Self-Led in Bed: An IFS and Sexuality Podcast offers curious people a space to learn more about their fascinating internal sexual landscapes and to discover their authentic sexual Self, a resource we all have within which can lead and enrich our sexual lives. We will do this through the lens of Self-Led Sexuality, an integrative approach developed by your host which is rooted in Internal Family Systems (IFS). You will be educated, entertained, and invited to get to know the diverse parts of yourself who have roles in the unfolding of your unique sexual story.

Self-Led in Bed: An IFS and Sexuality Podcast
Claim This Podcastby Patricia Rich
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Podcast Overview
Self-Led in Bed: An IFS and Sexuality Podcast offers curious people a space to learn more about their fascinating internal sexual landscapes and to discover their authentic sexual Self, a resource we all have within which can lead and enrich our sexual lives. We will do this through the lens of Self-Led Sexuality, an integrative approach developed by your host which is rooted in Internal Family Systems (IFS). You will be educated, entertained, and invited to get to know the diverse parts of yourself who have roles in the unfolding of your unique sexual story.
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Publishing Since
1/23/2025
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Recent Episodes

July 28, 2026
34: Voices in my Bed: Trauma, Psychosis and IFS, with Stephanie Mitchell
<p>Disclaimer: This episode contains discussions of psychosis, non-ordinary states, sexual trauma, transference, and adult sexuality. Listener discretion is advised.</p><p>"I think full healing comes to a place where the voice just doesn't have to be disowned as something outside of me. It becomes me, a part of me." — Stephanie Mitchell</p><p>Patty sits down with Stephanie Mitchell, a Certified IFS therapist specializing in non-ordinary states, psychosis, and complex developmental trauma for a personally revealing and intellectually adventurous conversation. Stephanie works at what she calls the pointy end of distress — with clients experiencing voices, visions, and states that often get labeled psychosis or schizophrenia — and explores with Patty how those experiences intersect with sexual dilemmas and trauma.</p><p>They explore how voices and visions often carry what other parts are too afraid to know — including around sexuality, identity, and desire — and how IFS's commitment to curiosity rather than pathology creates a radically different kind of encounter with these experiences. They discuss sexual transference in the therapy room with unusual candor, the concept of the dignity of risk, the essential importance of a well-held therapeutic container, what attuned sexuality actually looks like when trauma has taught the body that connection isn't safe, and the difference between seeking reassurance and following a trailhead to what the parts underneath actually need.</p><p>The episode closes with Patty and Stephanie finding their way to a beautiful full-circle moment — that voice, the one we find in safety, the one that can say what it wants and what it doesn't, the one that can finally speak up even after being deeply dissociated — is what being Self-led in Bed is really about.</p><p><strong>About Stephanie Mitchell</strong></p><p>Stephanie is a Level 3 Certified IFS Therapist who specialises in working with early developmental trauma and experiences which often get labelled as ‘mental illness’.Stephanie is interested in how healing occurs in the human to human relationship, outside the constructs of diagnostic labels, and offers training and consultation as well as therapy..She is currently undertaking research on IFS and Psychosis with UCSF, in collaboration with Flinders Uni Australia. </p><p><strong>Connect with Stephanie:</strong></p><p>Website: <a href="stephaniemitchell.net" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferer">stephaniemitchell.net</a></p><p>Facebbok: <a href="https://www.facebook.com/stephaniemitchelltherapy" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferer">https://www.facebook.com/stephaniemitchelltherapy</a><br>Youtube: <a href="https://www.youtube.com/@ConnectionHeals" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferer">https://www.youtube.com/@ConnectionHeals</a></p><p><br></p><p><strong>About Self-Led in Bed</strong></p><p>Self-Led in Bed is a podcast where we explore our fascinating internal sexual landscapes and discover our authentic sexual Self through the lens of Internal Family Systems (IFS).</p><p>Hosted by Patricia Rich — Certified IFS Therapist, AASECT-Certified Sex Therapist, coach, and creator of the Self-Led Sexuality and The Six S's models — each episode brings warm, smart, and often juicy conversations.</p><p><strong>Resources</strong></p><p>Get the free<a href="https://www.patriciarich.com/6sgraphic"> <strong>The Six S's of Sexual Self-Energy Infographic.</strong></a></p><p><br></p>

