How To Have Sex
Claim This Podcastby Jay-Jay Feeney & Melissa Vranjes
Podcast Overview
<h4>How To Have Sex is the sex education you never got at school, and have been quietly winging ever since. Hosted by broadcaster Jay-Jay Feeney and certified somatic sex and relationship coach Melissa Vranjes. One very curious host and one expert who actually knows the answers. Every episode tackles a real topic: how to improve your sex life, how to talk about intimacy without killing the mood, how to have better orgasms, how to spice things up in a long-term relationship.... you get the idea. Shame-free, refreshingly practical, and occasionally so mortifying you'll need to pause it. New episodes weekly.</h4><h4><br></h4><h4>Hosted by:</h4><h4>Jay-Jay Feeney - 30+ years in radio, trusted voice for Kiwi women.</h4><h4>Melissa Vranjes - Certified Sex & Relationship Coach, featured in VOGUE & GRAZIA</h4><h4><br></h4><h4>Together, we combine humour and expert knowledge to normalise conversations around sexual wellness.</h4><h4>Breaking taboos. Building confidence. Supporting modern intimacy.</h4><hr><p style='color:grey; font-size:0.75em;'> Hosted on Acast. See <a style='color:grey;' target='_blank' rel='noopener noreferrer' href='https://acast.com/privacy'>acast.com/privacy</a> for more information.</p>
Language
🇺🇲
Publishing Since
2/27/2026
3 verified contact emails on file for How To Have Sex
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Recent Episodes
August 11, 2026
How To Come Back To Sex After a Dry Spell
<p>Been a while? No judgment here. Dust off the cobwebs, we've got you. This week Jay-Jay and Mel are talking dry spells: what actually counts as one, why they happen even in happy relationships, and how to come back from one without the pressure of "perfect" sex.</p><br><p>We bust the myth about your vagina supposedly "closing up" after a few dry years, unpack why going straight from zero to hero is a bad idea, and get into vaginismus, pelvic floor health, and why penetration might be the last thing you want to put back on the table. Then things get really interesting with a deep dive into body workers and internal mapping … Jay-Jay needed convincing this was a real job.</p><br><p>There's also a very relatable tangent about trying to reconnect with your partner while the dog watches from the end of the bed, plus practical tools: sexual currency, breathwork, self-pleasure as a way back in, and the exact question to ask a partner who's gone quiet on sex.</p><br><p>Whether you're single and out of practice or years deep in a relationship drift, this one's for you.</p><br><p>How to Have Sex is a shame-free sex education podcast hosted by broadcaster Jay-Jay Feeney and certified sex and relationship coach Melissa Vranjes; one nosy, curious host and one expert who actually knows what she's talking about. Every episode tackles the stuff most of us were never taught, minus the awkward classroom diagrams.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> This podcast is proudly sponsored by <strong>Wild Secrets</strong>.</p><p> Shop online at <a href="http://www.wildsecrets.co.nz" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">www.wildsecrets.co.nz</a> & use the code <strong>HTHS</strong> for 20% off sitewide…</p><p> Pleasure Delivered.</p><br><p> <strong>JOIN OUR COMMUNITY!</strong></p><p><strong> SUBSCRIBE TO OUR SUBSTACK </strong><a href="https://hthspodcast.substack.com" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://hthspodcast.substack.com</a></p><p><strong> INSTAGRAM </strong><a href="https://www.instagram.com/howtohavesexpodcast" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://www.instagram.com/howtohavesexpodcast</a></p><p> <strong>TIKTOK</strong> <a href="https://www.tiktok.com/@howtohaves.pod" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://www.tiktok.com/@howtohaves.pod</a></p><p> <strong>FACEBOOK </strong><a href="https://www.facebook.com/HowToHaveSexPodcast" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://www.facebook.com/HowToHaveSexPodcast</a></p><p> <strong>YOUTUBE</strong> <a href="https://www.youtube.com/@Howtohavesexpodcast" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://www.youtube.com/@Howtohavesexpodcast</a></p><p> <strong>EMAIL</strong> <a href="mailto:howtohavesexpodcastnz@gmail.com" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">howtohavesexpodcastnz@gmail.com</a></p><p> <strong>Support the podcast! </strong><a href="https://buymeacoffee.com/howtohavesex" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://buymeacoffee.com/howtohavesex</a></p><p> </p><p> How To Have Sex is produced by <strong>PodLab</strong>, Auckland. <a href="https://www.podlab.co.nz" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://www.podlab.co.nz</a></p><br><p> <strong>HOSTS:</strong></p><p><strong> Jay-Jay Feeney</strong> – Media Personality</p><p> Instagram/TikTok: @JJFeeneyNZ</p><p> Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/JayJayFeeney</p><p> </p><p> <strong>Melissa Vranjes – </strong>Certified Somatic Sex & Relationship Coach</p><p> www.melissavranjes.com</p><p> Instagram: @melissavranjes</p><p> </p><p> Ready to feel more confident, connected, and turned on in your body?<strong> Join Sex School here: </strong>https://www.melissavranjes.com/sex-school</p><p><strong> </strong></p><p> </p><p><strong> </strong></p><p> </p><p> </p><hr><p style='color:grey; font-size:0.75em;'> Hosted on Acast. See <a style='color:grey;' target='_blank' rel='noopener noreferrer' href='https://acast.com/privacy'>acast.com/privacy</a> for more information.</p>
