by Kristina Orlova
Unlock the secrets of OCD. Expert insights, personal stories, and practical tips. Learn all things OCD with the OCD Whisperer Podcast. #allthingsocd
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🇺🇲
Publishing Since
3/7/2020
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April 29, 2025
You wash your hands… but did you really get them clean? You wiped down the package… but what if something invisible is still there? You tell yourself it’s fine, yet your brain won’t let it go. If that sounds familiar, you’re not alone. In this episode of the OCD Whisperer Podcast, Kristina Orlova welcomes back Mike Parker, licensed clinical social worker and creator of the OCD Space YouTube channel, to explore the obsessive doubt that drives contamination fears—and the path out of its grip. Together, they dive into the complexities of inference-based cognitive behavioral therapy (ICBT) and how it helps those with OCD step out of fear-driven reasoning and back into reality. But how do you convince your mind to trust your senses when OCD keeps whispering “what if”? Whether it’s worries about unseen germs on a park bench, contamination from a package, or the lingering fear of harming others through inaction, this conversation lays it bare. Mike and Kristina break down the difference between healthy caution and compulsive checking, and why the way we reason matters just as much as the content of our fears. They explore how OCD hijacks imagination and certainty, and why choosing functional certainty—the decision to act as if you’re okay unless proven otherwise—can be a powerful turning point. Can you learn to trust your senses again? Or will your imagination keep calling the shots? Tune in and find out—this might just change how you see everything… especially what you can’t see. Let's dive in! In This Episode [00:00:03] Introduction to the episode [00:00:53] Understanding ICBT [00:01:08] Discussion on contamination fears [00:02:13] Addressing invisible threats [00:03:04] Grounding in reality [00:06:37] Healthy reasoning vs. OCD reasoning [00:10:21] Living with possibility [00:12:06] Inferential confusion in OCD [00:13:33] Constantly thinking about the unseen [00:14:24] Helping clients recognize reality [00:15:29] The challenge of OCD as a competitor [00:16:50] Understanding reality and OCD [00:18:48] Trust and perception [00:19:30] Reality sensing in CBT [00:20:43] Behavioral change and CBT [00:21:58] Individualized treatment approaches [00:23:01] Possibility vs. sensory information [00:24:02] Relying on senses [00:24:25] Closing remarks and resources Notable Quotes [03:04] "It's true our senses can't detect certain things, but we have ways of dealing with that. They're already established, you know, as far as hand washing routines or, you know, if it's a religious situation, how much you should pray, what rituals you should do." — Mike Parker [06:06] "Healthy reasoning is like, okay, I know the limitations of my senses. I know what information I have available, and then ultimately I'm gonna make that decision based on that." — Mike Parker [07:07] "If you really want to sit on park benches and stop doing that. Let's realize you don't have to actually concern yourself with what you can't." — Mike Parker [15:59] "So, right, what you're telling me basically, is you're walking down the street and you have no visible poop on you, and you don't smell poop on you, and you're thinking about poop. We gotta figure out what's going on there, because you don't do that anywhere else in life." — Mike Parker [21:58] "I’m open about my OCD. There’s still a certain way I thought, and next thing you know, you’re right back in this anxious state that just feels horrendous.'." — Kristina [23:12] "Even in an area where your senses can't detect anything, the reasonable, rational way to live is to do that functional certainty thing and just to assume you're okay." — Mike Parker Our Guest Mike Parker, LCSW, is a licensed clinical social worker and private practice therapist based in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania. He specializes in treating obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) using cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) and inference-based cognitive therapy (I-CBT). As the host of the OCD Space YouTube channel, Mike is dedicated
April 15, 2025
There’s a quiet tension in love when you live with OCD—an unshakable feeling that something’s off, followed by crushing doubt: Is this real, or is it just my disorder? You learn to second-guess yourself, to dismiss your instincts, to stay in places that feel unsafe because your brain tells you fear is always a lie. But what if it isn’t? In this episode of The OCD Whisperer Podcast, host Kristina Orlova talks with marine biologist, Antarctic researcher, and Braving the Waves author Ally Kristan about the dangerous intersection of OCD and relationships. Diagnosed at 12, Ally knows how OCD can distort reality—how you can mistake manipulation for reassurance, red flags for intrusive thoughts, and chaos for normalcy. Together, they explore the heart of the dilemma: How do you trust yourself when your mind has betrayed you before? OCD doesn’t just invent fears—it can bury real ones, conditioning you to ignore the quiet voice that says, This isn’t right. They unpack how manipulative partners exploit OCD’s vulnerabilities—love bombing, gaslighting, instability disguised as passion. And they offer a counterpoint: what safe, steady love can actually feel like. This episode isn’t just insight—it’s an invitation. To stop gaslighting yourself. To reclaim your instincts. To step into relationships that feel like peace instead of war. The question isn’t can you trust yourself again. It’s: are you ready to try? Let’s get into it! In This Episode [00:03] Introduction to Ally Kristan [01:00] Understanding OCD's impact [01:24] Distinguishing intrusive thoughts [02:32] Toxic relationships and therapy [04:48] Recognizing red flags [05:38] Love bombing explained [09:29] Gaslighting and its effects [10:12] Identifying healthy relationships [14:22] The role of reassurance in relationships [15:05] Navigating