F them fish! ADHD for grownups
Claim This Podcastby F them fish
Podcast Overview
<p>AuDHD for grownups: honest, funny conversations about work, relationships, sensory overload, identity, and the stuff nobody explains after diagnosis.</p><br><p>We're passionate about raising awareness for NDers and their allies. Let's push off the stigma of what you ‘can’t’ ask and reinvent this whole discussion. Come and join us!</p><br><p>We are absolutely NOT mental health professionals and this is not a diagnostic tool. Also, neurodivergence is a social identity, not a medical one...</p><br><p>Come and join the F them fish community on the socials, we have quite an active conversation and share all the things you hear about on the podcast:</p><p><br></p><ul><li><a href="https://www.instagram.com/fthemfish_audhdforgrownups/?hl=en#" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">Instagram</a></li><li><a href="www.linkedin.com/in/callie-elward-barrett-263068142" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">LinkedIn</a></li><li><a href="https://www.tiktok.com/@fthemfish_audhd4grownups?is_from_webapp=1&sender_device=pc" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">TikTok</a></li><li><a href="https://www.facebook.com/fthemfishADHDforgrownups" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">Facebook</a></li></ul><hr><p style='color:grey; font-size:0.75em;'> Hosted on Acast. See <a style='color:grey;' target='_blank' rel='noopener noreferrer' href='https://acast.com/privacy'>acast.com/privacy</a> for more information.</p>
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Publishing Since
7/30/2022
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Recent Episodes
June 23, 2026
Ep. 56 I Want to Do It, So Why Can’t I? PDA Explained
<p>What is adult PDA (Pathological Demand Avoidance), and what does neurodivergent demand paralysis feel like from the inside? In this episode of F Them Fish: AuDHD for Grownups, your neurodivergent besties Callie and Jayne dive deep into the PDA cycle, burnout, and why everyday tasks can trigger a nervous system shutdown.</p><p>This podcast was created on the lands of the Ngunnawal, Wadawurrung, and Dja Dja Wurrung Peoples.</p><br><p>Hello, hello, and welcome to <strong>F Them Fish: AuDHD for Grownups</strong> with your neurodivergent besties, Callie Elward-Barrett and Jayne Gurton. Where we talk about neurodivergence in real adult life: work, relationships, burnout, overwhelm, identity, and all the weird little things that make you think, ‘surely it’s not just me’. We’re honest, occasionally sweary, and very much not interested in pretending to be polished.</p><p>Grab a beverage, or body double some life admin with us in your ears, and let’s get started.</p><br><p>PDA gets discussed constantly online, but it is often reduced to ‘not liking being told what to do’. In this episode, Callie and Jayne dig underneath that explanation. They look at what PDA feels like from the inside and what current research can and cannot tell us.</p><br><p>Callie walks through a proposed PDA cycle, from detecting a demand through to the nervous system’s appraisal of effort, uncertainty, safety, sensory discomfort, autonomy, and available capacity. They also discuss why avoidance can provide enough immediate relief to reinforce the pattern, even when it creates more distress later. They explore practical ways to reduce friction, including recognising personal triggers, creating safer sensory conditions, increasing clarity and certainty, protecting capacity, and resisting the idea that every struggle can be fixed by applying more pressure.</p><br><p><strong>In this episode:</strong></p><p><br></p><ul><li>PDA burnout and executive dysfunction in adults</li><li>How to manage PDA paralysis</li><li>AuDHD (Autism and ADHD) and demand avoidance</li><li>Difficult school mornings, parenting guilt, and repairing after things go badly</li><li>PDA in everyday life</li><li>Pathological demand avoidance versus pervasive drive for autonomy</li><li>What science currently knows, and does not know, about PDA</li><li>Why PDA is more complicated than anxiety, defiance, or simply disliking demands</li><li>How demands may be assessed for effort, uncertainty, sensory discomfort, safety, and loss of control</li><li>The relationship between stress, executive functioning, and PDA paralysis</li><li>How avoidance can reinforce future avoidance</li><li>Identifying triggers and creating more supportive sensory and environmental conditions</li><li>Similarities and differences between PDA and ODD</li></ul><p><br></p><p><strong>Timestamps</strong></p><p><strong>00:00</strong> A difficult morning, parenting guilt, and trying to repair</p><p><strong>10:55</strong> Overwhelm and a real-life PDA segue</p><p><strong>19:11</strong> PDA explained: pathological demand avoidance and pervasive drive for autonomy</p><p><strong>25:13</strong> What research can, and cannot, currently tell us about PDA</p><p><strong>31:06</strong> The PDA cycle: demands, appraisal, stress, and reduced executive access</p><p><strong>40:30</strong> PDA paralysis, chronic illness, limited capacity, and shame</p><p><strong>44:49</strong> Why avoidance can temporarily help and reinforce the cycle</p><p><strong>49:14</strong> What might help: triggers, sensory needs, certainty, and supportive conditions</p><p><strong>57:07</strong> Why PDA changes with context, safety, capacity, and sensory load</p><p><strong>01:01:19</strong> PDA versus ODD: similarities, differences, and why neither is a choice</p><br><p>PDA remains a developing and contested area. This conversation combines available research discussed during recording with Callie and Jayne’s lived and professional experience. It is not medical advice, and people may understand or describe their experiences differently.