your f**king guts.” —Your adorable family cat, probably
Joan Ford joins us for the decidedly-adult children’s movie A Pilgrimage of Pets! Faced with certain incarceration in the pound, Avril and Kingy make a run for it to the woods, leaving Mae to fend for himself in the county pound. At the table (sort of), we watch helplessly as a motion picture editor misses precious moments in his young children’s lives because he has to repeatedly blur out a dog’s anus.
Worst Movies Ever Played is an actual-play comedy RPG podcast where the hosts create bad VHS movies. The films are made using only the power of imagination, a few pencils and dice, and a very expensive Hollywood sound designer.
CREDITS:
Avril: Joan Ford
Kingy: Geoffrey Golden
Middle-aged Ecclesiastes (Mae): Brent Butler
Your Director: Patrick Baker
Story Editor: Stephen Indrisano
Sound Design: Adam Baker
Financier: Our Venmo, which is @worstmoviespod
MOVIE TRIVIA: Based on his work in A Pilgrimage of Pets, the film’s Assistant Editor was hired to work on Human Centipede.
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Apple Podcasts (US)
5.0 / 5
31 ratings
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