August 3, 2026
How to Get Really Turned On
<p>Ever been genuinely attracted to someone and still felt... nothing? Or found a candle way more arousing than anything actually sexual? This week Jay-Jay and Mel dig into the real psychology of arousal: what turns you on, why it's not as simple as "just get in the mood," and how to figure out your own erotic blueprint.</p><br><p>Mel introduces the erotic mind map, a tool she uses with her one-on-one clients, and puts Jay-Jay through it live on the mic. What starts as a laugh turns into a surprisingly honest conversation about connection, desire, exhibitionism, and a confession involving a romantic liason on a golf course!</p><br><p>You'll learn the difference between liking a sex act and actually feeling turned on, how porn and pop culture shape what we think should arouse us, and a simple brakes and accelerators exercise you can try tonight. </p><br><p>Plus: a Wild Secrets giveaway! </p><br><p>How to Have Sex is a shame-free sex education podcast hosted by broadcaster Jay-Jay Feeney and certified sex and relationship coach Melissa Vranjes; one nosy, curious host and one expert who actually knows what she's talking about. Every episode tackles the stuff most of us were never taught, minus the awkward classroom diagrams.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> This podcast is proudly sponsored by <strong>Wild Secrets</strong>.</p><p> Shop online at <a href="http://www.wildsecrets.co.nz/" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">www.wildsecrets.co.nz</a> & use the code <strong>HTHS</strong> for 20% off sitewide…</p><p> Pleasure Delivered.</p><br><p> <strong>JOIN OUR COMMUNITY!</strong></p><p><strong> SUBSCRIBE TO OUR SUBSTACK </strong><a href="https://hthspodcast.substack.com/" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://hthspodcast.substack.com</a></p><p><strong> INSTAGRAM </strong><a href="https://www.instagram.com/howtohavesexpodcast" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://www.instagram.com/howtohavesexpodcast</a></p><p> <strong>TIKTOK</strong> <a href="https://www.tiktok.com/@howtohaves.pod" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://www.tiktok.com/@howtohaves.pod</a></p><p> <strong>FACEBOOK </strong><a href="https://www.facebook.com/HowToHaveSexPodcast" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://www.facebook.com/HowToHaveSexPodcast</a></p><p> <strong>YOUTUBE</strong> <a href="https://www.youtube.com/@Howtohavesexpodcast" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://www.youtube.com/@Howtohavesexpodcast</a></p><p> <strong>EMAIL</strong> <a href="mailto:howtohavesexpodcastnz@gmail.com" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">howtohavesexpodcastnz@gmail.com</a></p><p> <strong>Support the podcast! </strong><a href="https://buymeacoffee.com/howtohavesex" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://buymeacoffee.com/howtohavesex</a></p><p> </p><p> How To Have Sex is produced by <strong>PodLab</strong>, Auckland. <a href="https://www.podlab.co.nz/" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://www.podlab.co.nz</a></p><br><p> <strong>HOSTS:</strong></p><p><strong> Jay-Jay Feeney</strong> – Media Personality</p><p> Instagram/TikTok: @JJFeeneyNZ</p><p> Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/JayJayFeeney</p><p> </p><p> <strong>Melissa Vranjes – </strong>Certified Somatic Sex & Relationship Coach</p><p> www.melissavranjes.com</p><p> Instagram: @melissavranjes</p><p> </p><p> Ready to feel more confident, connected, and turned on in your body?<strong> Join Sex School here: </strong>https://www.melissavranjes.com/sex-school</p><p><strong> </strong></p><p> </p><p><strong> </strong></p><p> </p><h1> </h1><hr><p style='color:grey; font-size:0.75em;'> Hosted on Acast. See <a style='color:grey;' target='_blank' rel='noopener noreferrer' href='https://acast.com/privacy'>acast.com/privacy</a> for more information.</p>
July 28, 2026
How To Get Out Of Your Head During Sex