</p><br><p><strong>Connect</strong></p><p>Find us on <a href="https://www.youtube.com/@FThemFish_AuDHDForGrownups" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">YouTube</a>, <a href="https://www.instagram.com/fthemfish_audhdforgrownups/" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">Instagram</a> and <a href="https://www.tiktok.com/@fthemfish_audhd4grownups" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">TikTok</a> at F Them Fish: AuDHD for Grownups</p><p>Send your stories and questions to <a href="mailto:FThemFish@gmail.com" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">FThemFish@gmail.com</a></p><br><p>AuDHD for grownups: honest, funny conversations about work, relationships, sensory overload, identity, and the stuff nobody explains after diagnosis.</p><p>Follow or subscribe so you do not miss an episode, and leave us a five-star review if the pod makes you feel understood, entertained, or slightly less alone.</p><p>AuDHD for grownups: honest, funny conversations about work, relationships, sensory overload, identity, and the stuff nobody explains after diagnosis.</p><hr><p style='color:grey; font-size:0.75em;'> Hosted on Acast. See <a style='color:grey;' target='_blank' rel='noopener noreferrer' href='https://acast.com/privacy'>acast.com/privacy</a> for more information.</p>
June 16, 2026
Ep. 55 Men's Mental Health In Crisis: What Happens When Men Go Quiet
<p>Hello, hello, and welcome to F Them Fish: AuDHD for Grownups with your neurodivergent besties, Callie Elward-Barrett and Jayne Gurton. This is the podcast where we talk about neurodivergence in real adult life: work, relationships, burnout, overwhelm, identity, and all the weird little things that make you think, ‘surely it’s not just me.’ We’re honest, occasionally sweary, and very much not interested in pretending to be polished.</p><p>Grab a beverage, or body double some life admin with us in your ears and let’s get started!</p><br><p><strong>Content note: this episode includes discussion of men’s mental health, suicide, mining culture, isolation, alcohol, and the emotional impact of working away from home. Please take care while listening, and use the support links below if anything in this episode brings things up for you.</strong></p><br><p>Callie and Jayne are joined by Rhys Heland, a WA mining professional, Callie’s brother-ish, and guest at Pod HQ in The Nook.</p><p>What starts with Thirsty Merc, email shame, and Callie’s deeply committed front-row concert behaviour becomes a powerful conversation about men’s mental health, mining culture, FIFO-style isolation, and what can happen when men are expected to just keep going.</p><br><p>Rhys shares the story of <strong>Dragged to the Mines</strong>, a Pilbara project that used drag photography to challenge blokey mining culture and open up conversations about masculinity, mental health and suicide. He talks about life in remote mining environments, long swings, tiny dongas, twelve-hour days, fatigue, isolation, welfare checks, alcohol rules, and the reality of trying to stay connected to family and community while working away.</p><br><p>The conversation also explores what withdrawal can look like, why going quiet can be a warning sign, and how the smallest conversations can matter. Sometimes the starting point is not a perfect mental health script. Sometimes it is asking about dinner, family, footy, trivia night, or whether someone has spoken to anyone lately.</p><p>Callie, Jayne and Rhys also talk about the idea of having a code phrase with your people, like “I need seven seconds,” for those moments when explaining everything feels too hard but being alone with it feels worse.</p><br><p><strong>This episode is not medical advice.</strong> It is three people having a real conversation about men, mental health, neurodivergence, isolation, work, resilience, and the importance of asking the hard questions gently.