compulsive behaviors [16:18] Understanding relationship dynamics [16:46] Understanding OCD and relationships [17:10] Healthy relationship dynamics [18:07] Identifying toxic traits [18:54] Consistency in relationships [20:01] Evaluating relationship feelings [20:32] Comparing friendships to relationships [22:18] Good days vs. bad days [22:56] Rebuilding trust in instincts [23:21] Meditation for clarity [26:43] Nature as a healing tool [27:13] Finding the right meditation [28:32] Time and practice for intuition [29:20] Differentiating symptoms [32:03] Closing thoughts and Ally’s resources Notable Quotes [02:09] “It is really difficult to know the difference between the OCD noise and something that your gut instinct is telling you, especially in relationships." — Ally [06:52] "Love bombing is definitely something to look out for, especially if it's somebody pursuing you who you're not initially interested in. That should be a little bit of a red flag." — Ally [08:42] "When you're with someone who does truly love you and have your best interest at heart, they're going to make it feel like loving you is easier than breathing." — Ally [09:37] "Gaslighting is when somebody is basically making you doubt your own sense of reality." — Ally [17:47] "I really do believe that if you're with somebody who's really making you safe and really does have your best interest at heart, it's not going to exacerbate your OCD symptoms." — Ally [28:40] "Trying to regain touch with your own intuition and mind again, it takes time and practice and consistency, but once you get there, it's like the floodgates are open and such a sense of restored peace." — Ally Our Guest Ally Kristan is a marine biologist, wildlife advocate, and author of Braving the Waves, a memoir exploring her journey with OCD and toxic relationships. Her work has been featured in National Geographic, NPR, and Audubon Magazine. Through speaking engagements and her Instagram (@UpYourAlly), Ally empowers others to reclaim self-trust and navigate mental health challenges with resilience. Resources & Links Kristina Orlova, LMFT Instagram YouTube OCD CBT Journal Tracker an
April 1, 2025
In this riveting episode of the OCD Whisperer podcast, host Kristina Orlova sits down with Mike Parker, a licensed clinical social worker and the creator of the popular YouTube channel OCD Space. Together, they embark on a deep dive into the world of OCD and the transformative power of Inference based cognitive-behavioral therapy (ICBT). But what happens when doubt becomes the driving force behind every thought? And how can someone trapped in the cycle of obsessional doubt ever learn to trust their own mind again? Mike Parker pulls back the curtain on the insidious nature of "obsessional doubt," a phenomenon that leaves individuals questioning their every thought, memory, and perception. Why do those with OCD feel compelled to seek reassurance over and over, even when they know it offers only fleeting relief? And how does this relentless doubt keep them locked in a prison of their own mind? As the conversation deepens, Kristina and Mike explore the critical differences between ICBT and exposure and response prevention (ERP). But here’s the burning question: Can understanding the origin of obsessive thoughts be the key to breaking free from their grip? Mike sheds light on how inferential confusion and obsessional doubt drive OCD. This episode is a masterclass in navigating the labyrinth of OCD treatment. Will listeners walk away with a newfound understanding of how to confront their doubts? Or will the complexities of the human mind leave them questioning everything they thought they knew? Tune in to uncover the answers—and perhaps, a path to freedom. In This Episode [00:02] Introduction to the episode [00:56] Understanding ICBT [02:00] Obsessional doubt explained [02:21] Differentiating ICBT from ERP [03:36] The nature of obsessional doubt [05:58] Reassurance-seeking behavior [09:25] Understanding internal evidence [11:27] The role of self-knowledge [13:31] General facts vs. personal context [14:49] Handling real mistakes [16:40] Exploring early memories [17:46] Understanding obsessional doubt [19:22] Childhood influences on OCD [20:28] Clarifying ICBT vs. psychodynamic therapy [21:44] Focus of inference-based CBT [22:41] Cognitive distortions in OCD [25:34] Re-evaluating daily routines [27:06] Timeframe for progress in treatment [29:22] Complicating factors in OCD treatment Notable Quotes [00:02:42] "Obsessional doubt is a core process identified in OCD when you’re doing I-CBT. It’s a thought process where someone with OCD knows something but doesn’t trust themselves enough to stick with what they know, leading them to question, dismiss, and seek more information than they have." - Michael Parker [00:18:26] "We can start to see how long the client has been telling themselves an obsessional story about themselves... It was all logged in there and then all put together, but if we go back, we can see this actually never meant you should be locked into never-ending doubt." - Michael Parker [00:23:39]"I-CBT is primarily a cognitive therapy... The focus really is figuring out why you reject information, why you don't trust it... Let's figure out why you doubted." — Michael Parker Our Guest Mike Parker, LCSW, is a licensed clinical social worker and private practice therapist based in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania. He specializes in treating obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) using cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) and inference-based cognitive therapy (I-CBT). As the host of the OCD Space YouTube channel, Mike is dedicated to educating individuals and mental health professionals on effective OCD treatment approaches. He is passionate about helping clients understand and overcome obsessional doubt while also training fellow therapists in evidence-based interventions. With a focus on empowering individuals to trust themselves and break free from the cycle of compulsions, Mike continues to be a leading voice in the OCD treatment community. Resour
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