<p>Ever been fully naked, fully touched, and but still mentally reviewing the grocery list? Welcome to the club. This week Jay-Jay and Mel unpack why so many of us check out during sex, even when everything happening is objectively hot.</p><br><p>They dig into the classic thinking-brain-versus-feeling-body problem, why meditation was never really about clearing your mind, the wild timing gap between when men and women tend to orgasm, and how old trauma responses like fawning can silently hijack your sex life without you noticing. Then Mel walks through her five go-to somatic tools, breath, awareness, movement, touch and sound, and demonstrates them live on the mic. Results: mixed, honest, very funny.</p><br><p>Plus: redefining the quickie (it does not have to mean five minutes flat), the truth about lube, and why your partner genuinely cannot read your mind, so stop expecting them to. </p><p>Homework included. Bring tissues, or don't, no judgment.</p><br><p>Got a confession or a question for the show? Send it in, we might read it out (anonymously, always).</p><br><p>How to Have Sex is a shame-free sex education podcast hosted by broadcaster Jay-Jay Feeney and certified sex and relationship coach Melissa Vranjes; one nosy, curious host and one expert who actually knows what she's talking about. Every episode tackles the stuff most of us were never taught, minus the awkward classroom diagrams.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> This podcast is proudly sponsored by <strong>Wild Secrets</strong>.</p><p> Shop online at <a href="http://www.wildsecrets.co.nz" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">www.wildsecrets.co.nz</a> & use the code <strong>HTHS</strong> for 20% off sitewide…</p><p> Pleasure Delivered.</p><br><p> <strong>JOIN OUR COMMUNITY!</strong></p><p><strong> SUBSCRIBE TO OUR SUBSTACK </strong><a href="https://hthspodcast.substack.com" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://hthspodcast.substack.com</a></p><p><strong> INSTAGRAM </strong><a href="https://www.instagram.com/howtohavesexpodcast" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://www.instagram.com/howtohavesexpodcast</a></p><p> <strong>TIKTOK</strong> <a href="https://www.tiktok.com/@howtohaves.pod" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://www.tiktok.com/@howtohaves.pod</a></p><p> <strong>FACEBOOK </strong><a href="https://www.facebook.com/HowToHaveSexPodcast" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://www.facebook.com/HowToHaveSexPodcast</a></p><p> <strong>YOUTUBE</strong> <a href="https://www.youtube.com/@Howtohavesexpodcast" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://www.youtube.com/@Howtohavesexpodcast</a></p><p> <strong>EMAIL</strong> <a href="mailto:howtohavesexpodcastnz@gmail.com" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">howtohavesexpodcastnz@gmail.com</a></p><p> <strong>Support the podcast! </strong><a href="https://buymeacoffee.com/howtohavesex" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://buymeacoffee.com/howtohavesex</a></p><p> </p><p> How To Have Sex is produced by <strong>PodLab</strong>, Auckland. <a href="https://www.podlab.co.nz" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://www.podlab.co.nz</a></p><br><p> <strong>HOSTS:</strong></p><p><strong> Jay-Jay Feeney</strong> – Media Personality</p><p> Instagram/TikTok: @JJFeeneyNZ</p><p> Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/JayJayFeeney</p><p> </p><p> <strong>Melissa Vranjes – </strong>Certified Somatic Sex & Relationship Coach</p><p> www.melissavranjes.com</p><p> Instagram: @melissavranjes</p><p> </p><p> Ready to feel more confident, connected, and turned on in your body?<strong> Join Sex School here: </strong>https://www.melissavranjes.com/sex-school</p><p><strong> </strong></p><p><br></p><hr><p style='color:grey; font-size:0.75em;'> Hosted on Acast. See <a style='color:grey;' target='_blank' rel='noopener noreferrer' href='https://acast.com/privacy'>acast.com/privacy</a> for more information.</p>
23 total episodes available
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- What is How To Have Sex?
<h4>How To Have Sex is the sex education you never got at school, and have been quietly winging ever since. Hosted by broadcaster Jay-Jay Feeney and certified somatic sex and relationship coach Melissa Vranjes. One very curious host and one expert who actually knows the answers. Every episode tackles a real topic: how to improve your sex life, how to talk about intimacy without killing the mood, how to have better orgasms, how to spice things up in a long-term relationship.... you get the idea. Shame-free, refreshingly practical, and occasionally so mortifying you'll need to pause it. New episodes weekly.</h4><h4><br></h4><h4>Hosted by:</h4><h4>Jay-Jay Feeney - 30+ years in radio, trusted voice for Kiwi women.</h4><h4>Melissa Vranjes - Certified Sex & Relationship Coach, featured in VOGUE & GRAZIA</h4><h4><br></h4><h4>Together, we combine humour and expert knowledge to normalise conversations around sexual wellness.</h4><h4>Breaking taboos. Building confidence. Supporting modern intimacy.</h4><hr><p style='color:grey; font-size:0.75em;'> Hosted on Acast. See <a style='color:grey;' target='_blank' rel='noopener noreferrer' href='https://acast.com/privacy'>acast.com/privacy</a> for more information.</p> - How often does this podcast release new episodes?
This podcast updates daily.
- Where can I listen to this podcast?
This podcast is available on 4 platforms including Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and more. You can also use the RSS feed directly.
- Does this podcast accept guests?
No, this podcast does not typically feature guests.
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