</p><br><p><br></p><p><br></p><h4><strong>Timestamps:</strong></h4><p>00:00 – Intro</p><p>02:00 – Callie REALLY loves Thirsty Merc</p><p>10:54 – Dragged to the Mines</p><p>13:28 – Mining, masculinity and mental health</p><p>15:43 – Isolation</p><p>16:18 – Being away from family</p><p>35:30 – Withdrawal</p><p>35:55 – How men may show distress</p><p>36:57 – The power of a simple phrase</p><p>37:34 – Small talk as big talk</p><p>38:18 – Creating a code</p><p>43:06 – Neuroplasticity, resilience and mindset</p><p>51:51 – Asking hard questions gently</p><p>52:26 – What you can do</p><br><p><strong>Support:</strong></p><br><p><strong>Lifeline Australia </strong></p><p>24/7 crisis support and suicide prevention</p><p>Call: 13 11 14</p><p>Text: 0477 13 11 14</p><p><a href="https://www.lifeline.org.au/" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://www.lifeline.org.au/</a></p><br><p><strong>MensLine Australia </strong></p><p>24/7 counselling and support for men</p><p>Call: 1300 78 99 78</p><p><a href="https://mensline.org.au/" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://mensline.org.au/</a></p><br><p><strong>Suicide Call Back Service</strong></p><p>24/7 phone and online counselling for people affected by suicide</p><p>Call: 1300 659 467</p><p><a href="https://www.suicidecallbackservice.org.au/" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://www.suicidecallbackservice.org.au/</a></p><br><p><strong>Beyond Blue</strong></p><p>Mental health support and men’s mental health resources</p><p>Call: 1300 22 4636</p><p><a href="https://www.beyondblue.org.au/mental-health/mens-mental-health" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://www.beyondblue.org.au/mental-health/mens-mental-health</a></p><br><p><strong>MATES in Mining</strong></p><p>Suicide prevention and mental health support for the mining industry</p><p><a href="https://mining.mates.org.au/" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://mining.mates.org.au/</a></p><br><p><strong>13YARN</strong></p><p>24/7 crisis support for Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander people</p><p>Call: 13 92 76</p><p><a href="https://www.13yarn.org.au/" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://www.13yarn.org.au/</a></p><br><p><strong>Links </strong></p><p><a href="https://www.abc.net.au/news/2019-06-06/dragged-from-the-mines-project-shines-light-mens-mental-health/11176884" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">Dragged to the Mines</a></p><p><a href="https://www.theguardian.com/artanddesign/2025/apr/23/inside-the-world-of-skimpies-the-barmaids-in-bras-who-pour-pints-in-australias-mining-towns" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">Skimpies in WA</a></p><p><a href="https://www.thirstymerc.com/" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">Thirsty Merc</a></p><br><p><br></p><p><br></p><h3>Connect</h3><p>Find us on <a href="https://www.youtube.com/@FThemFish_AuDHDForGrownups" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">YouTube</a>, <a href="https://www.instagram.com/fthemfish_audhdforgrownups/" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">Instagram </a>and <a href="https://www.tiktok.com/@fthemfish_audhd4grownups" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">TikTok</a> at F Them Fish: AuDHD for Grownups</p><p>Send your stories and questions to <a href="mailto:FThemFish@gmail.com" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">FThemFish@gmail.com</a></p><br><p>AuDHD for grownups: honest, funny conversations about work, relationships, sensory overload, identity, and the stuff nobody explains after diagnosis.</p><p>This podcast was created on the lands of the Ngunnawal, Wadawurrung and Dja Dja Wurrung Peoples</p><p>AuDHD for grownups: honest, funny conversations about work, relationships, sensory overload, identity, and the stuff nobody explains after diagnosis.</p><hr><p style='color:grey; font-size:0.75em;'> Hosted on Acast. See <a style='color:grey;' target='_blank' rel='noopener noreferrer' href='https://acast.com/privacy'>acast.com/privacy</a> for more information.</p>
June 9, 2026
Ep. 54 Don't Pick On the Flower, Change the Soil: What Adults Get Wrong About ADHD Kids (with PB)
<p>Hello, hello, and welcome to F Them Fish: AuDHD for Grownups with your neurodivergent besties, Callie Elward-Barrett and Jayne Gurton. This is the podcast where we talk about neurodivergence in real adult life: work, relationships, burnout, overwhelm, identity, and all the weird little things that make you think, ‘surely it’s not just me.’ We’re honest, occasionally sweary, and very much not interested in pretending to be polished.</p><br><p>Grab a beverage, or body double some life admin with us in your ears and let’s get started!</p><br><p>In this episode, Callie sits down with Twice-Exceptional PB - 11 year-old host of the popular podcast: 'PB's Productions, My ADHD Kids Podcast', that she started when she was only 8 years old!. PB has a lot of insights to share about what it really means to be a kid with ADHD. She talks with an incredible poise and emotional intelligence that most adults would be proud of. There are multiple moments that will make you stop and think a little deeper about the young people in your life, whether you're a parent, teacher, or favourite Aunty. </p><br><p>The episode keeps coming back to adults assuming they know, not asking what kids need, and mistaking ADHD challenges for intentional misbehaviour. </p><br><p>In a world full of adults explaining ADHD kids, this episode lets an ADHD kid explain it herself. Share this episode with the ADHD kids you know and ask them if they agree, or what they might say differently. And more importantly, share it with any adults who need to hear it. </p><br><p><strong>"Try, be you, be kind, and bloom like that sunflower. Bloom bright... Just try, believe in yourself, because you are amazing." PB</strong></p><br><p><br></p><h3>Timestamps</h3><ul><li>00:15 – Meet PB, ADHD kid podcaster</li><li>02:05 – “I have a more advanced brain” PB introduces herself as a kid with ADHD, big thoughts, humour and a grown-up way of seeing things.