July 10, 2026
33: Somatic IFS for Sexual Healing and Pleasure, with LaDonna Silva
<p>“Can I bring breath to that excitement and bring myself back into the body, holding some of that excited energy and actually letting my system slow down so I can cherish that moment?” LaDonna Silva</p><p>Disclaimer: This episode contains discussions of childhood sexual abuse, trauma, and sexuality. Listener discretion is advised.</p><p>Patty sits down with LaDonna Silva,LMFT, an Assistant Trainer of Somatic IFS, to “flesh out” how this body-based approach founded by Susan McConnell can illuminate the felt experience of sexuality. They apply the five practices of Somatic IFS to sexual processes, recognizing the value of slowing down and gently exploring at the pace of safety and attunement, especially for those who have experienced sexual trauma, as she herself has. </p><p>The conversation moves from LaDonna's personal story into the heart of Somatic IFS itself, as she guides listeners through Susan McConnell's five practices — somatic awareness, conscious breathing, radical resonance, mindful movement, and attuned touch — with her own deeply embodied flavor. She and Patty then explore each practice as it might pertain to sexuality, offering a rich exploration of how the body can become a portal to pleasure rather than a place of constriction and shame.</p><p>They also explore what it means to stay in resonance with oneself when the resonance you're seeking isn't available from a partner, the relationship between burdens held in the body and the freedom to move — in bed and everywhere else — and the difference between telling your story and being present to the parts that are living it while you do.</p><p>LaDonna brings her poetic and embodied presence to every aspect of this conversation and courageously and intimately shares about her journey as a thriver, activist, healer and someone navigating the everyday dynamics of sexual intimacy in a long-term relationship.</p><p><strong>About LaDonna Silva</strong></p><p>LaDonna is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, IFS Approved Clinical Consultant, Level 3 Certified IFS Therapist, and a member of the Somatic IFS teaching staff, serving as an Assistant Trainer with Susan McConnell. With over 20 years of clinical experience, LaDonna is deeply rooted in the Internal Family Systems model and integrates Somatic IFS throughout her therapeutic, teaching and professional work. She leads IFS workshops, trainings, retreats, and multiple consultation groups, specialising in SIFS, trauma, sexual abuse and assault, grief, couples work, and support for the LGBTQI+ community. She has served on the faculty at John F. Kennedy University, the Institute of Transpersonal Psychology/Sofia University, and Santa Clara University, teaching courses in clinical practice and integrative psychotherapy. </p><p><strong>Connect with LaDonna:</strong></p><p>www.ladonnasilva.com</p><p>www.embodiedself.net</p><p>www.awakenwildhearts.com</p><p>www.souliology.com/embodied-self-embodied-system</p><p>https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100054440921577 https://www.linkedin.com/in/ladonnasilva/</p><p><br></p><p><strong>About Self-Led in Bed</strong></p><p>Self-Led in Bed is a podcast where we explore our fascinating internal sexual landscapes and discover our authentic sexual Self through the lens of Internal Family Systems (IFS).</p><p>Hosted by Patricia Rich — Certified IFS Therapist, AASECT-Certified Sex Therapist, coach, and creator of the Self-Led Sexuality and The Six S’s models — each episode brings warm, smart, and often juicy conversations.</p><p><strong>Resources</strong></p><p>Get the free <a href="https://www.patriciarich.com/sixsgraphic"><strong>The Six S's of Sexual Self-Energy Infographic.</strong></a></p><p><br></p>

June 25, 2026
32: Healing from Purity Culture through IFS, with Forest Benedict
<p>“Using IFS to heal my fear of hell…that was profound" - Forest Benedict</p><p>Disclaimer: This episode contains explicit discussions of religious trauma, purity culture, sexual shame, and adult sexuality. Listener discretion is advised.</p><p>Patty sits down with Forest Benedict, Certified IFS Therapist, Sex & Desire Coach, & Author, for a personal and wide-ranging conversation including his journey from committed purity culture believer and sex addiction therapist to deconverting from Christianity, unpublishing his own book, and rebuilding his entire practice around healing sexual shame and religious trauma with IFS.</p><p>From there, the conversation moves into the kinds of parts that often show up for those who are navigating purity culture, the power of getting to know parts through their desires rather than only their fears, and what it means for a therapist to bring genuine Self-energy into the room when a client is exploring a major change in their sexual attitudes. They also explore toxic masculinity and the particular burdens cisgender men carry, what Forest witnesses when men are finally given a space to be vulnerable and open-hearted with each other, and the discernment of what we are willing to lose in order to claim who we really are. </p><p>The episode closes with Forest's concept of Rewilding Desire — the invitation to reconnect with the parts of us that have been domesticated through trauma, religion, and culture, and to consider ways for them to express themselves in the world.</p><p><strong>About Forest Benedict</strong></p><p>Forest Benedict, LMFT is a Certified IFS Therapist with more than 16 years of clinical experience, providing online therapy in California and Washington. He became a therapist to specialize in sex addiction and went on to serve as a Clinical Director, speaker, teacher, and author of Life After Lust: Stories & Strategies for Sex & Pornography Addiction Recovery. After deconverting from Christianity seven years ago, Forest began a deep personal healing journey, unpublished his book, pursued IFS certification, and shifted his work toward using IFS to heal sexual shame and religious trauma. He now supports clients in embracing all of who they are sexually through therapy and Rewilding Desire, his IFS-based sex and desire coaching program. Forest runs an ongoing online men's group for clients in Washington and California, offers coaching worldwide, and is currently completing Sex & Intimacy Training and Certification.</p><p><strong>Connect with Forest:</strong></p><p>Instagram - @forestbenedictlmft </p><p>YouTube - @rewildingdesire</p><p>Facebook - @forestbenedictlmft</p><p>TikTok - @forestbenedictlmft @rewildingdesire</p><p>ForestBenedict.com</p><p>https://forestbenedict.com/blog-3/</p><p><strong>About Self-Led in Bed</strong></p><p>Self-Led in Bed is a podcast where we explore our fascinating internal sexual landscapes and discover our authentic sexual Self through the lens of Internal Family Systems (IFS).</p><p>Hosted by Patricia Rich, Certified IFS Therapist, AASECT-Certified Sex Therapist, coach, and creator of the Self-Led Sexuality model and The Six S’s of Sexual Self Energy Framework, each episode brings warm, smart, and often juicy conversations that will transform your understanding of sexuality.</p><p><strong>Resources</strong></p><p>Get the free <a href="https://www.patriciarich.com/6sgraphic"><strong>The Six S's of Sexual Self-Energy Infographic.</strong></a></p><p><br></p>
34 total episodes available
Recent guests on Self-Led in Bed: An IFS and Sexuality Podcast
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Achara Tarfa
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Jennifer Weissner
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Kory Andreas
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