</li><li>02:44 – If your ADHD brain had a theme song</li><li>08:19 – PB describes her brain in three words and explains what it is like when funny thoughts arrive at exactly the wrong moment.</li><li>09:54 – Why PB started her own ADHD podcast and why kids need to hear from other kids, not only adults talking about them.</li><li>13:56 – ADHD explained by an actual ADHD kid.</li><li>15:11 – What adults get wrong about ADHD kids</li><li>17:30 – “I don’t believe you” and “you did it on purpose” two things she wishes adults would stop saying to ADHD kids.</li><li>19:00 – What is actually cool about ADHD</li><li>21:07 – ADHD brain control panel</li><li>24:02 – The ultimate ADHD gadget</li><li>27:18 – Rapid-fire ADHD would-you-rathers</li><li>28:58 – The question adults should ask more often “What do you need?” and why that matters.</li><li>31:18 – The question PB is sick of adults asking and what adults might miss when they judge attention from the outside.</li><li>34:47 – What to say to ADHD kids who feel too much - a beautiful answer about being the perfect amount for yourself and blooming in your own way.</li><li>36:40 – ADHD is not about trying harder</li><li>37:38 – Bloom bright like a sunflower.</li><li>38:02 – Where to find PB’s podcast</li></ul><h3><br></h3><h3>Connect</h3><p>Find us on <a href="https://www.youtube.com/@FThemFish_AuDHDForGrownups" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">YouTube</a>, <a href="https://www.instagram.com/fthemfish_audhdforgrownups/" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">Instagram </a>and <a href="https://www.tiktok.com/@fthemfish_audhd4grownups" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">TikTok</a> at F Them Fish: AuDHD for Grownups</p><p>Send your stories and questions to <a href="mailto:FThemFish@gmail.com" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">FThemFish@gmail.com</a></p><p>AuDHD for grownups: honest, funny conversations about work, relationships, sensory overload, identity, and the stuff nobody explains after diagnosis.</p><br><p>This podcast was created on the lands of the Ngunnawal, Ngambri, Wadawurrung and Dja Dja Wurrung Peoples. Always was, always will be Aboriginal Land.</p><p>AuDHD for grownups: honest, funny conversations about work, relationships, sensory overload, identity, and the stuff nobody explains after diagnosis.</p><hr><p style='color:grey; font-size:0.75em;'> Hosted on Acast. See <a style='color:grey;' target='_blank' rel='noopener noreferrer' href='https://acast.com/privacy'>acast.com/privacy</a> for more information.</p>
57 total episodes available
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Frequently asked questions
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- What is F them fish! ADHD for grownups?
<p>AuDHD for grownups: honest, funny conversations about work, relationships, sensory overload, identity, and the stuff nobody explains after diagnosis.</p><br><p>We're passionate about raising awareness for NDers and their allies. Let's push off the stigma of what you ‘can’t’ ask and reinvent this whole discussion. Come and join us!</p><br><p>We are absolutely NOT mental health professionals and this is not a diagnostic tool. Also, neurodivergence is a social identity, not a medical one...</p><br><p>Come and join the F them fish community on the socials, we have quite an active conversation and share all the things you hear about on the podcast:</p><p><br></p><ul><li><a href="https://www.instagram.com/fthemfish_audhdforgrownups/?hl=en#" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">Instagram</a></li><li><a href="www.linkedin.com/in/callie-elward-barrett-263068142" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">LinkedIn</a></li><li><a href="https://www.tiktok.com/@fthemfish_audhd4grownups?is_from_webapp=1&sender_device=pc" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">TikTok</a></li><li><a href="https://www.facebook.com/fthemfishADHDforgrownups" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">Facebook</a></li></ul><hr><p style='color:grey; font-size:0.75em;'> Hosted on Acast. See <a style='color:grey;' target='_blank' rel='noopener noreferrer' href='https://acast.com/privacy'>acast.com/privacy</a> for more information.</p> - How often does this podcast release new episodes?
This podcast updates daily.
- Where can I listen to this podcast?
This podcast is available on 4 platforms including Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and more. You can also use the RSS feed directly.
- Does this podcast accept guests?
Yes, this podcast regularly features guests.
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